by Nicole Casey
My colleagues further loosened her shackles. She was bent over at ninety degrees, J.P.’s cock in her mouth, my cock pounding her pussy, smacking against bone.
I dug my fingers into her sides, pounded, arched my head back and came.
Fuck, that feels great!
I was suddenly aware of the chilling air in the chamber. I put my robe back on and stepped away from her, giving my colleagues more room to maneuver.
My cravings satisfied, I leaned against the wall and watched my colleagues take turns groping her, whipping her, fucking her.
It was beautiful to behold the economy and the synchronicity of their movements. In addition to the afterglow of sex, I felt an odd sense of pride: pride in our teamwork and pride in the fact that I felt no jealousy watching the woman I cared deeply for being taken by the men I shared her with.
As she wore a mask, it was difficult, if not impossible, to get a sense of the facial expressions she was making. I approached her, put my hand to her cheek and lifted her head up to look at me.
Santiago was pounding her ass, but he stopped for a moment.
I leaned over and whispered in her ear, “Do you know the magic word?”
She was breathing heavily. She wet her lips and said, almost as if it were a question, “Please?”
I whispered in her ear, “The magic word is ‘stop’. You can say it, can’t you?”
She gritted her teeth and said defiantly, “Don’t fucking tell me what to say.”
I stepped back and motioned to Santiago to continue; and he did.
Though we had never done anything like this before—not together at least—it was as if we were experienced and well-rehearsed. I leaned against the wall and watched.
I felt my cock start to stiffen again.
I slipped off my robe and went to Gwen for more.
We carried Gwen up to the hot tubs on the second floor. No sooner had she got in than she was served a drink and offered trays of foods.
“Holly,” she said. “Where’s Holly?”
“What is she wearing?” J.P. asked.
“Fire.”
J.P., Elijah, Nolan and Travis set out to find Holly.
“We got separated hours ago,” said Gwen.
“Don’t worry,” I said. “They’ll find her. You just relax.”
Not much later, the search and rescue team came back with Holly and the three guys she was with. The hot tub was large, but it couldn’t fit us all. That was fine by me. I was comfortable lying on the cushions next to the window.
I glanced at the beautiful gardens below then I looked at the beautiful woman in the hot tub, my beautiful woman, our beautiful woman. Surrounded by the Montrose Triplets and reunited with her friend, she beamed and laughed.
She caught me staring at her. She winked at me and smiled. I smiled back then shut my eyes. Satiated and without a care in the world, I fell fast asleep.
The days following the masquerade ball, I couldn’t get Gwen out of my mind. I replayed, constantly, the scene of our orgy. Even during training exercises. Through the medium of Travis, I texted her frequently, sharing with her my most mundane or strange thoughts: a funny thing I’d heard, what I’d had for breakfast, an interesting thing she’d told me that I had been bouncing around my head.
“You must be getting sick of this,” I said to Travis, “sending Gwen text after text of all my trivial thoughts?”
“And it’s not just your texts,” he replied.
“Everybody’s doing the same?”
He nodded emphatically. “Everybody.”
“We might have to amend our ground rules,” I said. He didn’t agree, but he didn’t object.
At night, those of us who weren’t on duty, met at the apartment. We talked about how hard it was going to be when we were deployed, how much we were going to miss her.
“She’s not going to wait for us,” said Tristan.
“Sure she will,” said Taylor, but he didn’t sound convinced.
“We told her it would only be for six months,” said Manny.
I jumped out of my seat. “Why did you tell her that?!”
Manny raised his hands defensively. “Because that’s what I was told.”
“It’s an eight-month deployment,” I said. I was angry, but not at Manny. I was angry at our superiors who had changed our schedule at the eleventh hour. It wasn’t Manny’s fault, but still, we’d promised to be open and honest with Gwen. This didn’t make us look good.
As the days passed, I continued to fantasize about Gwen; I continued to replay in my mind the sex we’d had in the dungeon. But my fantasies and my reimagining of the masquerade ball were changing. No longer was I seeing Gwen and the squad, but I was seeing Gwen and me, alone. I closed my eyes, and Gwen was wrapped in strips of white and silver silk, shackled to the wall, and I was fucking her, but there was no one else in the dark chamber.
“We’re going down to The Bean Counter tomorrow afternoon,” said Manny. “You want to come with us?”
“I might,” I said. “It depends. I might see my sister if she’s free.”
It had been a few months since I last saw my sister, Alexa. Her work was keeping her busy, but Alexa made time. We met for lunch at the Marina.
“What’s going on?” she asked. “Are you nervous about the deployment?”
“In a way, yes. But…” I didn’t know where to begin.
“But?”
“A lot’s happened since I last saw you.”
“Yeah,” she said. “It’s been too long.” Then she turned her head slightly and asked in a lower voice, “Good things?”
I smiled. “Great things!”
She beamed. “Terrific! What’s her name?”
I laughed. “Gwen.”
“Gwen,” she repeated then she fluttered her eyebrows. “I’m all ears.”
I picked at the food on my plate—nervous habit. “Well, you know how the last time we talked, you told me about your rather unique relationship?”
“Yes.” She nodded with apprehension.
“And you know how the squad is really close-knit?”
“Yes.” Her eyes widened and she nodded with more apprehension.
“I need advice,” I said.
“Advice?” She cocked her head to the side then straightened. “My big brother is asking for advice.”
I took a bite of my food and swallowed.
“Why don’t you start by telling me about Gwen.”
That was a good place to start. The conversation flowed freely from there. I left out the details about the hotel room and the masquerade ball, focusing instead on the doubt and apprehension I was sensing from Gwen.
I was hoping that Alexa, without going into her own intimate details, could give me some insight into what Gwen might be going through, how she might be seeing things and what the squad could do to ease her fears.
Alexa kept going back to honesty and open communication.
“Of course,” I said, “but how am I supposed to tell her what’s going on if I don’t even know what’s going on myself?”
“Axel, being honest isn’t about telling her what’s going on—at least it’s not only about that. It’s about sharing your doubts and concerns, even if you don’t understand them yourself.”
I shook my head. “It’s complicated.” I looked around the dining room, which was mostly empty. Still, I leaned across the table and whispered, “I think I might be falling in love.”
Alexa didn’t respond straight away. After a while and a few bites of food, she said, “I think there’s a difference between loving somebody and falling in love.” she looked at me, perhaps expecting a reaction. I didn’t say anything; I listened.
“Falling in love,” she continued, “implies a kind of loss of control. That’s exciting, of course, but it’s potentially dangerous.”
“But loving somebody?” I asked.
“That’s about nurturing a deeply held respect for someone, caring about their concerns and their well-b
eing. At least that’s the way I see it.”
“I see what you mean,” I said. “I shouldn’t be worried about loving her, but maybe I should be careful not to fall in love with her. I think I might see the difference. Easier said than done.”
“True.”
I was impressed with my little sister, and I told her so. “You’re actually pretty wise.”
“Actually? You sound surprised.”
I shook my head. “I’m just surprised that I haven’t remarked on that sooner.”
“Awe.” She leaned over, put her hand on mine and squeezed.
“Alexa,” I said.
“Axel.”
“I know you’re busy with work and all,” I said. “But we have to see each other one more time before I’m deployed.”
She smiled and nodded. “I promise.”
“Thank you.”
“Does she know about your deployment?”
I nodded. “Eight months.”
“Eight?” She seemed surprised. “I thought it was six.”
“Yeah, but it changed.”
“Ouch. That is a long time.”
We ate in silence for a moment then I asked her, “Alexa, do you ever notice your guys getting jealous? I mean, are they competitive? Does one try to pull you away from the group?”
She thought about it a moment then shook her head. “No, I haven’t noticed. Have you?”
15
Nolan
Only two weeks until our deployment and I still didn’t have my photo of Gwen. She would have given me one if I’d asked, but I wasn’t ready yet. A photo is permanent—at least it should be. It’s a moment in time, a feeling, captured and preserved in something tangible, something you can hold onto that won’t slip through your fingers. If I had a photo of Gwen and I looked at it late at night while we were overseas, I would have to know that she was at home waiting for me, waiting for us. I didn’t have that confidence yet.
Things were going by so fast; our relationship was accelerating at such a pace, I didn’t have time to stop and consider just where it was going. I told Manny as much, but he just told me to relax, that I worry too much. I knew Manny well enough to spot his false bravado. He was just as worried as I was.
We’ve got two weeks to set everything straight, to turn what we’ve got from a fleeting adventure to something strong and lasting. Is two weeks enough time to do all that, to make sure she’s going to wait eight months for us to get back?
I’d planned on going down to The Bean Counter with Axel after lunch, but at the last minute Axel got another shift dumped on him. No one else was free, and if I didn’t go now, it would be days before I’d see her again: days during which my doubts would grow and eat away at me. So, I headed to The Bean Counter alone.
I’d never been alone with Gwen. Even though we’d established that going down to The Bean Counter was not against the rules, it still didn’t sit right with me. I had to remind myself that I wasn’t doing anything wrong, that I wasn’t being a traitor. The simple fact of telling myself that further increased my anxiety. That’s never a good sign when you have to tell yourself you’re not being a traitor.
While I jogged down to the cafe, I was reminded of the exchange I’d had with Travis a while back, how he’d told me to give it time, let things play out naturally. Under ideal circumstances, I might have agreed with him. But we had so much still to accomplish in such a short time. Gwen had expressed frustration when she had to wait a week to see us. Now we were asking her to wait eight months.
When I arrived at The Bean Counter, I didn’t see Gwen. The two girls working, one behind the counter, the other in the dining room, weren’t familiar to me. It was irrational of me, I knew it even at the time, but I felt a sudden and tremendous sense of loss. Gwen is gone, and I’ll never see her again.
I chastised myself for panicking for no reason. That’s not healthy, Nolan. Get it together.
I acted like a rational healthy-minded person and ordered a latte and a cinnamon roll then I asked the girl making my latte if Gwen was around.
“She’s in the kitchen,” she said.
“Would you do me a favor, please, and tell her that Nolan is here?”
“Sure.”
I thanked her and took a seat on the terrace. I chose the table farthest away from the front door, still I felt like all the customers were staring at me. When did I get so paranoid?
When Gwen walked onto the terrace, I stood from my seat. “Nolan!” She beamed and came to me with open arms.
I went to give her a hug, but she gave me a kiss. I didn’t resist. But when she pulled away, I glanced nervously around.
“Are you afraid your girlfriend might see you?”
“What?” I was confused; she was my girlfriend. I failed to pick up on the joke.
“Just kidding,” she said.
“Oh.” I scratched my head.
“Nolan, is everything OK?”
“I don’t know.”
She sat down then I did as well. “What’s going on?”
“I’m having a strange day,” I said.
“Strange?”
She set her hand on the table. I moved my chair closer to her. I took her hand, brought it under the table and held it. “That’s better,” I said.
She’d kicked off her shoe and now she brushed her foot up my leg, looked at me and smiled.
I felt her toes curl against my shin. I got hard real fast, and my erection pressed uncomfortably against my pants.
“Excuse me,” I said as I shifted in my seat and adjusted myself.
As I held her hand, her thumb rubbed back and forth along the side of my finger. She looked into my eyes and smiled.
I adjusted myself again and chuckled. “I shouldn’t wear such tight-fitting pants.”
She laughed. “Live and learn, right?”
I couldn’t help staring at her lips. She was so close; I only needed to lean over and embrace her.
“You look lost in thought,” she said.
I snapped myself from my reverie. “I was lost in your lips, actually.”
She curled her bottom lip and tilted her head. “And you’re not going to kiss them?”
I glanced nervously around me, again.
Gwen whispered. “Everybody’s watching us.”
I chuckled.
She leaned in. “Let them watch.”
I let go of her hand, grabbed her chin and pulled her close. I put my lips to hers. I kissed her bottom lip then her upper lip then both then the right side then the left.
She was not as patient as me, apparently. She put a hand on either side of my jaw, stopped my head from moving and kissed me long and hard.
My tongue met hers, turning and gliding and rubbing. Our lips parted, but I held on to her chin long enough to have my tongue trace the bottom of her lips. She pulled away and let out a heavy breath, as did I.
I touched the side of my face. I still felt her on me and my mouth continued moving slightly as if still engaged in a kiss. It was a dizzying sensation. I took in a deep breath and exhaled. “Intense,” I said.
Her hand touched my knee. “So, what’s this about having a strange day?”
I took a sip of my latte then wiped my mouth. “I don’t know. It’s hard to put into words.” I looked at her with pursed lips. “We’re being deployed.”
She frowned and nodded. “I know.”
“I miss you already,” I said.
She touched me on the cheek and then rested her hand on top of mine. But she didn’t say anything. She didn’t say, ‘But we’ll be together again. But I’ll wait for you.’ She only smiled and patted my hand.
“We’ll see each other before you go,” she said, somewhere between a question and a plea.
“I’d like that,” I said. I could tell from the expression on her face that that wasn’t the right thing to say. “Did I say something wrong?”
She cocked her head to the side. “Well, you just made it sound like it was more of a wish than
an eventuality.”
I nodded. “It is a wish. The future, it’s so—” I stopped myself. I didn’t know what I was saying. “We don’t have a lot of time before we leave. You understand, right? And we have to say goodbye to our families. It’s all..” I turned my hands over, palms up. “We just don’t have a lot of time”
She slid her hand off of mine. She slid her hands off the table and leaned back in her chair. “I understand. Of course.”
“But we’ll try,” I said. “I mean, I’d like that.”
She looked off toward the beach and said, “It’s only six months. Six months goes by fast.”
“Our deployment is for eight months.”
She snapped her head around to look at me with a furrowed brow. “Eight months?”
I nodded. “At least.”
“Oh.”
I was definitely saying all the wrong things. I thought again of the photograph I could be looking at while I was away, but I didn’t ask for one. Instead, I finished my latte and stood from my seat. “I have to get back to the base.”
She nodded. “Of course. I understand.”
I leaned over, kissed her on the cheek and began the long walk back.
16
Gwen
If I was their property, I was something akin to a rubber band: being pulled in and released, pulled in and released. When we were together, it was intense. When we were apart, we were very much apart, with long spells where I wouldn’t see them. They always had the same excuses: work or training. They were valid excuses, but that didn’t make it any less frustrating.
They were driving me crazy, and I, in turn, must have been driving Holly crazy with my worries and complaints. But I had good cause.
“Another text saying they can’t go out tonight.” I waved the phone at Holly as if she had been demanding proof.
“So girls night out, then?”
I frowned. “No offense, but I had other expectations.”
Holly scooched over on the couch. She patted the vacated seat. “Come here. Sit down with me.”
