by Erin Osborne
For the next few hours I work through math, reading, and writing. The only parts that I don’t get a chance to work through are social studies and science. But, I’m not worried about those parts of the test. I was always good in those classes and I think that the information will come back to me as I go. If not, I’ll have to worry about that when I’m ready to take the actual test.
“Mrs. Swimely, I’m done,” I say, standing up to stretch my body as she walks over to me.
“Give me a minute to glance through this and I’ll let you know what we’re working with,” she says.
Sitting back down in the chair, I pull my phone out and try to read on my Kindle app. My leg is bouncing as my nerves begin to ratchet higher the longer she’s looking over my work. I try not to look at her and get lost in the make-believe world that is open on the pages before me.
Finally, I risk glancing up at her and see the smile once again on her face. She turns her attention back toward the packet, and I notice that she’s almost through it. There’s no way that I can keep pretending to read this book so I close out as a message comes through.
Boy Scout: So proud of you. See you soon.
Before I can respond, another message comes through my phone.
Wood: You got this.
Both messages are short and sweet. They mean the world to me though. Today is so important to learning when I’ll be able to go to college and they both know that I was worried as hell about what was gonna happen.
I don’t get a chance to respond as Mrs. Swimely walks back over to me and takes a seat next to me. My body is shaking as she looks at me-drawing the tension out when she takes her time saying a word to me.
“Take a deep breath,” she says. “Relax and lets go over this.”
“Okay,” I say.
“For you being out of school for so long, I thought we’d have a lot to work on. In all honesty, you’re ready to take your test right now. So, I’m going to make an appointment for you at the testing center when the next exam is,” she says, pulling her phone out so that she can look up the date. “It looks like that will be in a few weeks. I’m going to call the advisor and make sure that your name is on the list. You’ll need a form of ID, your pencils, and I’d bring some extra paper with you. For the written portion of the test, you’ll need a blue or black pen.”
“Are you serious right now?” I ask.
“Yes, dear,” she says, a smile appearing as I jump up and wrap my arms around her.
“Thank you so much!” I say.
“You’re welcome, dear,” Mrs. Swimely says.
I rush out of the learning center and pull my phone out. Alex is waiting for me by the SUV, but I need to call Wood and Boy Scout. Excitement is coursing through me in this moment and I need to share it with someone.
“Hey,” Wood says, answering his phone on the first ring. “How’s the test?”
“Wood, I aced the practice test and I take the real one in a few weeks,” I say.
“That’s awesome news,” he says. “We’ll go out to dinner tonight to celebrate.”
“Okay. I want to call Boy Scout and let him know too,” I say.
“Sounds good. I’ll see you soon.”
I hang up my phone and immediately search for Boy Scouts name. As soon as I pull it up, I hit call and wait for him to answer.
“Hey J,” he says.
“Boy Scout, I did it!” I say.
“What do you mean, babe?” he asks.
“I did good enough on the practice test that I don’t need to get extra help. I’m taking the test in a few weeks,” I tell him.
“That’s great news. So proud of you,” he says.
“Thank you,” I respond.
After hanging up with him, I get in the SUV and make my way back to the house. Kim is waiting there for me with a cake to celebrate the good news. For the rest of the afternoon, we talk, laugh, and I feel better than I have in so long. My confidence is slowly growing with each new step I take.
Chapter Ten
Jennifer
IT’S BEEN THREE months and the time seems to be flying by. I went to my appointment for my GED classes and, Mrs. Swimely graded it before I left. She told me that even though I dropped out of school at the age of fifteen, I had a good grasp on the knowledge.
In the meantime, she gave me some papers to study so I could brush up on the things I needed to, and scheduled me to take the test. To say I’m nervous is an understatement, but Wood and Boy Scout helped me out. They looked over the notes she gave me and quizzed me when we were sitting around the house or at the clubhouse.
I’ve been going to the clubhouse a little more. I’m not super comfortable there, and I don’t know if I ever will be. Especially with the house bunnies in the mix. Collette is out for blood when it comes to me and the guys. She thinks she has some sort of claim on them when I know she doesn’t.
Hell, from what they’ve told me, she’s never even stepped foot in their shared room. That’s the only place they fuck. Ginger is the same way. But, I go because I like hanging out with the rest of the girls and it’s nice to see the family atmosphere within the club. There’s arguing, fighting, and drinking. Along with lots of sex based on the noises you hear at any given time. But, the overall atmosphere is that of a huge family.
Wood and Boy Scout have been by my side the entire time since the lockdown. They’re at my apartment every single night, and only leave when they have church or other club business. Most of the time they try to be back by dinner, but that doesn’t always happen.
I’ve been to their house a few times now. They want me to be comfortable enough to want to move in with them. I’m almost there, but I think the things holding me back right now are Collette and Ginger. They’re going to try to do what they can to drive me away from Wood and Boy Scout.
I don’t want this to impact Wade if I get pushed to the point I stop whatever is going on between us. He’s grown so attached to them, and it’s going to affect him no matter what, but for us to have to move in a hurry and all that bullshit will be worse on him.
The first night I went to their house, I was amazed by what I saw. It’s a single-story home with a wraparound porch. The outside has a log cabin feel to it. Inside, the floorplan is open. And a lot bigger than what I thought it would be.
After the entryway, is a living room that has a small bar separating it from the kitchen. In the kitchen, there’s an island, a ton of cupboards, and a breakfast nook. There’s a formal dining room off of that, before a hallway. As we walk down the hallway, there are five doors all standing open except for the one at the very end of the hallway.
They lead me to each door to show me all of the bedrooms. One was already painted in a light blue with a motorcycle theme to it. Guess they already picked Wade’s room out. It’s the last bedroom before the door at the end. Across from his room is a bathroom. Wood opened the door that showcased a large room with the biggest bed I’ve ever seen in my life sitting in the center of it.
There were two dressers and a TV mounted on the wall at the end of the bed. Off to the right side were two closed doors. The first one led to a walk-in closet, while the other one opened to a huge en suite. My favorite part was the soaker tub. It would easily fit the three of us along with the huge shower with a bench seat in it.
There were no changes I could see the house needed. At the opposite side of the house there were two more rooms. One was an office for the guys, and the other one sat empty and would be my space. A space I could turn into an office when I started my classes.
The yard behind the house was absolutely perfect. There was more than enough room for Wade to run and play while we sat at the patio table and watched him. Boy Scout was telling me about a swing set they were looking at for when we officially moved in.
It brought tears to my eyes to see the thought that was put into this house, and the plans they have to ensure Wade and I were comfortable and safe when we’re here. They’re trying to turn it into a safe h
aven for us.
I started school a month ago. It’s different and challenging. The most challenging part of it is understanding the homework, and getting it done around Wade’s schedule. On my third day at school, I walked in to find quite a shock. The professor was an old John, and we definitely recognized one another. He didn’t make a big deal of it, so I followed suit and took a seat before getting ready for class.
Inside, I was trembling he would let something slip about my old life, but I didn’t need to worry about that. He was one of the nicest men that came to see me and basically ignored me for the first few classes. If I raised my hand, he’d call on me, but that’s it. So, we see one another once a week and act like we never met one another before.
Kim thought it was funny when I told her about it a few days after I saw him for the first time. I laughed with her because it could’ve been worse. It could’ve been one of the men that like to beat women and are rough to the point I often carried the bruises left by them around for days.
Some days, I have a ton of homework and don’t get to spend as much time with Wade or anyone else like I want. Other days, I don’t really have anything that can’t be put on hold until Wade takes a nap or goes to bed. Then I feel like I’m ignoring Wood and Boy Scout.
But, the immense pride I feel in myself is starting to help build up my confidence and allow me to realize no one has left my side, they’re helping me in any way they can. Even Slim has offered to help me with some of my accounting work. It was during one of these times he threw an idea at me.
“Jennifer, I know you’ve got a shady past. It wasn’t your fault but has shaped you into the person you are today. My boys are head over heels for you and your son. Put them out of their misery. Cut them loose or let them in,” Slim says as we pour over the worksheets I have for one of my accounting classes. I’m at a traditional school but I’m only going for my Applied Studies degree. That means I don’t have to take all the regular courses.
“I want to let them in. It’s hard because I know if I let them in, there’s a chance they’ll walk away. They have the power to break me right now, and I’m not sure I can risk that when I feel like I’ve made a lot of progress,” I tell him, putting my pencil down on his desk.
“They’re not gonna leave you over your past. It’s just that; in the past. They both have shit they lock away and keep inside. No one knows that shit but them. You let them in, and they’ll let you in. Now, while you’re here, I have an offer for you. I need help at Phantoms, our nightclub.
“I know you have a son and a full schedule right now. But, we could start out small and add more hours when you figure out a schedule that works for you,” he says, picking up the sheet we’ve been working on for the last hour. “And, I may move you up to our accountant when you finish your degree.”
“Well, can I let you know tomorrow. I’ll need to talk to Wood, Boy Scout, and Kim about Wade,” I ask, knowing this is one more step in the right direction.
“Yeah. Let me know tomorrow mornin’. Now let’s get this shit finished. Pretty soon you won’t need any of my help,” he says, a smile gracing his face and making him appear softer and gentler. Like a man I didn’t have to shrink back from because of the fear he provoked in me.
So, I started working at Phantom four nights a week. Wood and Boy Scout take shifts watching over me while the other one stays home with Wade. If they need to go take care of club business, Kim is with Wade and Alex is here watching me.
For now, I bartend and take over different areas on the floor when the girls take their breaks. Most of the time I’m so busy working I forget to take a break. But, I like working there, and I don’t have to worry about the bitches like Collette and Ginger when I’m there. I’ve even helped out a time or two at the clubhouse when they were busy and the Prospects weren’t fast enough to serve the men their drinks. Slim has noticed every move I make, and I can’t tell he likes the way I am now.
“J, where you at?” Boy Scout calls out as he makes his way through the small apartment to find me in the bedroom.
“You found me,” I say, a smile gracing my face as I get dressed for the day.
“We gotta talk,” he says, sitting down on the bed.
“Okay,” I respond, not liking the tone of his voice at all.
“Listen, I know we have a ton of shit to work out. But, I think it’s time that you and Wade move into the house. It would be so much easier than it is right now,” he says, standing up to pull me in his arms. “I know you have a list of reasons not to do this, but at the same time, there’s so much you’d gain from livin’ with us.”
“I know. And I’ve been thinkin’ about it a lot lately. Let’s talk tonight. I’m gonna follow Slim’s advice and let you guys in. Tonight, you both learn why I am the way I am. And we’ll see what you have to say after you hear that.”
“Nothin’ is gonna change our minds,” he tells me, sitting back down and pulling me on his lap. “I got more shit in my past than either one of you know. If you’re gonna open up tonight and let us in on your past, then I’ll open up and let you both in on mine too. Maybe it’s me you guys won’t want.”
I look up into his eyes. There’s a darkness and sadness lingering just below the surface. It’s a look I imagine is mirrored in my own eyes on a regular basis. One that gives away the kind of pain we hold inside because of our past. Even if we didn’t cause what happened to us, it’s still our guilt and burden to bare.
That’s not something that a lot of people understand. Looking into Boy Scout’s eyes, I get that he’s got a troubled past and he’s willing to relive that past and let the memories flow freely while he tells Wood and I of his past.
The day has seemed to drag on the more I thought about sitting down and having this conversation with the guys. But, if Boy Scout can tell us what haunts his past and has demons chasing him, then I can make sure I open myself in the same way. It’s going to be hard as fuck to do, and I’m sure I’ll break down a time or two, but that’s okay. In a way, I think it will be freeing to finally share my past with someone else. Someone that’s stronger than me and can help me fight the demons and the darkness away.
I just start dinner when I hear the familiar rumble of bikes pulling into the complex. If I’ve learned anything since living here, it’s that a bike doesn’t always mean that Wood or Boy Scout is here. Guys come in to see the other girls that were moved in here when they got moved to Benton Falls. Still, my heartrate increases in anticipation of seeing them, getting ready to have dinner, putting Wade to bed, and finally having this talk.
It’s a minute later, the door open and I hear the conversation the two men are in the middle of. I’m not sure what it’s about, so I give them the privacy they need as the door shuts and their booted feet stop just behind it. Well, that is until Wade stands up and runs to see his friends.
They’ve gotten Wade to fall in love with them. Both men sit on the floor and play with him, they watch cartoons in the morning while I’m cleaning up from breakfast or getting ready to head out, and they help me get him ready for bed. From time to time, they even go in and read a bedtime story to him with me. It’s not often because they know it’s something I treasure doing, and they don’t want to intrude on the nights I’m home and can do it. When I’m not home, I know one of them will be the one tucking him in and reading to him. It’s comforting to know and makes my heart swell, chipping away another layer of ice from my heart.
“Spitfire, what’s for dinner?” Wood asks walking into the kitchen and wrapping his arms around my waist before placing a kiss to the side of my neck.
“Spaghetti. I figured quick and easy tonight so we can get him to bed and talk before going there ourselves,” I say, leaning back into his touch.
“Sounds good. Need any help?” he asks, not removing his arms from me while resting his head on my shoulder to watch me chop the onions and peppers that I’ll put in with the ground beef before adding it to the sauce.
“Nope. I got this
,” I reply, standing up so that I don’t chop a finger off or anything like that.
“I’ll jump in the shower after Boy Scout so we’ll be ready when dinner is,” he says, walking into the living room so I can spend a few minutes with Wade.
Boy Scout makes his way into the kitchen once he’s done with his shower. He’s not wearing a shirt, and his longish brown hair is dripping so that little water droplets run down his chest and back. I watch one slide down the middle of his chest before looking up into his eyes. His eyes darken as I pull my lower lip into my mouth and bite down on it. My eyes drift back down to the water that’s dangerously close to sliding under the waistband of his loose sweats.
“Babe, you keep lookin’ at me like that and I’m not gonna be able to wait for you to decide you’re ready. You have no idea what that look is tellin’ me right now,” he mumbles, stepping into my space and crowding me against the counter.
I can feel his hard body line up against my softer one as he lowers his head. His lips press against mine as a moan escapes me. Boy Scout takes this as his assurance to deepen the kiss. His tongue swipes my bottom lip before waiting for my gasp to slide it inside and tangle with mine.
A shiver runs through my body at the feeling of him against me and invading my mouth causes me to feel more than I’ve ever felt in my life. I know the feeling is the same whenever Wood touches me. It’s like they know exactly what I want and how bad I need to feel some sort of connection to them without having to voice that need aloud.
“Dinner smells good, babe,” he says, finally breaking the kiss.
I nod my head in response because I’m struggling to get my breathing under control again. If I feel like this and can’t catch my breath just from a kiss, what’s it going to be like when I finally have sex with them for the first time?
Part of me can’t wait to find out, while the part that’s scared to death tries to tell me to keep my libido under wraps and not let them get more of me than what they’ve already had. A few touches and kisses here and there, and that’s just over the last few months.
