by L. A. Witt
Her gaze dropped, and so did my stomach.
“Lisa . . .”
“I didn’t have a choice,” she said through her teeth. From her tone, she was going for angry defensiveness, but what really came through was shame and desperation. “I can’t come running to you every time I need money.”
“So you went with a loan shark?” I snapped. “I know you don’t like coming to me, but at least I won’t threaten you or our daughter if you don’t pay me back on time!”
“I know. I know.” She patted the air with both hands and met my eyes again. “This is the first time in a year I’ve had to go to him, and it’ll be the last. I promise.”
“You said that last time.”
“I know. But I’m settled into the new place. Once this is paid for, I’m good.”
I pursed my lips, but sighed. “All right. But next time, would you please come to me first?”
Her cheeks darkened, and she nodded. “Yeah. I’m sorry.”
“Do you need any money now?”
“No.” She swallowed hard. “No, I’m taking care of it. That’s why I need you to take Em.” She glanced at Emily, and a smile played at her lips for a second. “It’s only for two nights. I promise.”
I scowled. And felt guilty as fuck. It had been too long since I’d taken Emily for the weekend anyway, because my job had been so chaotic. And with some threats coming in from various dirty cops and their families, I’d been uneasy about having my little girl with me.
But things had settled somewhat. There was still no shortage of hostility around the precinct, but I hadn’t received any threats recently. Hell, as we’d walked out today with Emily, there’d been a few dirty looks, but no one had said anything. It was an unspoken rule—you didn’t mess with a cop’s family. That was why they all hated me. I’d ratted out a bunch of cops and fucked over their families in the process, even if they had been dirty cops. So no matter how much everyone hated me right now, Emily was off-limits.
“All right.” I exhaled. “But if you need help, just say so, okay?”
She nodded. “Thank you.” Slowly, her expression softened, and she actually managed a weak smile. “She’s been wanting to spend time with you lately anyway.”
“I know. And when this damn case is over, I definitely want to take a week or two off and spend it with her. If that’s okay.”
“If it’s okay?” she sputtered, and laughed dryly. “Andreas, she’s your kid too. I want you to spend time with her.”
“Me too, believe me. I’m sorry I’ve been—”
“I get it. Just go. Enjoy some time with her.”
“I will. And . . . be careful, all right? These guys are shady as—”
“I know.” She stepped closer and hugged me gently. I returned her embrace, but said nothing.
As she headed back to her car, I slid into the driver’s seat of Darren’s.
“Daddy, can we get lunch? Mommy said you’d take me to McDonald’s.”
I laughed. “Did she?”
“Yeah.”
I glanced at her in the rearview, and damn if I wasn’t a sucker for that smile. Chuckling, I started the engine. “All right, we can stop.”
“Yay!”
Beside me, Darren smothered a laugh.
“What’s so funny?”
“Nothing.” He schooled his expression, but failed miserably, and the smirk broke through. “I’m . . . Nothing!”
“Uh-huh.” I backed out of the parking space and headed out of the garage. Darren wisely kept his trap shut while I searched for a McDonald’s. Lisa probably had promised Emily I’d take her—it amused her to no end how I couldn’t say no to my little girl, even if it meant eating at a godawful place like that.
Fifteen minutes after we’d left the precinct, we walked into the McDonald’s, and I tried not to gag on the smell of fry grease.
“Food snob,” Darren said under his breath.
“Don’t tell me you actually like this shit?”
“Oh, come on. It’s not that bad.”
I just rolled my eyes. When we reached the front of the line, I ordered Emily a Happy Meal, and after Darren had ordered something, I settled on an iced tea. Truth was, I didn’t really mind the food here. I wasn’t keen on the smell or the décor, but the food was better than a kick in the head.
My gut was in knots, though, and I wasn’t sure I could stomach much of anything heavier than a cold drink.
We took our food out to the play area, and after we’d eaten, Emily trotted off to join some other kids on the brightly colored playground equipment.
As soon as Emily was out of earshot, Darren quietly asked, “So what’s going on?”
I sighed. “My ex is in some money trouble. She says she’s got it handled, but . . .” I grimaced.
He studied me. “What kind of money trouble means she suddenly needs you to take the kid?”
“Exactly the kind you’re probably thinking of.” I rubbed my eyes. “Shit.”
“She in trouble? Like, actual trouble?”
“I hope not.” I dropped my forearm to the table and watched Emily playing with some other kids in the ball pit. “Thing is, back when she was using, she got tangled up with some loan sharks. And she knows they’re not good people, but if she gets into a bind, she’ll go to them. Which is usually okay—”
“Unless she can’t pay them back.”
I nodded. “That’s what I’m worried about. She insists she can pay them and she’ll have it taken care of in the next couple of days, but . . .”
“Shit. Anything we can do?”
I eyed him. “‘We’?”
“Um. Yeah.” He shrugged as he slipped his straw between his lips. “We’re cops. They’re loan sharks.” He gestured like do the math.
“Oh. Right.”
“And yes, badges aside, if there’s something I can do . . . tell me.”
“I’m not sure there’s much either of us can do. I’ve told her a hundred times to come to me if she needs money.” I paused, reaching for my drink. “But . . . thanks.”
He flashed a faint smile. “Don’t mention it.”
“I appreciate it.” I glanced at Emily again and sighed. “Fuck. This is definitely not what we both need right now. With the case and everything else . . .”
“Actually, maybe it is what you need. Or, hell, what we both need.”
I faced him again. “What do you mean?”
“Well, our case is at a standstill. We’re getting nowhere. Maybe we need a break so we can come back and look at it with fresh eyes.”
I scowled. “An evening to decompress is one thing. An entire day? Possibly two?” I glanced at my daughter, and guilt tightened my chest. “Don’t get me wrong—I want to spend time with my kid. All my kids. But this case . . .”
“Andreas.” He leaned forward, pressing his elbows onto the plastic table. “The investigation is still moving even without us. Paula’s on top of it. She texted me a little while ago and said she’s sending some uniforms out to canvas neighborhoods, talk to people connected to the various victims . . .” He waved his hand. “Things are still happening. Taking a breather to make sure your kid is all right doesn’t really seem like too much to ask, does it?”
“Fair enough.” In theory, I could have told him to stay at work and continue on the case, but admittedly, I was glad he was here. He’d been brittle enough last night that I wasn’t ready to let him out of my sight yet. “Well, we still have some notes back at the apartment.”
“Back at my apartment.” His brow creased. “I mean, she’s welcome to stay at my—”
“No, no. I’ve got a bedroom for her at mine.” I paused. “If . . . you want to stay there, you certainly can.”
“Even with your daughter there?”
I nodded. “She’s seen her mother date. She knows that’s a thing.”
“But . . . a man?”
I shrugged. “At her age, she has no reason to question it. I’d rather make it a normal thing no
w than—”
A shrill cry jolted my attention away from the conversation, and I got up so fast I cracked my kneecap against the bench.
Emily was sitting beside the bright-yellow plastic slide, holding her shin and sobbing.
“Hey, hey.” I crouched next to her and scooped her onto my lap. “What’s wrong?”
“I fell down!” She gripped the front of my shirt in her free hand. “It hurts, Daddy!”
“Okay. Okay. Let me see.” I rolled up her pant leg, and there was a small red mark on her shin, but nothing serious.
“It hurts!” she moaned again.
“I know. Come here.” I hugged her close to my chest. There was no point in insisting she was okay, so I just held on to her for a minute and let her cry. Chances were, she’d scared herself more than anything, and she’d be all right in a minute or so.
As she calmed down, I loosened my embrace and wiped her tears away with my thumb. “Does it still hurt?”
Her lower lip jutted out, and she nodded.
I frowned. “Well, we should probably go, then.”
Her eyes were suddenly huge, and darted toward the playground equipment. “But . . .”
“I don’t want you getting hurt again. If it’s that bad, we should—”
“No, I’m okay.” She got up and jumped a couple of times. “See? I can play!”
“Are you sure?” God, it was hard to be serious.
She nodded.
“All right.” I kissed her forehead, then shooed her toward the playground. “Be careful, okay?”
“I will!” With that, she was gone, running like she’d never been in pain at all, and I finally let myself chuckle.
As I returned to the table, Darren’s lips quirked again, just like they had after I’d given in to coming here in the first place.
“What?” I asked.
“Nothing.” He took another sip from his soda. “I just find it insanely adorable to watch you with your kids.”
Heat rushed into my face as I sat back down across from him. “Shut up.”
“Hey, I’m just saying.” He let his toe brush my insole, and when our eyes met, he smiled. “You really have a soft spot for your kids. And . . . it’s cute.”
“Of course I have a soft spot for my kids.”
“Yeah, and of course it’s fucking adorable.” He didn’t even try to fight the smirk. “Who knew Andreas Ruffner could—”
“Zip it,” I growled.
He snorted. As we watched Emily climbing and jumping with the other kids, we both sobered a bit.
“I’m serious, by the way,” I said. “If you want to stay tonight, I’d be happy to have you.”
“You sure?”
I nodded.
“Okay.” He shrugged. “We’ll need to swing by my place so I can get an overnight bag.”
“And collect some of the case files. We might as well get some work done after she’s gone to bed.”
Our eyes locked. A whole different kind of smile started to come to life on his lips, and goose bumps prickled under my shirt. Last night had been the first time in too long. Maybe hoping for two nights in a row made me greedy, but I wasn’t sorry for it.
I pressed my foot against his. It was the most affectionate move I dared in public, and it made him squirm. Hell, it made me squirm.
With everything going on in our world—and dear God, the shit just kept coming—I wasn’t holding my breath that we’d have the energy or be in the mood for anything tonight, but I hoped. And if nothing else, I was glad he’d agreed to stay over. I’d gotten used to having him next to me in bed. Even when our combined body heat made things a little too hot, I could rarely bring myself to put any space between us.
Our case remained at a standstill. Darren’s brother remained in his heartbreaking downward spiral. Now my ex-girlfriend was potentially in some deep trouble, and I needed to take care of my daughter while Lisa sorted things out.
But, as I reminded myself a hundred times a day, Darren was still alive. Still here. Tonight, he’d be sleeping next to me, this time in my bed instead of his.
Maybe none of that would solve a damn thing, but it sure helped me keep breathing.
My phone buzzed on the nightstand. The sun was barely up. What the fuck?
I gently pried Darren’s arm off me and reached for the phone. My eyes hadn’t quite focused yet, but I recognized Erin’s photo on the screen.
I bit back a growled What now? and hated myself for even considering letting it out. I really was a contender for Father of the Year these days.
“Hey,” I said. “What’s up?”
“Hey. So you know those files you had me going through?”
“Mm-hmm.” I sat up, wiping a hand over my face. “Are you already at work?”
“Yeah, I’ve been here for an hour. And, Dad, I think I found something.”
I was instantly awake. “Tell me.”
“It’s . . . kind of easier to see on the printouts, but . . .” Papers shuffled on the other end. “So you had me checking for transactions with the victims and that one employee, right?”
“Right.”
“And most of them did go through his checkout line.”
My pulse accelerated. It was still circumstantial, but it was a start.
“But,” she said, “most of the transactions were small things. Like under twenty bucks. Or they used a debit card. Half the time they used cash and the only reason their name came up is their store membership card was scanned.”
Closing my eyes, I pushed out a breath. “So there’d be no reason to check their IDs.”
“Right. But there’s something else.”
“I’m listening.”
“I didn’t say anything before, because I didn’t want you to think I was wasting time on a wild-goose chase, but I had a thought, and asked Paula to get me another set of printouts from the store. From all the registers.”
I blinked. “Whoa. Nice job being proactive.”
“Thanks.” A smile came down the line, but her tone quickly turned serious again. “So, all those people who you asked me to look for? They’re regulars there. And they’ve been through all the checkout lines a million times.”
Damn it. I scrubbed a hand over my face. Another dead end.
“They’ve all used the customer service desk too.”
I froze. “Come again?”
“Every single one. And they were buying things like cigarettes, or cashing out lottery tickets. Which means—”
“They all had to show ID,” I breathed.
“Exactly. For those transactions, they actually had to hand over their ID and have it scanned into the computer, not just flash it at the cashier.”
My jaw dropped. So we didn’t have a link between Brian and the victims. Not a definitive one where we could see him establishing victims’ ages and addresses. But there was one between the victims and Jim. The painfully cheerful, incredibly helpful Jim, who made my teeth grind and thought Brian was a creepy guy. What the hell?
“Dad?”
I cleared my throat, wondering just how long I’d spaced out as the pieces had tried to fit together in my brain. “Sorry. That’s . . . that’s some seriously good work. Well done.”
She laughed softly. “Thanks. Do you think it’ll actually help?”
“It’s quite possible, yeah.” I glanced at Darren, who wasn’t only awake, he was sitting up and his eyebrows had climbed halfway up his forehead. “We’ll be there as soon as we can.”
After I hung up, he put a hand on my leg. “What’s going on?”
“Erin found a connection in the point-of-sale printouts,” I said. “But not between Brian and the victims—between Jim and the victims.”
Darren blinked. “Jim? You mean that cheerful asshole?”
I nodded. “Yep.”
“That would explain why Brian was still at work after the lineup.”
“It would. Holy shit.” I ran a hand through my hair and blew out a breath. “We’re g
onna have to play this as cool as possible. If Jim’s our man, he doesn’t know we’re onto him, and we need to keep it that way.”
Darren sucked his teeth. “Maybe we should go question Brian down at the store. That’ll keep Jim from thinking we’re on his tail.” He grimaced. “I hate to keep using the guy as a pawn if he’s not our man, but . . .”
“The end might justify the means here.”
“Yeah.” He paused. “What about Emily?”
“I can probably talk Erin into watching her.” At that thought, I couldn’t help smiling. “They’ve both been wanting to see each other, so I can’t imagine they’ll mind. Especially since I think Erin has earned herself a day off.”
It was still early by the time we got to the station, most of the day crew not yet in and the last of the night shift slowly shuffling their way from their desks to their cars. Emily hadn’t wanted to wake up, and neither of us could blame her, so Andreas packed a set of clothes and some food for her—apple sauce, baby carrots, and a baggie full of Cheerios—and carried her from her bed to the car seat, then from the car seat into the station.
He held her like she weighed nothing at all, one hand keeping her seated on his hip, the other splayed gently across her upper back, and every time he pressed an unconscious kiss to her hair, I felt a little like my heart might melt out of my chest. It wasn’t a sensation I’d experienced very often. Vic had been a good parent, but he’d emphasized discipline when I was a kid, not hugs and kisses. I couldn’t even remember how my biological father had been with me. My mother had been the one to lavish us with affection, and I knew I was lucky for it, but it made Andreas’s behavior seem more novel to me.
I’d learned my lesson about how to approach someone who was doing me a favor from Paula, so before we met up with Erin, I stopped to buy her a Coke from the machine in the hall. By the time I caught up with Andreas, he was already in the conference room where Erin had holed up.
“—help me with her today?” Andreas was asking quietly as I joined them. “I know it’s a lot to ask, especially since you really deserve the day completely off, but she’d love to spend some time with you, and Darren and I really need to start looking into the lead you found.”
“Dad.” Erin rolled her eyes. “I’ve only been wanting to see Emily the whole time I’ve been in the city. You’re the one who kept telling me she was with Lisa. Of course I’ll take her for the day.” Wow, the sarcasm was strong with this family. No wonder I liked them all so much.
