Hannah grinned and Ippy smiled back at her. “Yeah. About the windows. Sorry, thought you were talking about something else.”
Now he was confused. Like what?
“Sex,” she replied without looking away from him. He shut up instantly. “Have you ever thought about it?”
He shrugged. A little. I guess. You?
Hannah nodded. “About that much too. It’s been you and me for so long, and since we rescued him I’ve always thought it would be you, me, and Caelum. I guess I just never thought about sharing either of you. I’m not that good at sharing, I don’t think.”
You are with me, he countered, knowing that they shared food all the time and he still had a hoodie hanging up in his closet that he’d borrowed from her. It was old and frayed since it used to be her dad’s, so it was much too big on her, but she liked to wear it sometimes and he’d borrowed it when he was cold and it had been in her trunk.
“Yeah. But could you share me with him? Like for dates and stuff? Like when Aunt Evangeline and Uncle Oliver go out with just the two of them?” Hannah asked him.
Ippy thought about it for several long minutes, picturing Hannah getting ready for a date and doing her hair and then she and Caelum going out to dinner without him. Bring me leftovers?
She giggled. “Of course. Whatever you’d want.”
I’d get to watch my own movies. Right now he had to share the player with his parents and so getting to watch his own movies was often a complicated thing. If Hannah and Caelum went out to dinner without him, then he could watch all the movies he wanted while they were gone. And I could eat ice cream and not have to share it. You like to take my cookies off.
Hannah kissed his cheek. “I’ll fess up to that. What if you and Caelum went on a date without me? Would you like that for you?”
Ippy shrugged—he’d never been on a date, so he had no idea what he would or wouldn’t like while on one. What’s a date like?
Hannah’s lips pressed together and she took her time answering him. “Well, when Caelum and I date in my dreams, we go for a walk along the beach, we hold hands, and we kiss. We don’t need to eat or drink in the dreams, of course, but I imagine there’s lots of eating on dates. Whenever my dads go out for their date nights they go to dinner or dancing or something. Some guy at the mall once asked me if I wanted to go out to a movie with him sometime, so I’m guessing there’s those, too.”
Ippy didn’t know that story and was surprised she’d never told him. Did you date the guy at the mall?
She laughed and shook her head. “Not a chance. Daddy Liam came over and nearly growled at him before dragging me away. This was years ago. I think the guy was afraid Daddy Liam was some crazy escaped nut. He didn’t let me out of his sight for the rest of the time we were there. He kept muttering about boys and their hormones, and how nowhere was free of them and how I’d never be safe in the world until he ruled it or something like that.”
He smiled at her. That sounded like her dad, all right. He put being a protective parent into a whole new light. Sometimes Ippy wished his dad was more like hers.
“Do you like Caelum, too?” she asked him after a quiet minute.
Ippy nodded. I think so. I like touching him and I like when we’re together.
Hannah smiled at him. “That’s really good. I’m glad you do. Do you like me, too?”
Like I do with Caelum? Ippy asked her softly. She nodded and he shrugged. You’re my best friend. And I love you. To me that’s the same. He got a crazy idea in his head and decided against his instincts to push it away. Instead he wanted to run with it. Can I kiss you?
Instead of being surprised, Hannah got onto her knees next to him and grinned. “Sure.” She closed her eyes and opened her mouth a little bit. Then she just sat there and he was left staring at her until she opened her eyes again. “You didn’t kiss me.”
You looked funny.
She seemed like she might have been surprised at first before laughing and shaking her head. “I’ll try not to look funny if you want to try it again.”
He nodded and leaned forward. She came toward him too and then they kissed. It was soft, gentle, hardly anything, but Ippy was left blushing as he pulled away and leaned back against the pillow. I liked that.
Hannah smiled at him. “I did, too. Would you be okay if I was kissing Caelum and you walked in, though? I found this book and it said that jealousy is a big issue in a relationship like this. Caelum says he’s not at all jealous and I don’t want you to get hurt.”
Don’t want you hurt either, Ippy said.
“Thanks. I want you both. Want to have something with both of you. Is that selfish of me, do you think?” she asked him.
Ippy instantly shook his head, very certain of that. Because it was what he was starting to want, too. I wouldn’t mind you kissing Caelum, I don’t think.
“I wouldn’t mind you kissing him either, if you wanted to,” Hannah said as she wrapped her arms around him and gave him a tight hug. The clock downstairs chimed and she let him go. They both knew that his parents would be home again soon. “We’ll be talking about why you said you didn’t want to be friends anymore. But I’m going now. Your parents called Daddy Liam and said I was a bad influence on you. He said I should be good around them for a while.”
Ippy nodded, figuring that much out at least. That wasn’t the only reason they weren’t allowed to be friends anymore, but it was a start. He got off the bed and watched her climb down the drain pipe, making sure that she was safe, before he watched her run through the back yard, jump over the fence with the help of a bench his mom had back there to sit and read on. She was in the trails behind his house before his parents ever got home.
That night, after yet another in a long line of uncomfortable dinners with his parents, Ippy lay on his bed with his phone in his hands. He’d found a forum too and was looking through it and finding out everything that he could. But a lot of being in a relationship with two people sounded too complicated for the little threads of conversation that were listed. One relationship was going to be hard work, he imagined. Though he’d really never been in one. The closest thing he had was with Hannah, and she was his best friend first. He didn’t know what he was supposed to do with that kind of information and a lot of it didn’t really apply to him anyway. He figured out that what he and Hannah and Caelum were going to do, if they did it, was called polyamory. A lot of what the forum seemed to be about was polygamy and he didn’t like that. Maybe for someone else, but not for him. So he closed the forum and opened his contacts to someone he thought might be able to help him.
I have a question about polyamory, he texted to Nicholai. The man wasn’t that close to him, but he’d been Ippy’s teacher for a good year while he caught up to the rest of the class when he was thirteen. This wasn’t all that different, at least for Ippy.
That’s a bit personal, kid.
Ippy wasn’t sure why talking about his own relationship to Nicholai would be personal. Maybe he’d said it wrong. How do I know if I can kiss Caelum and not have Hannah be jealous? There. Maybe that would work better.
WTF are you talking about? Are you high?
Ippy frowned down at his phone. Then he got another text message, this time from Evangeline. Hon, Nico told me you were texting about poly. What’s going on?
I want Hannah and Caelum and they want me, he texted them both back at once.
Evangeline was the first person to text him back. Phillip, hon, poly relationships take a lot of work. A ton. You’re too young. Try having one relationship first.
Nicholai texted a few minutes after her. Talk to Evangeline. All right, so he was completely unhelpful. But Ippy had been having a relationship with Hannah for a while now. Right?
He texted Hannah. Evangeline says I’m too young and I need to have one relationship first.
Her text came nearly instantly. I’m rolling my eyes. I love Aunt Eva but you and me, we’re not too young to
know what we want.
He smiled down at his phone, glad he’d texted her, too. He texted Evangeline back. Not too young. How do you make one not jealous?
Because none of us are jealous to begin with, Evangeline told him a few minutes later. At least she hadn’t argued about him being too young this time. You actually serious about this? she texted before he could reply back to her.
He nodded, then quickly realized that she couldn’t see that so he texted back, Yes.
None of them said anything to him after that and Ippy was glad to find himself in his dreams a few hours later.
Ippy was ready for Caelum this time when he came up to him as he stood on the grassy edge of the beach.
“I talked to Hannah,” he said as soon as Caelum was close enough.
Caelum smiled. “Good. I told you she was worried about you.”
Ippy nodded. He should have known she would be. “I kissed her. Let me kiss you, too.”
Caelum instantly looked surprised, but he opened his arms and Ippy walked into them. Caelum was taller than Hannah and so Ippy had to let Caelum give him a quick kiss, but he felt the same warm rush that he had from kissing Hannah. He stepped back, ready to go, but Caelum wouldn’t let him go so soon. Instead he brought his mouth down to Ippy’s for another kiss and Ippy brought his arms to Caelum’s shoulders, like he saw in the movies, as Caelum kissed him again. This time Caelum put his tongue in Ippy’s mouth and Ippy tried not to bite it. When this kiss ended Caelum did let him go, but Ippy took his hand instead of moving away from him.
“Good?” Caelum asked him.
Ippy smiled. “I like you both.”
Caelum chuckled. “That’s great. Because I like you both, too.”
Ippy was really glad about that. “Someone in my pack thinks I’m too young for this. But I don’t see how. Everyone else is dating. Why not me?”
Caelum shrugged and squeezed his hand.
They were kissing again before Ippy had even figured out that Caelum was coming toward him. Hannah’s mouth had been soft and gentle, not much like her personality, but he liked that some parts of her weren’t the fierce daughter of the third in the pack like she always was. Caelum, though, had dry lips and calloused hands. When they broke apart Ippy spent the next half hour sitting on the grass next to Caelum and looking at his left hand in Caelum’s. He couldn’t see his seal, not like Hannah could, but he could tell that something was different about him. In Ippy’s world full of werewolves, Caelum was different. He smelled like the salty sea, but Ippy didn’t know how much of that was what he thought Caelum would smell like in the dream or if Caelum could actually bring that into the dream with him.
“Where are we?” he asked Caelum, looking away from the boy’s hands, but not really letting go of his hand either. He didn’t want to do that at all, as if hanging onto Caelum tethered him to the dream. He wasn’t ready to say goodbye anytime soon and could easily see why Hannah wanted to spend hours in the dream with him if it was always like this.
Caelum looked out at the sea and lifted his left arm, the one Ippy wasn’t currently hanging onto, to point toward the east. “We’re in Galway Sound right now. Out there is the ocean. I wish you could feel the sea with me, that we could go swimming.”
Ippy nodded and Caelum dropped his arm. “I think I’d like that, too.”
Caelum smiled at him. “What do you think of when you think about us?”
Ippy was surprised by the question and shrugged, not really knowing how to answer him.
“Well, then what about Hannah and us?” Caelum pressed him for an answer.
That was easier for Ippy to answer at least. “She’s my best friend and ever since we found you she’s always been talking about the three of us. Like we could go off on an adventure together.”
Caelum bumped shoulders with him. “I think I’ve had enough adventures for a little while.”
Ippy could sort of understand that. After all, Caelum had been kidnapped and held captive for a lot of years before Hannah had gotten it into her head to go rescue him. Ippy was still glad his best friend had decided to take him along on that trip, even though they’d both gotten into a lot of trouble when they’d been found. It was scary though, much more so than he ever wanted to experience again.
“Being with Hannah is easy. It makes me happy. When I’m with her all the noise goes away. I’m almost…” Ippy struggled to find a word that would tell Caelum what he meant. But nothing was coming up, so he just picked one. “Normal. I guess.”
“What’d I tell you about normal?” Caelum asked him.
Ippy nodded and his smile, when it came, was tight. “No normal.” He got an idea into his head and once in there it was stubbornly refusing to leave. He looked over at Caelum, wondering if it would be okay. “Sit down and hold still.”
Caelum smirked. “I’m not that good at obeying orders. We don’t have a pack like you do.”
“Please?” Ippy asked him, instantly feeling badly and like he’d crossed a line that hadn’t even been discussed. He needed those lines to be said. Like Hannah had. And she paid attention to his lines. Everyone had lines. They made things right. Sara hadn’t listened to his lines, she’d—
Ippy didn’t realize that Caelum was on the ground until Caelum pulled on the leg of his pants, getting his attention. “Hey,” Caelum said when he looked down at him.
With deliberately slow movements, Ippy crouched down next to Caelum before getting on his knees and the moving onto Caelum’s lap. Caelum stretched his legs out under him and Ippy lowered himself onto Caelum’s thighs until he was sitting just above Caelum’s knees. He’d seen it in a movie once, though what he was supposed to do now he wasn’t too sure. He was about to get off when Caelum wrapped his arms around his waist, loosely holding him still.
Ippy looked up at him, at his chapped lips and his wild, sun-washed and wind-sprayed hair. He wanted to kiss Caelum again and leaned forward. Luckily for him, Caelum seemed to figure out what he wanted, too, as he moved closer and put one of his hands on the side of Ippy’s neck. Like before, Caelum’s mouth was soft and warm. But this time he opened for Ippy instantly as he tried using his tongue the way Caelum had with him. He brushed his tongue over Caelum’s teeth and across the roof of his mouth, tasting him. He imagined that Caelum tasted like the ocean, but in the dream he couldn’t tell. He definitely wouldn’t taste like Hannah had, anyway. She’d been too much like bubble gum—all fruit and sugar.
Ippy felt himself shaken out of his dream and looked up into his father’s face, wondering what was going on. He frowned and went to get his phone to ask what was wrong. But his father was already looking through it. “Who is this Caelum?” he asked, scowling at Ippy. “All your texts to that girl are about him.”
Ippy felt heat instantly rush up into his cheeks. His father tossed the phone onto the bed in front of him and Ippy scrambled for it, opening it up to the notes section and starting to type. Though what he could say to explain everything to his dad, Ippy had no idea. Especially when he didn’t actually know what he felt himself. Finally he typed that Caelum was his friend before turning and showing the message to his dad.
His dad didn’t look convinced as he shook his head and crossed his arms over his chest. “Your friend, huh? I think it’s more. You were whining in your sleep. I think that girl has manipulated you into thinking her sick life is okay. She’s corrupted you. Don’t worry, Phillip, we’ll get this sorted out. You won’t be like them.”
Ippy sat up and quickly typed on his phone, asking his dad who he was talking about.
“Liam and that…person…he’s brought into the pack,” his dad replied, sounding like he was disgusted by everything Travis was.
Ippy shook his head and typed that he liked Travis before his dad could turn away from him.
“What’s going on here?” his mother asked as she came into his room, too.
His dad shook his head. “Phillip here needs help. He’s sick. That
girl and her dads have gotten to him, just like they did to Samson. And now Evangeline is infected too. I want us out of this pack. Get your things together, we’re leaving. Samson can’t deny us a trip to another pack, one with far more morals.”
Ippy was typing even as his father spoke, his fingers angrily pounding on the keyboard of his phone. With shaking hands he held up the phone for his parents to see.
Before he said anything, his dad had his hand wrapped around Ippy’s arm, his fingertips digging painfully into Ippy’s skin. “You are coming with us. That’s not optional. You are our son and have to listen to us until you turn eighteen. Get his things packed while I call Samson and tell him that we’re leaving. Tonight.”
Ippy shook as he tried to pry his father’s fingers from his arm. He knew that he was screaming since he couldn’t hear his mom talking to him even though her mouth was moving, but he didn’t care. He didn’t want to leave the pack. He liked it there. This was his home. And Hannah was his best friend and he wasn’t leaving. His dad dragged him downstairs and sat him down at the dining room table. He was still screaming and his dad’s face was read as his mouth moved and there was so much noise and pain and Ippy pulled his legs up to his chest and covered his hands over his ears. His dad pulled his hands away from his ears but he fought back, kicking out at him as he tried to make the noises stop so that he could just think for a moment. Surely there would be a way to get his parents to stop, to reconsider, to let him stay where he belonged. With his pack, and his family, and Hannah.
The side of his head hurt the instant his dad hit him. But it didn’t stop his screaming, it only made it worse because now there was pain in his head and in his ear and the words were too loud. His dad went for him again but Ippy bolted out of the chair, getting away from him and his hands that made the sounds.
Ippy ran to the door and once he had that open he kept running, his bare feet drumming against the sidewalk as he ran as fast and as far as he could go. He felt the ground shaking behind him and went even faster, even as his feet burned from the pebbles and bits of glass that cut him. He found a field and turned into it. The noises were gone now and he thought that maybe this was okay. His head didn’t hurt so much either, but it was still warm. Only the warmth was going down past his ear and onto his chin. He didn’t stop to think about it, instead just kept running.
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