“Thank you again. I will be there. Nothing could keep me away.” I waved and walked back offstage and down the steps to head back outside.
Levi was waiting for me when I got outside. “Hey.” He walked over and sat on the ground next to me. “I got your letter.”
“I meant it all,” I whispered.
“I miss you. I broke up with Leah last month. I couldn’t be with her when it was you I was always thinking about. I never got over you.”
My heart beat faster. “You didn’t?”
“Nope.” His hand inched closer to mine on ground, until our pinkies touched. “Say it. Just once, I need to hear you say it.”
My breath hitched. “I love you.”
He moved in a split second. The kiss took me by surprise. His arms wrapped around me and pulled me tight against him. “I missed you so much,” he said.
“I was lost without you.”
“Julian told me how bad it got for you. I gave myself a time limit. I told myself I would wait a while. I was angry and full of pride. I should have come back to you sooner.” He kissed me again.
“I didn’t make it easy on you,” I said. “I pushed you away whenever you would talk to me.”
“That wasn’t your fault, though. I was the one who ended it, and it wasn’t fair for me to keep coming around. You haven’t been eating.” He frowned at me.
“I know. It was a rough few months. I’m getting better, though. After I wrote you the letter, it’s been getting easier and easier to just live again. I went to a party and everything.”
“I heard. I also heard about the asshole who wouldn't take no for an answer.” The look in his eyes was intense.
“Yeah, Julian was there, though, so no harm done.”
“Remind me to buy him dinner.” He kissed me again. The feel of him against me, his lips on mine, I could die happy. “God, I missed you,” I murmured into his lips.
“I promise you, I’ll never break your heart again.”
“I’m going to hold you to that.”
SPRING HAD COME AND NOT a second too soon. The earth was reborn, just as I was. Levi and I spent every available second together, making up for lost time.
“What are we doing tonight?” I asked him while we were in my bed reading. It was Friday night, and for once I didn't have anything I had to do until Monday.
“Want to go somewhere for the weekend?” he asked.
“Really? Where would we go?”
“There are some really cool bed and breakfasts on the coast we could try,” he suggested casually.
I sat up. “And how do you know about those?”
“I may or may not have researched them yesterday.” The corner of his mouth tugged up in a half smile.
“Did you happen to make a reservation at one of the places you researched?” I asked.
“I might have.”
“Well, what would I pack to go to this hypothetical place?” I got up and went to my closet.
“Just casual stuff, nothing fancy.” He put his arms behind his head and watched me pack.
“Don’t you need to pack?”
“Already done,” he said.
“When were you going to bring up this spontaneous trip? What if I hadn’t asked what our plans were?”
“I wasn't. I was going to drag you off as a surprise.”
I jumped back on the bed with him, covering him with kisses. “Have I told you how much I love you?”
“You might have mentioned it once or twice, but I never get sick of hearing it. Now go pack. I want to leave in ten minutes.” He swatted my butt.
We were on the road twenty minutes later, roaring off toward our mystery destination in Levi’s fancy car. He took my hand in his and brought it to his lips, brushing a soft kiss against my knuckles. It was simple things like that that I’d missed more than anything. Just being next to him, breathing him in.
“How far away is this place?” I asked.
“Less than an hour.”
As we drove, I got a little nervous. We were going to be all alone. No one was going to barge in and interrupt us. My nerves coiled up in my stomach.
“You’re quiet,” he remarked as we drove into Newport.
“Sorry, just thinking.”
“About?”
“Nothing really, just thinking.” I didn’t want to tell him I was nervous about being so alone with him.
“You don’t have to be nervous around me. When have I ever asked you for more than you wanted to give?”
“But what if I want to give more?” I whispered. He sucked in a breath and his grip on my hand tightened.
“Pay attention to the road, Klein. We’ll discuss it when we get there.” I laughed.
A few minutes later we pulled up in front of the Hydrangea House Inn. It was adorable, on a street that looked like it came off of a postcard. Levi grabbed our bags and led the way into the building.
“Hi, welcome to Hydrangea House. My name is Ellen. How can I make your stay amazing?” the older woman behind the desk asked when we stopped in front of her.
“I’m Levi Klein. I made a reservation yesterday afternoon for today through Monday morning.”
“Oh, yes. I have you right here. You requested the Hydrangea suite. I think you’ll both love it.” She handed something over for Levi to sign and then took us up the stairs. “This is our nicest suite,” she said as she opened the door.
The room was really beautiful, done in sage green, with a huge king-sized bed, a two person tub, and giant bathroom.
“Wow.” I walked around looking at everything while Levi spoke with Ellen. I heard the door close and I felt him walk up behind me.
“More?” he whispered.
“Yeah, more.” I turned to face him. “Are you ready for that?”
“Do you even have to ask?” The hunger in his eyes made me shiver.
“Okay then.” I didn’t know what else to say, and I hoped he wasn’t expecting to dive right in.
“Do you want to go and get some dinner?” he asked.
“I really do, yes.” I was thankful that he wasn’t pushing the subject further.
We walked hand in hand through Newport, window shopping and finally ending up at The Brick Alley Pub. I loved the energy and the décor; it was noisy and full of life.
We talked about anything and everything over our meal. I found that I was always learning new things about him.
“Did I ever tell you how Julian and I met?” he asked.
I shook my head. “I don’t think so.”
“I picked a fight with him in sixth grade. I was a surly preteen with something to prove. Julian was tall even back then. I was in a new school, and I wanted to make a name for myself.”
“What did Julian do?” I asked.
“Oh, he had no part of it. He told me I could hit him, but he wasn’t going to hit me back. Then asked me if I wanted to come to his house after school and play video games.”
I laughed. “That totally sounds like Julian. I assume you went to his house?”
“I did, and he punched me in the stomach.”
“What? Why would he do that?”
“Because I told him his sister was hot,” he said.
“You are such a jerk.”
“I know.” He grinned.
He told me more stories about him and his brothers when they were growing up, and how his mom had had to put up with all of them.
“Ready to head back?” he asked once we were done, rising to his feet and reaching for my hand.
“Yeah, thank you for dinner.” I looped my arm through his and hugged against his shoulder as we walked.
Ellen was in the living room reading a book when we came in. She waved as we headed for the stairs.
“Is it a little weird that this is, like, someone’s house?” I whispered.
“Yes, but not too bad, right?” He looked nervous that I would say I hated it.
“No, it’s not too weird. Stop worrying. This place is perfect, an
d so are you.” I kissed him as he was trying to open our door.
He maneuvered me so my back was against the door, his lips hungry for mine. I felt the door slide backward, but he caught me before I could fall. “You caught me.” I smiled at him.
“I’ll always catch you, Becca.”
I launched myself at him as soon as the door was closed and locked, tearing at his clothes. I wanted his skin against mine in a hurry. I pressed kisses to his chest, moving up his neck to his ear. “I love your body. I could look at you without a shirt on every day all day.”
He laughed. “Thanks. I feel the same way about you.”
I bit his bicep lightly. “You only have to ask.”
All of the humor left his eyes, and in its place was dark ferocity I had not seen before. He peeled off my shirt and gripped my hips, pressing me against him so he could devour me with his mouth. “More?” he whispered.
“More,” I answered, feeling sure about my decision.
He unbuttoned my jeans and slid them down my hips, leaving me in just a bra and panties. “You next?” I asked.
“I’m not wearing anything underneath these. I want you to be sure about this before we take this next step. There’s no turning back after this.”
“I’m sure.” I reached for his waistband with shaky fingers and slowly unbuttoned the top button, sliding the zipper down. He pushed my hand away and walked me backward toward the bed, his pants hanging dangerously low on his hips.
I stopped when my knees hit the mattress and reached behind myself to undo my bra, letting it fall to the floor next to us. My panties were next, joining my bra. He drew in a shaky breath and gazed down at me, his fingers brushing across my skin. “God, Becca, you are so beautiful.” He slipped his pants off and stood before me.
“I don’t know what to do after this part,” I whispered.
“Just lie back on the bed and let me love you.” His voice was hoarse.
I climbed up onto the bed and laid against the pillows. His lips were feather-light against my stomach, moving up until his hips were firmly against mine.
“Levi…” I gasped.
“Baby, I’ve got you.” He kissed me and shifted his hips until there was nothing left between us.
THE NEXT MORNING, I WOKE up to Levi, the human blanket, draped over me. After trying, unsuccessfully, to wiggle my way out from under him, I shoved him.
“Mmmm,” he groaned, but didn’t move.
“Levi, you are literally one million degrees.”
Instead of rolling off me, he snuggled in closer, kissing my neck. “How do you feel today? Any regrets?”
“No regrets. I’ve never been so sure of a decision in my life. I love you, and it was perfect. So much better than I had imagined.”
“I’m glad to hear you say that. I was worried you would wake up today and decide you made a huge mistake.” He kissed me. “Wait, what did you think it was going to be like?”
I blushed. “I don’t know. Girls always tell these horror stories about how awful their first time was. I was afraid it was going to hurt.”
“Well, for some girls, I imagine their first time does really suck. But, lucky for you, I’m not some inexperienced guy only looking to get his rocks off without caring about you at all.”
“Just how experienced are you?” I asked, arching a brow and rolling over onto my stomach.
“I didn’t just do drugs. I did everything. I’m not proud of it, believe me. I wish I could erase some, if not most, of the things I did back then.”
“I wasn’t trying to make you feel bad. I don't expect you to have been a saint before I came along.”
“You’re the first girl in a long time,” he said.
“How long?” I hated myself for asking. I didn’t want to hear him say her name.
“Not since high school.”
“So, you and Leah?”
“We never did much of anything.” He looked away.
“I don't blame you for dating someone else. We were broken up and you moved on. It’s okay.”
“No, it’s not. I should never have dated her. It wasn’t fair to her. I could only ever think of you. When your mom died, and Julian told me, I was with her. He had to physically stop me from getting on a plane to go to you.”
“When I saw him, I had secretly hoped you had come, too.”
“I really wanted to. But it wouldn't have been good for you if I had. We weren’t ready for each other yet.”
I knew he was right. I wasn’t ready for him then; I was barely ready for anything back then. “I’m glad we found our way back together.” I kissed him.
“Come on, get dressed; let’s go out for breakfast I don’t feel like sharing you with everyone else this morning.”
I watched him roll out of bed and saunter over to his bag. He grabbed some clothes out of it. I would never get over how hot he was, and I would never believe how lucky I had gotten with him.
We ate at the small pastry place we had passed the night before. He looked pensive as we ate our pastries.
“What’s up?” I asked.
“I’m... I just, I hate that I wasn't there when you needed me.”
“You’re here now, and I’ll always need you. You leaving me was good. I found myself, Levi, and I know that, no matter what, I’ll be okay. Sure, it took me a long time to do it, but I’m really okay, and I was okay before you came back to me. I realized that I loved you, and that it was all right for me to let you in, to let you love me, and to let myself love you back.”
“You are remarkable. You know that, right?” He grabbed my hand and brought it across the table to his lips.
“I’m fully in this. Every part of me loves you. I’m ready for you to catch me. I’m ready to jump.”
“To hear you say that... It was the only thing I wanted when we were apart.”
“Okay,” I said, “enough of the heavy stuff for today. Let’s enjoy the weekend and each other.”
“Deal.” He kissed my fingers once more before releasing my hand so I could finish eating.
We spent the whole afternoon walking around town, heading down to the pier to look at the boats in the harbor. “I really love it here. It’s so peaceful.” I sighed and leaned against him as we watched the sailboats.
“We should come here every couple of months if we can sneak away.”
“That sounds like heaven.” I reached back and kissed his cheek.
I let him take a zillion pictures of me. And we got people to take pictures of us together, my hair floating around us in the breeze.
“Are you two joining us for dinner and games tonight?” Ellen asked when we came in.
I looked at Levi. I didn’t want to say yes or no if he had other ideas.
“Yeah, we’ll be there,” he answered.
Once we were in our room, I kicked off my boots and socks and turned on the huge sunken tub, pouring in a copious amount of bubble bath. “So, dinner and games with strangers, huh?” I asked.
“It sounds like it could be kind of fun, don't you think?”
“Sure.” I grinned at him and pulled my shirt over my head. His eyes were riveted on me, and he watched me with an almost predatory look. My pants and underwear came off next and I slowly stepped into the tub.
“Is this a one person kind of bath for you?” He was already pulling off his clothes.
“No, please join me.” I leaned back in the tub and spread the bubbles over my body. I don't know why I was nervous about him being naked in the tub with me, but I was.
He slid into the other side and we both leaned back to relax and enjoy the warmth of the water. It wasn’t long, though, before his hands started to wander up my thigh.
“It’s that kind of bath, is it?” I giggled.
“Babe, with you naked in the tub with me, it’s always going to be that kind of bath.” He pulled me onto him, so I was straddling his hips. He kissed and sucked at every inch of skin in front of him. I was a pool of wax in his hands. I sucked in a brea
th as he slowly lowered me onto him, not stopping until I was fully seated on his lap. I threw my head back and let him lead me down this unknown path.
“More?” he whispered.
“Always more.”
The water was icy cold by the time we got out to dress for dinner. I shivered as I wrapped myself up in a robe. “I feel like I should take a shower now. Not sure how clean we got in that bath.” I grinned at him.
“Do you need me to wash your back?” he asked.
“You are insatiable. Haven’t you gotten your fill of me yet?”
He pulled me into his arms. “Never, Becca, I’ll never get my fill of you.” His lips were soft against mine.
We made it downstairs just as dinner was starting. There were three other couples plus Ellen at the table already. We were by far the youngest, but as dinner wore on, I could tell it was going to be a fun night.
Patty and Neil were an older couple from New Hampshire, celebrating their fiftieth wedding anniversary. James and Casey were the closest to our age, in their mid-twenties; they had been married for a few years. Greg and Paula were Levi’s parents’ age, and they were celebrating Greg’s birthday.
“If you all want to come into the family room, we can play some games.” Ellen smiled and stood up to lead the way. We played Scattergories, charades, and Monopoly in teams. It was a surprisingly fun evening.
“Now you be sure to call us the next time you have a show,” Patty told me at the end of the night.
“I promise I will.”
The rest of the trip flew by way too quickly, and I was not ready to head back to reality on Monday morning. “Did you have a good time?” Levi asked in the car on the way home.
“The best. Thank you for taking me away.” I leaned in and kissed his cheek.
Sadie and Julian were watching TV on the couch when we came in.
“Hey! How was your weekend?” She beamed at me.
“I’ll tell you later.” I winked at her and went straight back to the room to put my bag away. Before I could come back out, Sadie was coming in and shutting the door.
“Okay, spill it.”
The Harder I Fall Page 16
