by Nina Bruhns
He squirmed in his seat, his hip brushing hers as he tried to make more room in his suddenly tight jeans. Her gaze dropped, landing squarely on the obviously swollen ridge of his sex.
"Forget it, sweetness," he quipped. "A couple more days and you can have your wicked way with me. But until then, it's no dice. Doctor's orders."
Her mouth quirked in a failed attempt at looking stern. He imagined how it would taste if he just leaned over and covered that luscious mouth with his. The tip of her tongue brushed the succulent swell of her lower lip. He looked up into her pretty blue fire eyes, watching them lower shyly to his lips. He steeled himself against the urge to kiss her, nearly losing it when the truck hit the bottom of the driveway and her curves jostled softly against his side.
He jammed the truck into gear and took off with a lurch. Could it be Rini was reconsidering their agreement?
It was a long drive to Rincon, nearly two and a half hours, even clipping along the inland route and avoiding the beach crowds. The California freeways were fast and efficient that morning. Colorful magenta ice plant and yellow daisies grew along the sloping sides, in riotous spring bloom.
Cole rolled down his window, slipped a slow, mellow jazz CD into the player and stretched his right arm out along the seat back. With his black truck freshly. waxed, his woman nestled by his side and the smell of talcum powder wafting over from his slumbering baby boy, Cole figured life couldn't get much better than this.
Rini's head dropped gently against his shoulder and he circled his arm around her, pulling her close as she fell into an untroubled sleep. Well, he mused, maybe life could get a little better. But he was working on that.
He glanced over at her and Chance—his family. He'd found a peace and contentment during the past weeks that he would never have imagined possible. All because of this woman. He couldn't conceive of life without her anymore. Even without sex, Rini had shown him more love and devotion than any lover had even come close to giving.
In a hot rush of panic he realized just how much she had come to mean to him, how much he needed her. Every day and in every way. He couldn't take it if she left him.
He hoped like hell if he could get Rini to make love with him, he could bind her to him forever. That had to be the key. Mark her again and again as his, and only his. Make her dependent upon his touch, fill her body with a need so potent she couldn't sleep at night if he hadn't relieved it first. Only him. He would give her such pleasure she'd never, ever think of leaving him.
She stirred at his shoulder, rubbing her cheek against the soft nap of his shirt, and instinctively his hand moved to caress her hair and neck. He wondered what it might be like if he could really open his heart and allow himself to love her. The thought terrified him, but he had made a vow to try. He owed her that much.
Irrational fear crawled up his spine. She had abandoned him once. And she'd barred him from her bed. How could he trust her with his heart? Still, he was determined to face his demons. For her.
As he held her tight against him, he told himself he could surely trust her, now. She had married him and had thrown herself into caring for him and the baby without a backward glance. He knew she loved Chance with all her heart, and on their wedding night she'd hinted that she loved him, too.
He pulled into Tanya's driveway filled with new resolve. He had to make Rini need him. Just him.
Only then would he feel safe enough to love her.
* * *
Chapter 14
« ^ »
When Cole swung open the wooden screen door to his cousin's house, grabbed Katarina's hand and walked in carrying Chance, the entire Proudhomme clan descended like locusts.
"They're here!"
Katarina's pulse zipped in panic. She hadn't seen so many people of varying sizes, shapes and ages crammed into that small a space since the high school graduation party her father had thrown for her. If Cole hadn't had such a firm grip on her hand she would have turned tail and run.
She could feel her palm grow sweaty against his. Would they like her? Would they ignore her? Would they make comments behind her back?
"Cole! Rini! You made it!" Tanya burst out of a door on the other side of the living room and elbowed her way through the throng, throwing her arms around Katarina in a hug. "Perfect timing! We just lit up the grills. How are you? Everyone, this is Cole's wife, Rini. And this little kihaat—" she swept the baby from Cole's arms before he could protest "—is their son, Chance."
Instantly, Katarina was surrounded. Cousins, nephews and neighbors pressed in to clasp her hand, yelling hellos and congratulations over the din. Their friendliness was overwhelming, and she felt her fear and hesitation fall away like a cocoon.
Glancing up, she saw Cole gauging her reaction as he was also besieged by well-wishers. She grinned. Obviously pleased with that, he winked, then was swallowed up in a swarm of pretty young women.
Katarina fought a sickening surge of jealousy and rotten memories. Suddenly it was like a bad rerun. Giggling, the women crowded close to Cole and whispered in his ear, all the while casting furtive glances at her.
Unable to watch, she swallowed heavily and turned her back. Damn it anyway! She knew she was being irrational. He'd vowed to be faithful to her, and she believed him, in spite of the voice inside asking what reason had she given him to want to be.
Who could blame the girls for flirting? A woman would have to be dead not to react to Cole's tempting virility. Katarina tried not to think about the strange perfume she had smelled on his shirt twice now while doing laundry. Each time she'd firmly dismissed it, telling herself it had been a client or another lawyer he'd brushed up against. But seeing him now, surrounded by women, the old fears flared back to life.
She frowned as he was dragged by the coquettes out into the backyard, where the men were tending the grills and playing soccer. By the time he joined the game they had stripped him of the diaper bag, as well as his shirt, and had formed a cheering squad along the sidelines.
"This is his home," an old woman said, following Rini's troubled gaze out the back window. "It is good that he found us. Good that he brings his family now."
Katarina pulled herself together and looked at the woman. "He found you?"
She smiled, showing a full set of large sturdy teeth. "He was one stubborn chacho. He didn't give up till the agency told him where he came from."
"Yes, he told me he was adopted."
The woman nodded slowly. "One day he will heal." Her wise old eyes searched the room and found Chance, who was being passed around from cooing grandmother to tickling aunt. "Perhaps he has already."
Katarina studied the wrinkled face for a moment, wondering what relation, if any, she now had to the woman behind it. Could this be Chance's biological grandmother or great-grandmother? She didn't dare ask, for fear of overstepping some unknown boundary. If the woman wanted her to know, she would have said something.
But there was one thing she would risk asking. "I know Tanya is Cole's real cousin, and her parents are his biological aunt and uncle. But what about his mother and father? What happened to them?"
With a sad expression the old woman looked away, then rose. "I think they could use our help in the kitchen, hija." She shuffled toward the back of the house.
The back door swung open, and Cole strode into the room, grinning, his arm slung around another man. She checked behind him and sighed with relief. No women.
"Rini!" Cole beckoned her. "You remember my brother, Billy."
"Of course. You were at the wedding. How are you?"
"Came to see my nephew! Where is that little rascal?"
Suddenly, there was a commotion at the front door. Someone was admitted to the house amid a murmur of exclamations.
"That must be Jeff," Cole said with a quick glance at Rini. "The kid I told you about—the one I'm helping to find his father."
Katarina nodded. She thought it was great that he was helping the boy. Before knowing Cole, she'd had no idea how t
raumatic it could be for a child who obviously belonged to a culture different from the one in which he was raised. From the stories he told of how lost Jeff felt, she knew it was important that Cole ease this child's way back to his own culture.
The exclamations became louder as Cole and Billy pressed into the crowd surrounding the new arrival.
"Oh, my God!" Cole and Billy said in unison, catching sight of the boy at the same time. Cole turned and stared incredulously at his brother.
Curious, Katarina glanced down the path that had parted in front of them. "He looks just like Billy!" she murmured in astonishment. An uneasy hush settled over the group.
Cole recovered and came forward, extending his hand. "You must be Jeff. Welcome. I'm Cole."
The boy smiled shyly and mumbled a greeting, but his eyes kept darting to Billy.
Cole stepped aside. "Jeff, this is my brother, Billy." He looked his brother right in the eye. "Jeff's mother is Lindsay Walker."
Billy blanched, and looked from Cole to Jeff and back. "Who, uh…" He dragged a hand across his mouth. "He yours?"
Katarina gasped, her own hand flying to her mouth. "No." Cole's growled answer was instant and certain. She sagged with relief, then caught sight of Jeff and chastised herself. The poor kid looked like he wanted nothing more than to run out the door. Or fly into Billy's arms.
Cole moved to the boy's side and put a supportive hand on his shoulder, facing his brother. "So, nupeet, were you seeing Lindsay about fifteen years ago? You know, about the time I married her?"
Rini's brows shot up of their own volition. That Lindsay? His ex-wife's son! Was that why Cole was upset?
The crowd stirred and a murmur rose and fell as Billy put up his hands in a defensive gesture. "Cole, it wasn't like that at all. You were long gone to grad school. Do the math, big brother."
Cole took a deep breath and squeezed Jeff's shoulder. "Could this boy be your son?"
Billy looked as though he would fall over in a stiff breeze. He nodded. "I suppose he could. I had no idea," he added in a whisper.
Jeff's face became a jumble of emotion. He shuffled from one foot to the other and stuck his hands in his pockets. "Cool," he croaked out, sounding anything but.
Katarina and everyone else in the room smiled. Suddenly, Billy had his arms around Jeff, and they were both laughing and hugging, trying valiantly to hold back tears.
Grinning, Cole propelled them toward the back door. "Bro, I think we've got a few things to discuss. In private." He glanced back at her. "Will you be okay for a few minutes, honey?"
Still smiling, she nodded. "Go ahead. I'll be helping in the kitchen."
She joined the whirl of gossip and activity in the kitchen, preparing platters of spicy chicken, pots of aromatic beans, corn on the cob, salsa and tortillas, happy to have someone else be the center of speculation.
But she couldn't miss the occasional whispered exchange among the women, usually accompanied by a furtive glance her way. It started her wondering why Cole had failed to mention to her that Jeff was his ex-wife's son. Was there something more to this Lindsay than he was telling her?
Katarina finally sat down at one of the many picnic tables that had been gathered from the neighboring houses. Cole slid onto the bench across from her.
"How'd it go?" she asked.
His face split in a smile from ear to ear. "Great. Jeff and Billy are both still in shock, but I can tell they're going to hit it off like chili and cheese." He tipped his chin toward a table where the two were sitting, laughing and talking, but never taking their eyes off each other.
Her heart melted. "What a perfect ending."
"Beginning, I'd say."
She looked back at him and her heart melted a little more. "Oh, Cole. What a beautiful thing to say."
And speaking of beautiful… He was still without a shirt, his bare chest drawing the eye of every woman from nine to ninety. His hair was tousled and he had a cute smudge of barbecue sauce on one cheek. A warm curl of love wound around Katarina's insides. He was so damned sexy. And so damned … good. And she was so much in love with him it hurt.
Unable to stop herself, she leaned across the table to wipe off the barbecue sauce, but found her fingers lingering over the masculine angles of his cheekbone and jaw. He winked.
He was the kindest, most honorable and best-looking man there by far, and he was all hers. She sighed. Let the other women flirt. She knew she'd be the one going home with him.
As if he could read her thoughts, he reached up and caught her hand, caressing her palm slowly with his thumb. Heat pooled in his eyes. She couldn't have torn her gaze from his to save her life. She was utterly mesmerized by the look of desire in it, even as she sensed the people around them grinning and poking each other in the ribs.
Slowly, he brought her fingers to his mouth and lingeringly kissed each one in turn. Every bone in her body grew weak with yearning for this deeply sensual man. He wanted her; it was plain. There was something very primitive and powerful about a man laying such intimate claim to her in front of all those people. If he swept her away to bed at that moment she doubted she would have the will to stop him. Lord knew she wanted him desperately.
Should she give in? Could the secret to his love be that simple? Had the one thing that could ensure his love been staring her in the face all along? It hadn't helped with David. But she was realizing more and more each day that her husband bore no resemblance whatsoever to her former fiancé.
Katarina was still dizzy from the impact of Cole's heated looks and the questions in her heart an hour later when Chance woke up demanding to be fed. Excusing herself, she took the opportunity to retreat with her whirling thoughts into the house.
In a back bedroom, she settled on the bed and tried to concentrate on feeding Chance.
A quiet knock sounded and several female heads peeked in. Oh, no! It was them—the girls who'd been flirting with Cole earlier! What should she do? Could she face them?
"May we come in?"
Without waiting for her answer, five or six young women tumbled into the room and approached her on the bed. Exposed as she was, she felt terribly vulnerable. Fear and uncertainty reared up, unbidden.
In her panic, it didn't quite register that they were all smiling and chattering cheerfully, until they plopped down around her and started oohing and aahing over Chance.
"He is the cutest baby! He looks just like Uncle Cole!"
"Thank you," she murmured, frowning in confusion. They were also much younger than she'd first thought. Why, they were barely out of high school, if that! Suddenly, it struck her. "Uncle Cole?"
"We call him that out of respect. He's not really our uncle."
"He's my second cousin," declared a plump girl with glasses and a long braid. "I'm Marie."
"Well, he's not my cousin, for all the good it did me," said an older girl with a pout. "Rini, you are so lucky to have caught him. He's the dreamiest."
Katarina's brows raised. "Well, I—"
"I'll say," said another with a sigh, a row of silver hoops in her ear glittering in the sun streaming in the window. "Such a hunk." She glanced up and smiled. "For an old guy."
Katarina nearly choked. "He's not really all that old—"
The girl with the earrings nodded solemnly. "Oh, yes. He's way over thirty, you know. Didn't he tell you?"
She couldn't help grinning. Her foolish jealousy evaporated in a puff of welcome and, she hoped, permanent sanity. "He did mention it, yes."
"Well, I still think he's sexy," persisted the pouty one.
"Tell us how you met?" asked another girl.
"Oh, yes! It's sooo romantic!"
Katarina felt a tingle of alarm. "Met? I'm not sure—"
"Tanya said you met in a tepee and it was love at first sight," Marie said. There was a chorus of giggles.
Katarina could feel herself going crimson. She would have to kill Tanya for this.
"We were at that powwow, you know, when he told everyone he'd m
et the woman of his dreams."
Katarina's jaw dropped in dismay. "He said that?" She had run away and left him standing there alone after he'd told these women she was the woman of his dreams? Tears welled up in her eyes.
"Oh, yes. We were all so excited."
"But Uncle Cole had been in his war paint when you were together." Marie grinned knowingly. "So after the dancing you didn't find each other," she continued in a fairy tale voice. The girls all gazed at Rini forlornly. "But he kept searching for you everywhere, for months and months. Finally, he found you by accident—"
Katarina put a trembling hand to her mouth.
"It wasn't an accident," said Earrings, with the conviction of youth. "He was meant to find her. It was fate. Kismet."
The girls gazed up at Katarina, stars in their young eyes. She could almost taste the dreams behind every pair that studied her with hushed awe. Oh, Cole!
"Do you love him very much?" Marie asked.
The innocent question caught her by surprise. She struggled with the giant lump in her throat, swallowing down the need to cry. "Yes, I do. So very much."
The girls let out a long collective sigh.
The pouty girl's pout deepened. "I suppose this means he'll be too busy to keep giving us dance lessons." The fantasy mood was shattered by her accusing tone. "He hasn't been for ages."
Katarina shook herself mentally. Dance lessons. Just as he'd said—but she hadn't believed him, not deep in her heart. Katarina felt like crawling into a hole. Instead she wiped her eyes, drew herself up and looked squarely at the girl. "I'll make sure he starts coming again. Chance and I can come, too. I'd really like to get to know everyone here better. You all mean a lot to Cole."
The girls beamed with pride, and even Pouty perked up. "We like him, too. He's a great teacher."
"Rini, maybe you could talk him into moving back!"
There was a general buzz of excitement over that idea. "Yeah! You're a nurse, right?"
