by Joan Jonker
‘What’s wrong, our kid?’ Eileen asked as she dumped the shopping on the sideboard.
‘Alan’s been wounded.’ Rene’s face was red with crying, and her eyes bloodshot.
Eileen spun round. ‘How d’yer know?’
Maggie started to speak but Eileen silenced her with a frown. ‘Let her tell me, Mam!’
‘I had a letter from the War Office saying he’d been wounded,’ Rene was gasping for breath, ‘and they’d keep me informed.’
Eileen looked at the bowed head and memories came flooding back of when they were kids. Rene had always been the timid one, with Eileen, the big sister, fighting her battles for her. It was Eileen who took her to school and brought her home again because Mam said she was the oldest and had to look after her little sister. Many’s the clout Eileen got because she wouldn’t let Rene play with her and her mates. The other kids used to laugh at her because she always had to drag her kid sister with her everywhere she went. But she hadn’t been a bad kid, Eileen thought now. She’d never been a cry baby or a clat tale, and she’d always been generous with sharing sweets and toys. And when Eileen was being told off for giving cheek, Rene would always stand by her side and stick up for her.
‘How long will it be before yer hear anything, did it say?’
‘I rang the office this morning to tell them I wouldn’t be going in, and I spoke to Mr Crowley.’ Rene had gone to work in the insurance office where Alan had worked. ‘He’s going to ring London today, and if he can get any information he’ll ring me.’
‘How the hell can he ring yer when yer not at home?!’ Eileen looked up at the ceiling. ‘For Christ’s sake, our kid, why didn’t yer wait for him to call?’
‘Because I couldn’t stay in that house another minute on my own.’ Rene’s voice was low. ‘I’d go out of me mind just sitting there looking at the four walls all day.’
You wouldn’t be on your own if you hadn’t decided you didn’t want any babies, Eileen thought. But for once she didn’t voice her thoughts. Instead of the sister who insulted them every time she came by wiping the chair before she sat down, she was seeing the kid who used to run down the street after her, shouting, ‘Ah, go on, our Eileen! Let’s play with yer.’ ‘If yer like, I’ll ask Milly Knight if yer can use her phone, and yer can ring this Mr Crowley. Milly won’t mind.’
‘Will you come with me?’
For the first time, Maggie spoke. ‘Of course she will!’
Eileen looked at the half-stripped walls and shrugged. ‘I’m never goin’ to get this room done! Still, come ’ed, our kid.’
Maggie stood on the step and watched her two daughters walk down the street – one so big and ungainly, the other slim and elegant. But she loved them both, and it did her heart good to see them walking together. That’s the way sisters should be, and not always at each other’s throats. Mind you, she could understand Eileen getting in a temper sometimes because Rene could be a right little madam with her airs and graces.
‘Yer don’t mind, do yer, Milly? I wouldn’t ask yer if it wasn’t important.’ Seeing Rene’s red, swollen face, Milly was dying to ask what was wrong, but the look on Eileen’s face warned her not to. ‘Course I don’t mind!’ She lifted the hinged part of the counter top. ‘The phone’s out here.’
Eileen pushed her sister forward. ‘I’ll wait for yer here.’ She heard the tinkle as the phone was lifted, then Milly came back in the shop, curiosity written all over her face. ‘What’s happened?’ When Eileen quickly explained she shook her head. ‘What a life!’
‘You ain’t kiddin’! The world’s full of troubles and I seem to get the bloody lot!’
Rene came back and slipped through the counter. Shyly she pushed a sixpenny piece across to Milly. ‘Thanks very much.’
Milly pushed the coin back. ‘Don’t be daft!’
‘No, you’ve been very kind, please …’
‘For cryin’ out loud, kid,’ Eileen cut her short, ‘how did yer get on?’
‘He couldn’t find anything out.’ Rene’s lip started to tremble and Eileen knew she was near to tears. Cupping an elbow, she steered her sister towards the door. ‘Ta, Milly! I’ll see yer tomorrow!’
Neither spoke till they were in the house where an anxious Maggie waited. ‘Well?’
Eileen pointed to the chair. ‘Sit down, our kid.’ She lifted down another two chairs that were piled on the table. ‘Be an angel, Mam, and make a cuppa.’
Unbuttoning her coat, Eileen threw it on the couch which was covered with bits of plaster that had come away from the walls when she was scraping. ‘I’ll just give me mam a hand. Won’t be a tick!’
Maggie turned from the stove when Eileen reached across to take down three cups that were hanging on hooks. ‘Did she find out anything?’
‘Not as far as I know! She was ready to start howling in the middle of the shop, so I got her out, quick.’
‘It’s a shame, though.’ Maggie took a deep breath. ‘It must be terrible for her not knowing what’s happened to Alan, and being on her own.’
‘For Christ’s sake, Mam, don’t start sympathisin’ with her or yer’ll make it worse! Don’t forget my feller’s a prisoner of war and I’ve got to get on with it like thousands of others.’
‘But she hasn’t got your strength … she never had!’
‘Ah, come off it, Mam! Because I don’t bawl me ’ead off every time something goes wrong, yer think I’m bloody Tarzan!’
Maggie put a finger to her lips. ‘Sshh, she’ll hear you!’
‘Too bloody bad!’ Eileen banged the cups down. ‘You make the tea an’ I’ll go and hold her hand.’
Rene was sitting with her head bowed, nervously clasping her fingers. She jumped when Eileen asked, ‘D’yer want to stay and have some tea with us? It’s only bangers and mash, though!’
‘Can I sleep here tonight?’
‘Sleep here?!’ Eileen’s voice rose as she imagined her sister wrinkling her nose at the state of the bedrooms. ‘There’s nowhere for yer to sleep!’
‘I could sleep on the couch! I wouldn’t mind!’
Maggie bustled in with the tray. ‘You’d get no sleep on that couch, love; it’s got more humps than a camel’s back.’ Handing Eileen a cup, her nostrils flared and her eyes glinted. ‘She can sleep with you! You’ve got a big double bed all to yourself.’
‘With my size, I need it!’ Eileen knew it was no good fighting. Her mother would harp till she got her own way. ‘Well, when I’ve kicked yer out of bed in the middle of the night, our kid, don’t say yer weren’t warned!’
In the street, Billy was sharing the sweets with his sisters. ‘Me Auntie Rene’s in our ’ouse, an’ there must be summat up ’cos she’s been cryin’.’ He tried to put an extra sweet on his pile while imparting the news, but Edna was too quick for him. ‘I’ll tell me mam on yer! Yer a cheat, our Billy!’ So Billy counted the sweets again, happily thinking of the two bull’s eyes he’d hidden in his trouser pocket.
Their mouths black-rimmed from the black jacks, Edna and Joan ran home filled with curiosity. They were in awe of their auntie who spoke posh and didn’t ever have much to say to them except ask how they were getting on in school. But she always gave them a penny for sweets and this was in their minds as they barged through the front door. They were out of luck though as Eileen met them half way down the hall and turned them back.
‘I’ll give yez a shout when the tea’s ready.’ Lowering her voice, she hissed, ‘And behave yerselves or I’ll tan the backsides off yer. No wipin’ yer nose on the back of yer sleeves, d’yer ’ear?’
Eileen had to stretch the food out to cover an extra plate, but was rewarded when Rene wiped her plate clean and said, ‘I enjoyed that!’ If the oilcloth covering the table caused her to think of her own highly polished table, with its snow-white damask cloth, she didn’t let it show. She knew she was the reason for the kids being so quiet and tried to draw them out. ‘What’s your favourite game, Billy?’
Billy’s face fl
amed. ‘I dunno!’
‘Yes you do, our Billy!’ young Edna piped up. ‘It’s Cowboys and Indians.’
‘No, it’s not!’ Billy kicked her under the table and she let out a shriek.
‘’E kicked me, Mam.’
‘I thought it was too good to be true.’ Eileen started to collect the dishes. ‘Any more, and yer’ll all go to bed.’
‘Ah, ay, Mam! Can’t we play out?’ Billy glared at his sister who was rubbing the ankle he’d kicked. ‘Go on, Mam! We’ll only play in the street.’
Three pairs of eyes fastened on Eileen as Joan coaxed, ‘Honest, Mam, we’ll stay near the ’ouse.’
The thought of them playing out was far more attractive than having them in the house shouting and squabbling. ‘OK; but in by seven, mind!’
The dishes washed, the three women sat at the table with their second cup of tea. ‘Are yer goin’ in to work tomorrow, sis?’
‘I may as well, or I’d go nuts in that house all day on my own.’
‘You may hear something in a day or two,’ Maggie offered. ‘They’re bound to let you know what’s happening.’
‘Mr Crowley said Alan may be in a field hospital.’ Rene bit her lips to stop them trembling. ‘He said if Alan’s not fit for active duty they’ll send him home.’
‘Kid, it’s time to start worrying when yer’ve got something to worry about!’ Eileen’s eyes travelled round the half-stripped walls. ‘You two mightn’t have anything better to do, but I’ve got to get crackin’ on these walls! I’ve only got tonight and tomorrow to get them finished.’ She glanced sideways at Maggie. ‘Why don’t you an’ our kid go to the pictures? It’ll take yer mind off things, and give me a chance to get some work done.’
‘No!’ Rene answered quickly. ‘I’m not going to the pictures! I’ll give you a hand with the scraping.’
Eileen looked at the smart navy blue dress with its neat white collar and burst out laughing. ‘Dressed like that?’
‘You can lend me an overall, can’t you? And I’m quite capable of scraping walls.’
Ten minutes later Eileen and Maggie were doubled up with laughter as Rene stood before them in one of Eileen’s overalls. ‘Yer look like little orphan Annie.’ Eileen was convulsed. ‘Me mam could get in there with yer.’
Rene looked down at herself. ‘I could fit in one of the sleeves!’ Her green eyes were shining and Eileen could see the sister she used to know. She hasn’t changed that much, she thought. Not deep down she hasn’t.
After tying a belt round her waist, which had the effect of making the overall look like a tent, Rene rolled her sleeves up. ‘What are you standing around for? Let’s get crackin’!’
‘You hold the ladder while I reach up to the top.’ Eileen had her foot on the bottom rung when Rene burst out, ‘Not ruddy likely!’ She was standing with her hands on her hips surveying the rickety ladder. ‘If you think I’m going to hold this with you on top, you’ve got another think coming! If you fell I’d be crushed to death!’ She shook her head vigorously, ‘Oh, no! You hold the ladder and I’ll do the scraping. Then, if I fall, I’ll have a nice soft cushion to fall on!’
‘The flamin’ cheek of you!’ Eileen winked at Maggie. ‘D’yer hear that, Mam? I’m gettin’ insulted in me own ’ouse!’
Unhindered by too much weight, Rene worked quickly. By ten o’clock the walls had all been stripped, the floor brushed, the old paper crammed into a cardboard box and the ladder back in the outside lavvy. ‘I’m glad yer came, our kid!’ Eileen grinned. ‘Yer’d make a good labourer!’
‘Now who’s got a flamin’ cheek?!’ Rene folded the overall. ‘I did all the flamin’ work!’
That’s more like it; Eileen exchanged knowing glances with her mother. She’s beginning to sound like our Rene now!
Eileen lay on her back in the bed. ‘Yer’ll let us know as soon as yer hear anythin’, won’t yer?’
‘I’ll come straight up, I promise.’
‘Well, I’m dead beat so I’ll say goodnight, our kid.’ Eileen turned on her side, as near to the edge of the bed as she could get to give her sister more room. ‘God bless!’ She felt an arm come round her ample waist, ‘Night and God bless, Eileen, and thanks.’
We used to sleep like this as kids, Eileen remembered. She could feel a lump come into her throat and tutted to herself. This cryin’ lark must be catchin’! They’ve got me at it now!
Chapter Eight
‘Your hair looks lovely, Mam.’ Mary touched the snow-white hair washed earlier by Nurse Nolan. ‘I’m glad I put those curlers in.’ She sat down then bounced up again. ‘It’s no good, I can’t settle! Where’s he got to!? I’m going to see if there’s any sign of him.’ She opened the door to see Vera Jackson from next door hurrying past, her three-year-old daughter clasped in her arms. ‘Off to the shops, Vera?’
‘No, I’m nipping to the doctor’s to see if he can give me anything for Carol’s cold.’ Vera transferred the child to her other arm. ‘God, she’s not half a weight to carry round.’
Mary smiled at the little mongol girl and the moon-like face with its unblinking eyes smiled back. ‘Are you coming in to see Nanna Bradshaw?’
‘Your mam won’t want to be bothered with us,’ Vera answered.
‘What d’you mean, Vera, she won’t be bothered? You know she dotes on Carol!’ Mary shot a glance at the woman who, when she was a teenager, Mary wanted to grow up to be like. Vera had been very attractive then. She used to walk down the street, tall and slim in her three-inch heels, her thick auburn hair worn in a long page-boy bob, her face carefully made-up and wearing what Mary thought was the very latest fashion in clothes. She was so full of life and always happy. Then Carol was born and the change in Vera was dramatic. Flat heels replaced the fashion shoes, she ceased to wear make-up, her beautiful hair was combed back from her face and tied with a piece of string and the clothes she wore were dowdy.
‘Come in for a few minutes.’ Mary walked back into the house leaving Vera to follow. ‘Look who’s come to see you, Mam.’ Mary took Carol from Vera’s arms and stood her in front of Martha. The child tried to struggle free and Mary’s grip tightened. ‘You’re only little but you’ve got the strength of a horse.’
‘You can say that again!’ Vera sighed. She loved her daughter dearly but was worn out by her constant demands for attention. It wouldn’t be so bad if she was the only child, but there were the two boys to look after as well. And nobody ever knocked on her door and asked if they could mind the baby, like they did at other houses. In fact some of the kids made fun of Carol when they saw her, and this caused fights between them and Colin, who was twelve, and Peter who was nine.
Vera watched Mary lift Carol carefully on to Martha’s knee, and as soon as Martha had her safely in the crook of her arm she snuggled her to her breast. Carol was gurgling with contentment and Vera thought how much love her daughter needed. But apart from these two, and myself, she doesn’t get it. The boys were kind to her in their own way, but she embarrassed them, and Vera couldn’t blame them when people said their sister wasn’t ‘right’ in the head. Even Carol’s own father, Danny, was ashamed of having sired a mongol. He’d never admit it, but it was the truth. Never once, since the day she was born, had he held her in his arms or kissed her.
‘Come on, love, time to go.’ Vera swept Carol up, bringing forth a howl of protest. ‘I know, you’re nice and comfortable, but we’ve got to get to the doctor’s and back before your dad comes in for his tea.’
Pity he can’t make his own tea for a change, Mary felt like saying, but she held her tongue. Vera never complained but they knew what the situation was next door. They’d heard Danny bawling if ever Vera asked if she could go to the pictures for a break. ‘I’ve been working all day an’ I’m too tired to be mindin’ a whinging brat while you go off and enjoy yourself.’ So Vera would stay in, and when they heard the door slam later, Mary would say: ‘He’s not too tired to go for his pint.’
Mary walked to the door behind
Vera. ‘I’m expecting Bob any minute. You know his parents have gone to live in Preston, don’t you?’
‘Elsie Smith told me.’
Mary laughed. ‘You don’t need to buy the Echo with her around! She knows everyone’s business, and what she doesn’t know she makes up.’
Back in the living room, Mary stood in front of her mother’s chair. ‘I feel awful sorry for Vera. She doesn’t get much out of life with that lazy husband of hers.’ Then came the sound she’d waited for all day. ‘He’s here, Mam!’
Martha heard Mary’s cry of pleasure, then Bob’s deep laugh. ‘Hey, watch it! You’re nearly strangling me!’
They came through the door arm in arm, their faces shining with the joy of being together. And when Bob saw Martha sitting in her chair, his mouth gaped. ‘Well, I’ll be blowed!’
‘Doesn’t she look great? Nurse sat her out yesterday while we changed the bed and Mam wouldn’t go back. So Nurse said she could sit out each day until she comes in the afternoon to wash her.’
Mary pulled at Bob’s coat sleeve. ‘Take your coat off and look as though you’re staying!’
‘I was hoping to catch an earlier train, but when the news came on the wireless me dad couldn’t stop talking about it and I didn’t like just walking out.’
Mary’s eyes clouded. ‘What news?’
‘You mean you haven’t heard? Hitler’s declared war on Russia!’
‘We haven’t had the wireless on.’ Mary frowned. ‘What does that mean?’
‘It means that Hitler threw everything he could at us during the blitz, hoping to put us out of action so he could have a go at Russia without us being able to do anything about it. But he’s picked on the wrong ones with the Russians. They won’t let him walk all over them like the rest of Europe has.’
