I might as well put these rags to good use before my belly pops…or splits open.
I snagged another workout outfit and two bikinis—clothing like this didn’t take up much room—and then headed to where Kuro had dropped my army pack before he went outside to wait. Only my pack wasn’t where he’d left it.
The sound of screeching metal had me spinning around to survey the expanse of the dark storage room. I’d been relying solely on my newly acquired vision to see down here. I saw beyond the rows of shelves and racks of clothing all the way to the opposite wall some fifty feet away, and I detected nothing. But that didn’t mean someone wasn’t down in the basement with me. There were plenty of places to hide.
I heard another faint noise, a muffled sigh of sorts, which got my feet moving. As I passed a weapon’s shelving unit, I snagged a Glock G-19 and flicked off the safety. There was no such thing as an unloaded weapon in the Dead Days.
I aimed the gun ahead of me, checking each row of shelves as I went. By the time I’d covered the entire place, I was back at the tub. Sitting off to the side, exactly where Kuro had dropped it, was my faded army pack.
I shook my head, wondering if I was truly losing it or if someone was playing games. Most likely the mystery of the disappearing pack had been the latter. I immediately thought of Anouk. She made no effort to hide the fact that she hated everything about me, even more so now that she knew Halloween and I had been intimate and would forever be tied to one another by a child that she believed to be his and mine alone. Hopefully Ben’s contribution wouldn’t be completely lost in the strange mix.
Will it look more human? Like Ben?
Tucking the gun into the waistband of my shorts, I turned the pack so my back was to the wall for a thorough inspection. I half expected a venomous copperhead to strike as soon as I opened it up. Nothing. Everything appeared to be neatly in place, nothing tampered with. Jamming the new items inside, including the Glock, I cinched the top and hefted the weighty load onto my back.
I marched out of the storage room without a second look. When Halloween spotted me from the mouth of the cave, he did a double-take. Mission accomplished.
“Hot…” Kuro started to move, but Halloween’s hand clamped down on his shoulder, stopping Kuro before the first clawed-toe hit the ground.
I paused long enough to feel the heat of Halloween’s stare when Lincoln slid up next to me. He took hold of my hands. “The vampires let Ben, Duncan, and Tilly out of the panic room early so you could say goodbye. They’re waiting outside.”
I stepped into the night and cringed at the sight of my loved ones lined up in a traditional receiving line with vampire bookends, though why it bothered me I didn’t know.
One by one I met the grim faces of the people I once considered family. I decided to go to Duncan first. I shrugged off my pack to embrace him. “I’m so sorry, Duncan. I hope you can forgive me,” I whispered as softly as I could, knowing full well nothing was concealed from vampire ears.
His arms crushed me to his ample belly, his lips close to my ear when he answered. “Don’t sweat it. Are you sure you have to go? Isn’t there anything we can do to change this?”
I had a feeling that, if I asked him to take up arms against Halloween and his posse, he would immediately. I felt the poke of the gun he’d tucked into the front of his jeans.
The word “no” caught in my throat. I couldn’t answer. I choked it down and shook my head. I’m not even sure which question I had answered. He probably didn’t know either.
Lincoln was talking to Tilly. Their words were mumbled until he let out a high-pitched squeal. “I’m going to be an uncle!”
Holy crap! Tilly told him I’m pregnant.
I spun around, but to do what I don’t know. The feelings I had weren’t pleasant. Tilly met my pursed lips and dark glare with the familiar sass of a shoulder shrug. “You need his help, Leo, just as much as he needs yours.”
Who does she think she is? Fuck you, Tilly! You have no right…
I was about to speak my mind when I realized how ridiculous it was to hold a grudge. We were never going to see each other again.
I love Tilly. I’m happy she has her sight back. So what if she didn’t share the news with me. She can run, fight, lead, and protect the others. I have to let it go.
When I smiled, Tilly smiled back. Then she reached out and pulled me into a firm hug. “You are my daughter in every way that counts. Take care of yourself, Lincoln, and that baby of yours. I have Orrin’s word, and I believe him—he’ll do right by you.”
When did they make nice?
I hugged her back and allowed the tears stinging my eyes to fall. Do right by me? What does that even mean?
Lincoln hopped up and down, his excitement more than a little hard to comprehend. It’s as if he didn’t know we were leaving home, never to return, with a pack of blood-sucking vampires. Tilly eased back, holding me at arm's length to lock her pain-filled eyes on mine. She wasn’t ready to let me go.
But I’m already gone.
Lincoln splayed his hand over my belly button. “Can I name it?”
“Umm… I…” I had nothing.
Surprisingly, Kuro was the one who answered for me. “A good uncle always takes the honor of naming the baby. What do you think of the name Vlad?”
Kuro’s still an asshole.
Lincoln wrinkled his nose. “Nah, I like the name Thor, or Peter… Maybe Bruce Wayne. Sis, can we name the baby Batman? Oh, but if it’s a girl, I like the name Princess Leia.”
Lincoln was still running through the names from every super-hero story I’d ever told him when Ben stepped forward. Snagging my hand in his before I had a chance to pull away, he said, “I like Leia.”
I shook my head, again. “It’s a boy. And his name will be Alexander.”
Ben smiled, though his eyes glistened with obvious pain. He wrapped his arms around me, and I held on because I didn’t know what else to do. Benjamin Alexander was the father. The least I could do was let him know his son would be named after him. Except I hadn’t planned on telling him, much less attaching a name to the thing growing inside me. But there it was, and I had no idea why I’d done it.
Ben buried his face in my hair. “You should have let me die in that alley. It would have been easier than this… Oh god, I love you so much.”
“Me, too,” I mumbled, but nothing else came out. All the things I should have said to him were frozen somewhere in my unfeeling heart.
My mind went numb a single second before a cold vise clamped on my elbow and attempted to pull me away from Ben’s warmth.
CHAPTER THIRTY-ONE
My first reaction was to fight Halloween. It didn’t help that, when Ben felt Halloween pull me away, he held me tighter. I didn’t want to leave the radiating warmth of his embrace.
Then I remembered. I’m supposed to be submissive and obedient. Halloween and I had a new “deal.” I had a new role to play, though I never expected him to actually use my brother as leverage. One glimpse of Lincoln over Ben’s shoulder and I knew I couldn’t risk embarrassing myself or scaring Lincoln by challenging Halloween in front of the others.
I released Ben, and at the same time Halloween jerked me out of his quaking arms. So many layers of hurt registered on various levels. Layers of pain, levels of torture… I’m in hell. Who knew the loss of free will could be more damaging than walking out on your loved ones. Except if I had to give up my brother… That would truly kill me. This arrangement, as long as Linc is with me, I can live with… I think.
Halloween snatched my pack off the ground and tucked me to his side. After a nod to Ben, Halloween turned me toward the dark woods. “Dagon and Anouk, take point.”
The two vampires walked past stiffly, taking the lead without a word. But Anouk couldn’t resist a sideways glance. I’m certain my chosen attire, or the lack of attire overall, affected her more than anyone else.
This is it.
Halloween steered me away from the bunke
r, my home, my family—everything I’d cared about since the world ended.
My parents were dead, both buried not far from where we walked. I’ll never visit their graves. An exposed root caught my left foot and I stumbled, but the cold, hard strength of Halloween kept me from falling.
I’m taking my baby brother to an island full of vampires where he’ll be subjected to feedings. And in the near future I’m going to give birth to a hybrid abomination.
The turmoil I suffered should have crippled me, but my feet kept moving, one in front of the other. I dragged my heart behind me, hoping it would snag a rock or a bush, anything to keep me from leaving. But my heart was useless as an anchor.
When we were passing the courtyard gate and about to enter the night-drenched woods, I stole a quick glance over my left shoulder. Ben was on his knees with his head in his hands, and Duncan and Tilly were huddled close, obviously trying to console him.
I saved his life only to break his heart.
A breath caught in my throat. The painful lump of air refused to move up or down, and I coughed in an attempt to clear my throat. It didn’t help.
Our goodbyes were too short. Not enough had been said. I hadn’t told Ben how I really felt, nor had I forgiven Tilly. She might have known, but the words were never spoken. I didn’t tell them all how much I’d miss them. Nothing about leaving felt right. I don’t want to go. I thought I could do this… I can’t.
I stumbled a second time. Again, Halloween was there to steady me. He looked at me with a single raised brow. I wondered if he had any idea what this was doing to me. I tried to focus on the woods in front of us. Dagon and Anouk had moved so far ahead that they were no longer visible. A few feet to my left, Lincoln was riding Kuro's branded shoulders. He was chuckling over something Kuro had said as he attempted to catch fireflies, playing like a kid without a care in the world.
He’s such a sensitive boy, and he hasn’t shed a single tear. Linc’s all cried out. My father broke him.
Then my feet stopped working. Halloween gave me a nudge in the center of my back, which was like hitting an off switch and I collapsed, my knees slamming to the hard ground. There was nothing: no air to breathe, no woods to see, and not a whisper of sound to be heard. My tears were there, boiling lava behind my eyes, but I refused to let them go.
I have to be stronger than this.
I am stronger than this.
“Run!” The shout assaulted my ears like a foghorn strapped to my skull. Blindly, I struggled against my pain-soaked body to get to my feet. Once I stood up, my vision returned. In the vivid night shadows of the woods, Halloween offered me a glowing light stick. “Take it and go.”
He’s not really giving me permission to run away?
I brushed the dirt from my bare knees. The worst of my panic had receded. “And go where?”
Halloween stretched his massive arms wide. “Wherever you want. Run it out.”
He’s right. I do need to run.
My legs were suddenly ready to move. I snatched the light stick from his hand and darted through the trees. I’m not far…
I would run over the hill with the collapsed hunting cabin, then another half-mile or so and I’d reach the sandbank just before the first set of river rapids.
Racing through the woods, I realized the light stick wasn’t necessary. I threw it away and kept barreling ahead. I sailed over fallen trees, boulders, and overgrown vegetation. I no longer worried if Halloween knew my secret or not. He’d find out about my improved vision eventually. Feeling invincible, I ran harder, faster, with nothing but the white stars twinkling through the treetops to guide me.
This is better.
I knew Halloween had to be following, but he was keeping enough distance between us that I couldn’t see or hear him. He was allowing me a private moment, and I appreciated the gesture. If he reads me this well already, life with him might not be so bad.
The sounds of lapping water on a gritty rock shore traveled over the hill. Somehow I’d overshot the rapids, and I flew over the highest mound and careened down the other side to envy the reflection of the night sky on a softly flowing river.
I paused to take a deep, cleansing breath. After stripping off my running shoes and ankle socks, I headed straight for the water. The need to get wet was all-consuming, an opportunity to wash away the fear and regret. Four steps into an icy river and I was right again. I went deeper, up to my thighs. I splayed my hands over the top of the water to feel the lazy current run through my fingers.
I knew what I had to do, what I would do to stay true to my word and keep Lincoln from ever hurting again. I’d never expected that things would turn out this way. Family and survival were always the most revered things in my life, but somehow, through all the chaos and doubt, I’d fallen for Halloween.
Movement on the opposite bank caught my attention. I only saw it for a brief second, but it was big, stark-white, and very fast. The hind-end of a deer, maybe, or a white cow. There were still a few cattle loose in the mountains.
Except cows don’t move like that.
I walked through the water, edging a little closer to shore, and stared up at the crisp night sky. The rush of cold water slipping over my bare legs felt almost heavenly. Curling my toes into the sand and pebbles that made up the riverbed, I imagined Lincoln and me sailing off into the sunset to live on Halloween’s island utopia.
Linc’s never seen the ocean or been on a boat.
A twig snapped on the opposite shoreline. I wasn’t alone, and I doubted that Halloween would have crossed the river. Whatever I saw earlier was still there. I surveyed the shoreline. Nothing. Just as I went for my tossed shoes and socks, I heard another noise.
A whisper.
I stopped, half-in and half-out of the river.
“Leo.”
No!
As I spun around I lost my footing on the algae-slick rocks and fell forward. I got my hands out in front of me before I landed face first in the shallow water.
“Daddy still loves you.”
I whipped my head up, wrenching my neck in the process. Two burning red eyes peered out from beneath a long line of thick bushes.
Impossible!
“I’m not crazy. I saw him. Vincent is alive.” I finished tying my shoe and shot upright.
Halloween did a quick sidestep to avoid my head crashing into his chin. “Leo, he’s gone. You tossed your light stick. You probably just saw a possum in the bushes.”
“I know what I saw.” I rubbed my aching neck. When Halloween said nothing in return, I stormed up the riverbank.
My father is alive and possessed by a vampire.
Halloween not only failed to believe what I saw in the woods, he also refused to recognize the betrayal. Kuro and Dagon had lied to him, but I wasn’t nearly as gullible. I saw my father. I had not only heard his voice but watched the unnatural rise of his body from the bushes, the moonlight glimmering off his ghastly white skin.
“It wasn’t a ghost.”
Halloween’s hand closed around my wrist and he pulled me to a stop. “Leo, you’re stressed past your limits. You just experienced what I suspect was some sort of panic attack. It’s not that I don’t believe what you saw, but are you sure what you saw was real?”
Not when you put it like that…
Halloween gently stroked my hand. “I can assure you that spirits do exist.”
“Great. I’m being haunted by the ghost of my psycho father.” Craving Halloween’s cooling touch, I leaned against him.
“I won’t allow him to torment you. This will be the last you see of Vincent Marrok.” Halloween placed a single kiss to the top of my head and secured me in a strong embrace.
“Do you have some power over ghosts, too?” When I spoke my lips brushed against the spot just below a thickly defined pectoral muscle.
“We’ll soon find out.”
Halloween held me under my arms and lifted me up to meet his strangely handsome face. Two bright-orange rings surrounde
d dual shimmering pools of ink. His eyes are beautiful.
I wrapped my legs around his waist, enjoying the feel of his firm muscles and smooth skin against my inner thighs. The tips of Halloween's fingers ran teasingly over the hem of my shorts as he cupped my bottom. I melted into him, remembering what we had done the night before, and I secretly wished we were back in the closet.
Halloween closed his eyes. A soft groan escaped his lips. “We have a long way to go before dawn.”
I had a hard time taking my eyes off his mouth. But when I finally moved to get down, Halloween stopped me with a hard squeeze. “I prefer you stay right where you are.”
Maybe he was having similar ideas about our closet. But my lustful thoughts were a betrayal. How can I think of sex with Halloween while still mourning the loss of Ben?
I placed my arms around Halloween’s neck, curling my fingers through the silken strands at the nape of his neck.
With one arm supporting my backside, he reached down for my pack with the other. “Get some rest. You have to be our eyes and ears during the day now.”
I gave him a slight nod and then nuzzled into the nook of his shoulder. Halloween didn’t seem to mind the extra weight of me and my pack as he ran full-speed into the night. Somehow I managed to strike all thoughts of him and Ben from my mind.
Dead Day # 1,459
The voices were against me leaving a note for my daughter, but they have less control over me now. I’m getting stronger, stronger than they ever thought possible. They will bend to my will, not me to theirs. While Leo bathed in comfort and then dressed in the clothes she once wore to train for a race, I watched from the shadows. My improved vision allowed me to appreciate her beauty even more: long legs, firm muscles, flowing hair that looked like spun honey and gold, and piercing green eyes. She looks so much like her mother.
I placed the message in her pack. A small red bottle she’ll no doubt recognize with my handwritten words tucked neatly inside. The voices thought I was giving her an advantage, but they fail to see the bigger picture. She needs to be punished, needs to live in fear of the day I’ll return to take her child and her brother, to take away everything she loves. Once the note is discovered, the weight of her worry will grow. It will crush her from the inside out. She’ll be no match for me.
The Dead Days Journal: Volume 1 Page 23
