by Gina Wilkins
“Are you supposed to meet your group today?”
She nodded. “We’re meeting at one. We’ll probably work five or six hours, but I can get away early if…”
“No,” he interrupted firmly. “You won’t change one minute of your schedule for my sake. If I see you only ten minutes a day, I’ll be content with that. I promise you, Annie, you aren’t going to regret agreeing to this plan. In fact, you’re going to like it so much you’re never going to want me to leave.”
Which only gave her something else to worry about, she decided immediately.
“Will your neighbors be a problem? Do I need to try to sneak in and out of your apartment while you’re gone?”
She shook her head. “The apartment on the right, the one that shares my landing, has been empty for a few weeks. I think it’s being repainted or something. The neighbor on the left works nights and sleeps days, so I almost never see him. He wouldn’t notice if a whole family moved in with me, as long as we’re relatively quiet while he’s sleeping.”
“I’ll keep that in mind.” He moved toward the doorway. “I’m going down to get the rest of my things out of my car. Then I’ll find a place for everything so my stuff won’t be in your way.”
“I can help you.”
“Nope. I can handle it. You study or whatever you need to do this morning.”
Hoping she would be able to concentrate with him moving around in the background, she nodded. They might as well get started on finding out if this impulsive scheme of his would work.
She wasn’t at all sure she wouldn’t have to ask him to leave eventually. The thought of doing so filled her with both dread and sadness that she pushed aside as she spread her books and her computer on the kitchen table.
Liam had seen Anne study before. Even on the few long weekends when she’d sneaked away to join him somewhere, she’d brought along her computer and notes. She’d always kept her books open and accessible even when she’d focused on him.
She’d studied at least a couple of hours a day when she was with him, and he had never complained, since he’d usually had responsibilities of his own to tend to. Both of them were much too busy to let an entire two or three days pass without at least part of that time being spent on their careers.
He needn’t have worried too much about disturbing her, he thought with a wry smile. Sitting at the table with her computer and her books and notes, she didn’t even seem to notice when he moved around in the kitchen at noon making lunches for them both. He set a plate holding a sandwich and a handful of raw baby carrots in front of her, and she blinked as if she’d forgotten he was even there.
“You need to eat before you leave to join your study group. This should hold you for a while.”
“You really don’t have to wait on me while you’re here,” she said, though she reached automatically for the sandwich. “I manage to feed myself on my own.”
Not as often as she should, he thought with a glance at her slender frame. He decided he’d better keep that comment to himself. “It wasn’t any trouble,” he assured her. “It’s just as easy to make two sandwiches as one.”
When she’d eaten enough to satisfy him, she began to gather her books in preparation to leave for her study session with her group. “Did you get your things put away this morning?”
“I did. My clothes are in your closet and I set up my computer on the desk in the office and stashed my files in that empty desk drawer on the right side. Everything fit nicely.”
“Good. You’ll be able to work in the office?”
“Yeah, it’s fine.”
He didn’t care for the politely formal tone of their conversation. This was one of the reasons he’d chosen to work here, from her apartment, for the next few weeks. If it was possible, he wanted to get back the intimacy they had shared that summer in Britain, before their separate career pursuits and her family had driven a wedge between them again.
“I’d better go,” she said, picking up her stuffed backpack. “The gang is expecting me at one.”
Even knowing she would be spending the next few hours studying with her friends, he still envied them the time with her. And even though she’d assured him they were only friends, he wasn’t too happy that the group included two single men. He knew better than to express that objection, of course.
At least he had the satisfaction of knowing she was his wife, and that she took those vows seriously—even if those other men were unaware of her status. During the past months, he had come to the uncomfortable realization that his impetuous proposal in Scotland had at least in part been based on a streak of masculine possessiveness he hadn’t realized had been such a part of him. He hadn’t wanted to let Anne out of his sight again without making sure she would be thinking of him when she met all those interesting young doctors-in-training.
It wasn’t a motivation he was proud of, and he certainly knew better than to mention that bit of insight to Anne. She would have his ego for dinner.
“How long do your study sessions usually last?” he asked, keeping his tone deliberately casual.
She shrugged. “Depends on what we need to accomplish and whether anyone has other plans. Most weekends, we usually study for three or four hours straight, take a break, then go another two or three hours. Sometimes more, as the tests get closer.”
He couldn’t help frowning. “Long hours.”
“Yes, well, we’ve already established that. As I’ve told you, I’m surviving.”
Maybe so, but he didn’t like the toll it was taking on her. Still, she looked a bit better this afternoon, he decided, studying her surreptitiously. She appeared more rested than she had when he’d arrived. There was a bit more color in her face now, and he liked to think he’d played some part in putting it there.
She tried to deal with too much on her own; that was the problem. Easton pride and self-sufficiency kept her from asking for help, even when she needed it. So he figured he would have to help her without being asked. By the time he finished his revisions, he wanted to make sure she was healthy and relaxed, prepared for anything medical school could throw at her.
Unlike her family, he cared more about her happiness than her accomplishments.
“I hope you get a lot done today.”
She nodded. “Thanks. Good luck with your revisions.”
He moved out of her way when she walked toward the coat closet to grab a jacket. Despite the extra bedroom, her apartment was more efficiency than roomy. The kitchen was so small that Liam had bumped against her several times while they’d put away the dishes. She’d merely smiled when he’d apologized. He knew she wasn’t accustomed to sharing her space, but she didn’t seem to mind the close quarters. For now.
He predicted that as her next test approached, she would grow even more tense and distant. He could deal with that, he assured himself. Maybe he could even help her relax occasionally. He had a few tricks up his sleeve for just that purpose.
He smiled in anticipation.
The study group gathered at James Stillman’s condo that afternoon, as they so often did. James was single, his condo was spacious and his housekeeper always left plenty of home-baked snacks for their enjoyment, so they liked meeting there. He seemed to enjoy playing host, though Anne often had trouble reading James.
One thing she knew about him, he came from money. Perhaps that was just one child of privilege recognizing a kindred soul. The other three of their study group came from middle-class and blue-collar backgrounds, not that such social distinctions meant much when it came to the grueling demands of medical school. However disparate their backgrounds had been, med school exams had a way of leveling the playing field, so to speak.
James welcomed her in when she rang the bell. Though it was only ten past one, she was the last to arrive.
Tall and slender, with black hair and dark eyes, James always brought the word “elegant” to Anne’s mind. She considered him a study in contradictions. He moved with a somehow utterly mascul
ine grace, interacted warmly with their group of friends while still holding a part of himself back and studied as hard as any of them though the material seemed to come to him almost without effort on his part. At twenty-seven, he was the second oldest in the group, Anne being the youngest. James had obtained a PhD in microbiology before entering medical school. He’d explained that he’d decided too late to attain an M.D. to combine the two degrees into one program.
Haley, Ron and Connor gathered around the big table where they always spread their computers, books and papers, holding cups of coffee and helping themselves to chocolate chip cookies from a china plate.
Haley spoke first. “Hi, Anne. We were beginning to wonder where you were. You’re never late.”
“Ten minutes isn’t very late.” Anne dropped her heavy computer-and-book bag onto “her” chair and moved toward the coffeemaker.
“For you it is.” Haley Wright smiled from the chair where she always sat when they met here. Of medium height, the amber-eyed brunette was slender and long-legged, though somewhat more curvy than Anne. Anne was aware that she, herself, had lost a bit too much weight recently, resulting in a more fragile and waiflike appearance than she would have liked, so she snagged a couple of cookies to go with her coffee.
Sandy-haired, blue-eyed Ron Gibson had a smear of chocolate on his full lower lip when he grinned at Anne. “How was the family dinner last night?”
She rolled her eyes. “It was very nice—though I endured at least three separate lectures about not falling behind, in addition to maybe half a dozen stories about how much harder medical school was for my grandfather, my dad and my brother.”
Always the clown, Ron laughed. “It’s like I keep saying. You’re sticking much too close to the family tree. You should have joined the circus or something and then you couldn’t be constantly compared to the other family physicians.”
She didn’t have to fake her grimace. “Yeah, that would have gone over real well with the Easton clan. Their daughter, the circus performer. I might as well have driven a stake through their hearts.”
Haley looked at Anne over the screen of her laptop computer. “Despite what you say, spending the evening with your family must have been good for you. You look a little more relaxed today than you have lately.”
“I guess you’re right.” Anne busied herself with her own computer to avoid any further reply.
Ron released a gusty sigh as he dragged a thick stack of papers in front of him. “Man, they loaded us up with slides this week. We’ll never get through them all.”
“Of course we will.” Ever the optimist and the group cheerleader, Haley spoke firmly. “We just have to keep pushing ahead, a few at a time.”
Ron retorted with typical facetiousness, “That’s all we have to do, huh? Gee, I wish I’d known it would be so easy. I wouldn’t have had to worry so much.”
Haley started to snap back at him, but James interceded smoothly. “Where should we begin? The pharmacology or pathology slides?”
Even as she participated in the ensuing discussions, it bothered Anne that Haley and Ron seemed to be quarreling more lately. The stress got to all of them occasionally, but Haley and Ron seemed particularly inclined to take it out on each other.
She still remembered an embarrassing incident last year when she’d broken down in tears in front of her study mates. She’d been overwhelmed with schoolwork, her mother had suffered a setback in her recovery, she hadn’t heard from Liam in weeks and she’d been seriously sleep deprived. All of which had contributed to a meltdown that humiliated her even now when she thought about it. Her friends had been very supportive, which made her feel even guiltier at times for not telling them about Liam. Especially Haley.
The five of them had drifted together during their first semester to study as a group, and they had become true friends since. Anne didn’t know what she would have done without them. While lying had become a part of her life during the past year and a half, she thought it was even harder to lie to her study friends than it was to her own family. Which seemed so wrong until she reminded herself primly that it was her family’s own fault the lies had been necessary.
They had been studying for two hours without a break when Ron groaned and tossed down his pen. “I’ve got to move around, guys. My neck’s killing me.”
“How about a quick game?” James motioned toward the large-screen TV in his living room. It was connected to a top-of-the-line gaming system—another reason why the guys liked studying at his place. He theorized that game breaks helped keep the blood flowing to the brain, which increased the efficiency of their study time. Haley and Anne thought that was blatant male rationalization, but they didn’t begrudge the breaks and often joined the games.
“I’m not in the mood to play today, but you guys go ahead.” Haley stood and bent sideways to loosen her stiff muscles. “I just need to move around a little, then I want to check my e-mail.”
She stretched, lifting her arms high above her head and going up on tiptoes. The movement made her blue knit top rise to show an inch-and-a-half gap of creamy skin above the waistband of her jeans. Anne noticed Ron focusing on that exposed area for a moment.
She had always wondered if there was something more to the sparring between Haley and Ron than either would admit—maybe didn’t even realize themselves. Or maybe they really did just get on each other’s nerves, she thought, telling herself not to look for hidden romances everywhere just because of her own situation.
She couldn’t help laughing when the guys moved eagerly into the living room. “Just like three first grade boys when the recess bell rings,” she muttered.
Haley laughed as she punched a couple of keys on her computer. “Exactly. You and I need to do something fun soon. Why don’t we take a couple of hours to go shopping next weekend? I’m getting pretty desperate for some decent pants to wear on ICM days, when we’re supposed to look professional. I can’t imagine why they don’t consider our usual class wear of ratty jeans and sweatshirts to be professional enough.”
Anne laughed at the joke, then groaned, “You’re forgetting Margo.”
Margo was another student in their class. Known derogatorily as a “gunner,” she was always at the front of the room, making herself very visible to the professors, highly competitive with her classmates, arguing for every extra point on the tests and making sure everyone knew her scores were among the highest every time.
Margo would never be seen in the jeans and sneakers most of her peers wore to lectures. Her hair and makeup were always perfect, her clothing tailored and perfectly pressed. She even wore heels. Every day.
How Margo kept up her appearance and still managed the same grueling study hours as everyone else was anyone’s guess; Anne certainly couldn’t do it. Most days, she barely managed to throw on casual clothes and slap a little makeup onto her too-pale face. Her hair was usually in a loose braid or ponytail or clipped back with a barrette. She dressed the part of a doctor-in-training for her Introduction to Clinical Medicine days, when she actually saw patients under highly supervised and very limited conditions, but more often she looked like what she was. A harried student.
“Margo.” Haley scowled. “The woman isn’t human.”
Anne chuckled. “You could be right.”
“So, what do you say? Shopping? Next Saturday? To celebrate the completion of one more test cycle before we have to start the next?”
Anne considered the suggestion. Liam would still be at her apartment next weekend. But keeping in mind their agreement that she would go about her schedule as if nothing in her life had changed, she nodded. “That sounds like fun.”
“Great.” Haley laughed wryly. “It’s not as if we have anything better to do, since neither of us have a social life. I can’t even remember my last date. Can you?”
“Mmm.” Leaving that to be interpreted however, Anne shuffled papers to avoid saying more.
“Maybe we should go to a bar and try to pick up a couple of guys
. Just for fun.”
Anne winced at the suggestion. “I don’t think I’d be interested in that right now. I don’t have time for myself, much less anyone else.”
“I didn’t say we should go looking for soul mates.” Haley rolled her eyes teasingly. “Just a couple of Mr. Right Nows to entertain us for a few hours.”
“That would require way too much energy. I’d rather just shop and then crash for a lazy evening before starting the next cycle.”
“Like you’re going to spend a whole evening not studying,” Haley accused.
Anne laughed shortly. “You’re probably right. But maybe I’ll take a couple hours to soak in the tub and then relax in front of the TV or something before I start.”
Both preferably with Liam, she thought, looking down at her books to hide any hint of that thought from her friend.
“Did you hear about Kevin Brownlee and his wife? They’re getting a divorce. Laura told me yesterday.”
“Ouch. That makes like the third divorce in our class this year, doesn’t it?”
“We all knew how tough this would be going in,” Haley said with a shrug. “How little time would be left to devote to anyone else. The spouses should have known, as well. Maybe it really is best to wait until after med school to even consider marriage. Personally, I can’t imagine trying to juggle everything I’m dealing with now in addition to trying to keep a marriage together.”
Anne swallowed hard. “I guess it would be easier if the spouse in question had an equally demanding schedule. A busy life of his or her own.”
“So they would basically never see each other?” Haley frowned in consideration before shaking her head again. “Don’t see how that’s much better. Sounds like a setup for disaster to me. Growing apart, infidelity, that sort of thing. That’s what happened to Vivien, you know. Her husband found someone to entertain him while she was studying.”
Anne couldn’t take much more of this conversation. “We’re gossiping like a couple of my mom’s friends at a day spa,” she said with a light laugh. “We shouldn’t.”
