by L. P. Dover
“What the hell? You scared me,” she exclaimed, lifting her head. Over my shoulder she saw Gabriella and her face softened.
“Megan, can you come out here with me?” Gabriella asked sweetly. “I think they need some private time.”
So this girl was Megan. She was beautiful. I should’ve known that one of Ryley’s close woman friends would be gorgeous. A knowing smile spread across Megan’s face and she nodded. “Sure thing, girlfriend.” She then turned to Ryley. “I’ll meet you outside at the car.”
Ryley nodded at her and then busied himself with taking off his gloves. He still hadn’t looked at me. Once the door shut and everyone was gone, I didn’t waste any time. “Ryley, please stop ignoring me. I need you to talk to me.”
“I think I’ve said everything I need to say. I told you before you were wasting your time. Why can’t you leave me alone? I don’t want you.”
“Then look at me and say it,” I thundered. Charging over to him, I smacked his bag away, grabbing his face with my hands. “I love you, Ryley, and I need you to stop lying to me. Look me in the eyes and say the words. If you tell me you don’t love me, I’ll walk out that door and you’ll never see me again.” Tears blossomed in my eyes and all I could think about was the baby inside of my womb. “If letting you go is truly what you need, I’ll do it.”
Relentlessly, my heart pounded and tears fell down my cheeks. He stared at me and I could feel him leaning closer, his lips almost touching mine. Instead of kissing me, he took my hands and pulled them away from his face. Looking straight into my eyes, he sighed and shook his head. “I don’t love you, Ashleigh. I never have and I never will.”
My world shattered in that instant and everything came crashing down. I couldn’t stand to look at him any longer, so I turned around and rushed out of the room, running as fast as I could. There were people everywhere, but they bolted out of my way when I went storming past. I had to get out of there, away from the humiliation and rejection. It was over. Shock was consuming me; I never really believed he’d say the words.
“Ashleigh, stop,” Gabriella yelled. I was almost to the door but her grip on my arm forced me to halt. When I turned, her face fell and she pulled me into her arms. “Holy hell, what did he say to you?”
Holding onto her, I burst into tears and closed my eyes. “He looked me in the eyes . . .” I choked. “He looked me in the eyes and said he never loved me and he never will. I don’t know what to do. This isn’t happening. This just can’t be happening.”
“Shh . . . don’t worry, Ash. It’ll all be okay. I’ll take you back to the hotel and you can rest. I’ll handle everything from here.”
There was nothing she could do. It was over.
WHEN YOU THINK about words, you never really put it into context how strong they could actually be when spoken. I had gone too far and the second Ashleigh ran away from me, I regretted the harsh response. Hurting her was my goal . . . I didn’t plan on breaking her. Dammit. I let my anger and pain get in the way. Before I could rush after her¸ Gabriella beat me to it and took off down the hall. How could I be so fucking stupid?
“Ryley, are you okay?” Megan asked, coming into my room. “What did you say to her?”
Grabbing my bag, I slung it over my shoulder and started for the door. “Something I shouldn’t have. Let’s go to the party and see if they show up. I have to find her.”
Once outside, I texted Gabriella but she never responded or called back. That didn’t surprise me, considering I just tore her best friend’s heart in two. Hopefully, they would be at the party. It took ten agonizing minutes to get to the house and when we pulled up, there were cars everywhere, but I didn’t see Gabriella’s or Ashleigh’s. Fuck my life.
“All right, Ry, I’m going inside. Are you going to wait out here for them?”
Holding my phone, I texted Gabriella again and nodded my head. “Yeah. I don’t even know if they’re going to show up.”
“I have faith you’ll find her. Good luck, and call me if you need anything.”
Her heels clicked on the driveway as she walked away and I was left to myself. Ten minutes later, I was still sitting there in shock, staring into nothingness, when Gabriella sped down the street and squealed her tires coming to a stop in front of me.
She opened her car door and slammed it shut. “What the fuck is your problem? Do you have any idea what you just did?”
“I was angry, Gabby. What do you want me to say? I wanted her to feel the pain that I did when she left. I thought it would make me feel better.”
She crossed her arms over her chest. “And did it?”
I lowered my head. “No. It made me feel worse.”
“Good. Because she’s a hot mess right now. She loves you, Ryley, but I don’t know how much more she can handle. I’m pretty sure she’s hit her limit.”
“Where is she?” I asked solemnly.
Gabriella sighed and squeezed the bridge of her nose. “She’s at the hotel bawling her eyes out. She doesn’t know I’m here.”
“Take me to her,” I commanded. “I have to tell her I’m sorry.”
Her eyes went wide. “Does this mean you’re giving in and forgetting your macho bullshit?”
“I’m done, Gabby. Keeping her away is only making it worse.”
Reaching in her purse, she pulled out a room key and handed it to me. “Here’s the key to our room, the number is on it. Go there and talk to her. I’ll stay here to give you some time.” Holding the key in my hand, I closed my eyes. Please don’t let it be too late.
I DON’T KNOW how long I cried, but it felt like an eternity. The pillow was stained from my tears and mascara. My chest ached, making my whole body sore. Gabriella had turned off all the lights and told me she would be right back, but she had yet to come back. I wanted to be alone anyway to wallow in my grief and despair. I was to blame for my own misery, but Ryley’s words pierced straight through my soul. Not only did he rip my heart in two, but he took away all my hope.
The door to the hotel room opened and clicked shut, footsteps shuffling across the floor. My eyes were basically swollen shut from crying, but I heard the bedroom door open. I didn’t want Gabriella feeling like she had to babysit me.
“Gabby, please go to the party,” I whispered hoarsely. “You don’t have to stay with me.” The bed dipped low and a strong arm wrapped around my waist, pulling me in tight.
“No, she doesn’t . . . but I do.”
I froze and held in my gasp. Ryley’s scent filled my senses and I couldn’t tell if I was hallucinating or not. I touched his hands, they were real. I could feel his breath on my ear. It was all real. “Are you really here?” I cried, swallowing hard. “Please tell me it’s not a dream.”
Turning me over, his hands covered my cheeks. I tried to focus on him, but in the darkness, I couldn’t really see much of anything. But I could feel him, and smell him.
“It’s not a dream, angel.” And then, the moment I had been waiting for finally came. His lips were warm as they closed over mine, and I willingly opened to him when he pushed his tongue inside. My whole body tingled and sparked to life under his touch. I felt alive again.
“Wait,” I pleaded, quickly remembering the past hour. I moved away from him and turned the lamp on.
He squinted under the bright light and my breath hitched at the sight of him. There was no anger in his face, only sadness and regret. A small smile splayed across his face when he looked down at the Team Ryley printed on my T-shirt.
“Why are you here? You said you didn’t love me anymore, that you never could.”
He swallowed hard and lowered his head. “I know, and I wish I could take it back. It was a lie, angel. I’ve never stopped loving you, even after you left.”
I closed my eyes and squeezed them hard, still not believing he was real. “Then why did you lie?” I glanced wearily over at him.
“Because I wanted you to feel the pain I felt when you left me. I wanted to see your heart break . . . ma
ybe just to prove that it could be broken over me—that you really did still love me.”
“But you didn’t break it,” I cried, “You ripped it apart.”
He nodded. “And that’s why I’m done. I can’t hurt you anymore. I watched you walk away once, I refuse to let you go again.” Closing the distance, he took my hand and pulled me to him. I laid down, facing him, memorizing every single line and angle of his face. His lips parted when I brushed my fingers across them, so soft. Following my lead, he brought his hands up and caressed my face, never taking his gaze off mine. I don’t know how long we stared at each other, but it felt good to be in his arms again.
For the first time in over a month, I could breathe. Time stood still and even though I didn’t want to miss a single moment, my eyes drifted shut and I succumbed to the peace he offered me. I wasn’t going to let him go.
I don’t know how long we were asleep, but when I woke up it was still dark outside and the light was on in the room. Ryley slept peacefully beside me, his arm tucked tightly around my waist. My heart hurt thinking about all of the nights I wasted when I could’ve been with him—not missing a single moment together. Gently, I trailed my fingers down his chest to the waistband of his jeans. He jerked with my touch, but his slow, deep breaths showed he was still asleep. I ran my hands over his groin and massaged his growing arousal, smiling when his eyes began to open.
“Now this is how I like to be woken up,” he teased, his voice gruff with sleep.
I played with him more and his cock bulged thick and hard behind his jeans. Climbing on top of me, he pushed his groin against me and rocked his hips. Holy hell, I wanted him to make love to me. He brought his hands to my breasts and massaged them through my shirt while kissing along my collarbone. My breasts felt heavy, sensitive. I couldn’t get enough.
“I missed you,” I whispered. “There wasn’t a day that went by when I didn’t think about you.” He moved against me more rapidly and the friction drove me insane. By the heated look in his eyes, he was close to losing control. I wasn’t far from it either.
“I missed you too, angel.” He trailed his fingers down my cheek, and neck, all the way down to the hem of my shirt. His visage darkened, expression serious. “If we do this there’s no going back. I can’t lose you again.”
Gently, I took his face in my hands and caressed his jaw stubble with my thumbs. “I’m not going anywhere. I can promise you that.” My lips lifted to his, sealing the promise I just made.
His fingers tightened on my breast and in one swift move my shirt was over my head and he had my bra undone, lowering his mouth to my nipple. He bit and sucked, rolling his tongue across my peak while I squirmed beneath him, wanting more. The tension grew with each touch and I could feel his control slipping. Abruptly, he slid away and took off his shirt and jeans, tossing them on the floor, exposing the hardness between his legs.
Opening my legs to make room for his body, he pressed his hips into me and unbuttoned my jeans. Without looking away, he lowered them down my legs, licking his lips. I shivered in anticipation, my clit throbbing relentlessly.
Gently, he pushed a finger inside and then another, stretching me. He smiled in delight when he licked the wetness off of his fingers. “Do I need to put on a . . .”
“No,” I interrupted softly, wishing I could tell him the truth. “We’ll be okay.”
Placing his hand on my cheek, he lowered his lips to mine and settled his body between my legs. He pushed in just a little and circled his hips to spread my wetness on his cock. Once I stretched around him, he thrust all the way in, making me arch off the bed with a loud moan.
“Fuck, I missed this,” he growled. I missed it too.
It couldn’t have been more than a few minutes, but I wasn’t able to hold out any longer. My orgasm felt like it exploded from the inside out, tearing me apart and putting me back together. I screamed with my release at the same time Ryley dug his fingers into my skin and spilled his come inside of me, his cock pulsing with the aftershocks. For a long moment, we laid there staring at each other—so many things left unsaid. But for now, it was enough just to be in his arms and to know that things were about to change.
Please God don’t let me wake up and it all be a dream.
WAKING UP, I laid in bed without opening my eyes. I took inventory of my body, noticing the small pains here and there. It was just confirmation that last night had really happened, and I smiled before stretching and rolling over. Ryley was beside me, his lips spreading into a smile when my gaze focused on him.
“I thought you’d never wake up,” he teased, running his fingers down my bare arm. I shivered and curled into his chest, nuzzling my cheek against his skin.
“I could’ve sworn last night was just a dream. You have no idea how many nights I dreamt of us together, only to wake up and nothing.”
“I had those nights too, angel. But right now, we need to get back home. Check out is in forty-five minutes.” Lifting the sheets, he climbed out of bed, stark naked, and my insides clenched to have him again.
“Are you sure you don’t want to stay in bed with me?” When he turned around, I pinched my nipples and rolled them between my fingers.
His cock instantly got hard and he groaned. “Fuck, you’re going to kill me. But Gabriella’s in the next room, I heard her talking to someone on the phone. I think she’s worried about you.”
Ryley went to the bathroom and brought me a robe. I slid it on while he put on his clothes. When he was done, he grabbed my hand and gave me a kiss. “I’m going to run to my room, take a shower, and change clothes. I’ll be back down in a minute, okay? This should give you a little time to catch up with Gabby. She was pretty pissed at me last night.”
“Yes, I was,” she called out from the living room. Once my robe was tied, I opened the bedroom door and her eyes instantly found mine. She beamed when she saw Ryley and me together. “Hot damn, it’s about time you two got your shit straight. I thought I was going to have to kick both your asses.”
“His maybe,” I said, pointing to Ryley.
He chuckled and wrapped his arm around my waist, kissing the side of my head. “What can I say? I’m a quirky son of a bitch, it’s part of my charm. I’ll be right back.”
Gabriella stopped him before he could walk out the door. “Oh, and just so you know, Megan and I are riding back to California together. That way you and Ash can catch up. Judging by the level of your disheveled appearance, I don’t think you got much talking done last night.”
Ryley winked and smiled before closing the door, leaving me to Gabriella’s teasing. Except now that Ryley was gone, her smile faded and she handed me my phone.
“Colin has been calling you nonstop, Ash. He’s starting to get on my nerves.”
“What did you tell him?” I asked, dialing his number.
“I told him you were sleeping. Are you sure you can’t move up the doctor’s appointment? Until you find out for sure he’s not the father, he’s going to be hounding your ass. Not to mention he’ll probably cause problems between you and Ryley once he finds out that you two are back together. It’s going to be a shit storm.”
Groaning, I hit the send button and waited on him to pick up. I loved him, but Gabriella was right. He wasn’t going to leave me alone until I could prove that my child was Ryley’s. I had no doubt the baby was Ryley’s. I could feel it in my blood.
“Ash, thank God. Where the fuck have you been? I tried calling you last night and all morning,” he snapped worriedly.
“Colin, I’m fine. I just got up and we’re about to leave Sacramento and head home. How’s camp going?”
“Actually, it’s going pretty good. They say I’m one of the best pitchers they’ve seen in years. Which will be good for when the pro teams start looking for new players.”
“That’s great. You’ll be able to travel and see new places. I think I’m jealous,” I teased, hoping to break the tension.
“You’ll be coming with me too, Ash. Yo
u and the baby. We can see it all together.”
Hello tension. Back so soon? Sighing, I sat down on the couch while Gabriella stared at me, biting her lip. She knew the shit was about to hit the fan. “Colin, that’s not going to happen,” I murmured regretfully.
The line went silent, but then his angry voice came back over the line. “You’re there with him, aren’t you? That’s why you went with Gabriella. It wasn’t to see her, it was to see him.”
“Why do you sound so shocked?” I countered. “I love him, Colin. The baby I’m carrying is his. I have no doubt about it.”
He scoffed. “But you love me too. And as far as the baby goes, you can’t determine that it’s Ryley’s because you think it is. Until your appointment, there’s still a chance. I’m not letting you go.”
“You don’t have a choice,” I replied sadly. “I choose him and it’ll always be him.”
“Things can change, Ash. I’ll see you tomorrow.” And with those last words, he hung up.
Throwing my phone on the couch, I hung my head and groaned. “What the fuck am I going to do, Gabby? He’s not going to go down without a fight.”
“Yeah, I could hear him through the phone. But I guess it’s a good thing Ryley’s not going to let you go either. It looks like you have a lot of talking to do on your way home. Are you going to tell him about the baby?”
“I can’t. It’s too soon. I’ll tell him about Colin being in my life, but I can’t just get back with him and dump something else in his lap.”
Gabriella nodded. “I understand, but men don’t think like we do. He might see it as deceitful when you told Colin and not him.”
Throwing my hands in the air, I huffed and stalked into the bedroom. “Well, I was hoping Colin would see it as a sign that we weren’t meant to be together. But no! Now he has this false hope that the baby is his. It completely backfired.”
