by Sabre Rose
I scrolled down until I reached the final comment. It simply read, “She’s a bit chubby, isn’t she?” with a response of, “I wouldn’t kick her out of bed.”
“Who wrote this?” I asked, trying not to let the tightness in my throat slip into my voice. The article was posted on a blog which only identified the author as E. Blaire.
“I’ve got no idea but I intend on finding out.” Tyler stepped closer and I resisted the urge to lean into him and inhale his scent. His hand drifted in the space between us, the threads of his neck flexing as he worked his jaw back and forth. Dark eyes skimmed over my body before coming back to rest on my eyes. They were filled with lust and desire and it gave me the strength to straighten my shoulders and lift my chin.
“Thank you for telling me.”
Tyler snorted. “That’s all I get? Thank you for telling me?” He stepped closer again, his mouth dangerously close to mine.
“Did you expect more?”
“Lauren,” he growled and the heat of his breath brushed against my skin.
I closed my eyes as the memories of all the times he had said my name like that crashed over me. Steeling myself, I forced my eyes back open and smiled. “I should be getting back to Sadie. We’ve got networking to do.” Turning on my heel, I walked away.
“Lauren,” he called again, but I gritted my teeth, resisting the urge to turn back, and walked into the room, losing myself in the crowd of people.
* * *
Seeing him again addled my brain.
I was intoxicated by him.
Drunk on the memory of him.
If I had been strong, I wouldn’t have spent the evening flicking through the photos I took of him. I wouldn’t have let my mind wander back to that day in his office and my bold and brazen behaviour. My body wouldn’t have quivered and trembled at the memory of later that night.
But I was not strong.
* * *
The next evening, I sat on the couch with Sadie, reading and rereading the article over and over, looking for hints of who had spilt my secrets. I stared at the images of me. None of them flattering. All of them true. They had managed to pick me out from the group of people gathered around the two brothers as they fought on the floor of the bar. The image perfectly reflected the look of horror on my face.
“Ignore it,” Sadie said, digging a spoon into a tub of ice-cream.
“All very well for you to say. It’s not your face splashed across the media.”
“I would hardly call one little article ‘the media’.” Sadie rolled her eyes and sucked on the tip of the spoon before tilting it towards me. “Want some?”
I shook my head as someone pounded on the door.
Sadie lifted her brows. “I’m telling Tyler if it’s Gabe.”
“It’s not Gabe,” I said, pulling myself up from the couch.
“It could be,” she replied.
“It’s not.”
I pulled the door open to be greeted by Billie. “You are here,” she said in a tone that implied I’d been ignoring her.
“Hey, Billie.” I opened the door wider and ushered her in.
“Don’t you ‘hey’ me,” she replied, heels clipping over the wooden floor. She stopped halfway down the narrow space, peering into the bedrooms and shaking her head before continuing to walk into the lounge.
“I expected more of you, Lauren Greer.” Billie plonked herself down into a spare chair. “Here I am, basically a widow, and you haven’t even come to check how I’m doing? What if I was an inconsolable mess? What if I needed help with Oliver? I was counting on you in my testosterone-filled world, and you let me down.”
Sadie whistled as I sat back beside her. “Not good, L,” she said, having chosen to adopt the nickname my sister used. She shook her head. “Not good.”
“I’m sorry,” I offered, more of a question than a true apology. It had honestly never occurred to me to visit Billie. I was certain that I would be on the outs with both her and Hamish after having messed—Hamish’s word, not mine—with both men.
“No need to be sorry. I’ve come up with a way you can make it up to me.”
“You have?”
Billie rolled her eyes dramatically. “Do you actually have anything to add to this conversation or are you just going to sit there and offer pithy comments and terse replies?”
Sadie elbowed me. “Yeah, L. Is that all you’re going to do?”
Without waiting for a reply, Billie adjusted the way her shirt bunched over her breasts and sighed. “You know that Hamish’s time at the resort is coming to an end next weekend.”
“Resort?” I questioned and Sadie elbowed me again. “I do,” I said more firmly, even though I didn’t know. Hamish Thornton’s schedule was not on my mind. Ever.
“You do,” Billie confirmed. “Well, the entire family is to attend a weekend at this lodge. An adventure therapy weekend.”
“Adventure therapy?” I repeated.
“It’s where you complete various adventure-themed tasks as a group in order to bring you closer and help work through any issues,” she said, as though reading off the back of a brochure.
“Sounds delightful.” I still wasn’t sure what this had to do with me, but I was beginning to suspect. Billie wanted me to babysit Oliver, and I couldn’t think of anything I’d like less. I needed to distance myself from the Thornton family, not become the youngest son’s babysitter.
“Hillis said it will be good for the family,” Billie said firmly.
“Hillis?” Sadie asked and it was my turn to elbow her. We didn’t need to encourage Billie by requesting details.
“My therapist. I needed one after all the shit I’ve been through. He’s the one that runs these weekends and he said it would be perfect for our situation. So we leave at six o’clock on Friday evening. Be ready.”
I looked at her questioningly. “Ready to…?”
She frowned. Well, attempted to, anyway. Her eyebrows bunched but the skin around them did nothing of the sort. “To come, of course. Hillis thinks it’s important that you are there since you are so involved in our current family issues.”
I shook my head before I even started to answer. “I’m not going.”
“Yes, you are,” Billie shot back.
“No,” I replied firmly. “I am not.”
“You owe me,” Billie attempted to raise her overly manicured brows.
“I owe you?”
Sadie could barely contain her grin. “Come on now, L. She’s got a point. You clearly owe the woman.”
“What fucking point?” I said, struggling to keep my annoyance at bay.
Billie threw her hands into the air. “You just answered your own question.”
Getting to her feet, Billie walked towards the hallway, as I looked over at Sadie who just grinned back at me stupidly.
“I told the sitter I’d be home hours ago. Remember,” she threw over her shoulder, “we’ll be here six o’clock Friday to pick you up.” She shut the door behind her.
“What just happened?” I asked, turning to Sadie.
Sadie dipped the spoon into the ice-cream and sucked the contents off loudly. “You heard the woman. You’re going on an adventure therapy weekend with the Thorntons. I almost wish I was going too, just to see how uncomfortable it’s going to be.” Her eyes twinkled. “You’re going to have so much fun!”
6
LAUREN
Squished beside Billie, I rested my head against the glass and stared out the window at the blurred scenery, asking myself how I ended up here. Billie obviously hadn’t told any of the others that I’d be coming on this awful trip, judging from the looks of surprise when I climbed into the van. No one said anything, though. They looked about as happy as I was about my inclusion.
Since Hamish sat in the front seat beside the therapist/driver, I had the option of sitting between Gabe and Tyler, or climb over Jake and Billie to sit next to the window. The choice was simple.
Hillis, Billie’s therapist
, looked nothing like I imagined a therapist. Instead, he reminded me of the outdoor instructors we had on school camps. Dressed in cargo pants, a light t-shirt and a cap, he chatted from the driver’s seat, intentionally or unintentionally unaware of the discomfort surrounding him. His jokes met silence from everyone apart from Billie and Hamish who were going overboard in an attempt to find him funny.
Hamish appeared different after his time spent in rehab. More open, more interested in Billie but at the same time, less sure of himself.
The drive took about an hour and a half and only Billie, Hamish and Hillis spoke. Finally pulling up in a gravelled carpark, the van stopped and I was grateful to stretch my legs, doing my best to avoid both Tyler’s and Gabe’s gaze.
“Welcome to Camp Hillis.” The therapist smiled broadly. “Yes, I named the camp after myself. No, it isn’t really called Camp Hillis. That only happens when I’m running the show.” He paused, waiting for the laughter that Billie and Hamish gave. Taking off his cap, Hillis called us to form a circle around him. “First, the rules. No cell phones.”
“Excuse me?” Tyler spluttered.
“You’re excused.” Hillis grinned, shoving his cap towards Tyler. “Cell phone.” When Tyler refused, Hillis rolled his eyes. “There is no reception, and no data available out here anyway.”
“Then there is no reason for me to hand my phone in,” Tyler growled.
“For fuck’s sake Tyler, it’s just a phone.” Gabe pulled his from his pocket and placed it in the bowl of the cap.
“Thank you,” Hillis said exaggeratedly. He shoved the cap in Tyler’s direction again but Tyler shook his head. The rest of us put our phones into the cap. All except Jake. He didn’t bring one. In fact, I wasn’t even sure if he owned one.
“Now, as I suspect Billie would have explained to you, this weekend is to help you all with your relationships and dependency on alcohol and drugs as coping mechanisms. I’m looking at you, Gabe.” Hillis gave him a stern glare as Gabe smiled innocently and held up his hands. “And also to help you re-connect as human beings.”
Leaning closer to me, Gabe whispered, “Just shoot me now.”
“So,” Hillis continued. “Back to the rules. There is to be no drinking, no drugs, and no communication with the outside world. During your time here you will refrain from any conversation which brings tension or attention to the relationship issues you are currently facing. Nothing between fathers and sons. Husbands and wives. Girlfriend and boyfriends. Exes.” He looked pointedly at me. “And nothing between brothers. If a conversation does come up, you are to stop it immediately. This weekend is to develop relationships first and deal with issues at a later date.”
“Doesn’t that kind of defeat the therapy part of this weekend?” Gabe whispered.
I took a step away.
“You will be eating together, completing activities together and even sleeping together.”
Gabe looked over and wiggled his eyebrows. “I don’t have any objection to that.”
“So if everyone would gather their gear and follow me, I will show you the accommodation quarters.”
What I expected was a dorm room with single beds evenly lined against the wall. What we got was an empty room with mattresses and pillows laid in a circle, heads together, with handwritten name cards resting on each pillow.
“Go ahead, place your bag on the mattress with your name. This will be your bed for the first night here. Each sleeping arrangement has been made from understanding the family dynamics and placing people where they would benefit from the most growth.”
I wandered around the circle, looking for my name. Sure enough, there I was, wedged between Tyler and Gabe. Gabe looked at me and shrugged, a smirk stuck on his face. Tyler didn’t look at me and instead, threw his pack onto the mattress. Dressed in jeans and a t-shirt, he looked nothing like the calm and controlled businessman he usually came across as. His t-shirt was tight, emphasising the sculptured swells of the body beneath it. Despite telling myself not to, my eyes kept slipping to him, reminding me of all the times I had lifted his shirt over his head, exposing the chiselled chest below. Of all the times I had pressed my lips to his chest. Of all the times I had run my tongue over his flesh.
“Isn’t this exciting?” Billie chirped, interrupting my thoughts. “It will be like we’re all kids again, sleeping on the floor during a sleepover. I haven’t done that in years!” She clapped her hands together.
“See?” Hillis said. “Billie’s got the right attitude. The only way you are going to get something out of the weekend is if you put the effort in with the right attitude. Billie and Hamish have that attitude and since the rest of you agreed to come along, I suggest you start by adjusting yours to follow suit.”
“There is some debate on the agreeing part,” I muttered.
“I don’t even know why I’m here,” Jake said, throwing his bag to the floor and then flopping onto the mattress. “I don’t have issues with anyone.”
“But you do have issues,” Gabe teased.
“None that can be solved by singing around a campfire.”
Hillis looked over at Billie sharply. “I told you not to tell them any of the activities.”
“I didn’t!” Billie exclaimed, her eyes growing wide.
“Shit,” Jake cursed. “We’re seriously going to sing songs around a campfire?”
“Is there a local taxi service available?” Tyler asked.
“Of course not,” Hillis replied impatiently, taking Tyler’s question more seriously than intended. “Now that the surprise has been ruined, if you would all meet me outside for our first night, we will be cooking sausages for dinner over the campfire.”
Billie frowned. “I don’t eat meat.”
“Since when?” Hamish asked.
“Since I decided not to,” Billie replied, somewhat aggressively. “Most likely when I was left alone while you were in rehab from drunk driving your car into the front of the casino.”
“Lead the way,” Jake said to Hillis, rubbing his hands together. “Let’s get this over and done with.”
Of all the things I imagined myself doing with the Thornton family, sitting around a campfire eating half-cooked sausages off a stick was not one of them. Billie and Hillis led the conversation, talking about frivolous things that no one else was interested in since topics of any depth were strictly off limits. Hillis told us of the activities we could expect over the weekend. First on the agenda for the next day was rock climbing. Apparently, trust issues would be dealt with during this exercise as we would be responsible for belaying each other as we climbed. A nauseated knot began to twist in my stomach. Although I had never had a problem with heights before, the thought of dangling from a rope wasn't appealing. After the rock climbing was complete, we would eat lunch and then head off on a silent trek to a campsite where we would spend the night in tents under the stars. I failed to see how any of this would help, but Hillis assured us that he had completed many of these activity therapy weekends with many families, and they always ended with a positive outcome. What he considered a positive outcome was never discussed.
After we ate black and pink sausages, Hillis got out his guitar, but after two failed attempts to get everyone to join in, he excused us for the rest of the evening with a resigned, but not defeated look on his face. On our tour of the facilities earlier, we had been shown a heated rock pool in a man-made cave just down a grassy hill. Making sure everyone else was occupied, I slipped on my bathing suit and headed down the path with a towel securely wrapped around me.
I needed to be alone.
I needed for Billie’s voice not to be sounding in my ear, Gabe’s eyes not to follow my every move, and for Tyler’s avoidance to stop playing over and over in my mind. He had not uttered one word to me, and although I had caught his eye a couple of times, he looked away quickly as if determined to show me he didn’t care if I was here or not.
Steam floated out from the cave to greet me. I had to duck my head, but onc
e I was inside, the cave opened up into a small room with seating around the water's edge so you could sit with just your feet dipped in or submerge yourself completely. Lights recessed into the ceiling reflected on the water. Unwrapping the towel, I sunk into the liquid warmth, sighing when I lowered to my shoulders, letting my head fall back on the edge of the pool. It was exhausting just being around these people. Hamish mainly avoided me, but a small frown appeared in the lines between his brows anytime he was confronted with my presence. Gabe vied for my attention. Jake didn’t care. Billie’s voice had reached a level of shrillness unheard before in her efforts to convince herself this was a good idea, and Tyler’s refusal to even look at me affected me more than I cared to admit.
With steam coating my lungs and heat caressing my body, I was in a state halfway between awake and asleep when I heard a throat clear.
“I didn’t think anyone was here.”
Tyler stood at the entrance to the cave, a towel wrapped around his waist, the rest of him unclothed. I swallowed the wave of desire that overwhelmed me at his appearance and nodded.
“Don’t let me stop you,” I said, impressed with the lack of emotion placed in my tone.
Tyler removed the towel, folding it into a neat pile before stepping into the water. He submerged himself next to me, only a swirl of water between us, and rested his head against the edge. “Do you think we’re actually allowed to talk in here?”
I laughed, tension melting from me when he spoke with no malice in his voice. “I’d say it depends on the topic of conversation but maybe we should run it by Hillis just to make sure.”
Tyler lifted his arms and stretched them along the pool, his fingertips resting just by my shoulder. “I’m surprised you agreed to come.”
“I wasn’t really given a choice.”
“Me neither,” Tyler agreed. “That Billie, huh? She’s rather skilled at getting her own way.”
“I’m blaming the baby.” Sitting up, I fanned my hands over the surface of the water, acutely aware of how close Tyler’s body was to mine. If I just let my foot float a little to the left, I would touch him. While staring down at my skin, made so pale by the water and the lights, Tyler shifted, the water swirling around his body as he moved closer. Putting his arms back on the edge of the pool, one of them reached behind my shoulders, skimming the air between us but not touching.
