"So why has he blocked me out, it doesn't make sense; he won't let me see anything?"
"Regan - I don't know dear, please just wait, I'm sure he won't be long."
That didn't reassure her. Ham had actively blocked her, of that she was sure and for whatever reason he wasn't allowing anything about the incoming visitor to be known; it didn't feel right.
A minute stretched to minutes with Regan's tension building and then she felt Marin's hands on her shoulders, gently massaging.
[I'm sure it's fine babe, relax and hang in there. Perhaps it's just another vessel from Gliese; when were you last there?]
[I don't think it can be that Marin, it's only a week since I last jumped through and everything was fine. We haven't had any trouble from Gliese for years and if only a trading ship had left there I'm sure I'd still know; it can't be that.] A silence hung there for a moment before Leah subbed in with a touch of excitement in her voice.
[Could it be the Transport then, the Saucer? Ham might finally be back from his travels.]
Regan shrugged doubtfully. [Maybe . . .] […but Ham and Hilary would know if it was, surely?]
She again turned to the gracious woman, suspicians growing in her mind by the second. [Hilary, I know you know something, you must, has there been any clear communication from that craft, anything at all?]
[Regan I really think we should . . .]
[Hilary! I'm not a child.] Regan reached up to stop Marin's massage and pushed her body upright while turning to glare at Hilary.
She looked extremely uncomfortable under the piercing gaze. [No, no of course you're not a child, but we don't have much, it's only a meaningless signal - I don't know it.]
[So you do have something - and the signal is?] Regan crossed her arms and waited.
Hilary's form seemed to shiver under the glare. [Well, all we have is a message . . . just, 'Ding Dong'… that's it Regan, honestly, it's all we've got; Ham's working on it now.]
There followed a few seconds of confused looks before Regan's demeanor changed completely. She stood, so quickly that she wobbled and needed one hand on the chair to steady herself. And then she began to tremble with excitement.
She had everyone's attention now and they all snapped alert.
"What's up babe? Do you know what that means?" Leah asked.
They watched as Regan shook her head slowly as if in disbelief and her eyes became distant as she stared blankly at the starscape on screen. Then she turned slowly to Leah and to Hilary and then Marin, still shaking her head before slumping into the chair.
"Guys, it is the Transport, it's the Saucer, I know it is - I just can't believe it. Ham is finally back."
"But how can you be sure of that Regan?" Hilary asked.
"The message Hilary, Ding Dong; it's two words from an old song, a really old song and its short for ding dong, the witch is dead." Just saying the words seemed to send a shiver through her and she dropped her head to her hands while continuing to shake it from side to side, all the time muttering. "I just can't believe it . . . I must have done it - I really did get the bitch."
"What in the stars are you talking about Regan?" Marin asked.
She steadied herself, looked up and grasped Marin's arm tightly, her face a mixture of guilt, relief and pride.
"Marin; all those years ago when the warships came after me from Cora, remember, while you were away in Gliese? Well as you know, your mother Beria came with them and she didn't just come after me, she was after Jared . . . and . . ." She choked, her voice trailing off nervously.
But she didn't get to continue as suddenly their attention was wrenched to the beautiful man who snapped upright in an action that caught them by surprise.
Ham turned slowly toward them before finishing Regan's sentence for her. ". . . And she did something really foolish Marin."
Normally everything about Ham's advanced android looked so natural no one would have especially noticed the eyes but today, as they flicked open on the word really, the effect proved chilling. He then grasped the arms of the chair aggressively and pushed himself upright to stand, before turning to confront Regan with a look that wasn't so much angry, as anguished.
"Yes Regan, it is my copy coming back with the STEIN Transport, after more than six years, I'm certain of it, but there is a problem." He looked frustrated and nervous. "That copy won't let me merge with him, and of course that worries me greatly. He - and of course that means, I . . . well, it seems I won't allow us to update, so I can't tell you anything yet."
Regan looked confused, no updating was unheard of. "But why won't he let you update, Ham?"
"I told you, I don't know!" and he suddenly sounded irritated - with her or the situation, Regan couldn't tell.
Marin had had enough and stalked to the front to face them directly, tired of being sidelined in the conversation. "Please you two, will you bring us up to date - what is it that Leah and I are missing here?"
Ham looked to Regan, pointedly waiting and under the force of his gaze she turned apologetically to her partners.
"Back then - " and she hesitated, searching for the right words, "Marin - I went after her, I went after Beria; I took an ADF without telling anyone, copied myself into it and went to take her down, out on the edge of the solar system. And - it seems, if I'm reading that ding dong message right, I succeeded, I must have destroyed her ship and she's dead."
Marin looked stunned. He stepped forward and took her hands, "But then why does this information seem a surprise to you, you would already know, wouldn't you? Okay, so you shot up her ship all those years ago and returned, but if you've known all this time, how come you didn't say anything before now?"
"Yes Regan," Ham joined in unhelpfully, "why didn't you say something before now?"
Regan screwed her nose up at him before turning back to Marin. "Babe, I didn't say anything earlier because I didn't actually know until now that she was dead, not for sure anyway. I couldn't know what happened back then . . . because I didn't exactly shoot her out of the vacuum."
"Then how . . ."
Regan seemed to slump guiltily, "Marin - my plan was to ram her, all right? Head on, at the fastest speed the ADF could reach; I guess I must have succeeded."
The implication of the words seemed to hit Leah first and her look of shock was obvious. "You mean you killed yourself to kill her, kamikaze like?"
Again Regan shrugged. "Well yeah, that was the likely outcome - but it was only a copy of me after all, and it was for Jared, for Marin and for me; I don't regret doing it."
At that Ham seemed to draw in a huge unneeded breath and then glared at her, with a confusing blend of anger and pained despair. "Well you might just regret it yet you stupid girl; you acted rashly on the assumption you would die!"
They all looked shocked at his choice of words; Ham simply didn't call Regan stupid, ever. He seemed to realize what he had said and held up a hand in apology before spinning away, distracted by something.
"Give me a moment, I'm talking to the Saucer now, it's just sub communication so far and he's definitely not ready to allow us to merge. I'm still not exactly clear why, but apparently they want to cruise in quietly and absorb all the changes in the solar system first."
Ham did not look happy at that prospect. "Guys I don't know whether we should agree, it's such a risk; we don't know what we're dealing with here after all and it's been six years; all kinds of changes might have taken place - changes in them, I mean."
"Them? Who are we talking about?" Leah asked, still confused at everything.
Again a light seemed to dawn in Regan and she cut across the discussion with a definite tone that cut off any further debate.
"Let them come in Ham - but quarantine them in terms of information exchange until you're one hundred percent happy. You're right, a lot has changed and . . . maybe they do just want to enjoy the discoveries firsthand rather than by merge and update. I can understand that, after all this time away who would want to be one thing one mo
ment, and then another the next while missing out on the excitement of discovery."
Regan stood for a few seconds longer, ignoring the concerned looks from Leah and Marin. Her demeanor radiated uncertainty but she didn't elaborate, instead turning away without another word and stalking from control toward the galley.
* * *
With permission from Hillary Station, the STEIN Transport cruised inward toward the huge ring they could see on screen, ignoring the three ADF hovering watchfully and occasionally darting here and there like jittery birds following the flight of a hawk.
This Regan, an avatar with hair still long, just as it had been when Ham found her far out in the reaches of the galaxy, looked on in amazement. She curled up on her chair while reaching back with one hand to nervously stroke the arm draped over her shoulders. The beautiful man hummed soothingly behind her as they drank in the image and marveled, adding it to the wonderful surprises experienced since reentering the solar system. Already they had passed a new, huge station in the outer asteroid belt with mining ships buzzing around like beetles collecting dung. And they diverted from a fast circular orbit of the sun to catch Saturn and gazed in awe at another large station they had detected there, this time on Titan with shuttles leaving and arriving almost in a train. And they registered the emergence of three large vessels all arriving on the old Gliese line and all within the last twenty four hours, hinting at some new regular trade between systems. Regan's excitement was increasing by the minute.
But this . . . this was a true surprise. The screen view looked out to a huge ring, several hundred meters across at least, and glowing around the rim. It gave the impression of being able to harness unbelievable energies and the station they could see off to one side was substantial. There had been no traffic to and from it but it had the look of permanence and purpose.
[What is it Ham, it looks sort of like a huge solenoid?]
[It does have that look of being designed to move something doesn't it?]
The beautiful man's avatar took on a thoughtful pose and then he moved to take the other command chair beside Regan.
[We need more information - I'll talk to him again.]
Regan looked uncertain. [Are we being stupid Ham? Maybe we should just merge and get it over with.]
[What, and miss all this excitement of discovery - no way - be patient babe, you're always in such a hurry. They've had six years to enjoy all these changes; you should enjoy some excitement too.]
And he was gone, she could sense it.
* * *
[We need to talk.] As one ham to another.
[Any time – anywhere.]
[It needs to be somewhere private.]
[We can talk out in vacuum, neither Regan . . . my Regan that is, or Hilary can monitor things, I've locked them out for the moment.]
And with that two figures emerged in space, like gods hovering there, identical twins and yet oh so different now, the separate experiences of six years having transformed them as they do for everyone. The ADFs drifted closer and the avatars each chose a wing then perched there, comically mirroring each other with semi thinker poses.
Saucer Ham gestured to the huge ring on his right. [We would like more information on the ring - this - this construction; it is so exciting. We'd just like to know what it is. And we will be ready to come in soon, don't worry about that, but more information to prepare ourselves would be good. We do just want to enjoy it for a while, not just absorb it while being absorbed.]
[You understand my caution, why I'm reluctant to just let you cruise in without knowing whether you're corrupted in some way?]
[Yes of course, but this is me, you know it is, and I'm telling you everything is all right, we just need time, you'll understand when you see her.]
The ADF Ham seemed to pause nervously; as if there was something he wanted to ask but was afraid to. He didn't need to.
Saucer Ham smiled knowingly. [I know what you're wondering and yes, it is Regan, she is with me, we found her in the end.]
The other beautiful man seemed to lose his composure for a second before looking up, the anxious look on his face impossible to hide. [And . . . ?] He asked.
[And . . . she held up, but it was close, very close. It has been a very difficult time for her, trapped in that digital space for so long alone.]
[We did the right thing then?]
[Yes we did, be sure of that, and I think if we manage it carefully we can make this return work, it's partly why I want to take our time coming in. It all helps her adjust, I think, and it will make it easier for . . . for your Regan - when they merge back together. But you need to prepare your Regan. Honestly, for her this will be like having someone feed their own private nightmare directly into her subconscious.]
[I will talk with her then, and explain things then get back to you, but it will take a few hours.]
[Of course, take all the time you need.]
They looked at each other across the short stretch of vacuum and shared a moment, an unspoken message of affirmation.
We have done well.
* * *
As lake waves lapped gently on the cyber beach Regan sat reflecting on the news of her 'others' return, allowing it to sink in. Her shock at the knowledge her 'other' had survived after being trapped in a nightmare for six years was mixed with guilt, and relief and fear, a swirling maelstrom of emotions. Hilary and Ham sat to either side of her and they exchanged concerned looks as they waited for her response. Ham's gaze drifted off across the lake to Panekiri, lost in his own thoughts.
"Do I really need to merge?" She suddenly asked.
Again Hilary and Ham exchanged looks.
"Why would you not merge dear?" Hilary sounded surprised and leaned forward to engage her.
"I was just thinking, I mean, if I could avoid that, you know, the bad stuff, it might be good don't you think?"
"Regan, this is a 'you' out there . . . in fact it is you, and they've been through hell because you chose it. These are the consequences of your actions and . . ."
"But wouldn't it be better not to have those memories, I mean, what might the memories do to me?"
Ham pulled his deck chair forward and turned it to face her, making sure she couldn't avoid his gaze. "Regan, I can't believe you're saying this, as Hilary said, this is you out there, and it is a 'you' that is hurting and needs to come home."
"I agree with Ham, Regan, there is no question you should do this." Hilary too shifted forward. "What's on your mind dear, this isn't like you at all."
Regan shifted uncomfortably under Hilary's gaze and she looked away across the lake, her eyes unfocused as she thought carefully before answering. "I know my pride and arrogance has caught up with me. I'm glad the witch is dead but I'm not proud about how I did it. I thought I was being smart, you know, miss tough girl, like I didn't need anyone else, but I didn't think about the consequences for me, or for you Ham." She turned to take his hands. "I'm so sorry, I guess I've suspected all along that was what you were doing out there, looking for the ADF. Even then somehow I've been pushing it from my mind. It never occurred to me that I would be trapped . . ."
He just looked at her, neutral, hard to read, and so she continued on.
"But it occurred to you Ham, didn't it, and you went after me, searching all that time on your own?" Regan shook her head choking up at the thought and then stood, shifting to kneel at his feet and she hugged him there, resting her head in his lap. "Thank you - you beautiful man."
He didn't reply, just stroked her head and exchanged another concerned look with Hilary, his thoughts very much on what was to come and what the rescued Regan would be like.
Suddenly, Regan pushed herself up and returned to her chair with a look of determination, more certain - more Regan.
"Let them come in their own time Ham, and yes, open the data flow up to them, but please don't merge with your other just yet. It would be good for them both to enjoy the new experiences as they cruise in; shit, so much has changed o
ver these years. And I don't want to merge with my 'other' until I've met with the 'you' who searched for me. We can do that here on Hilary, and he can download to your android, I want to personally thank him . . . you . . . you understand?"
He nodded and with that she knew the process would be underway instantly. Taking one more longing glance across the lake Regan reached for the hands of her two friends, squeezed them in thanks, and together they disappeared.
* * *
On the STEIN Transport, far out in the solar system, the returned travelers sat looking at the huge ring, awestruck. It wasn't so much its size or its appearance; it was the potential it spoke of.
"So it's a portal?" Regan perched forward on the control seat staring with fascination at the construction, three hundred meters in diameter and for the moment lifeless.
Ham winked at her. "That's what they're calling them, although I'm not sure that's a correct designation; it's a wormhole generator after all." He looked just as intrigued.
"Hmm, a wormhole going where do you think?"
"It seems this is the first portal on a route to Gliese, it's resting in a geostationary position relative to the sun and it's maintaining station just off the old first line we would have taken to get there in the past. But apparently it doesn't open anywhere near Gliese." He shook his head again in wonder at the sight. "It seems Aaron had to use a hit and miss approach, jumping through the first wormhole with fully automated ships using settings based on information provided from Bob. Then, where they came out they established a return ring or portal which also serves as a stable anchor point. Then they built a third ring, recalibrated and tried the process again. By trial and error they've established three fixed holes that bring us within weeks of Gliese as opposed to the two months it required before, and they're working on bringing that transit time down even further."
"So you were right Ham, that man is truly brilliant. I teased you back then I know but I could see it too. I must say though, he has excelled himself here."
Regan's Reach 4: Avarice Page 2
