by Alice Bello
I didn’t even ask why he was there.
Of course, he was there. No mystery there.
“What’s in the bag?” I did ask.
“Nothing,” he said coyly, “just some cheese sticks from Carly’s.”
I breathed out and focused on the bag.
“You really shouldn’t have,” I said as I took the bag from his hands.
There was a little moment that was just us staring at each other.
Okay, this was getting ridiculous. This was my first day on the job, and I was so hungry.
But he was standing there, all pretty and vulnerable and…
He broke eye contact first and shook his head. “Your stomach’s growling, you should eat.”
I couldn’t argue. I needed to eat.
We sat on the hood of my car as I dug into my food. Cheese sticks first, then two sandwiches and the bag of chips. I saved the third sandwich for later, I still had a break left.
“So how’s it going in there? Looks busy.”
I nodded, my mouth stuffed full of ham and turkey sandwich. “When it’s not super busy, then Jerry’s been showing me stuff.” I took a drink of my cherry soda. “Thank my lucky stars I’m getting a whole week’s training.”
“You’ll do great,” Benjamin said and stood up.
“Where are you going?” That came out a little needy.
He turned and those gorgeous blue eyes took me in. “I’ve got an estimate consultation at a house on the west side.”
I blinked. “How are you getting jobs so fast?”
“I printed some signs out before I left Durango. Plus there’s a fairly popular message board on Grayslakebuy-sell.com. I posted my ad there last week.”
Benjamin was a freaking boy scout. Ready for anything.
And just like that, he leaned in and kissed me. Not long, and not a peck on the lips. Just long enough to make my heart race and my mind go completely blank.
He tasted of peppermint and iced tea.
A moment later and he sauntered over to his truck, got in and rolled off into town.
“Ooh la la…” came Lauren’s voice from right behind me. I turned and found her giving me the eye. “That’s one hot hunk of man you’ve got there.”
A huge grin broke out on my face. He was one hot hunk of man.
But he wasn’t mine. He never would be.
My smile fell at that thought.
“Darlin’, whatever just passed through that brain of yours is probably the exact wrong thing to be thinking.”
I put down the rest of my sandwich and sighed, feeling suddenly beaten down. “I can’t help it. He’s… I…”
“If you’re going to say you’re not good enough for him or some other bat-shit crazy idea, you can just knock it off right now. He’s sexy and hot and all, but so are you, my nerdy little hungry girl.”
I looked at her and it just came out. “But I’m dying! Can’t you see it? My skin is so gray, I don’t know how much longer I have…” I sobbed, anger and fear ripping into me in equal measures. “I can’t be starting something with him when I’m not going to be here much longer.”
Lauren held up her hands and closed in on me. “Sweetie, what are you talking about?”
Tears were just streaming down my face. “I can’t shift. I haven’t shifted once since… since it happened. And every day my skin turns a little grayer.” I looked at her, feeling so ready to explode. “Don’t tell me you don’t see it!”
Lauren reached out and took hold of me by the shoulders. “Sweetie, I’m no doctor or anything, but you look just fine to me.”
What?
“You don’t have the dark circles under your eyes you had when I first met you, and because you’re a shifter you don’t even get zits anymore.”
What!?!?
I held my hand out and looked. Still gray, still ghostly pale. I held my arm next to hers.
“You don’t see that?”
“Sure I do,” she said, “you’ve got a better tan than I do.”
I shook my head. How couldn’t she see…
Oh no…
I wasn’t dying.
I was going insane.
“Sweetie, now calm down or you’re going to lose your lunch all over Jerry’s parking lot, and then you’ll have to clean it up.”
I laughed. This was utterly insane.
“Now listen to me. I’ll talk to my honey and his brother. Things are different here, so maybe you’re a different species or something.”
Different?
“I know plenty of shifters that don’t shift. But… well, just don’t stress about it too much. I’ll talk to Ty and some others and see what they think.”
She pulled a pack of to-go tissues from her pocket and started wiping the tears from my face. “Now let’s pull you back together so you can go back in there and not stress out poor Jerry any more than he is.”
I blew my nose—I always get snotty when I cry—and started to giggle.
Whether I was going crazy or not, I might not be dying.
I might not be dying!
I plucked the order pad from Lauren’s pocket and started writing.
“Here’s my cell phone number. Call me as soon as you find anything out.”
“Darlin’… most people would be kinda upset they were seeing things.”
I handed her the order pad back. “I can handle crazy. I can so handle being crazy!”
###
I arrived home to the smells of a beef roast. I was instantly salivating.
The front door was open and every step I took made the aroma of slow-roasted meat and potatoes and carrots all the more intense.
I heard the whirr of an electric mixer as I came into the kitchen, and there was Benjamin whipping mashed potatoes.
“You really know how to cook, don’t you?” I asked as I came up behind him and looked over into the pot of potatoes.
Mmm… they smelled so good.
He looked back at me and gave me the prettiest of smiles.
“My breakfast casserole didn’t cement my culinary rep?” he said, turning off the mixer.
I shrugged. “Novelty breakfast foods are one thing,” I dipped my finger down into the pot and stole a taste of the whipped potatoes.
A touch of garlic, butter, and pepper.
Delicious.
“But this…” I pointed at the potatoes. “This is art.”
“Wait till you get my meat in your mouth.”
My eyes bugged out as what he’d said registered on his face.
“That sounded a lot different in my head.”
I busted out laughing.
“What I meant was wait until you taste the beef roast I’m fixing.”
I was slumped over the counter by the sink, trying to calm myself.
“Sure you did,” and the way I said that wasn’t a bit filled with innuendo.
I turned and he was standing there by the stove, mixer still in his hands, a cute little daisy print apron tied around his hips.
He looked abashed and totally adorable.
I was on the verge of trying to say something back, something funny and maybe flirty—but I was still iffy about what Lauren had told me before.
“Do I…” my mouth went dry just trying to get it out. “Do I look gray to you?”
Benjamin scowled. “Gray how?”
I swallowed and almost begged off… but I needed to know what he saw.
“Does my skin look gray to you?”
He smiled and shook his head, “You look just fine to me. Like peaches and cream.”
Oh…
The way he said that it made my knees wobble a little.
He gave his head a little shake and looked away from me.
But only for a moment.
Which was good. I loved having him looking at me.
“I know you might be worried about all the car exhaust and other stuff you might inhale at the gas station, but besides being stinky, it won’t hurt you. You’re a shifter and
we aren’t vulnerable to that stuff.”
He didn’t see the gray.
So I was crazy.
But not dying… probably not.
Just crazy.
I could live with that.
Especially if it gave me time with Benjamin.
“When’s dinner? I worked up an appetite.”
###
The beef roast was amazing. Perfectly seasoned and cook just the way I never knew I liked my meat: well done on the outside, a little pink on the inside.
I really was becoming a wolf.
We ate, we did dishes, and then we went out and took a walk through the woods. There was a small pond about a mile away. I made a mental note about it for later on.
I’d always wanted to swim in something other than a public swimming pool.
I also wanted to see Benjamin naked and wet.
I’m sure I blushed just thinking that.
I hoped he couldn’t smell anything, though. I’d die if he could smell arousal on me.
After all, I was still a virgin.
I also made a mental note to look up the perils of sex in water.
###
It was nice, sitting on the swing on that big old front porch. I was leaning against Benjamin, not thinking at all, just breathing him in, and the lovely jasmine laced breeze.
He had his arm around me, but let me do all the leaning in.
I don’t know how the man could be so patient.
He’d been nursing me back to health for months, and until today we’d never even kissed.
We just sat there, leaning against each other, in the dark, not even the porch light on.
“So,” he said after nearly two hours of not saying a word. “How was your day?”
I laughed. It was just so funny.
“Not bad.”
He was smiling. I could tell.
“You think you’re going to want to go back tomorrow?”
I looked up at him. “That’s the plan.”
“No anxiety attacks?”
I thought about that. I’d been nervous, sure. But nothing like when I’d tried to wait tables at Stormy’s place. Being here, for some reason, was just so much easier.
“I’m good.”
“Good,” he said, nodding gravely. “Don’t want to be seen with a jobless no-account slacker type.”
I sat up and gave him a hard look. “Slacker?”
He really laid on the aw-shucks look.
“You did do a pretty good impersonation of one.”
I smiled and slowly leaned in as if I was going to kiss him.
But then I reached in and grabbed hold of a good bit of his stomach.
He squirmed and tried to get away, but I had a good hold on him, and I had shifter strength too.
We fell off the porch swing, and I landed on top of him on the wooden floor of the porch.
I was laughing, and so was he. But then we looked into each other’s eyes, our faces so close, and our bodies connected.
It felt right to be so close to him.
I let my face fall toward his and kissed him so lightly. It was like taking tiny sips of life itself, each little kiss giving me more and more strength.
We kissed and kissed and kissed. I don’t even know for how long. Crickets serenaded us, and the wind through the trees played harmony.
Finally, Benjamin rolled us over and put some distance between us.
And I knew why.
I wasn’t ready to go any further. Not really.
He always seemed to know what I needed, and what I was ready for.
“You need to get some sleep,” he said and caressed a lock of my hair back behind my ear.
“You’re right,” I said, and then dragged myself self up off of the floor. I stretched and then looked down at him, holding out my hand. “Let’s get on that.”
He looked skeptical. So I leaned over and took him by the hand.
It was as if I had absolute power over him. All I had to do was give the slightest pull or tug, and he moved exactly where I wanted him.
I led him into the house, up the stairs and down the hall to my room.
When I opened my bedroom door he shook his head. “You’re not ready.”
“No, I’m not ready for that. But I don’t want to sleep another night without you.”
And that was all the argument I had to make.
Benjamin followed me into my room, waited on the edge of the bed, his back to me, while I changed into a nightshirt, and then he took off his shirt and lay down beside me.
I pressed my hand to his chest and felt his heart pounding slowly and steadily.
My Benjamin.
He was all mine as if he always had been.
And always would be.
Chapter 8
The next morning I woke feeling like… well, better than I had since before I was bitten. Maybe better than I’d ever felt in my whole life.
Benjamin was gone, leaving a note saying he had a morning full of estimates and a gutter repair out on Ole Antangy Road, wherever that was. “Your lunch is in the icebox.”
I smiled at the old-fashioned word choice.
I pulled his pillow to my face and inhaled deeply. It was as if I was in heaven, enveloped in his scent, submerged in thoughts and feelings that only had to do with him.
When I finally forced myself to emerge from this Benjamin reverie I looked at my hand again.
Still looked pretty darn gray to me.
Just then my phone started to ring. I reached over and looked at the display. It was Lauren.
I felt excited and terrified at the same time.
“Lauren?”
“Who else, hungry girl?”
I smiled. “So what did they say?”
“Well, my love muffin, Van, doesn’t know much at all about other strains of the shifter. He’s more of a lover and a fighter than a deep thinker or research guy. But our clan alpha, Ty said he didn’t see or smell anything wrong with you the other day when you two met at my lunch counter. His mate, Mia has a ton of shifter blood in her, but she has never shifted.”
“Oh…”
“But then again, their strain of shifter can’t be passed on by a simple bite. So…”
My stomach dropped. “So they don’t have any idea about me.”
“Afraid so, darlin’. But that’s no biggie. Ty said there could be all kinds of reasons for it. The most important thing is not to stress or dwell on it… better to not even think about it.”
“And he doesn’t know why I’m seeing gray in my skin?”
She sighed. “He thought that was more of a mystical thing. Maybe there’s something special about you.”
Special?
Sure, I feel real special.
“I mean it. Don’t go worrying about it. It’s like suffering through it all twice.”
I shook my head at that simple though seriously true reasoning.
“Well, I’ve got to get to work to start my shift.”
“Thanks, Lauren. And thank you so much for getting me that job at Jerry’s. He’s a pretty nice guy.”
“Don’t mention it. Just make sure you come in and see me once in a while. I know you love the food.”
“I do, and I will.”
I tapped off my phone and lay there in my nice warm, Benjamin smelling sheets for a while.
No one knew what was going on with me. Not Stormy or Roxy or Benjamin, and not the shifters here in Grayslake.
But here I was, a shifter, a former college student, and I was in love with the best man I knew.
I closed my eyes and savored that wondrous thought.
I was in love.
If nobody knew what was happening to me, then how could I know?
That meant… what?
That I didn’t know if I was dying or not.
I felt fine.
Heck, I felt great. Strong, fast and my senses were off the charts.
I got up out of bed and padded to the restroom. After I brushed my
teeth and took a long hot shower, I pulled my hair back in a ponytail again, pulled on some comfortable clothes and headed downstairs to scrounge up something for breakfast.
I didn’t have to look very far. There was a heaping plate of waffles, sausage, and eggs waiting for me.
Benjamin always thought of everything.
###
Work was better today. I was thinking clearer. The computer screens were making more sense. And I was smiling at people as I made change for them, or ran their cards for them. I was proficient enough Jerry went in the back for short stretches to deal with delivery trucks and the occasional vendors. He’d bring those vendors and truck drivers up to meet me, so I’d know them next week when I was doing the job on my own.
Benjamin was leaning against my car again when I took my lunch. He gave me the sweetest, sexiest smile. I walked up to him, set my bagged lunch on the hood of my car and then threw my arms around his neck.
Kissing Benjamin was so good. His lips were so soft and warm, he tasted utterly delicious, smelled amazing… but it was the little whimpering sounds he made when I pressed my advantage that really revved my engine.
It was like he was helpless against my charms…
I had never even thought I had charms.
But, well, the way he felt against me, and the way he pulled me further into that kiss…
I had some charm in me.
When I pulled away from him and looked up at him, he was panting and flushed.
Just like I wanted him.
“You know, Chelsea… you’re starting to tie me up in knots.”
I chuckled. Tying him up in knots sounded pretty good.
“Wait until I…” Wait until I tie you to my bed.
Oh, my goodness…
I couldn’t believe I almost said that!
“Wait until you what?” he asked.
I think from the smoldering look on his face that he knew exactly what I was about to say.
I hid my face in his broad, t-shirt clad chest and felt my face start burning.
“What was that?”
“Nothing!” I exclaimed, pushing away from him and trying to will my face to stop blushing. “Nothing at all.”
He pulled a paper bag from behind his back. “Thought you’d like these.”
I plucked the bag from his fingers. “Cheese sticks?”
