In the pantry, I found fresh apples and potatoes and a Mason jar of yellow beans. I had brought a chicken from home that Daddy had freshly butchered for me, and I put the seasoned bird in the roasting pan that Elijah’s mam had given me. Then I lit a fire and began to peel the apples and potatoes. After I was through, I prepared a pastry crust for an apple pie. Once the pie was in the top portion of the oven, I set the potatoes on the front of the stove so they could cook slowly.
It began to get warm in the large kitchen, so I went out and sat on the porch swing with my shawl wrapped around me, to wait for Elijah to arrive. The time was only five-thirty, so I relaxed a bit, thinking over the day’s events and the happiness it had brought. It was exciting that the first grandchild should have the same birthday as Elijah and me. I decided it would make it easy for everyone to remember.
When I heard the clip clop of the horse’s hooves, I looked up and spotted Elijah at the top of the hill. He traveled at a steady pace to reach the small valley in which our house rested. As he moved in closer, I could see that he was dressed in a crisp, blue button-up shirt and brown, tweed trousers. I knew his mam had been busy sewing them for him, and I was happy to see him wearing them. As he steered the horse toward the yard, I jumped off the porch to greet him. I’d been looking forward to our first meal together in our own home. I knew it would be different once we were married, but for now this would be a special night.
****
After dinner, Elijah patted his stomach and smiled at me as if to say, “Job well done”. Then he stoked the fire while I washed the dishes and tidied up my kitchen. I felt so fortunate to have my own home, and this house was indeed wonderful in every way. I was grateful that we had modern plumbing, and electricity generated from a large windmill that fed directly into the laundry room, which served for the washer and dryer, the water heater and the iron. The rest of the house had no electricity. We had the use of lanterns for light, and fireplaces—two upstairs and two downstairs—to heat the house. All the windows faced the North and the South, with no direct sunlight to overheat the house in summer. This way, there was always light in all the rooms, allowing the temperature to remain stable throughout every room. The house faced due south, which I thought was a great way to design it. My husband-to-be had taken a lot of time in planning to come up with the perfect design to the well-built home. As I looked outside the kitchen window, I felt grateful for the warmth against the wind and the early snowfall.
“Jane, will you come sit by the fire with me and stop fussing in that kitchen?” Elijah teased.
“I’ll be right there,” I called from the other room.
I put down the dishtowel.
He’s right. I’m fussing too much, and wasting the precious, little bit of time we have together.
When I entered the room, there was a fairly large box on the floor beside Elijah. My heart skipped a beat as I caught sight of it. I sat down as he pushed the box toward me, urging me to open it. I lifted the flap excitedly, finding newspaper inside. I looked to Elijah in confusion, so he lifted the layers of paper to reveal flowers. Several bundles of dried flowers tied with twine laid waiting for me inside. There were black-eyed-Susans, daisies, multi-colored cosmos, blue cornflowers, and several others I couldn’t name.
“Oh, Elijah, these are beautiful. They look like the flowers that grow wild along the meadow.”
“They are. I picked them in early September. They’ve been drying upside down in Papa’s barn ever since,” he said proudly.
“This is such a beautiful thing you’ve done for me. After the shawl you made for my last birthday, I wasn’t sure what you’d come up with this time. I believe you outdid yourself, and I love you for it.”
“Would you like me to hang them for you?” Elijah asked.
“Yeah, I would. And I know the perfect spot. I’d like them to hang in the window above the kitchen sink. That way, I can admire them even in winter. The bright colors will brighten up my day, when all there is to look at is snow,” I said excitedly.
“Jah. That would be the perfect place.”
Elijah rose from his spot on the floor to hang the flowers. He found some small nails in the barn, and began the task. I had not yet made a covering for the kitchen window, and the flowers served as a sort of rainbow curtain. There were yellows, blues, reds and cameos—arranged in just the right order to show off God’s rainbow for my pleasure.
“They’ll look even more beautiful with the light coming in through the window in the morning,” I said.
“I’ll bet the sunrise will make the colors look even bolder,” Elijah offered.
Only a few mornings away, and I will find out. Hopefully I’ll be too busy cuddling Elijah to notice.
The next few days would be filled with last minute preparations for the wedding. We decided to have the dinner and the barn dance at our new home. Since I had gotten good at square dancing due to all the recent weddings, I found I enjoyed it enough to have it for our own wedding. It would also give me another chance to hear Elijah play the banjo. He had protested when I asked him to play at our wedding, but I hadn’t heard him play since my brother’s wedding. We had done so much dancing at Nadine’s and Hannah’s weddings that he never got the chance to take a turn at it. After a great deal of prodding on my part, Elijah finally agreed to play only one song on the instrument after we had a chance to have our special, first dance together.
“We shouldn’t stay long,” Elijah said, interrupting my wandering thoughts. “We have a lot to do in the next few days.”
I knew he was right, but it didn’t make things any easier. We sat by the fire a few more minutes and kissed, while discussing plans for our future. Eventually, the fire began to die down, and it was time to go back to my small space at my parent’s house. It was tough to leave, knowing this was my home, and I momentarily wondered if Elijah should have waited until this day to present me with it. Though it might have made the waiting easier, I realized I would not have wanted to miss the time we had spent together at the house, preparing to make it our home.
Elijah took a ladle of water from the galvanized pail beside the fireplace and doused the remaining coals. He was tired and in need of sleep—he would have chores in only a few short hours, and the trip home would be too cold to bear if we waited any longer.
TEN
A TIME TO LOVE
October was already earning its reputation for being one of the coldest fall months—one of the reasons we decided not to wait until November to wed. As silly as my mother had thought it to be, I didn’t want to have to wear a jacket with my wedding dress. I felt the dress itself was plenty heavy enough for fall, but not quite enough for a cold winter month.
****
The following two days were spent in preparation for the wedding, allowing very little time for Elijah and me to spend time with one another. It was good that we kept busy, or I may have been too tempted to spend the time with him and slack off my duties. There was so much work to be done; it was easy to become overwhelmed by it all. I didn’t care as much about the wedding as I was concerned about being a wife. I already felt like his wife in every way except one, and that would change at the end of my wedding day.
****
The day of my wedding finally arrived and I was up at five in the morning. I was obviously more nervous than I ever thought I could be. It didn’t really make sense to me that I should be nervous. After all, I was to wed the man for whom I’d been waiting for a long time. Maybe it was the thought of the wedding night that I couldn’t seem to shake from my nerves. Deborah and Miriam would be over soon, but I only wanted Nadine’s company. I needed to talk to my sister, much in the same way we had before she married Benjamin.
Without warning, a knock came at the door. It was Nadine, and she opened the door before I could invite her in.
“Boy, am I glad to see you!”
“I saw from my house that your lamp was lit, so I thought I’d come over and see why you couldn’t sleep,” my s
ister whispered.
“Well, how come you're up this early?” I asked.
“I suppose I had the jitters for you, and decided to get up and pray.”
“I sure could use a sister talk right now. I must confess; I’m a bit worried about—well—tonight.”
She looked a little lost at my statement so I began to clarify my meaning, making sure I was cautious about my wording.
“Don’t worry little sister; it’ll be a new experience for both of you. God will make it right for you since you both honored his commands,” she tried to reassure me.
“But I feel nervous and shy about him seeing me without my dress. How on earth did you manage to get through it?” I asked nervously.
“You’ll be married. That’s the way God intended for married people to be on their wedding night. Adam and Eve were naked in the garden. She was his wife, and God didn’t let her have clothing. Adam was her husband,” she explained.
“Can you pray with me about it?” I asked.
“Of course I will,” she comforted me.
We sat on my bed and held hands as she began a sweet and sincere prayer on my behalf.
“Lord God, we come before your throne to thank you for this very special day. Be with Jane on her wedding night, and bless her with courage and self-esteem so she’ll be able to reap the reward of staying pure according to your word. Bless Elijah with gentleness and patience if needed, for this very special time for them as a married couple. In Jesus name, Amen.”
“Amen,” I whispered.
We sat on the bed for a minute, tears running down our cheeks. I hugged my sister and told her how much she meant to me. I knew I would be fine—God would be with me to comfort my fears about my wedding night with Elijah.
****
The strong smell of coffee let us know that we were no longer the only family members awake. It was confirmed when Miriam entered my room with a smile of anticipation.
“Are you ready for your big day?” Miriam asked.
“I am now,” I said as I gave Nadine one last squeeze.
I wiped away the last of my tears, determined to cry only happy tears for the rest of my life.
Nadine excused herself so she could go home to prepare her husband’s breakfast. Deborah then showed up with the bouquets she had assembled from some of the fancier, late-blooming wildflowers from her family’s flower patch. They were beautiful and full of color—just the way I had requested. Across the room, my full wedding gown hung form a peg on the wall. It was simple, but trimmed with lace, with a full flowing train that Molly, as the flower girl, would carry down the aisle of the church. Our ceremony would be more of a traditional one, with very little Amish customs. I had requested it that way, and Elijah had allowed me the indulgence of such.
After a hot bath and a cup of coffee, I was ready for Miriam and Deborah to help me get the long wedding gown and the things needed to fix my hair into the waiting buggy.
By the time we reached the Mennonite Church, it was filled with family and friends in the community. I went into a side room where my mother and my attendants assisted me with my dress and hair. My veil consisted of a flowered ring that went around my hair, with a trail of lacy material hanging down from the back.
My hands grew shaky as the time drew near for the ceremony. I couldn’t quite figure out why I felt such nervousness, but I knew it didn’t have anything to do with my feelings toward Elijah. I believe the prospect of going through such a private thing in front of so many people made my stomach churn a bit. I felt fortunate that I had not eaten any breakfast, fearing that it might come back up. At the same time, I was hungry and in need of something. My mother handed me a cup of tea, as though she knew what I was thinking. The tea was just what I needed to settle my stomach, making me less fidgety.
My father entered the already overcrowded room to inform me that everyone was ready. It was a good thing for me because if I had had to wait much longer, I may have become more agitated. Miriam and Deborah left to take their positions in the hall to walk the aisle before me.
When we were alone, my father turned to me and spoke; his eyes full of fresh tears that threatened to spill over.
“I love you Jane. I may not have always been there for you when you were dealing with the things your mother did, and I’m plenty sorry for it. But I’m here for you now, and I always will be if you need me,” he said, still teary-eyed.
“Did Nadine get this talk too, Daddy?” I asked jokingly.
He smiled, making the air seem a little lighter between us.
“Am I going a little overboard?” he asked.
Nah. I’m glad you're my daddy. I love you, and I’d never change that, not for anything in the world,” I said, trying to hold back the tears.
If the truth be told, it hadn’t been easy being his daughter. Or having such a painful past. Or being a member of my family. Although I knew that it was not something I could share with him yet, he seemingly was offering me the chance to expose the sorrow from the abuse that I had suffered only a few short years ago.
Fortunately, the hardest part of my life was finally over—the growing up part. And I’d forgiven him for not being there to save me from the abuse my mamma had put me through. It was now time to put my childhood behind me and go forward. It no longer mattered that he was never around to spare me the hurt that my mother had put on me—he turned out to be a good father, and that changed everything—just as Mamma’s salvation had.
Suddenly, for the first time in my life, I no longer felt afraid of what the future would hold for me. I knew what God’s immediate plan for my life was, and I felt I had a lot to look forward to. After a short silence, my father spoke softly, letting me know that the moment of truth had arrived.
“Well let’s go honey,” he urged. “Elijah’s been waiting a long time for you. We mustn’t let him wait another minute.”
“Just one more thing, Daddy. I want to tell you one more thing.”
“What’s that, Jane?”
“Thanks for moving us here, Daddy.”
I put on a smile and took a deep breath as we exited the little room to take our place at the back of the church.
I looked out at the crowd that had gathered to witness our special day.
Well, this is it. I’m a grown woman now, and I’m about to be a wife.
The large, pipe organ sounded the signal for the ceremony to begin. First, Deborah and Matthew walked down the aisle, followed by Miriam and Jonathon. I took another deep breath as the organist cued my descent toward the front of the church and my eager husband-to-be. Elijah’s eyes caught mine as I left the foyer and made my way down the aisle. The look in his eyes was one of pure love—for me. I felt like the luckiest woman in the world as I took my place beside Elijah at the altar.
In my nervous state, I struggled to concentrate on the words being said by the preacher.
“In the consummation of the first marriage between Adam and Eve: the woman, whom God has made as a helper for man, was not taken from his head to rule over him, nor from his feet as to be trampled by him—but from his side that she might be his equal. From under his arm, that she might receive his protection. And from near his heart, that she might own and command his love,” the words flowed freely from his tongue to our ears.
The ceremony went quicker than I’d imagined it to. Still, it was lovely. When given our cue, Elijah and I kissed a lengthy kiss that didn’t go unnoticed by the crowd of family and friends in attendance. Suddenly lost in that kiss, I felt the gentle nudge from the preacher to cease. When we finally separated from one another, there was a gentle hush of laughter from the spectators. My face turned several shades of red—so much that I didn’t dare face the multitude that watched. Elijah and I locked eyes for a brief moment before the preacher announced our status as a wedded couple. I thought I detected a glimmer of tears in his eyes.
“May I present Mr. and Mrs. Elijah Zook,” he announced.
Keeping my face toward the ground, I s
wallowed hard the lump in my throat, trying not to alert anyone to my still-nervous state. Once we exited the church, we were free to leave. Elijah assisted me into the buggy, then climbed aboard and clicked to Eli, prompting him to begin a slow trot.
“Why are we going the opposite way?” I asked Elijah. “They’ll be expecting us at the house for dinner.”
“I thought we’d take a little detour before we greet our friends and family at the house. Is that all right with you, my beautiful wife?”
His words caught me by surprise, but I enjoyed the sound of it.
“Say it again,” I urged him.
“I love you, Mrs. Zook,” he said boastfully.
I grinned widely at his declaration of love for me, for he had finally become my husband. After all the waiting, I suddenly felt a peaceful warmth come over me, strong enough to take away the chill in the air. I snuggled in closer to Elijah, enough to get under his waiting arm. I knew without a doubt that it was there that I was meant to be.
Little Wild Flower, Amish Romance/Amish Fiction/Christian Romance Page 14
