Mistake Me Not

by Scarlett Finn

  ‘Well, not right this second, you know what I meant.’

  ‘I think you’re wrong,’ Lacie said. ‘He’s not the type.’

  ‘He’s exactly the type. He got me in a vulnerable moment.’

  ‘A vulnerable moment?’ Lacie asked. ‘It’s five am on the east coast – if a man can make time for you at that hour.’

  ‘He was just back from a drunken night out.’

  ‘And he called you?’ Lacie said.

  ‘I think he forgot I was out of the country, it was a booty call.’

  ‘Really?’ Lacie asked leaning back against the headboard as Sorcha did the same at the end of the bed. ‘He didn’t seem to be the type.’

  ‘Are you crazy? He’s sex mad.’

  Lacie blushed and picked at a frayed edge of her crocheted bedspread. ‘You’re a lucky woman.’

  ‘Not really. He hasn’t got any better at it, despite my tuition.’

  Lacie considered this for a moment then frowned at her friend. ‘You must be a difficult woman to satisfy.’

  ‘I’m not that high maintenance,’ Sorcha laughed.

  ‘If he’s calling you now, a whole week after you left town he’s still interested. You’ve been on the phone all week.’

  ‘I stayed with him when you were... I didn’t want to face my parents.’

  ‘You still haven’t told them but you’re going to start showing soon,’ Lacie said. ‘You’re five months gone.’

  ‘I know but what do I do Lace? He’s... the father is...’

  Lacie shifted down the bed and took Sorcha’s hands. They’d already discussed Bruce, and while Lacie knew that Sorcha hadn’t been particularly in love with him the knowledge that the father of her child would never meet their child was sobering.

  ‘It will be ok,’ Lacie said.

  ‘How can it be ok?’ Sorcha asked. ‘I have no father for my child and my best friend is moving to the other side of the planet.’

  ‘I’ll be on the end of the phone. Your parents will support you, and you have a million friends over here, and your man.’

  ‘He’s not my man,’ Sorcha said. ‘He’s messing around over there. I wouldn’t ask much of a partner but fidelity would be on the list.’

  ‘You have to tell your parents, and Ryder will stand beside you. I know he will. He wouldn’t keep in touch with you if he had no intention of being around.’

  ‘With everything so absolutely up in the air... Ryder?’ Sorcha said apparently just having processed Lacie’s words. ‘I speak to Ryder every day and all he’s interested in is you. Why won’t you talk to him?’

  ‘I don’t want to get in the way of anything you two have going on. It’s just not... right. I do appreciate all that he did for me.’

  ‘In the way, what are you talking about?’

  ‘Ryder,’ Lacie said. ‘Your man.’

  ‘You think Ryder is my man?’ she screeched bolting upright. ‘My god! The man is insanely in love with you!’

  ‘What? You were talking about sex with him, staying with him!’

  ‘Shep!’ Sorcha said leaping up from the bed. ‘I was staying with Shep! He’s the dog who’s been screwing around! My god, that isn’t...? Is that why you’re here? Why you left the country?’

  ‘No!’ Lacie said. ‘He didn’t want me after... I don’t blame him for... It’s difficult to go through something like that, and the aftermath is no better. He didn’t deserve to be pulled down by all my... It doesn’t matter anyway I wouldn’t be comfortable with a man who had been with my best friend.’

  ‘I’ve never been with Ryder. He’s your man. He loves you. He was a shadow of himself without you. You are his world, even now when you’re not in the country. He loves you. What would possess you to think he and I had been intimate?’

  ‘Jamie said... it was Jamie Wallace, he...’

  Sorcha came to her side. ‘Consider anything he told you to be false.’

  ‘He told me you were close, and that you... that you and him were...’

  ‘Jamie wanted to hurt you, to hurt Ryder... he’s doing it even after... they got him, he’s locked up, they refused him bail. You have to put it behind you.’

  ‘Just like that?’

  ‘Yeah,’ Sorcha said. ‘Is there any other way?’

  A shout from downstairs had the women leaping from the bed and looking at each other before racing down the stairs to find her mother on the couch while Martin frowned and argued into the phone.

  ‘What happened?’ Sorcha asked.

  Martin left the room still talking on the phone so Lacie and Sorcha joined Ann on the floral pattern couch.

  ‘Elise phoned,’ Ann said.

  ‘What happened?’ Lacie asked gripped with the fear of possibilities.

  ‘Ryder,’ Ann said.

  ‘What about him?’ Lacie demanded.

  ‘They... they’ve arrested him.’

  ‘For what?’ Sorcha asked.

  ‘He was involved; they’re saying he was involved.’

  ‘In what?’ Sorcha asked.

  ‘Lacie,’ Ann said clutching at her child. ‘They say he knew about you, about the money, the fraud, the drugs.’

  ‘How could they think that? And why now?’ Sorcha asked.

  ‘They had a warrant, they searched his home. This happened yesterday. He was arrested last night. Gosh, what do we do? I don’t know what to think, your father is on the phone trying to find out what has happened. Oh my—is it possible we were so completely hoodwinked?’

  Lacie heard the words but the blood rushing through her ears distorted their meaning. Pushing away from the couch, she strode to the window to process the new information.

  ‘I can’t believe this. I thought he was good,’ Ann cried. ‘I thought he was on our side.’

  Lacie left the window and went to the stairs. ‘Lacie!’ Sorcha stopped her in her tracks. ‘Where are you going?’

  ‘To do what’s right,’ she said with her foot on the bottom stair she took her attention to her mother. ‘Don’t ever doubt him again, at least don’t do it in front of me. I owe him my life.’

  ‘How can you be sure he wasn’t involved?’ Ann asked.

  ‘Because we promised no more secrets or lies,’ Lacie said.

  Lacie left it that way and ran up the stairs to pack her new clothes into an old suitcase. She fired up the computer and booked the next flight, which gave her little more than an hour to get to the airport. Throwing her things together, she got back downstairs at the same time her cab showed up.

  ‘You’re going back?’ Sorcha asked. ‘Back to the States?’

  ‘Yes,’ Lacie said putting on her shoes and jacket.

  ‘You said you were home,’ Ann said. ‘That you were saying here.’

  ‘I have unfinished business,’ Lacie said. ‘He didn’t abandon me when I needed him. I can’t abandon him now. Maybe there’s nothing I can do, but maybe there is. This is about me. He’s in this because of me. I have to stand with him. I have to.’

  ‘Wait for me and I’ll come with you,’ Sorcha said.

  ‘No time, I have a flight booked,’ Lacie said giving her mother and friend a kiss.

  ‘I’m not sure I agree with this,’ Ann said. ‘You could be putting yourself in danger again.’

  ‘I can’t think of a better reason I could have to take that risk. Wallace was refused bail and he was the mastermind.’

  ‘And Ryder?’ Ann asked.

  ‘Privacy and loyalty,’ Lacie said. ‘His ideals are mine.’

  ‘Be careful,’ Ann beseeched as the cab honked again.

  ‘I won’t have to be,’ Lacie said. ‘He won’t lose me again.’

  Departing her childhood home was liberating. Now she had a mission to get to his side. The cab driver put her suitcase in the back and then they were on the road to that airport. Why this was so important Lacie didn’t know, she wasn’t sure what her plan was, or what she was going to do when she got there, or even where she was going to stay. But, he was in trouble,
and her soul compelled her body to follow her spirit to his side. Ryder had lost his best friend, he carried guilt about her predicament, and now he found himself in need and alone... but he wouldn’t be for long.

  Lacie got herself checked into a hotel. Every minute before and after her flight she's spent on the phone trying to find out what was going on. Foremost, was trying to find out where Ryder was and how she could get in to see him. After quickly unpacking and a short shower Lacie was changed and in different taxi; this one in another country. This journey took less than twenty minutes and after tipping the driver she looked up at the cloud shrouded jail.

  Not wanting to think too much about what lay ahead she charged on. Security was thorough and took longer than she’d have imagined but eventually she was ushered into a bland grey-floored room with a dozen seats in a row in front of a Perspex screen each divide between the sections was created by grey privacy screens with an old style black phone hanging on one side. She took a seat in the middle and waited.

  The bland off-white walls left the place feeling stark, and cold, and as she sat here alone she squirmed at the odd feeling of being watched though she was totally alone, in body at least. Noises from a part of the room she couldn’t see behind a partition told her that she wasn’t going to be by herself for long. After some clangs and bangs, and a couple of shouts she saw the flash of orange and leapt to her feet. A guard came in with him and stayed against the back wall. Ryder came in close displaying concern and surprise as he stopped on the other side of the clear plastic.

  Lacie lifted her hand in a static wave and he cleared a fraction of his shock to gesture at the unmoveable stool on her side. He sat after she did and neither said a word as they examined each other. He gestured to the phone and she picked up at the same time he did.

  ‘Hi,’ she said.

  ‘I thought you were in the UK. What’s wrong?’

  ‘What’s wrong?’ she repeated. ‘I would’ve thought that was self-explanatory.’

  ‘Have you had trouble? Are you well?’

  ‘Stop it,’ she said. ‘Would you stop looking after me?’

  ‘You’re still not eating or sleeping properly, and you look terrified. If you—‘

  ‘You’ve been asking Sorcha about me?’

  ‘I have. But she didn’t tell me those things. I can tell that by looking at you. No one’s looking after you,’ he said.

  ‘It’s been difficult,’ she said. ‘I’m trying my best but... it’s been difficult.’

  ‘But you’re not telling anyone that you’re struggling. Sorcha hadn’t noticed.’

  ‘You noticed.’

  ‘I noticed that no one’s looking after you. You should have support,’ he said.

  ‘No one has been looking after me,’ she said.

  ‘I can see that.’

  ‘Because I ran away from you,’ she said. ‘Then you got yourself banged up. Who is going to look after me with you in here?’

  ‘I thought that was the point of going back to your parents, I thought they were supposed to look after you.’

  ‘It’s not me we should be worried about right now. Look at you.’

  ‘There’s nothing wrong with me,’ he said.

  ‘Only you could say that at a time like this. Have you spoken to your lawyer? What is Gabe saying? How on earth could you get yourself into this mess? Surely as soon as they told you they had a warrant for SW you should have realised that Wallace would have left something in there. If he’s going down, he’ll take you with him. I spoke to Deacon and he knows this stinks. The only thing connecting you to this is the bag of drugs in the house. The detectives in charge say they’re still collecting evidence. Nevertheless, the DA thinks there is a case. Wallace was refused bail because they said he was a flight risk. You’re not a flight risk. I’ve been trying to get in touch with Gabe, and I’m going to meet Shep this afternoon. I have a meeting with the DA tomorrow. There isn’t a chance in hell that I’ll testify if they’re going to try and use my evidence against you. I won’t do it—’

  ‘Whoa,’ Ryder said cutting her off. ‘Firstly, you’re not going anywhere near Gabe, or Shep. Secondly, you will testify against Wallace because he deserves to rot in hell for what he put you through. I’m tough, if all they can stick me with is a drugs charge I’ll take it as punishment for what I got you involved with – it’s a small price to pay to ensure your safety.’

  ‘I’ll talk to whoever I want to, and you’re not staying here, it’s awful.’

  ‘Yeah,’ he agreed. ‘It is awful. But you’re safe.’ He smiled. ‘After what I lived through when you were missing, the not knowing, the terror every minute of the day not knowing what you were being subjected to... Yes, this stinks but it’s a walk in the park compared to what you went through, or what I did missing you.’

  ‘You’ve given up?’ she asked. ‘You’re just going to take it?’

  ‘I’ve spoken to a lawyer,’ he said. ‘I know I didn’t do what they’re accusing me of.’

  ‘So you trust the system?’

  ‘Not entirely,’ Ryder said. ‘But what’s the alternative?’

  ‘To fight,’ she said. ‘Give them hell, like I plan to.’

  ‘When did you get back into the country?’

  ‘A couple of hours ago; I had to beg them to let me see you today. I’ve got a few ideas, and I’ll let you know how they pan out but... I didn’t want you to think you were alone in here. You should know there are people on the case to help you.’

  ‘I’m not comfortable with you going near the guys. We still don’t know who was involved.’

  ‘I know who was involved,’ Lacie said. ‘And I know who wasn’t. You can’t let Wallace win. You can’t let him take the people you care about from your life.’

  ‘He took the most important person,’ Ryder said. ‘You.’

  ‘I’m here,’ she murmured sliding her hand toward the window. ‘I’m right here.’

  ‘You didn’t ask me if I was involved.’

  ‘I don’t need to ask you,’ Lacie said.

  ‘When did you decide to come back to the US?’

  ‘The moment I heard what had happened to you.’

  His brows drew together. ‘You came back here because of me? You could be at risk here.’

  ‘I missed you,’ she said. ‘You got me through my captivity, I want to try and help you as much as I can through yours... you’re frowning.’

  ‘You didn’t... when you were in the hospital after you were found... You didn’t talk to me. You... I thought you wanted rid of me. I understood exactly why, and no one could blame you for it.’

  ‘I have a lot to work through, I’m not...’ Thinking the words and saying them aloud were different things, and no matter how deep she tried to wriggle into her stool it didn’t make it any easier. ‘I let you down.’

  ‘What?’

  ‘We left; when Sorcha got that call... we were out of there so quickly and... I didn’t want to leave you.’

  ‘Don’t blame yourself for what happened. It wasn’t your fault,’ he said.

  ‘It wasn’t yours either and yet here you are,’ she responded.

  ‘I will get out eventually.’

  ‘That’s not good enough. I want you out now.’

  ‘What difference does when make?’ he said not expecting an answer.

  ‘I’m thinking about your dick.’

  He choked on his own tongue and the guard jerked with his own astonishment.

  ‘I love your mind,’ Ryder muttered when he’d recovered.

  ‘And the way I speak it,’ she said. ‘I spent six weeks thinking about our night, about kissing you, about all the things we didn’t get to do together. You told me you had time to have sex with me then left me hanging. Is that it for you? Are we over?’

  ‘Over?’ he asked. ‘I was giving you space. I thought you needed time to work through what happened. You left the country.’

  ‘You let me.’

  ‘Well, if I’d have k
nown you wanted the big heroic gesture—‘

  ‘That’s not what I’m saying,’ she laughed. ‘I didn’t expect you to stop me. I knew you’d respect my boundaries.’

  ‘So why did you leave?’ he asked.

  ‘Because I was scared, and unsure, and I suppose I wanted normality. I thought if I was over there I could forget any of this had ever happened.’

  ‘You could forget me.’

  ‘That’s not what I said. You weren’t an option for me,’ she said.

  ‘Why not? You had to know I was crazy for you,’ he said.

  ‘I have things to work through, I didn’t want to burden you, and...’

  ‘And?’

  ‘Wallace told me that you and Sorcha were having sex. I didn’t want to make things awkward.’

  ‘And you believed him?’

  ‘I had no reason not to,’ she said.

  ‘How about us? Didn’t you think I’d wait? Sorcha’s not my type, you know that. We both care about you, why would you—sorry, it’s not your fault. Every time I hear about what he did, or said I—‘

  ‘You be careful about what you say in present company,’ Lacie said eyeing the guard who still loitered behind him. ‘Do you know I’ve said more to you about my experience than I have to all of my doctors and therapists?’

  ‘Good,’ he said. ‘I want to help you through it. I want to be here for anything you need.’

  Lacie slid to the edge of her stool and leaned as close as she could while holding the mouthpiece closer to her lips. ‘I want you to hold me. I want to curl up in your arms and forget every second we spent apart.’

  Very slowly the corner of his mouth turned upward. ‘I’ve got my girl back.’

  ‘You’re on that side of the screen and I’m on this one.’

  ‘Are you staying at Sorcha’s?’ he asked.

  ‘I’m staying in a hotel. Sorcha is still at my parents, she took too long getting ready.’

  ‘Phone Deacon, he owes me a couple of favours; he’ll look after you. He’s been a friend over the years and—’

  ‘Your friend? I couldn’t impose on him.’

  ‘It’s not imposing,’ Ryder said. ‘I’d feel better if someone was watching your back.’

  ‘And I’m not welcome at your place?’