“What am I missing?” Jayden asked dryly.
“Context, little brother.”
Jayden glared. Fifteen seconds. Fifteen damn seconds and Asher would forever lord the born first flag over his head.
“Fuck you,” Jayden spat.
Asher stared back, as serious as Jayden had ever seen him. “Sometimes I’m so fucking jealous of you and you have no God damn idea.”
Jayden blinked. Asher, jealous of him?
“You live in this perfect little bubble where nothing goes wrong, while the rest of us have to make do in reality.”
“I live in reality every day. I pay my bills in reality. I go to work in reality. You’re the one living a dream. You think you can do whatever you want with no repercussions. You’ll just talk your way out of it. Well, you didn’t talk your way out of prison, did you?”
“Nope.”
For a moment they stared at each other.
Did it matter why Asher had gotten into the fight?
He’d broken the law.
He’d hurt someone.
That wasn’t okay.
Jayden crumbled first. He was always the one yielding to Asher, anyway. “Okay. Fine. Tell me, why did you beat a man nearly to death?”
“He tried to do things to my future landlord’s kid.”
Fuck.
Jayden closed his eyes briefly.
Kids.
That was Asher’s soft spot. He might not be the guy a parent wanted as a role model for their kids, but Asher was good with them.
“And instead of calling the police, you did something about it?” Jayden could connect the dots.
“The guy used to be a cop, but something happened and he’s not anymore. Other cops didn’t seem to care for him either. I don’t deny that what I did was wrong. I also don’t regret it.”
“So how’d you get out with nothing more than a slap on the wrist?”
“They dropped the charges and I was released.”
“And you did all of that without telling anyone? Without letting Mom know to not worry?”
Asher reached up and grabbed the toothpick. He jabbed at Jayden with it across the counter. “Because I knew you’d do this. You’d make me out to be the bad guy like you always do when you don’t live in reality with the rest of us.”
“I live in reality, Asher. I do. You’re the one living in a dream where you can do whatever you want.”
“Man, do you hear yourself?” Asher shook his head. “How did we grow up in the same place, around the same people, and yet we’re this different?”
“I ask myself that same question.”
Asher glanced away. “Maybe if I was a rule follower like you, it would have been different.”
“What’s that supposed to mean? Stop changing the subject.”
“I’m not,” he snapped. “I’m trying to tell you it’s hard having such a fucking perfect, judgmental asshole for a brother.”
“Right. Right, blame it on me.”
“I’m not trying to. But do you listen to yourself? You aren’t asking any questions. You don’t care why I did what I did or what led up to it. You care about right and wrong. That’s it. And now, because I don’t check off every one of your right boxes, you’re thinking about cutting me out of your life. What about your girl? Brandi? You already cut her out?”
Jayden clenched his jaw harder. He didn’t want to hear her name on Asher’s lips.
“It’s hard to believe someone as smart as you is stupid enough to let a girl like that go. She loved you, man. And you just,” Asher spread both hands, “let it go.”
Blood pumped fast and furious through Jayden’s veins. He wanted to jump over the counter and punch Asher so bad. But he wouldn’t stoop to his level.
“Are you done yet?” Jayden asked.
“You ain’t hearing anything I say so sure. Why put forth any more effort?”
“What do you want to say? What haven’t you said that you so desperately want me to hear?”
Asher paused, studying Jayden for several moments.
“You might have had the presence of mind to react with a cooler head than I did. But you weren’t touched as a kid. You don’t have those dreams, those memories, stuck in here.” Asher tapped the side of his head.
“What? What story are you making up now?” Jayden sighed. He’d never heard this.
Asher snorted and reached into the pocket of his jacket. “I knew you wouldn’t believe me.”
He threw a folded piece of paper across the counter.
Jayden picked it up and spread the photocopy out.
It was a police report dated over twenty years ago. They’d have been—what? Seven? Eight?
Jayden scanned the words, paused and restarted. The nightmare was laid out in stark detail.
“What—why...” Jayden looked up at Asher. “You never told me. Mom never said...”
“You always went to bed when Mom told you. Me? I snuck out. Started watching TV with that woman who lived across the hall. She had a grown son.” Asher shrugged. “Mom maintains she stopped anything from happening to me. Physically. That doesn’t mean I don’t remember the fear. That doesn’t mean that night didn’t change me. So excuse me if I wanted to save one kid from those same nightmares. I’d do it again.”
Jayden gripped the edge of the counter, this time to remain on his feet.
How had this happened right under his nose? In all these years, Asher had never mentioned it? Never brought it up to him?
“Right now you’re wondering, why didn’t he say anything?” Asher perched on the bar stool next to him and sighed. “Either I couldn’t make myself, or I figured you’d tell me it was my fault for getting out of bed.”
“You were a kid.” Jayden gaped at his brother. “How was that your fault?”
Asher tilted his head to the side. “The fact I’m surprised that’s the side you fall on is probably the problem.”
Jayden’s shoulders dropped. Did Asher really think he was that judgmental? If he thought that way, what did the rest of their brothers think?
“Look, I’m not saying you shouldn’t be the way you are. Let’s be real, your rule following ass saved me more times than I can count. But there has to be a bending point. I know you’ll say all your shit about how we’re all a statistic and how we have to be twice as good. But at the end of the day, sometimes you have to meet a human need before the rest of that stuff.”
They descended into silence.
Jayden hung his head, still taking it all in. The anger and fight were gone, leaving gaping wounds in their wake.
How had he been so blind? All this time?
Asher leaned forward, forearms on the marble, and put the toothpick back between his lips. “I expected rough treatment from you. It’s why I didn’t want to involve any of you. The real shame? What’s really fucked up? You breaking up with that girl the way that you did.”
“You told her, didn’t you?” The pain Jayden had pushed aside and ignored flared to life.
“I didn’t mean to. It just kinda came out.” Asher shook his head. “She gets you talking and you just say shit.”
“Yeah,” Jayden whispered.
He knew exactly what Asher meant. Brandi had a way about her that made him talk. And now she was gone.
Jayden squeezed his eyes shut and cradled his head in his hands.
He didn’t even deserve to beg forgiveness.
BRANDI STARED AT THE garage door.
She hadn’t gone out to work on anything since the blow-up on Wednesday. Her feelings were too raw. Then work got crazy. It was now her responsibility to find the new office.
As if she needed one more thing on her plate.
Yesterday she’d spent most of the day on the phone. First with her father then with Grandma and Grandpa, then again with Dad in the evening. She’d always been the type of person who liked to do things, but she’d found so much comfort in talking to people lately. Not to mention Dad had let slip a few details he recalle
d about her mother.
Brandi would pry the story out of him one day. She knew it wasn’t going to be a nice tale, but some part of her needed to hear it.
“You going out there?” Nicole asked.
Brandi glanced over her shoulder. So much for mustering her nerve and doing this in private.
“Actually, are you free?” asked.
“Hm? What’s up?” Nicole crossed the living room to stand next to her.
Brandi blew out a breath, reached out and opened the garage door. The lights were already on, probably from when Nicole took out the trash earlier.
Everything was exactly where she’d left it on Monday.
She stepped into the garage, followed by Nicole.
Brandi had finished with the top part of the hutch with the burn damage. After Jayden mentioned wanting it, she’d picked colors and finishes with his home in mind. For the last two days, she’d wrestled with what to do with it.
It felt wrong to sell the piece. While that might be the logical thing to do, she had a feeling she’d regret it if she did that.
Which meant she only had one option.
“Can you help me deliver this?” she asked.
“Sure. Where we headed?” Nicole glanced down at her leggings and striped tunic top. “Do I need to change?”
“No,” Brandi said softly. “On our way back, what do you say we pick up dinner? My treat.”
Nicole grinned. “Heck yeah.”
Sunday dinner.
Jayden would be at his parent’s place, which meant there was zero chance of running into him.
“Let’s do this.” Brandi grabbed gloves and packing supplies from a bin on the workbench.
Together they wrapped the hanging bar and got it into the back of her truck. Nicole popped inside to grab their things and lock up, never once bothering to ask where they were delivering this to.
Brandi knew Nicole would have something to say once they got to Jayden’s condo. She’d had a lot of opinions lately, which was refreshing. The timing could have been better, though.
“So, any updates I should know about?” Nicole asked as they drove.
“Updates?”
“Yeah, like, did your dad say anything new and insightful? Is Asher coming by again? Has you-know-who reached out at all?”
Brandi mentally braced herself for this conversation. “I think Dad wants me to come visit. He also mentioned getting me in contact with my American half-siblings. I haven’t seen them pop up because he connected with them through a different site.”
“Your dad really got around in college.” Nicole held up her hands. “Not that it’s a bad thing, I mean...”
“He did.” Brandi chuckled. “Listening to him talk about it, I get it. I don’t resent him at all. I mean, how could I? He was a kid making dumb choices. It sounds like he’s really invested in all his kids though.”
“And you. He’s never late. Not even when he calls you in the morning.”
“Yeah.” She smiled.
No, she didn’t know her father well, but she liked the person she was getting to know.
“You think you’d go there?” Nicole asked.
“Without a doubt. I mean, I hope he invites me. I don’t want to invite myself or anything. Would you go on a trip like that with me?”
“Um, in a heartbeat.”
Brandi sighed. “Good.”
She was excited about the potential to meet this new branch of her family, but it was also scary. Before...
Her insides felt as though they crumpled.
Before Jayden gave her those books, she hadn’t known the first thing about India, Sikhs or any of that. It was a culture and world so far removed from her own.
Damn that man.
Why did he have to invade this, too?
“Hey, where are we going?” Nicole’s tone said she already had an idea and wasn’t a fan.
“Just up the road a bit more,” Brandi muttered.
Nicole turned in her seat and stared at Brandi. “Are we going to Jayden’s?”
She let her shoulders slump but kept staring straight ahead. “Yes.”
Nicole sighed and flopped back in the seat. Brandi could feel her displeasure, but she also didn’t want to do anything differently.
Yes, she was angry and hurt. At the same time, she missed Jayden. No part of her had wanted to fall for him, but fall she had. He’d won her over with his honesty and dedication. And now he was gone.
They pulled into the parking lot.
“Are we really doing this?” Nicole asked.
“I’m doing this for me. Because this feels right. If he doesn’t want it, that’s on him.” Brandi released the catch on her seatbelt. “Are you still going to help me? Even if I’m being a dummy?”
Nicole reached over and took her hand. “Yes, you big dummy.”
Brandi sucked down a breath. She would not cry. The time for tears was over. At least she hoped so.
“One hiccup.” Nicole winced. “I need to run an errand after. Can dinner wait a bit?”
“Sure.” Heck, Brandi would agree to just about anything if it meant Nicole would help her do this and get out of here.
“Cool. Let’s do this.”
Brandi steeled herself and got out of the truck. They unwrapped the piece and stood back to admire it sitting there on the tailgate.
“What’s taped to the glass?” Nicole asked.
Brandi stared at the folded over piece of paper she’d snuck into the cabinet when Nicole’s back was turned before packing. “My goodbye note. It’s the closure I need.”
She wrapped her arms around Brandi and squeezed as the first tear fell.
JAYDEN SAT IN HIS car staring at his parent’s house. Did he dare show his face? Was everyone already there?
In the wake of Asher’s confession, Jayden had sat on the sofa for longer than he should have. He’d thought back over everything, trying to see what he’d missed back then. But like Asher had said, Jayden followed the rules. He did what he was supposed to when he was told.
Asher’s disobedience was no reason for anything to happen to him. Not like that.
Children should be protected.
What was worse, Asher had never mentioned it to him. Not then, and not in all these years. If it weren’t for Nicole tracking Asher down, he might have never told Jayden.
Did the others know? What about Mom and Dad? Was it possible he was the only one who’d been left out?
A sleek, black sports car pulled in beside Jayden.
He glanced left at the other driver.
Axl.
Jayden blew out a breath. It was now or go home.
He got out of his car and waited for Axl to do the same.
Jayden mustered a smile. “Look who showered.”
Axl scowled and shoved a hand through his floofy hair. It was curling and almost covering his face now. Combined with the beard and he looked like one of those fuzzy Highland Cows the girls kept cooing over at work on social media.
“Crunch over with yet?” Jayden asked.
Axl closed his eyes, tipped his head back, and his shoulders visibly relaxed. “Finally.”
“Time to do something about the yeti on your face, man.” Jayden held out his hand.
Asher slapped palms and bumped knuckles. “You talked to Asher yet?”
Jayden paused. Did everyone really know? Was it just him in the dark? “He came by my place a little bit ago. Why?”
“Asher said Thursday he was going to take the next four days to stop by. See everyone individually. I didn’t have a whole lot of time to talk with him.”
“What’d he want to talk about?” Jayden shoved his hands into his pockets.
“Just explain what happened. I mean, it sounds pretty straightforward, right? He stopped some dick from messing with a kid. I didn’t realize the kid had been missing.”
Jayden froze. “What?”
Axl blinked at him. “That kid. The boy? Yeah, Asher said the kid disappeared the day
before. His landlady at the place he’s moving to woke everyone up asking about the kid, and Asher went and found him. He didn’t tell you that?”
“We had a different conversation.”
“Oh.” Axl kept blinking. He was likely too sleep deprived to really function beyond showering and shoveling food in his mouth.
“We going to get you fixed up this week?” Jayden gave Axl’s worn-out clothes a once over.
Nothing fit Axl anymore. He’d always been a stoutly built guy, but ever since he got on this health kick with his coworkers, he’d filled out and bulked up a little. But the end result was that his clothes were either a little too small, or so big he swam in them.
“Will you have time?” Axl asked slowly. “The guys all sounded like... I don’t know. I got the feeling something happened?”
“You could say that.” Jayden nodded at the house. “Want to go in?”
“I’m starving. Come on.”
He let Axl go first. With any luck, Jayden could slip in behind Axl and blend into the background. Chances were everyone would be too busy doting on Asher to pay Jayden any mind.
Axl climbed the stairs and opened the front door. He wasn’t met with a chorus of voices calling his name, which meant the family wasn’t in the living room. Jayden sighed and entered the house.
Three of the foster boys sat on the sofa, controllers in hand, staring at the TV. Axl was already poised behind the sofa, staring at the screen.
“Pop a potion. Pop it. Pop it now,” he chanted.
The three boys in turn ignored Axl, too transfixed with the battle on the screen.
Jayden peered through the archway into the dining room where the rest were gathered.
“And then—you’ll never believe what he said.” Kingston stood so Jayden could only see his arm and shoulder. “He said, well, you like Asher so much, go be with him.”
Mom gasped, and Jayden found something on the wall to stare at.
He didn’t recall saying those words, but he wouldn’t count them out either. He’d just been so angry.
The Wrong Perfect Match (Fullilove in the House Book 1) Page 27
