“Will.”
He stopped and looked back at Jesse.
“She’s not too happy with men in general right now.”
“I can be persuasive.” He’d waited a long time for Elly, even when he hadn’t realized that was what he was doing. He didn’t intend to wait any longer. And unlike his younger self, he wasn’t going to sit meekly by. This time, he’d fight for what he wanted—and convince Elly it was what she wanted, too.
Nothing—not his age, not her family, not her efforts to protect herself by pushing him away, not his stupid mistake—was going to stand in his way.
Chapter Fourteen
Elly stared at the rugged mountains of the Wyoming landscape as her truck ate up the miles between Markton and Denver. The angle of the setting sun cast a lovely orange glow over the Rockies.
Her mom, who had been reading in silence for the past couple of hours, closed the book and rubbed her eyes.
“Must be a good book. You looked absorbed.”
“Nothing like a good book.”
“To take your mind off real life?” Elly probably shouldn’t have said anything, but the not talking was getting to her.
“Sometimes.”
Elly returned her attention to the highway. “How can you stand it?”
“I still love your father, honey. Despite the problems years ago, we have a good marriage.”
“Years ago? What about the problems now?”
“They’re the same ones. Just old wounds reopened.”
Elly glanced at her mother. “You knew about the affair when it happened?”
Anne sat without speaking for a few seconds. “Soon after.”
“And you stayed with him?”
“Yes. I loved him, and he loved me.”
Elly shook her head. “Men who cheat on their wives don’t love them.” The words tasted bitter coming out—and like a lie. She’d seen her parents together through the years. Could her father fake love that well?
“People make mistakes,” Anne said.
“Don’t I know it.”
Her mother shifted in her seat, facing Elly more fully. “This about your father or Will?”
“Dad.”
“You sure about that?”
Elly tried to speak, but the words died in her throat.
“What happened?”
Elly listened to the truck’s wheels singing against the pavement. “It doesn’t matter. It’s over.”
“Yeah, I can tell by the way you’ve said about ten words since we left the ranch. The way your heartache has been riding along with us like another passenger.”
“I’m fine. It’s you I’m worried about.”
“I’ll be okay.”
“Mom, don’t try to fool me. I’ve seen how upset you’ve been. I saw you crying.”
“You want to know why I was crying?”
“I already know. It’s obvious.”
“You only think you know. Honey, your father and I both did things we’re ashamed of now. We were young and selfish. And now they’re coming back and hurting everyone we love. And that’s what is making me sad—how this is affecting you and your brothers. Janie. Mark. You all are the innocent bystanders of bad decisions.”
Elly sensed there was more to the story of what happened all those years ago, but she honestly didn’t want to know any more. She’d had enough disillusionment.
Another mile ticked by on the odometer before Anne spoke again. “Why did you and Will break up?”
Elly shrugged. “It just wasn’t working out.”
“Why?” Anne Cody did not give up easily.
“We’re too different.”
“I got the feeling that’s why you liked him—because he’s not like the other guys you’ve dated.”
“For a bit. But rodeo is my life.”
“It’s part of your life. You’re also a talented photographer, a wonderful face to the ranch.” Anne paused. “A beautiful young woman who deserves to be loved by a man.”
“Will doesn’t love me.”
“Did he say that?”
“No.”
“Then what makes you say it?”
“He lied to me, okay? Just like all men lie.” Elly choked on the last word and turned to stare out her side window for a moment before returning her attention to the highway ahead of them.
“What did he lie about?”
Maybe if she told her mom, all the questions would stop. All the questions that hurt because, despite everything, she missed Will horribly.
“He knew about the results of the paternity test and didn’t tell me.”
“Ah. So he didn’t actually lie.”
“Omission is just as bad.”
“Elly, don’t let what happened with your father color your view of all men. Will is kind, hardworking, smart, not to mention very handsome.”
“I know all that,” Elly whispered, her anger at Will dissolving more by the second. “But how can I trust him?”
“Ask yourself why he didn’t tell you.”
She went with the safer of the two answers. “Because Jesse was the one who hired him, not me.”
“Is that what he said?”
Elly nodded.
“I think it’s more than that.”
Yeah, he knew he wouldn’t get what he wanted. But she couldn’t tell her mother that.
The thought ate at Elly as she let it sit there in her brain unspoken. If she set aside her hurt, she knew the accusation felt wrong, unfair.
“I think Will knew how you’d react and couldn’t face it,” Anne said. “That boy has been in love with you since before his voice changed.”
Elly lifted her right hand from the steering wheel. “Am I the only person who didn’t know this? God, how self-centered have I been my whole life?”
“Not self-centered. Driven.”
“I feel like the world’s most clueless person.”
Her mother smiled. “Better late than never.”
“That I feel clueless?”
“That you find love. You do love him, don’t you?”
Elly exhaled slowly. “Yes.”
“You don’t sound happy about it.”
“I’ve ruined it. I said some things. Not nice things.”
“That’s what apologies are for, honey.”
As the sun disappeared below the mountains, taking the orange glow with it, Elly tried to imagine how she could apologize for comparing Will to an adulterer. Did she want to take a chance with Will?
Yes. Her gut—her heart—told her Will wasn’t like her father.
But she couldn’t help wondering if she was just being as blind as her mother had been.
“Do you think Walker and Paula will make it?” Anne asked, surprising Elly with the change in topic.
“Of course. They’re crazy in love.”
Her mom nodded, looking as if she was considering the validity of that argument. “What about Dex and Josie?”
“Yes.”
“Dusty and Maryanne?” Anne was halfway through asking the last question when it hit Elly what her mother was doing. “Every couple is different. They have their own problems, their own ways of getting through them and making up.” Anne lifted the romance novel. “Their own paths to happily ever after.”
Elly watched as her mom opened the book and began reading where she’d left off. If her mom still believed in love conquering all, why couldn’t she?”
WILL PULLED BACK ONTO THE highway after receiving his much-deserved speeding ticket. He didn’t care how many he got on his way to Colorado as long as he caught Elly and made her believe they belonged together.
When the Wyoming Highway Patrol officer passed Will’s SUV and sped away, Will glanced at his cell phone to see if he had service yet. When he saw he did, he called Delia at home.
“If you’re calling to tell me to come to work, I quit.”
He smiled. “No, actually, I might not be in for a few days.”
A tractor-trailer rig passed him, the sound of the big
engine blocking out Delia’s response. “What?”
“Where are you?”
“Between Casper and Cheyenne.”
“You’re working again today?”
“No. You’d be proud. I’m doing something romantic.”
“Oh? Can’t wait to hear this.”
“Prepare to eat that sarcasm.” He paused, an unexpected wave of nervousness washing over him.
“Well, don’t keep me in suspense, Prince Charming.”
“I’m going to Colorado—after Elly.”
“Oh, Will.” All hint of teasing was gone from Delia’s voice. “I’m so glad.”
“Wish me luck.”
“You’re not going to need it. But I fully expect you two to name one of your children after me.”
Will laughed before hanging up. As he drove along the same roads Elly had traveled only hours earlier, he couldn’t stop smiling. He hoped Delia was right—that Elly loved him enough that he wouldn’t have to depend on luck.
ELLY PULLED INTO A GAS station south of Cheyenne. After setting the gas to pumping, she tapped the truck’s passenger side window. “You need to go inside?”
“You go first. I’ll watch the pump.”
Elly wandered into the convenience store to visit the ladies’ room then pick up some candy and soda. As she reached the end of the candy bar aisle, she spotted a teenage couple giving each other googly eyes in front of a display of snack cakes. The picture of young love made her heart contract.
How she wished Will were here now. She’d done a lot of thinking since her conversation with her mom earlier. When she got home, she was going to make things right, tell Will that as crazy at it sounded, she didn’t want to be with anybody else—ever.
She yearned to call him, tell him now. But she wanted to see the look in his brown eyes when she said the words, be able to feel him immediately take her in his arms if he felt the same way.
Elly paid for her purchases and headed back to the truck in time to see her mom end a call on her cell phone and hop out of the truck to remove the fuel nozzle from the truck’s tank.
“Who were you talking to?”
“Nobody. Wrong number.”
Elly stared at her mom because her words didn’t have the ring of truth. Maybe she’d been talking to Elly’s dad and just didn’t want to get into another disagreement about that relationship.
When they pulled back onto the highway, Elly’s thoughts wouldn’t veer away from her father.
“How did you do it?” Elly wasn’t sure she’d meant to verbalize the words, but they tumbled out anyway. “What, dear?”
“Stay with Dad, knowing he’d had an affair? Did you know it was Abigail?”
“Yes, I knew.”
Elly gripped the steering wheel more tightly. “I couldn’t have handled that.”
Her mother sighed and clasped her hands together in her lap. “It was hard, but it wasn’t long before I got pregnant with Jesse. And then the rest of you came along, and things gradually got better.”
“But you’d still see her all the time.”
“She didn’t know.”
“What?”
“Abigail didn’t know your father was married when…they were together. She wasn’t from here. But she broke it off as soon as she found out.”
“But Dad did know.”
“I’m not excusing what he did. I’m just saying it was a difficult time. I wasn’t in a good place after…I lost our first child. Honestly, I teetered on the edge for a while.”
“But he should have been there supporting you, not…” Elly couldn’t bring herself to voice the rest of the thought.
“Yes. But it’s in the past now. We worked through it because we decided there was more positive about our marriage than negative. It was worth saving. Sometimes people do things when they’re under stress that they wouldn’t normally do. It doesn’t mean they don’t regret it and wish with all their heart they could take it back later on.”
Elly glanced at her mom. The feeling she’d had earlier—that there was more meaning behind her mother’s words—tugged at her again. But some sense she couldn’t explain told her not to dig that deep.
“I know it may take some time,” Anne said, “but I hope you’ll find it in your heart to forgive your father. He really does love you and your brothers more than life itself.”
“What about Mark?”
“He doesn’t know him as well. But it’ll come with time.”
A horrible thought made Elly’s hands tighten on the steering wheel. “Did Dad know about Mark all these years?”
At first, Elly didn’t think her mother was going to answer.
“Not for sure.”
“But he knew the possibility was there?”
“Yes. But so did I.”
“How—”
“Leave it, Elly.” Anne’s tone—one part stern parent, one part plea—left no room for argument.
A million questions swirled in Elly’s mind, begging her to ask them. Instead, she stared into the night and tried to figure out what might have happened back then. Why her mother, for some reason, at least partially blamed herself.
ELLY WALKED AROUND THE EDGE of the arena, headed for the bleachers so she could watch Jesse’s practice ride. She and Pepper had already gone through their practice runs, and she was fighting an apathy she’d never known. She still wanted the title, but with everything that was going on in her life the Finals just paled in comparison. She hated that the situation with her family and the fight with Will were jeopardizing her dream, but how was she supposed to turn off those thoughts long enough to ride, and ride well?
When she looked up, a familiar figure stood at the edge of the arena, her left boot and both forearms propped up on the fence.
“Janie?”
Janie turned around and smiled. “Hey.”
Elly rushed forward and hugged her. “What are you doing here?”
“I rode down with Nicki and Mark.”
“Oh.” Elly hated the awkwardness that descended at the mention of his name. The brother they now shared.
Elly thought about Abigail and found she didn’t hate her. By her mother’s account, Abigail hadn’t knowingly done anything wrong. She’d still been single and had no idea Elly’s father wasn’t. And Elly found it impossible to harbor ill will toward a woman who didn’t even have full control of her mind anymore.
“Who’s with your mom?”
Janie looked startled that Elly would even bring up her mother, now that the truth was out there. “Uh, Ruth is staying with her. Mom’s on a new medication, and it seems to be helping some.”
“Good.” She meant it. Elly couldn’t imagine how horrible it must be to feel one’s thoughts and memories slipping away as if they were being erased and leaving a blank page behind.
“Mark’s up,” Janie said and focused on the chute where Mark situated himself atop a red bull named Spitfire.
Elly held her breath alongside Janie as Mark nodded that he was ready. Of course, she’d be rooting for Jesse, but she found she wanted Mark to do well, too. Do well and not get hurt. She gripped the fence as the gate swung open and the bull started bucking.
Elly couldn’t take her eyes off Mark, willing him to have a safe ride. Trying to recast him in her mind as her brother. She found it wasn’t too much of a leap from how she’d always thought of him.
The buzzer sounded at eight seconds and Mark made a safe dismount.
“That would get a good score,” Elly said. She glanced over to see Janie beaming with pride.
“I hope so.”
Elly heard the hopes and dreams of the entire Hansen family in those three little words. Shame that she’d always had things so easy, that she’d been moping about her own problems when she had so much going for her, had her stepping back. “You want a Coke?”
Janie glanced at her, confusion in her eyes. “Jesse’s up next.”
“I’ll be back in time. He takes forever and a day in the chute.”
/>
“Okay, sure.”
Elly headed for the concession area, needing a few moments alone. She tried to picture the months ahead, how Mark would fit into her family, how much he might want to—or not. When she really thought about it, she could picture everyone eventually coming to a sort of peace with the situation, accepting Mark and what had happened.
Except maybe Jesse. Even before the paternity issue, those two had a simmering animosity toward each other. Sure, she’d thought it might be lessening after the Oklahoma City Rodeo, but that was before sibling rivalry had been added to the mix.
Elly shook her head as she turned back toward the arena with two drinks. She needed to just let it go, let Jesse and Mark deal with their own issues. She had plenty of her own.
As she approached Janie, her friend didn’t notice her. Something about the look on Janie’s face caused Elly to stop and stare. It looked like…longing.
Elly redirected her attention to where Janie was staring so intently, and it landed on Jesse. She glanced back at Janie and felt as if she’d taken a jolt from a cattle prod. How long had this been going on? On their getaway weekend, had Jesse been the one Janie was thinking about? Why hadn’t she told Elly?
Was this something else that had existed right in front of her nose for a long time without her realizing it?
Elly’s heart broke a little. Did Janie think she didn’t have a chance with Jesse because of who she was? Be cause of his long-standing rivalry with Mark? After all the recent revelations, did she feel the possibility was even more remote?
Jesse came out of the gate riding a huge gray bull. But Elly kept her eyes on Janie, watching as tension radiated from her like summer heat off the highway. How torn up must Janie be inside to want her brother to do well but also the man who was his chief rival—the man she so obviously cared about?
The bull tossed Jesse after only about five seconds, and he quickly rolled out of the way of those dangerous hooves. He jumped to his feet, not looking the least bit happy.
The tension flowed out of Janie as she dropped back off her toes and turned toward Elly. She froze, her eyes widening as she realized Elly had seen everything.
Not wanting to cause Janie any further anxiety, she smiled and walked forward, extending the soda. “I think I’ll steer clear of him for the next few minutes. I’m sure what he’s saying would light my hair on fire.”
Elly: Cowgirl Bride Page 15
