Normal Enough

by Marie Sexton

  He remembered Richie’s most recent message. I just want you to know you don’t have to be alone, Kasey. Because I know Mom wouldn’t have wanted that for you.

  The past was over. There was no going back. No healing those wounds. Yes, he still hoped Brandon would want to keep seeing him. But if not, it didn’t mean Kasey had to be alone. He’d still have Tony. And if not Tony, maybe Reggie, or one of the other mechanics at the garage. Or maybe one of his neighbors.

  Or maybe….

  Maybe even his brother.

  The only way he’d be alone again was if he chose it. It was that simple. The realization was so profound, it took his breath away.

  No matter whether Brandon stayed or left, Kasey’s days of being lonely were over.

  He climbed out of bed and donned a pair of sweats before making his way to the kitchen. It was easy to find Richie’s number by scrolling through his caller ID. He hit Dial. His knees began to shake so hard he had to sit. He waited, heart pounding, as the phone began to ring.

  “Hello?” The voice was female and thick with sleep. Kasey glanced at the clock. It was nearly midnight. He hadn’t realized how late it was, but it would be rude to hang up now.

  “Can I talk to Richie, please?”

  She mumbled something that may have been, “Hold on,” or may have been, “Goddamn.” And then his brother said, “Hello?”

  Kasey swallowed hard against his dry throat. “Richie? It’s me. It’s Kasey.”

  A second of silence, then his brother said, with obvious alarm, “Kasey? Is everything all right?”

  A logical question, considering Kasey had never called him before, and certainly never at midnight. “I’m sorry I woke you up. I didn’t think about the time.”

  “It’s okay. You caught me by surprise, but it’s good to hear from you. Hang on. Let me go in the kitchen.” He heard muffled words as Richie said something to his wife, then unidentified noises as he left his bedroom. “Okay,” he said, louder now. “Are you sure everything’s okay? How’ve you been?”

  “I’m good,” Kasey said. “I’m sorry I didn’t come to Rod’s funeral. It was hard for me to get the time off.”

  “I understand.”

  Of course, that hadn’t been the only reason, but it gave him a good excuse.

  “You got my message?” Richie went on. “About Roger?”

  “Yeah.”

  “Another DUI. It’s his third strike. Driving a stolen car too. I know there’s no love lost between you, but….” He sighed. “I feel like you’re the only brother I have left. I worry about you.”

  “You don’t need to.”

  “Well, it’s my job. I’m more than ten years too late, but let me try to play big brother now, okay?” He laughed self-consciously. “Are you still working at the same place?”

  “Yes.”

  “I watch Wrench Wars every week, hoping I’ll see you, but I never do.”

  Now it was Kasey’s turn to laugh. “I do my best to stay out of their way.”

  “Those guys look like assholes. It’s probably just as well.”

  “What about you?”

  “We’re good. Troy just started kindergarten, and Julie’s in second grade. They both love school.” He laughed. “They must have their mother’s brains, that’s all I can say. Thank goodness for that.”

  Kasey nodded. Until now, he hadn’t even known the names of his niece and nephew. The omission suddenly seemed shameful. “I’d like to see them,” Kasey said, and he was surprised to realize he meant it. “I mean, just pictures. Maybe you could e-mail some.”

  “Absolutely! You won’t believe how much they’ve grown.”

  His enthusiasm for his kids was endearing. Kasey found himself smiling.

  “You seeing anyone?” Richie asked. “A girlfriend? Or… a boyfriend, I guess?”

  Kasey hesitated. There wasn’t exactly judgment in his brother’s voice. Only a hint of uneasiness. “I guess I’m kind of seeing someone.”

  “Kind of?” Richie laughed again, sounding easier now. “You mean you’re not sure?”

  “It’s new, that’s all.”

  “Nothing wrong with that. Who is he?”

  “He’s a lawyer. His name’s Brandon.”

  “A lawyer? Damn, kid, way to go.”

  “I guess.” Bandit nudged his head under Kasey’s hand, confused by this new activity of sitting up in the kitchen in the middle of the night. Kasey scratched the dog’s ears absently, pondering his next question. He knew what he wanted to ask. He just wasn’t sure how to put it into words. “Do you think she’d approve?”

  “Who?”

  “Mom.”

  Richie sighed. “Are you asking me if she’d approve of you being gay?”

  “No.” Because Kasey had to believe she would. The thought she might have turned on him too was more than he could bear. “I just mean….” He floundered. “I guess I don’t know what I mean.”

  Richie was silent. Kasey could almost hear him thinking. He patted Bandit’s head, waiting.

  “She’d have wanted you to be happy,” Richie said at last. “I know that much.”

  Kasey swallowed around the lump in his throat. Yes, that was what he’d needed to hear. It was funny, and somehow perfect, that Richie had managed to say the right thing. How much different might his life have been if Richie had reached out to him when he was ten years old, instead of now, when he was twenty-four? But Richie had only been seventeen when their mother died. Older than Kasey, yes, but hardly an adult. He’d been hurting too. And there was no point in holding a grudge.

  “I’m sorry,” Kasey said at last. “For not taking your calls.”

  “Don’t be. You had every right. I wish things had been different.”

  “I’ve been so angry—”

  “I know.”

  “I don’t think I’m so angry anymore.”

  “Good.” Richie’s voice was low and hoarse with emotion, and he stopped short to take a deep breath. “I’m glad.”

  Kasey was glad too. Not because he believed he and Richie would magically become best friends, but because for the first time ever, he felt like his past was really behind him. Like he was at a beginning, and all he had to do was wait and be ready to take the blessings as they came.

  He was looking forward to it.

  “It’s late,” he said. “I should let you get back to bed.”

  “Yeah. I do have to be up early. But I’m glad you called.”

  “Me too.”

  “Good night, kid.”

  Kasey was about to hit the End button when he heard his brother call out.

  “Kasey, wait! Are you there?”

  “I’m here.”

  “I know things have been rough, but maybe next time I call, you’ll answer? That’s all I ask.”

  Kasey nodded, although sitting alone in his dark trailer, only Bandit was there to see it.

  “I will.”

  Chapter 4

  KASEY’S SHIFT the next day seemed to drag on for ages. It didn’t help that Tony ribbed him nonstop about the big, cheesy grin on his face.

  “I guess I don’t have to ask if it was good,” the man said, then laughed when Kasey blushed. Of course, Brandon was only partially responsible for his smile. Partly it was his newfound peace with Richie. Partly it was Tony himself.

  It was nice to have a friend.

  When the day finally ended, Kasey went home to feed Bandit and wash up before leaving for his date with Brandon. He was terrified, but at the same time, more excited than he’d ever been at the prospect of what was to come. He was glad to be driving his own vehicle again, though. At least he didn’t have the distraction of the Cougar to unsettle him even more.

  Brandon’s house was a few miles out of town, hidden from the road by a bank of trees. It was smaller than Kasey expected, built on a hill. There were windows sunk into the garden-level, though, and Kasey guessed the garage was built under the main floor, accessible by the drive that wrapped around to the
back. Kasey parked in front. By the time he rang the doorbell, his knees were shaking.

  Brandon greeted him with a smile both sexy and flirtatious. “I was beginning to think this moment would never come.”

  Kasey balked, suddenly self-conscious. He was here to be fucked. They both knew that. He felt silly for it, and there seemed to be too much empty space between him and Brandon. Miles of carpet to cross to touch the man he wanted so much. A mountain of clothes to shed gracelessly before he got what he came for.

  Brandon took his hand and pulled him close, his eyes full of laughter. Once again, Kasey felt as if the man could read every one of his embarrassing thoughts.

  “We’ll get there,” he whispered against Kasey’s lips, kissing him sweetly. “But let’s have dinner first.”

  Kasey nodded, but in truth, his stomach was so fluttery he wasn’t sure he could eat. Still, he let Brandon lead him into the dining room and serve him lasagna and salad, along with a glass of wine that made his head spin and left his mouth dry. Through it all, he fidgeted, until finally, Brandon took his hand and pulled him out of his chair.

  “Come and see my cars.”

  He led Kasey down a flight of stairs and opened the door. He reached inside and flipped a switch, and a bank of overhead lights came to life, illuminating the space within.

  The garage ran the length of the house and was cleaner than any garage had a right to be, although it still smelled the way a garage should—like oil and brake fluid and rubber. A counter on the back wall held oil, paper towels, and cleaning products. The long, low room contained seven cars total, although one was a late-model Jeep that was obviously for use during inclement weather.

  “One of these things is not like the others,” Kasey sang, and he was glad when Brandon laughed.

  The real collection consisted of six cars. There were the three Kasey had already seen: the Chevelle, the GTO, and the Cougar. There was also a ’67 Camaro, which appeared to be another of Brandon’s “everyday” vehicles. There was a ’74 Pontiac Firebird Trans Am, probably worth close to seventy-five thousand dollars. But the last car in the bay made Kasey’s mouth drop open.

  “Holy shit. A Mustang Boss?”

  “Isn’t she gorgeous?”

  “Amazing. What year? I’m guessing ’69?”

  “You got it.”

  “They’re so rare.” Back when NASCAR focused more on street cars, a manufacturer only had to produce five hundred of any given model to qualify for the Production Car class, resulting in tons of “limited production” vehicles—regular Ford, Chevy, and Dodge bodies with gigantic engines shoehorned inside. “I’ve never seen one in person.”

  “She’s one of only eight hundred and fifty-nine built.”

  “Wow.” Kasey hardly dared touch her. She was painted deep red. To the untrained eye, she might have looked like any other Mustang, but the hood scoop and the small “Boss 429” decal on her fender told the real story. The Boss’s engine was too big for the original Mustang body. Ford had hired an outside shop to modify the engine bay to make it fit. The official horsepower rating was three-seventy-five, but her true horsepower was well over five hundred.

  “Christ, she must be worth a fortune!”

  “She didn’t come cheap. She’s the crown of my collection, for now at least.”

  “For now?”

  He shrugged sheepishly. “I’m saving my pennies for a ’71 Hemi ’Cuda.”

  Kasey whistled in appreciation. “Good luck finding one.”

  “I know, right? So until then, this one’s my baby.”

  “She’s amazing.”

  “I’ll let you drive her someday.”

  “Are you serious? I’d be afraid to try.”

  “Nah. She’s just a car, same as any other.”

  “Not the same as any other, and you know it.” Kasey bent to peer inside. Her interior was black—the only color they’d come in back in ’69. She was beautiful, but she didn’t stir him the way some of the other cars did. Maybe because she represented the extreme—something clean and pristine and utterly unattainable. The thought of getting off in her seemed nearly sacrilegious.

  He wandered through the garage, checking out the other cars, appreciating them from the simple perspective of a car enthusiast, while still acknowledging the erotic appeal of their shadowy interiors. The Cougar especially called to him. He’d driven her for a week, and he’d thought many times of how good it would feel to be with Brandon in her front seat. He stopped next to her passenger door, pondering. Brandon wrapped his arms around Kasey’s waist from behind and kissed the back of his neck.

  “Pick your favorite, baby.” He nibbled on Kasey’s ear, causing him to shiver. “Tell me which one you want me to fuck you in.”

  Kasey’s pulse began to race, his body already reacting to Brandon’s touch.

  “Any of them?”

  “Any of them.”

  Brandon reached down to grip Kasey’s groin. His cock grew hard against Kasey’s ass. Kasey leaned back against Brandon’s body and let the man caress him. “This one.”

  He could sense Brandon’s surprise. “I thought for sure you’d choose the Mustang.”

  “She’s gorgeous. But she doesn’t turn me on like this one. Plus”—he smiled—“this one has a bench seat instead of buckets.”

  Brandon moved him forward, pushing him face-first against the side of the car. “Reason enough for me.” The movement of his hand on Kasey’s groin grew bolder. He began to grind his pelvis slowly against Kasey’s ass. “God, I want you so many ways I don’t even know where to begin.”

  Kasey moaned, reveling in Brandon’s weight against his back, his hand on his stiffening cock, his breath against the nape of his neck. He was trapped, yet not helpless. He was ready to let himself be captured. He moaned as Brandon squeezed his groin.

  “I’ll do anything you want, baby. Just tell me.”

  He wasn’t sure what he wanted, other than to be in the car, surrendering to his desire, lost in Brandon’s touch. He didn’t know how to put it into words, though. Instead, he arched his hips back, pushing against Brandon’s grinding pelvis. He loved the moan he received in response.

  Brandon unbuttoned Kasey’s jeans. Kasey held his breath, anticipating Brandon’s soft touch on his skin. He held perfectly still as Brandon lifted the band of his briefs and slipped his hand inside. He moaned deep in his throat when Brandon’s soft fingers wrapped around his erection. The simple pleasure took his breath away. Brandon began caressing Kasey’s length with slow, soft strokes.

  Kasey sighed and relaxed against the car, panting quietly as Brandon worked down below. He felt limp and pliant, vulnerable yet sexy. He reached between them to caress the bulge of Brandon’s groin through his pants. Brandon’s breath hissed through his teeth, and suddenly, Kasey wanted to be skin to skin.

  He turned to unbutton Brandon’s shirt, kissing him hungrily as he did. Brandon pushed Kasey’s jeans down his hips. They struggled, laughing between kisses, straining to rid themselves of every thread of clothing, until they were both naked, and Kasey stood, pinned by the length of Brandon’s body to the side of the car. Brandon’s flesh against his front burned with heat. The metal of the car was shockingly cold against his back. But inside the car, it would be warm. The leather of the seats would be perfect.

  “The car,” he gasped as Brandon kissed him. “I want to get in the car.”

  They moved enough for Brandon to open the passenger door. Kasey sank down onto the seat, still facing Brandon, his legs outside the body of the car. He breathed deep, taking in the aura of the Cougar, the smell of her old carpet and upholstery, oil, and antifreeze. His pulse raced. His cock stood hard and erect between his legs. Brandon stepped toward him, his erection beaded with moisture. Kasey reached for him, pulling him close. He buried his nose in Brandon’s hair. He smelled of soap and musk, and the thrum of arousal in Kasey’s groin grew to a roar. He slid his tongue up Brandon’s length and tasted the drop of moisture at his tip. Brandon s
ucked his breath in through his teeth, but he pulled away before Kasey could take him in.

  “I won’t last,” he said. “And I’m not done with you yet.”

  He pushed Kasey backward onto the seat and lay on top of him to kiss him, pushing his tongue past Kasey’s lips. Once again, Kasey felt he was being claimed, and he surrendered to it. He wrapped his arms around Brandon’s neck and gave in to the sweet taste of his kiss. Their erections rubbed together, but when Kasey reached down to touch them, Brandon stopped him, laughing softly in Kasey’s ear. “Honey, if I let you touch me, I’ll come before I get to fuck you.”

  Kasey moaned, partly in frustration that he was being forced to go so slow. But he loved knowing he had such a profound effect on this man who otherwise seemed so in control.

  Brandon moved to Kasey’s neck, nibbling at his flesh, then kissed his chest, stopping to tease each of his nipples into hard, aching buds. Then down Kasey’s stomach. Kasey cried out when Brandon kissed his navel. Such an innocent thing, and yet it sent a new heat coursing through him. He pushed Brandon lower, and the man obliged, although he didn’t move to Kasey’s cock. Instead, he continued to tease him, circling his groin, gripping Kasey’s thighs in his hands. Kasey strained his hips upward. He tried pushing Brandon’s head down, but the man refused to oblige him as he kissed slowly around Kasey’s patch of hair, then down his thigh, then pushed one of Kasey’s knees up so he could nuzzle his scrotum.

  “God, you smell amazing. I could breathe you in all night, except I’d have a hard time fucking you properly from here.”

  Kasey moaned at the thought. He couldn’t have said at that moment what he wanted. Only that he needed more. The car seemed to sing to him, telling him this was good and normal and right. Some ache deep inside of him demanded to be appeased. He looked down, meeting his lover’s eyes. “Please,” he whispered.

  Brandon smiled and leaned in again, between Kasey’s legs. Kasey gasped as Brandon’s tongue touched his perineum. He bucked his hips, unsure if he wanted that wet warmth to move higher or lower, knowing only that he might scream if he didn’t get more soon. Brandon chuckled throatily and sucked one of Kasey’s testicles into his warm mouth, rolling it gently with his tongue.