It was a foreign concept for me, to think there was a possibility of getting more out of life than what I planned.
To live and not merely exist.
I wondered if I was capable of looking forward to the future and if I could learn not to dread it.
I wondered if I could smile again.
And for no other reason than because Lacey asked me, and I didn’t want to deny her.
I didn’t want to deny her anything, least of all any of her wishes. I wanted to be the one that made them come true.
How crazy was that?
About as crazy as thinking I can.
The door opened and Jack greeted me, tucking a cigarette behind his ear.
“You’re late,” he observed with a smile, moving aside allowing me room to walk inside the house.
“Shut up and be happy I came,” I mocked, brushing past him. “Where is everybody?”
“Dining room,” he said, kicking the door close. “Reina said dinner would be done in a half hour, it’s been a fucking hour,” he quipped, following me into the dining room. I stopped at the entryway and spotted Wolf, pulling the elastic band of his pants and snapping them back into place.
“You look ridiculous,” Pipe hissed.
“They’re my eating pants,” Wolf argued, diverting his eyes back to Jack who chuckled. Wolf pointed an accusing finger at him. “Laugh it up now, but when your jeans are digging into your gut, I’ll be the one laughing,” he said as he took a seat at the table and reached for the loaf of bread, tearing off a piece and handing it over to Pipe’s wife, Oksana.
“You need carbs, girl, or a fucking cow or something,” he quipped, shaking his head as he passed her the stick of butter. He turned to Pipe. “She’s all tits, man. You need to put meat on those bones, man needs something to hang on to when he’s motor boating those bad boys,” he advised.
I turned to Jack.
“How long you think we have until Pipe flips the table and knocks Wolf on his ass?” I questioned.
Jack wrapped an arm around my shoulders, leading me into the dining room before tipping his chin to the chair next to the head of the table.
“My money’s on Wolf,” he said, sitting down at the head of the table.
I took the seat beside him, stretching my arm across the chair next to me and glanced around the table. Wolf, Pipe, and Oksana took the three seats across from me. Jack was at one end and I’m assuming Reina would sit at the other, leaving one seat free.
“Where is everyone else?” I asked.
“Riggs ditched us for quality time with the baby mama,” Wolf informed.
“And now that Bones don’t have a wingman anymore he’s off looking for a wifey,” Pipe added.
“You can help him with that, no?” Jack asked as he cocked his head and eyed Oksana. “Didn’t you get her off a website?”
“Ukrainian Match.com,” the red head confirmed.
“I didn’t even know you knew how to use a computer,” I commented, lifting my eyes as the kitchen door swung open and Lacey held the door open for Reina.
“Dinner is served,” Reina exclaimed happily, carrying a huge tray in her hands. “I hope everyone’s hungry.”
Lacey turned around, clutching the salad bowl as our eyes locked.
I twisted uncomfortably in my seat but kept staring at her. I didn’t care that we were surrounded by people or that her father was right next to me. I couldn’t take my eyes off her and more than that, I wasn’t sure I wanted to.
The last time we were together in front of everyone I acted like a dick.
That wasn’t an option, but neither was pulling her onto my lap and wrapping my arms around her.
Reina came up beside me and bent down to kiss my cheek.
“Glad you came,” she said before making her way to her seat.
“Thanks for this,” I mumbled, turning back to where Lacey had been standing but she had moved, placing the salad on the table before moving to the right of me.
She glanced at my arm still draped across the back of the chair. I moved it so she could pull out her chair and take a seat.
“Black,” Jack called, forcing me to look at him and take the tray of lasagna he offered.
I scooped some into my plate before turning to Lacey and holding the tray for her as she lifted the spatula and put a piece on her plate.
“Thank you,” she said, taking the tray and passing it over to Reina.
“Put your fork down, Wolf, I’m going to say a toast,” Jack commanded.
Wolf’s fork paused mid-air as he pinned Jack with an incredulous look.
“You’re fucking kidding me right?”
“Oh, I almost forgot!” Reina rose to her feet and disappeared into the kitchen a moment later she returned with a six pack of O’Toulle’s non-alcoholic beer.
I raised an eyebrow at Jack who shrugged his shoulders and gritted his teeth.
“Drink the damn shit,” he seethed.
Reina finished handing out the fake beer, and we all raised our bottles as Jack looked across the table at her.
“Got a lot to be thankful for— “
“Is he saying Grace?” Wolf whispered across Oksana to Pipe.
“Man, he doesn’t know how to pray,” Pipe mumbled.
“For fucks sake, really?” Jack ground out, raising his bottle again. “To Reina and Blackie,” he said.
“Aye!” Pipe chimed in.
“To Reina and Blackie,” Lace whispered beside me. I turned to her as her hand slid beneath the table and squeezed mine. I laced our fingers together as the pad of my thumb circled her palm.
“Cheers,” Wolf added, taking a gulp of the beer. He sloshed it around in his mouth before spitting it out. “Fuck, what is this?”
Reina grabbed a napkin and wiped the beer from her arm.
“And this is why we don’t have dinners,” Jack commented, leaning back in the chair, guzzling his fake beer.
Oksana spit the beer out and smiled.
“Cheers in America!”
“Baby, no, no, no,” Pipe cried, throwing his head into his hands.
“It’s how you do cheers in America, no?” Oksana questioned, drawing her eyebrows together in confusion as she pointed her thumb over her shoulder at Wolf. “Mr. Wolf does it,” she countered.
Lace snatched her hand away from mine, lifting it to cover her mouth as she laughed. The sound was intoxicating, and I was drawn to her like a moth to a flame. I felt my lips quirk slightly as she brought her free hand to her stomach and continued to laugh.
God, she was beautiful.
Really fucking beautiful.
I thought seeing her smile was the best but watching her laugh was even better.
Her head turned and her eyes widened as she stared at me.
“Is that a smile?” She whispered.
I winked at her before biting the inside of my cheek to keep from grinning fully. I peeled my eyes away from her and concentrated on the food in front of me, catching Jack’s suspicious stare from the corner of my eye.
“Oksana, what part of the Ukraine are you from?” Reina asked, clearing her throat as she stared across the table at Jack.
“The Ukraine is much big,” Oksana offered.
“Got yourself a real bright bulb there, Pipe,” Jack muttered.
“The food is delicious, Reina,” I said, swallowing. “I stand by my statement when I told you, you should wife her,” I told Jack.
“That’s the plan,” he said, looking back at her.
“Are you going to have a big wedding?” Lacey questioned.
“No, something simple,” Reina stated. “Right?” she asked Jack.
“Just tell me when and where, Sunshine, I’ll be there,” he said, winking at her.
A chime sounded beside me and Lace lifted her hips to pull her phone from her pocket. Her fingers worked ferociously on the tiny screen and continued to chime. Her teeth sank into her lower lip as she placed her phone on the table and continued eating, picking the
olives out of her salad and placing them onto a napkin.
I leaned over, snatched one of the olives from her napkin and popped it into my mouth before leaning against the back of my chair and stretching my arm over the back of hers. She glanced at me out of the corner of her eye, trying to hide her smile as she picked more olives and placing them into my dish.
“Riggs will be sorry he missed this, Prez. I vote we plan another one of these shindigs,” Pipe said, looking at Jack who was glaring at my dish.
I met Jack’s gaze.
“I expected Bianci to be here,” I said, stabbing an olive with my fork and popping it into my mouth.
“Did you tell him what those crazy Italians did when we were off saving his ass?” Wolf asked with his mouthful.
Jack ran his hand over his face, holding back a chuckle as he shook his head.
“His mother and Pastore’s wife turned the fucking clubhouse into a fucking trattoria,” Pipe chimed in.
“Oh come on, I thought that was nice,” Lacey argued as her phone went off three times in a row.
“You become a surgeon and forget to tell your old man?” Jack questioned, pointing his fork towards her phone. “What the hell is so urgent?”
Lacey lifted her eyes from the screen and met Jack’s gaze.
“Very funny,” she said sarcastically. “I have to go.”
“Where are you going?” I questioned.
“Where do you think you’re going?” Jack asked at the same time.
Lacey answered her father, turning her attention toward him.
“Noah is pledging a fraternity, and he asked me and Daniela to go to the party,” she explained, looking over her shoulder at Reina. “I’m sorry but I promised him before I knew about the dinner.”
“They’ll be plenty more dinners,” Reina promised.
“Daniela’s outside, so I’m just going to run upstairs and change quick,” she said, pushing back her chair and grabbing her plate. She moved behind me but stopped in her tracks, leaning over my shoulder and stretching her arm out as her breasts brushed against me and she snatched her phone off the table.
“Sorry,” she whispered.
Little tease.
I watched as she stopped in front of Jack, bent down and kissed his cheek. I’m not going to lie…I was jealous as fuck and to prove it, a grunt escaped my lips.
“You’re fucked,” Pipe said, causing me to turn my attention towards him but lucky for me he was eyeing Jack.
“How so?”
“Are you serious?” Pipe scoffed.
“The idiot’s right, you’re fucked,” Wolf put his two cents in. “Got a boy who pledged a frat two years ago…them little fuckers get down, make our patch parties look like choir practice with a bunch of nuns,” he said pointedly.
I was losing my mind.
First, I was jealous of the peck Lace gave her father.
Then she mentioned this Noah character, add Wolf’s little comments, and I was the one who was fucked...not Jack.
I had to rely on him to reign her in, tie her to a chair and tell her she couldn’t fucking go to some frat house because if I said something, Jack would likely tie me to the fucking chair and stick a gun in my mouth.
Man, if he only knew what the fuck I was thinking.
I’d be dead.
“You have a son old enough to be in college?” Reina asked.
“Yeah, smart as a whip that boy is. It’s no wonder because his mother is dumb as bag of rocks,” he quipped, shoveling more lasagna onto his plate.
“So you going to let her go?” Pipe questioned, surprised.
“Why wouldn’t I? In nineteen years she hasn’t given me a problem,” he shrugged his shoulders, diverting his gaze back to mine. “Be good for her to get out, be around people her own age. Especially, after this shit that went down, the girl needs a little fun in her life.”
I don’t know if he was looking at me, daring me to disagree with him or if he was doing it to torment me.
Either way, Jack was fucking with me and I didn’t like it.
“I need to use the john,” I said, rising from my seat and making my way through the house, as Lacey came down the stairs. She had changed into a black tank top and a pair of pants that looked like leather. I looked to the bathroom door in the hallway next to the stairs, pulled open it open, before checking to see if everyone was still at the table then I pushed her into the bathroom and closed the door.
“Nice outfit,” I growled.
She bit her lip, as she leaned against the door, peering up at me from the fringe of her lashes.
“I think so,” she murmured.
“Bet a lot of people will,” I affirmed, pressing my palm against the door, above her head as I leaned into her. “Girl, you looking to be noticed?”
She didn’t answer instead; her tongue took a swipe over her lip. I brought my free hand to her hip, pulling her hips against me and forced her to arch her back against the door. I leaned forward, nuzzled her ear as my fingers dug into her hip.
God, I wanted her.
I was thinking about taking her again.
And again.
Because the next time would be slow, making up for the first time but after that, after I gave her the good she deserved, I’d free the beast and fucking devour her.
“Remember who saw you first, Lace,” I demanded, against her ear. “Remember who owns that part of you,” I ground out, sinking my teeth into her ear lobe.
“Blackie,” she rasped.
My hand traveled from her hip to the snap of her pants, skimming the waistband with my fingers before teasingly sliding them beneath the fabric.
“I want you to call me to pick you up,” I instructed, removing my hand from the door and pulling the elastic of her pants so my other hand could slide further into her pants and tease her pussy.
“Yes,” she panted, grinding against the palm of my hand.
“That’s my girl,” I growled, moving her panties to the side with one finger. “I can’t wait to get my mouth on that sweet cunt,” I said, running my finger up and down the seam of her pussy. “Make it real good for you, Lace…I promise.”
She whimpered as I leaned back and removed my hand from her pants. I lifted my hand between us, wrapping my mouth around the finger that teased her pussy, sucking the taste of her off before pulling it out of my mouth with a pop.
“Make it quick. I’ll be waiting,” I ordered, pressing my lips to hers briefly before reaching behind her and opening the door.
I left her in the bathroom, closed the door behind me and leaned against it before I blew out a ragged breath.
Decision made.
I was going for the rewrite.
Chapter Eighteen
I visited Christine’s grave every Saturday for the last month as a way to repay Blackie for always doing right by me. I knew it meant something to him, that it gave him purpose in a world where he thought he didn’t have any, and every week he missed a chance to bring her flowers was one week he thought less of himself.
The first time I brought the flowers I felt like I was doing something wrong, like I shouldn’t have been there and didn’t have the right. It’s kind of fucked up, visiting the grave of a woman who was married to the man you love. It’s not like they were divorced and fell out of love, they were a tragic love story, a modern day Romeo and Juliet, two people who loved one another but fell victim to corruption.
I know Blackie will always hold a certain love for her.
As he should.
That kind of love doesn’t die, it stays with you, guides you into eternity.
I want that kind of love.
The second visit I felt the same way but as I stared at her name I forced myself to remember the faint images my memory carried of the woman who made Blackie smile. It was my eleventh birthday and my father threw a party for me at the clubhouse. It was awkward being the biker princess when there weren’t any women in the clubhouse and the presents I got that year were just as stra
nge. Wolf bought me a catcher’s mitt and told me boys my age loved girls who played sports. Pipe, the poor bastard, he gave me a Barbie doll. Imagine? I decided I didn’t really want presents after that, and I anxiously waited for Blackie to arrive.
He finally showed up, but he wasn’t alone…Christine was with him and they looked so damn happy. I hated them both. Let me explain, I was an eleven-year-old girl, with a crush on a man, not a boy, and he was married to the prettiest girl I had ever seen. Prettier than my mom, prettier than my favorite actress. I realized then, even at that tender age when a girl notices boys, that Blackie only had eyes for her.
Of course they bought me the cool gift.
A caboodle full of lip gloss and nail polish.
Did I mention I hated them?
The third visit to Christine I talked to her. I told her the truth, confessed my feelings and then I apologized. I apologized for hating her when I was younger and for not getting to know her then. I told her I’d always regret not getting the chance to make a memory with her, something I could compare when Blackie took his trips down memory lane.
By the fourth visit, I knew he was being released and my time with Christine would come to a close. I asked her to watch over him and promised he’d return next week.
I never expected him to find me there.
If he went to the cemetery, found the flowers and wondered who brought them…I’d let him keep wondering.
But he not only saw me, he heard everything I said and for the first time I became his equal. Someone who could relate and understand. I took a chance, despite the doubt my maker tried to impart on me, hoping he wouldn’t turn a deaf ear to me and pleaded with him.
He didn’t argue or makes excuses.
He listened.
A spark of hope was ignited and even though I wanted to stay with him, never leave his side, I walked away and gave him his overdue visit with his smile keeper.
My dad and Reina were having everyone over for dinner, a celebration of sorts, thankful that that he survived. I was on pins and needles after I left the cemetery, worried about how he’d act in front of everyone and prayed he wouldn’t act like a world class jerk. I didn’t think my heart could take another blow, especially, not after sharing a tender moment and the softer side of the man clothed in leather.
Lethal Temptations (Tempted #5) Page 16
