“Now, who’s the one with an addiction?”
She chuckles. “More like an obsession or a fascination, even. There’s something so terrifying, yet completely thrilling about your lifestyle. It’s starting to grow on me.”
“We should have talked about this before, but you need a safeword. Saying no or stop is not good enough.”
“I’ve never said either of those words. You don’t let me talk or make noise during sex.”
“You can say them. In fact, it would heighten my pleasure more if you said them.”
“You like the struggle.”
“Yes, it’s fucking hot and intensifies my experience. It would do the same for you.”
“Okay, let’s clarify a few things. When you say you want me to say no or stop, it’s more about me fighting you, not like you want to rape me. Does that make sense?”
I laugh. “No, I am not raping you. The sex is consensual, but the struggle is more about the pain I am inflicting. I get enjoyment out of watching you. It turns me on.”
She leans her head back on my shoulder. “I guess it will take me some time to understand.”
“You have to trust me to go deeper and show you even more about myself, but I have to know that you can hand over that trust. What word do you want to use for your safeword?”
“I don’t know what’s yours?”
“I don’t need one. I’m the Dominant. You need one, though. So, what’s it going to be? It should be a word you would never use during sex.”
She raises her finger to her lips. “What should I choose?”
“You could even use red or safeword if you forget.”
“Are you going to be that rough with me that I will have to beg you to stop?”
“Maybe. Sometimes, I lose myself. I haven’t done that with you because I have been careful. But I want to lose myself in you so bad.”
“Your version of careful earned me a body full of bruises. I can’t even imagine what you’re like once you lower your guard.” She clutches my hand, threading her fingers between mine. “We are forming a connection. What we’re doing right now will bring you back to me. I will never lose you.”
“I wouldn’t be so sure of that, Scar. Pick your word, would ya?”
“Pirate,” she says with a cheesy grin on her lips.
I laugh. “Yeah, that would throw me off for sure. There’s nothing less sexy than a pirate.”
“You said to choose something random that I wouldn’t say during sex, and I would never use the word pirate.”
“Okay.” I shake my head, amused by the strange turn in this conversation. “Pirate is your safeword that will tell me that I have to stop. There are other types of safewords. Sometimes, I might ask you if you want to keep going or if you want me to do something harder or slow down. We can communicate those things without stopping to talk about it.”
“Do I have to pick more words?” She bites down on her bottom lip. “I hope I don’t forget any of them. How much more do I have to come up with?”
“We’ll keep them simple. If you ever forget pirate, you can say red, and that will mean the same thing to me. Red means you can’t handle anymore.”
“Are we using all colors?”
“Yes. Each color has a different meaning. We’ll use green, yellow, and red to keep it simple.”
“Like a stoplight. Oh, I get it. Red for stop, green for keep going, and yellow to slow down.”
“Exactly.”
“I won’t forget the colors.”
“Please don’t. The last thing I want to do is hurt you. A Dominant’s relationship with his submissive is about trust. We are going into this, knowing that we want the same thing and that pain comes along with the pleasure, but you have to stop me if I cross the line. The breaking you in part is over.”
“I promise,” she says. “I will tell you if things get out of hand.”
“Good. Now, let’s get you washed so that I can kiss all of your bruises better.”
She flinches as I dip down to kiss the big one on her shoulder. I hate myself for ruining a good girl like Scarlett. But I did warn her.
Scarlett
I tilt my head back, allowing Aiden to pour water over my hair. The soap slides down my face and onto his chest.
“Almost done,” he says, pushing his fingers through my hair.
“Did you get all the shampoo out?”
He gives my head one final inspection. “Yup, all clean.”
“This is my first adult bath,” I confess. “I never knew it could be this fun.”
The corners of his mouth turn up into a smile that mirrors mine. “I guess there’s a first time for everything.”
“Can we finish our conversation from earlier?” I hesitate, wondering if now is the best time to rehash his past.
I want to know more about Aiden and what makes him tick. As his doctor, I need to dig deeper to fully understand what specific point in his life made him this way.
He sighs. “Do we have to? Didn’t we have enough family talk for one day?”
“I have one more question. Do you blame yourself for your mother’s death?”
“Pirate,” he says, looking away from me.
“You’re using my safeword on me?”
He laughs. “Yeah, I guess I am. You get an out, and so do I. The answer is yes, but I don’t want to talk about my mother or anything related to my shitty past. Right now, all I want to do is finishing washing your delicious body so that I can lick every inch of it.”
“Mmm…That sounds amazing.”
“I thought you would like that.” He takes my ear in his mouth and sucks on it, causing my toes to curl. Then, he reaches between my legs to slide his finger along my folds. “You are always wet and ready for me.”
“It’s hard not to be when I have your thick cock digging into my back. Plus, you were massaging me more than you washed me.”
“I was doing a thorough inspection. I didn’t want to miss a single part of you.”
Aiden lifts me up by my hips, rubbing the tip of his cock along my entrance, before inching me onto him. As he moves me up and down, Aiden digs his fingers into my skin. I let out a soft moan from the pain of him touching my fresh marks, his name a whisper on my lips.
He picks up the pace, and I hold onto the edges of the tub to stabilize myself. The pleasure of him between my legs outweighs the pain of his rough touch and the force at which he thrusts into me. As Aiden hooks his arm around my stomach, he sits up enough to flatten my back against his chest and pumps into me even harder.
I take what he has to give me, loving every second of the sensation that commands authority over my body. At this moment, he owns every part of me. Aiden uses sex as a way of healing. I want to help him get better. My body is one sacrifice I am willing to make.
“Should I let you come?” He whispers the words against the shell of my ear.
“Please, sir,” I hiss. “Please. I want to come.”
He sinks his teeth into my neck, tugging hard at my tender skin. Aiden kisses from where he bit me and down my shoulder, leaving a brush of fire in his wake. Sometimes, I hate being the submissive woman Aiden wants me to be, but at times like this, I give in to him completely. I submit to him.
“Just this once.” His words come out in ragged breaths the faster he moves. “You were nosy today, but for the most part, you’ve been a good girl.”
When I grip the edges of the tub, my nails scrape along the marble, causing my fingers to go numb along with the rest of me. I feel full from the pressure that builds from within, my nipples so sensitive and hard that they hurt as my high rushes over me. Aiden has this power over my body. He makes me defenseless against his ability to deliver multiple orgasms.
“Aiden…Fuck,” I cry out.
He fists my hair in his hand and tugs so hard my scalp stings. “Come for me, Scar. Scream my fucking name.”
As if singing my own song, I moan Aiden’s name repeatedly. My entire body trembles, his cock buri
ed so deep inside my pussy that I feel him in every inch of my body. He rips the words from my mouth along with my orgasm, adding to the other ones he now owns. Claimed. Owned. Wrecked. All of those words describe what Aiden has done to me.
How could I ever be with another man after Aiden? He has ruined me for all men, that much I am certain. Aiden has fulfilled his promise. But what happens after he’s done with me? A man who believes he is incapable of love will never love someone in return. He would never love the woman he fucks so hard she has the marks to prove her ownership.
Our moans become one along with our bodies as we find our release. Aiden fills me, his body jerking one last time before he hugs me against him and breathes against my back.
“I wish we did this back in college,” he says in a hushed tone. “You were always supposed to be mine.”
“Me, too,” I confess.
I slide off him and onto my side of the tub, our juices spilling down my inner thigh. He slips his hand behind me to bring me closer, resting my head on his shoulder.
“I have to go to the apartment, Aiden. Today is moving day.”
He sighs. “I hate that you have to deal with this. Your parent's house is so far away from here.”
“Highland Park is not that far. Stop being dramatic.”
“I don’t like it. I want you close to me.”
“Well, I couldn’t find anything decent before Mark told me he was moving some chick into my apartment.”
“I want to beat the shit out of that asshole.”
“He’s my past. Don’t even waste your energy thinking about him.”
“You should move in with me.”
His words take me by surprise, causing me to peek up at him. “Are you serious? You want me to move in with you.”
He shrugs. “Yeah, why not? You spend a lot of time here anyway. You could have your own room and as much as space as you need.”
“Oh,” I say, deflated. “You want me to be your roommate. That’s a generous offer.”
“Of course, you wouldn’t be just my roommate. Sure, you would be living here and have a bedroom to yourself, so technically that would make you my roommate, but you’re also my submissive.”
“Is that why I get a room? Why can’t I sleep with you? We do it all the time.”
“I thought you might like some space. This place is big enough for you to have a few rooms to yourself. It’s too much for me.”
“I want to sleep in bed with you.”
He turns his head away from me. “I guess you could on occasion, but I prefer to sleep alone.”
“But I have slept in your bed with you the last few times I was here.”
“That was different. You were a guest.”
“And now, I would be your roomie. Got it.” I push myself up from the water and hop over him to get out of the tub.
He grabs my hand. “Scar, I don’t mean anything by it. I have certain ways of doing things. This is all I know. If you move in here and sleep in my bed, that would make you my girlfriend.”
“Would that be so awful? You have no problem branding me with your fingerprints and claiming me as your own, but you are afraid of calling me your girlfriend. When you call me you're submissive, I don’t argue. I go with the flow, even though we both know that I am far from submissive. If you can’t give in a little, then why should I? Why should I play your game?”
“This isn’t a game, Scarlett.” Aiden gets up, distracting me with his still erect cock. He throws one leg over the edge of the tub and then the other and then presses his chest into my arm. “This is a lifestyle. It’s no different than a religion to some people. I thought you were starting to understand that.”
I look up at him with tears in my eyes. “I am, but I want more from you.”
He wipes away my tears with the back of his hand. “I already told you that I can’t give you more.”
“Then, I guess our little experiment is over. You should find another doctor to treat you. I am no longer equipped to give you the help you need.”
I lift a towel from the rack and wrap it around my soaking wet body that feels like putty from all the pounding Aiden did between my legs. Every part of me hurts. Now, I get to go back to the apartment I shared with Mark, with my head hung in shame, and pack my shit. And move back in with my parents, of all places.
Aiden tries to place his palm on my shoulder, but I walk past him and into his bedroom. I gather my clothes from the floor and drop them onto his bed. The massive four-poster bed that is fit for a king spans a large portion of the room, though it doesn’t even put a dent in it because of the sheer size.
Aiden comes up from behind me and hugs me, resting his chin on my shoulder. “Please don’t leave, Scar. I don’t want this to end.”
“Then, you have to make a change.”
“Sleeping in my bed with me is the only thing you want?”
His question has me asking myself if our sleeping arrangement is all I need from him. Or do I want more? I will probably always want more from this man. But I will take what I can get.
“For now, yes,” I admit.
“And what about when that is not enough? I cannot lose you, Scarlett. You’re doing things to me that I never thought were possible.”
“But I haven’t changed you. If anything, you only want to hurt me more than before.”
“You don’t understand.” He kisses my neck, each of his kisses creating tiny bumps down my arm with each movement. “I am never going to change. This is who I am.”
“How am I going to cover up all these bruises? Have you thought about how I will see patients or deal with our colleagues when I look like I was in a car accident?”
“I’ll be more careful.” He kisses the aching bruise on my right shoulder, which causes me to hiss.
“That hurts so fucking bad, Aiden. You have to stop yourself from doing this to me.”
“Why did you let me?”
“Because it felt too good to stop. I lose control with you.”
“Me, too.” His hands travel down my sides and to my hips. “I’ve never enjoyed fucking anyone as much as you. I love how you respond to me. I love how wet you get for me. I completely lose myself in you, Scar.”
“Maybe we’re bad for each other.”
“No, you are perfect for me.” He cups my breasts in both hands and twists my nipples between his fingers. “See how well you react to the simplest touch.”
“That’s because you’re good with your hands.”
He laughs. “I’m good with more than my hands.”
“So true.” I lean my head back against his shoulder and peek up at him. “What are you doing to me?”
“Playing with your tits. I have an obsession with them.”
I chuckle. “Seriously, what are you doing to me? I never thought I would allow someone to do these things to me.”
“We are doing them together. I will never do anything that you don’t want me to do. I care for you, Scarlett. In my own fucked up way, I care for you.” He kisses my forehead, a loving gesture that makes me forget the man who has so much anger inside him.
And I’m falling for you.
When he wants to be sweet, Aiden makes every effort to impress me. The tender moments we share are doing more to my heart than my body. But how much can my mind take? Can I be his submissive forever? Does this sort of arrangement even last forever? I’m too afraid to ask, out of fear I will embarrass myself. Or worse, I could turn him off from going forward.
Could I ever spend more than a few months enduring his punishments? I have my reservations about the longevity of this type of relationship. It’s unconventional.
When we were in college, I had more than a crush on Aiden. My entire world revolved around him. We spent so much time together, all while he hit on me, and I ignored his advances. Our chemistry and the connection we had shared built a bond between us that even now we cannot break. Because of that, I am so screwed when it comes to Aiden. I fear that I will never tell hi
m no.
“How about we go get your things and bring them back here?” Aiden moves his hands from my nipples back to my hips and then smacks me gently on my ass.
I moan because it no longer hurts. Aiden’s hand on my ass feels good now that I have gotten used to him. I don’t mind when he smacks me hard and without warning. In fact, it grows on me more each day.
“We can even give this sleeping in the same bed thing a try.” He releases me from his grasp. “But I can’t make any promises.”
“All that matters to me is that you are willing to try. Baby steps, right?”
He shakes his head at me. “If anyone is mind fucked, it’s me. You might be my biggest weakness, Scarlett O’Brien.”
I lean in to kiss him on the lips. “You already were mine.”
Aiden
Scarlett’s ex wasn’t around when we went to collect her things, which worked out well for all of us. The fucking shithead had her bags and boxes lined up against the wall when we walked through the door. He should consider himself lucky that he wasn’t home for me to bash his skull in for being such a jerk.
Even if he were there, I had promised Scarlett I would behave myself. And I did. I lifted all the boxes and loaded them into my car, leaving Scarlett to wait in the passenger seat. She didn’t have much to move. The entire trip lasted ten minutes before we got back into my Mercedes and drove back to my penthouse.
I reach across the center console to hold her hand against her thigh, locking our fingers together. Being with Scarlett feels so right. For the first time, in a very long time, I want to be with a woman in ways that I never thought were possible.
“Thanks for doing this, Aiden. I still can’t believe we are moving in together.”
“Same here,” I confess, still shocked that I had suggested the idea to her. “I’ve never had a roommate before.”
“We talked about this,” she shoots back. “I am not your roommate.”
“You are my submissive.”
“How about your girlfriend?”
I shake my head. “I don’t do girlfriends.”
His to Break Page 10
