by Nikki Carter
After we say “amen,” Grandma Stokes says, “Everything looks good, Gwendolyn. I’m proud of you.”
I’m praying that a lightning bolt doesn’t crack the sky and scorch my grandma for lying.
Pastor Stokes hands LeRon the carving knife. “Since your wife did the cooking, you can do the honors.”
LeRon slices thin pieces of turkey and puts them on everyone’s plates. From what I can tell, aside from the dark skin, the turkey seems to be fine. At least it looks done all the way through.
We all pass the side dishes and mostly everyone only takes enough for a bite or two. Everyone except LeRon, that is. He piles his plate high and stuffs his face like it’s the best meal he’s ever eaten. My mom’s smile beams over in his direction, and she looks super happy.
I guess eating food that technically could be listed as a biohazard is the definition of love.
Sweet!
25
On the first day back from winter break, the hallways are buzzing with something. I don’t know what, yet, because I just walked into the school. It must be high drama because Jewel and Kelani, wearing their matching Christmas outfits, are standing in front of my locker looking twisted.
“Hey, y’all,” I say.
“Hey, Gia.” Jewel’s eyes go directly to my hair. “Ooh, that barrette is fly! Did you get that for Christmas?”
I nod. “Ricky gave it to me.”
I know I didn’t have to tell them that Ricky gave me the gift, but I’m ready to put our mutual crushes on public status. It’s time for me to claim what’s mine so that all the other potential crushees can sit down somewhere.
“You and Ricky are like that now? Okay!” Kelani pounds my fist and laughs.
“It’s about time!” Jewel exclaims. “Y’all been playing games since ninth grade.”
“So what’s going on? What’s everybody talking about?” I ask.
“Oh, you didn’t hear?” Kelani says. “Valerie’s mom got arrested over the weekend for cyber stalking. The police came right to their door on the day after Christmas and took her away.”
My eyes feel like they’re about to pop out of my head. Kelani explains, “Her neighbor’s cousin called my mother’s beautician and she gave my mom the scoop while she was getting her weave.”
Whoa. Not the ten degrees of separation on the gossip tip.
“Are you serious?” I ask. “Is Valerie okay? Has anybody talked to her?”
“I haven’t,” Jewel says. “I tried to call her cell, but she hasn’t been picking up.”
“Did your mother’s beautician have any details?” I ask.
“Only that whatever Valerie’s mom was doing was the reason why Susan Chiang tried to kill herself. It had something to do with Facebook.”
Jewel says, “The police had an anonymous tip, I think.”
I am almost one hundred percent sure that Jewel can neither spell nor define “anonymous,” but that’s beside the point. The real issue here is that Valerie’s mom got arrested. I thought she might get in trouble, but I didn’t know they’d arrest her and put her in jail.
“That is messed up,” I say.
“Here she comes now,” Jewel says.
Valerie struts down the center hallway of Longfellow High and she looks like a teenage supermodel. Her hair is flat-ironed pin straight and parted down the center. She’s got on a pink miniskirt (even though it’s twenty-two degrees outside) and a shiny top that would look appropriate on most people only at a club.
And no, she does not have the audacity to be wearing pink-tinted sunglasses. I almost expect to see a little white dog pop his head up out of her purse.
“Hey, Hi-Steppers! Ooo-OOO!” Valerie says as she stops at my locker.
She seems to be in high spirits. Too high for someone whose mama got taken to the slammer.
“Hi, Valerie,” I say. “How was your vacation?”
Valerie bursts into a flurry of laughter. “Cut the games, Gia. I know you and the twin bobble heads already know what happened with my mom. It’s all over town.”
I glance at Jewel and Kelani, who are trying to pretend like they’re innocent. “Yes, we heard, of course. Are you okay?”
“I’m great! I just got finished talking to Mrs. Spencer, the senior counselor, and she said that all of those restrictions they had on me are lifted. I can go to the prom, I can graduate, and I can run for prom queen if I want to!”
“But aren’t you upset about your mom?” I ask.
“Sure, but my uncle got her a good lawyer. He said that there’s not really anything they can charge her with in our state. He said she’d be out on bail sometime this week.”
“Is your mom going to apologize to Susan or anything?” I ask.
Valerie laughs again. “Um, probably not. My mom can’t stand Susan or her parents.”
Well, at least Valerie gets her evil honest. Her mom actually has her beat. I wonder how either one of them sleeps at night.
“Susan is back in school today,” Kelani says. “You should probably stay away from her, Valerie.”
“What for? I didn’t do anything to her. She’s the one who stole my Homecoming Queen title. My mother and I are not the same person.”
I shake my head angrily. “Valerie, when are you going to let that go? Susan didn’t steal anything from you. She won fair and square. You need to squash this, because it’s way out of control.”
“Shut up, Gia. You’re always trying to rule somebody with your goody-goody self. Save it for your goody-goody lame church friends.”
“My lame church friends? Why are you coming to our PGP meetings if you think we’re lame?”
“I don’t know. Tell your mom that I’m dropping out. A cotillion is a stupid idea anyway. I’m going to the prom in a few months.”
I toss one hand up. “Whatever.”
I slam my locker shut and walk away from Valerie, Jewel, and Kelani. Valerie calls after me. “Hey, Gia, do you want to put your detective hat on again? Someone snitched on my mother and I need to find out who it was.”
“Nah, go find another goody-goody to help you out.”
Valerie has sufficiently irritated me, so I appreciate seeing Ricky at the end of first period. He’s standing at his locker, dressed in his Tennessee Titans jersey looking extra fine.
“Nice jersey,” I say, sneaking up on him.
He smiles. “Thanks. A good friend bought it for me.”
I lift my eyebrows. Good friend? I thought we’d moved beyond good friend into the almost-crush zone. Ricky stays flip-flopping. He’s worse than the politicians my mom made me watch on CNN during the last election.
“Your good friend? Was it a guy friend, because if it was a girl, I’d say she might be more than a good friend,” I reply.
“It is a girl, and she’s my friend.”
“Does that make her your girlfriend ?”
Ricky laughs. “What’s up, Gi-Gi? I see you’re rocking your barrette.”
“Yeah. Some dude gave it to me.”
“Wow, okay. I’m some dude now?”
I shrug. “As long as I’m a good friend, you can be some dude.”
Ricky takes his finger and trails a line down my arm and ends with my fingertips. His touch feels electric.
“You know you’re more than a good friend, Gia.”
Kevin, as usual, busts up our moment. “Hey, y’all! What it do?”
Kevin is wearing every single last one of his Christmas presents. New jeans, new boots, new suede jacket with furry collar, and new Cleveland Browns hat. The entire ensemble complements his tall, thin frame and the color scheme brings out the light brown flecks in his eyes. With a little bit more work, Kevin can be upgraded to full-time hottie.
“Hey, Kev,” Ricky says. “Are we forcing Gia to learn to drive this week?”
Kevin nods. “Yep. It’s past time, Gia. We need you to go ahead and do that. I’m not going to be driving you around New York City.”
“I’ll take the subway, Kevin. Everyo
ne does.”
Ricky interjects, “I know that you two are like the smartest kids in the class, but y’all do know that there is a chance that they might pick somebody else for this summer program.”
Kevin laughs. “Not unless they’re smoking something. And I’m planning to go to Columbia anyway, so I’m perfect. How could they not pick me?”
I have to agree with Kevin. If they pick anyone in our class it will be Kevin. Kev’s had straight A’s since he started kindergarten, and hasn’t ever even had a detention. He’s the poster child for anyone’s enrichment program.
Kevin says, “Did y’all hear Valerie’s mother got arrested? That’s tripped out, huh?”
“For real?” Ricky asks. “Gia, why didn’t you say something?”
“I was about to.”
“You cool?” he asks.
Ricky is the only one who knows that I went to my uncle about this. I know he’ll keep the secret, though, so I’m not even worried about that. Ricky is like a vault when it comes to secrets. They go in, but they don’t come out. I love that about him.
“I’m good. And so is Valerie, by the way. She’s planning to be the prom queen now.”
Ricky laughs. “Dang, that girl stays trying to be the winner. Her mother might go to jail and she’s planning for the prom.”
“You can’t say she’s not prepared!”
Kevin points down the hall. “Here comes Hope.”
She looks funny, racing at breakneck speed. What’s even funnier is that I’m almost one hundred percent sure she’s coming over here to tell us what we already know.
Hope leans on the locker, completely out of breath. “Did ... y’all hear ...”
“About Valerie’s mom?” I ask. “Yes, we heard. The entire school has heard.”
Hope shakes her head. “That’s not what I was about to say. Valerie and Susan just got into a fight. Susan confronted Valerie and demanded an apology, and Valerie told her to kick rocks.”
“What! Valerie just got out of trouble. Now she’s starting fights? I thought she wanted to go to the prom.”
“That’s the thing! Valerie didn’t start it. Susan swung on Valerie first. Smacked her so hard she flew into the lockers. Then Susan jumped on her and started scratching, pulling her hair, the works!”
Wow! Valerie got the smack-down from a lame. This is going to go down in Longfellow High history.
Kevin asks, “Did somebody break it up?”
“One of the counselors pulled Susan off of Valerie, and it was over. Valerie was screaming that she was pressing charges.”
“I think someone needs to call Aunt Elena,” I say. “Because fighting at school is against the PGP code of conduct.”
Hope gasps. “You want to get Valerie kicked out of PGP?”
“She says we’re a bunch of lames anyway. She should be happy we did!”
26
“In just three short months, we’ll be having our PGP cotillion, announcing you as debutantes to all of your families and friends,” Aunt Elena announces.
How about we all know the cotillion is coming? For most of the girls in the room, it’s the only reason why they joined PGP in the first place. I’m looking forward to it, especially since Ricky is going to be my escort. It’s going to be fiyah!
Speaking of the other girls, Valerie isn’t here and we didn’t even snitch on her about fighting. I heard my mom say that she’d quit the program. Oh well, guess she doesn’t want to be powerful or pure!
But right now, I’m more concerned about taking that SAT test. The cotillion is probably last on my list of concerns right now.
About halfway through our meeting, the back door of the church opens and Sascha Cohen walks in. Aunt Elena stops her speech and looks to my mother for saving. She’s gonna make my mom be the bad guy, I see.
“How can we help you, Ms. Cohen?”
Sascha clears her throat. “I just wanted to apologize to everyone in the program about the drama that I’ve brought to everyone. I also want to ask if I can rejoin the program. I am still pure and I haven’t broken any rules.”
My mother replies, “Okay, Sascha, since you are so determined to be a part of PGP, we’ll allow you back in on a trial basis. If, between now and the cotillion, we observe any conduct that is unbecoming to a young lady in this program, we will ask you not to participate.”
Sascha runs up to the front of the church and hugs Aunt Elena and then my mother. She looks so happy! I’m just glad my mother decided to stop acting like a dictator.
After we’re dismissed, everyone goes up to Sascha to welcome her back. I wait until I’m the last one, because I’ve got some questions that I want to ask. No, this is not about being nosy, this is about looking out for my girl!
“Congratulations, Sascha,” I say when it’s finally my turn. “What made you come back?”
“I talked to my mom about it and she said that the worst they could do was say no.”
Sascha’s mom clearly does not know the carnage that my mom can cause. She could certainly do worse than saying no, but that’s neither here nor there right now.
“Well, you’re back in now. That’s the most important thing. Chase isn’t going to be your escort at the cotillion, is he?”
Sascha frowns. “Why wouldn’t he be? He is my boyfriend, Gia. That hasn’t changed.”
“I just assumed you broke up with him and that’s why you’re coming back to us. My bad.”
“I’m still with him, so yes, he’ll be escorting me.”
Somehow that sounds like a bad idea, but I’m not about to judge her. Even if I wanted to judge, I haven’t got time. I’ve got to go over these SAT vocabulary flash cards one more time with Ricky and Kevin before we take our test tomorrow.
So Sascha and her manhandling boyfriend drama has to take a backseat.
“Pencils. Do you have pencils?” Kevin asks in the car on the way to the testing location.
“Kevin, I’ve got a whole box of pencils. I’ve never had more pencils for any test. I think I’m covered on pencils.”
Kevin ignores my sarcasm. “What about you, Ricky? You good?”
“Yes, Kev. I’ve got pencils too.”
Never before have I seen Kevin this fired up. He even drank coffee this morning. Well, it was a mocha caramel latte, but it was coffee nonetheless. He’s wearing all black. A black turtleneck, black jeans, and black cardigan sweater.
“Kevin, what’s with the all black?” I ask. “You look like you’re about to rob a jewelry store.”
“Opposite of funny. I’m in serious mode. These are serious clothes, because I’ve got my serious game face on.”
The way he scrunches his eyebrows down so that they’re nearly touching his nose does not look serious at all. Actually, it looks like utter hilarity, so Ricky and I burst into laughter. And not a couple of tee-hee giggles; I’m talking a lean-over laughter that makes your stomach muscles hurt.
“Silence!” Kevin screams.
This is even funnier, because Kevin is driving with one hand and the other is raised in a fist to the ceiling! Is he supposed to be scary?
“Stop it, Kevin,” I beg. “You’re gonna make me pee on myself.”
“You had better not, Gia. I will pull off one of those afro puffs if you do.”
Tears are rolling down my face now. Why does Kevin do this? The one time when I need to be focused and ready for business, and I’m laughing uncontrollably at Kevin’s antics. Ricky’s doubled over in the front seat too, so neither one of us can stop.
“Are you two ready to stop now?” Kevin asks. “We’re at the testing location.”
Ricky and I both breathe in and out, trying to stop the flow of laughter. As I relax, I realize that all of my tension about the test is gone. I think I needed that laugh to get my head in the game.
Now I’m cool, calm, and totally ready. I’m about to go in here and spank some SAT bootay! Holla!
27
It’s been two and a half weeks since we took our SAT exam,
and Kevin is about to have a meltdown. He’s ready to get that score, and I don’t blame him. I’m ready too.
The testing center gave us a password and told us that our scores would be available three weeks after we took the test. That leaves us just a few days. I’m trying not to be like Kevin and have my mind completely occupied with the test scores, so I’m doing something else.
Shopping for cotillion gowns with my mother, Aunt Elena, Hope, and Candy. Womp, womp on me.
“I want something strapless,” Candy announces as we walk into a bridal store.
My mom replies, “Why don’t you try something modest? This entire exercise is about purity and innocence, so I’m not letting you get some hoochie dress.”
“And why does strapless have to mean hoochie? I’ve seen several strapless gowns on the Oscars red carpet that scream class and sophistication! Nothing hoochie at all.”
Everyone stops and gives Candy the blank stare. She should be used to receiving that look. She gets it almost daily from our crew.
I say, “I don’t care what my dress looks like as long as it doesn’t itch.”
“I bet Ricky would like to see you in something flowery, since he called you a butterfly!”
My hand subconsciously goes to my butterfly barrette that I wear every day. “Shut up, Hope. What would Brother Bryan like to see you in?”
“Why does everyone keep making jokes about my escort?” Hope asks. “He’s like a big brother to me. This is so not a date.”
“As long as you know that,” Aunt Elena says. “Your daddy would have a conniption fit if you tried to date someone as old as Brother Bryan.”
First of all, no, I do not have an exact definition for conniption fit. It’s one of those things that you know when you see it. Second, Brother Bryan is not that old. He’s only twenty-five. Do they think we can’t do math?
Plus, Brother Bryan is hotness personified.
Yep, just sprung an SAT word on you. You thought that after I took the test I’d be done using multisyllabic words? Womp on you. Deal with it.
“Candy, Kevin is escorting you, right?” my mom asks. “He’s a good boy. Deacon and Mother Witherspoon are doing such a good job raising him.”
