All the way to the church she tried to keep her mind off Cody and on the service that was to come. Her best efforts, however, were a dismal failure. She kept envisioning Cody, wondering how he was holding up, worrying how he and all of his brothers were doing and regretting more than she could say that she couldn’t take her place with them and offer the support she desperately wanted to give.
She was so late that she planned to slip into the back of the church and stand in the shadows. Cody would never know she was there. The last thing she wanted to do today was add to his misery.
She ran up the steps of the old church just as the bells were chiming in the tall white steeple. The sun peeked through the clouds for just an instant, creating a terrible glare. Going from that sudden bright sun outside into the church’s dimly lit interior, she was momentarily blinded.
Apparently, whoever was hard on her heels was having the same problem because he slammed smack into her, his body rock solid as he hit her at full tilt. The contact almost sent her sprawling on the polished wood floor.
“Sorry,” he said, gripping her elbows to keep her upright. “You okay, darlin’?”
Melissa’s heart climbed straight into her throat. She would have recognized that voice, that automatic flirtatiousness, even if she hadn’t heard it for a hundred years. The firm, steadying touch was equally familiar and just as devastating. If she’d brushed against a live wire, she couldn’t have felt any more electrified.
“Cody?”
She spoke his name in no more than a whisper, but at the sound of her voice, he jerked his hands away as if he’d just touched a white-hot flame.
“Excuse me,” he said, his voice instantly like ice.
As if she were a stranger, he shoved past her to make his way to the front of the church. No, she corrected, if she’d been a stranger, he would have been less rude, more solicitous.
Trembling from the unexpected face-to-face meeting, Melissa watched him stride up the aisle to join his father and his brothers in the first pew. In that single quick glimpse, she had seen new lines in his face. His sun-streaked, normally untamed hair had been trimmed neatly in the way his mother had always wanted it to be.
It was his eyes, though, that had stunned her. Once they’d been filled with so much laughter. Naturally she had expected to find sorrow today in the dark-as-coffee depths. What she hadn’t anticipated was the cold antipathy when he recognized her, followed by an emptiness that was worse than hatred.
Well, she thought despondently, now she knew. Cody hadn’t forgiven her. He’d looked straight through her as if he’d never known her, as if he’d never teased her or made love to her or shared his deepest, darkest secrets with her.
“Oh, God,” she murmured in what could have been the beginning of a prayer, but instead simply died before completion. Their relationship was clearly beyond even divine intervention. She’d known it all along, of course, but she hadn’t wanted to believe it. The last flicker of hope in her heart died like a candle flame in a chilly wind.
Though a part of her wanted to flee, she moved into the deepest shadows and stayed through the service, grieving not just for the woman lying in the flower-draped casket, but for the death of her own dreams.
* * *
“You went to the funeral, didn’t you?” Velma Horton asked the minute Melissa walked through her mother’s doorway to pick up her daughter after work.
“How did you know?” she asked, though it was easy enough to guess. The grapevine had probably been buzzing all afternoon and her mother was definitely tapped into that.
Her mother sniffed. “You think I didn’t know why you wore that dress today. I know what you said, some nonsense about all your jeans being in the laundry, but I’m not a fool, girl. I knew you wouldn’t miss a chance to catch sight of Cody. So, did you see him?”
“Briefly,” Melissa admitted.
“And?”
“And what? We didn’t talk.”
“Then you didn’t tell him about Sharon Lynn.”
Melissa shook her head. “He wouldn’t care,” she said with absolute certainty that was based on the way he’d looked straight through her for the second time in their lives.
To her surprise, her mother breathed a sigh of relief and some of the tension drained out of her expression. “Good.”
There were times, like now, when Melissa didn’t understand her mother at all. When Velma had learned her daughter was pregnant, she’d been all for chasing Cody to the ends of the earth and demanding he take responsibility for his actions.
“I thought you wanted him to know,” Melissa said, regarding her mother with confusion. “There was a time you threatened to go to Harlan and demand that he drag Cody back here. You thought he owed me his name and his money. The only thing that stopped you was Daddy’s threat to divorce you if you did.”
Velma rolled her eyes. “Your father’s got more pride than sense. Anyway, that was before Sharon Lynn was born, back when I didn’t know how you’d manage by yourself. Seems to me you’ve done just fine. There’s no sense in trying to fix what’s not broke.”
It was a reasonable explanation for the turnaround, but Melissa didn’t entirely buy it. “There’s something else, isn’t there? Some other reason you don’t want Cody to find out the truth?”
“There is,” her mother admitted, an ominous note in her voice. “Harlan Adams is a powerful man.”
“That’s not news. What’s your point? What does he have to do with this? It’s between me and Cody.”
“Not if Harlan gets it into his head to claim his granddaughter,” her mother stated, a note of genuine fear in her voice. “There’s no way we could fight a man like that.”
Melissa was stunned by what her mother was suggesting. “Don’t you think you’re being a little paranoid? Jordan’s known for almost a year now and he hasn’t even spilled the beans. I suspect the rest of the family will react with just as much indifference.”
Her mother didn’t seem to be reassured. “Just watch your step. I’m warning you, Melissa, keep that baby as far away from Cody Adams as you can.”
Though she didn’t think the warning was necessary, Melissa nodded dutifully. “I don’t think we have to worry about that. Cody will probably be gone before we know it.”
Just then the sounds of her daughter’s cheerful, nonsensical babbling echoed down the narrow hallway. Melissa smiled. Her heart suddenly felt lighter than it had all day. The baby had had that effect on her from the moment she’d been born.
“Did she just wake up?” she asked as she started toward her old bedroom.
“I doubt she’s even been asleep. She didn’t want to go down for her nap. I think she sensed the tension in both of us. You go on in. I’m going to fix your daddy’s dinner.”
Melissa went to pick up her daughter from the crib her mother had put up next to the twin bed Melissa had slept in for most of her life. Sharon Lynn was standing on shaky, pudgy little legs, hanging on to the crib rail. Her eyes lit up when she spotted her mother.
“Ma...ma...ma.”
“That’s right, darling girl,” Melissa crooned, gathering her into her arms. “I’m your mama.”
She inhaled the sweet talcum-powder scent of her baby and sighed as tiny little hands grabbed her hair and held on tight. “You’ve got quite a grip, little one. You must have gotten that from your daddy. I’m the original hundred-pound weakling.”
“Da?” Sharon Lynn repeated, echoing a sound Melissa had taught her while showing her a snapshot of Cody. Her mother would have pitched a royal fit if she’d known.
“Oh, baby,” she murmured, tightening her embrace. “Your daddy’s right here in town. He has no idea what he’s been missing all these months. He has no idea that he has a precious little girl.”
Cody would have made a wonderful father, she thought with a sigh. He would have been too indulg
ent by far, too readily conned by sweet talk and a winning smile, but, oh, how he would have cherished and protected a child of his. Her foolish actions had cost him the chance to prove that. Worse, they had cost her daughter a chance to be loved by an incredible man. There were days when she almost made herself sick with regrets.
“We do okay by ourselves, though, don’t we?” she asked, gazing into round, dark eyes that reminded her too much of Cody. The baby returned her gaze with the kind of serious, thoughtful look the question deserved. Melissa wondered how many years it would be before that innocent contemplation turned to something far more accusatory because her mother had robbed her of any contact with her father.
“Don’t,” her mother pleaded, coming up behind her.
“Don’t what?”
“Don’t tell him.”
“Who said I was going to?” Melissa asked.
“I know that look. You’re making up pipe dreams about what it will be like when Cody finds out he has a baby girl. You’re expecting him to declare he’s never stopped loving you and sweep you off to get married.”
Her expression turned dire. “It won’t be that way, I’m telling you. If he cares about the baby at all, he’ll take her from you. That’s how much he hates you for what you did to him. You made a fool of him in front of the whole town by going out with his best friend. A man never forgets a betrayal like that. I don’t care if it was just a bunch of foolishness on your part. The results were the same as if you and Brian had had something going.”
“You don’t know anything about Cody’s feelings,” Melissa argued, even though she had just seen with her own eyes that Cody did despise her. She didn’t want to believe he could be cruel enough to try to take their daughter away from her.
“Are you willing to take that chance?” her mother demanded.
The baby whimpered, either because she was picking up on the sudden tension or because Melissa was holding her too tightly. “No,” she whispered, fighting the sting of tears as she kissed her daughter’s silky cheek. “No, I’m not willing to take that chance.”
She had been weaving pipe dreams, just as her mother had guessed. The risk of trying to make them come true, though, was far too great. Rather than winning back Cody, she could very well lose her child. She would die before she let that happen. Sharon Lynn was the most important thing in her life.
All the way home she assured herself that she only needed a few days. If she kept the secret just a few more days, Cody would be gone and that would be the end of it.
Later that night she sank into the rocker beside Sharon Lynn’s crib and set it into motion, hoping to lull the baby to sleep and to quiet all those clamoring shouts in her head that told her she just might be making the second worst mistake in her life by keeping silent. As much as she hated to admit it, her mother was right about one thing. If Cody did learn the truth from someone else, there was no telling what he might do to exact revenge.
3
For the past two days Cody hadn’t been able to stop thinking about his brief meeting with Melissa at the funeral. She looked exactly as he’d remembered her, her long hair a tangle of fiery lights, her body slender as a reed except for the lush, unexpected curve of her breasts.
Even before he’d heard her voice, in that instant when he’d caught her to prevent her from falling, he’d known it was her just from the way his body had reacted to touching her. He had hated that reaction, hated knowing that his desire for her hadn’t waned at all despite the months of self-imposed exile. That seemed like the cruelest sort of punishment.
Late that night after the funeral he’d been pacing downstairs when his father had come out of his office and caught him. Harlan had guessed right off that his agitation had to do with Melissa, though he’d been uncommonly cautious in broaching the subject.
“I thought I saw Melissa at the church today,” Harlan had said casually after he’d pulled Cody into his office and they were both seated in comfortable leather chairs in front of a blazing fire, glasses of whiskey in hand. At the reference to Melissa, Cody had put his aside without tasting it. He’d feared if he got started, he’d never stop.
“She was there,” he’d conceded, his voice tight.
“Did you get a chance to talk to her?”
“We have nothing to say to each other.”
“I see,” Harlan said. He’d let the silence build for a bit, taking a sip of his drink before adding nonchalantly, “I heard she’s been working at Dolan’s Drugstore, running the soda fountain for Eli. Doing a good job, too. Eli says business is up. The kids are hanging out there again instead of driving to the fast-food place out on the highway.”
Cody hadn’t even acknowledged the information. He’d just tucked it away for later consideration. Ever since, he’d been considering what to do about it.
He could drive into town, march into Dolan’s and confront Melissa about what she’d done to him, something he probably should have done the very night he’d found her with Brian. He could raise the kind of ruckus that would be the talk of the town for the next year. It would go into the textbook of Cody Adams lore that had begun when he was barely into puberty. If half the tales had been true, he would have worn himself out by the time he was twenty.
Sighing, he conceded he couldn’t see much point to adding another wild exploit to his reputation. A scene would only rake up old news, embarrass Melissa—not that he cared much about that—and tell anyone with half a brain that Cody wasn’t over her. Otherwise, why would he bother to stir up the cold ashes of their very dead relationship?
No, for the sake of his own pride if nothing else, it was better to stay the hell away from town. He repeated the advice to himself like a mantra, over and over, until he should have gotten it right.
Even as his old red pickup sped toward town late Tuesday morning, he was muttering it to himself, swearing that he’d have lunch with Luke and Jordan at Rosa’s Mexican Café, then turn right around and go back to White Pines. A couple of beers and a plate of Rosa’s spiciest food would wipe all thoughts of Melissa straight out of his head.
Unfortunately he hadn’t counted on his brothers getting into the act. He’d been certain that they would leave the subject of his love life alone. He hadn’t counted on the fact that both of them were now happily married and apparently intent on seeing that he took the plunge, too.
“Hey, Cody, why don’t you drop by Dolan’s as long as you’re in town?” Jordan suggested after they’d eaten. He said it with all the innocence of Harlan at his matchmaking best.
“Any particular reason I should?” he inquired, refusing to fall into Jordan’s trap.
He lifted the cold bottle of beer to his lips and took a long, slow drink just to show how unaffected he was by the prospect of seeing Melissa, whom Jordan clearly knew worked at Dolan’s. This was probably the whole reason his brothers had suggested meeting in town in the first place rather than gathering at White Pines. They’d been plotting behind his back to try to force a reunion between Cody and his ex-lover.
“They still have the best milk shakes in the whole state of Texas,” Luke chimed.
“We’ve just eaten enough food to stuff a horse,” Cody stated flatly.
Luke and Jordan exchanged a look.
“Worried about your handsome figure?” Luke taunted.
Cody scowled at his oldest brother’s nonsense. “No.”
Luke went on as if he’d never spoken. “Because if that’s it, I’m sure they have diet sodas in there, served up by the sweetest gal in all of Texas, or so I hear.”
“I don’t want a milk shake. I don’t want a diet soda. There is nothing that drugstore has that I want,” he said pointedly, scowling first at Luke and then at Jordan.
“Sounds to me like a man who’s protesting too much,” Jordan observed. “What does it sound like to you, Lucas?”
“Definitely a man who�
�s scared out of his britches,” Luke agreed.
Cody drew himself up indignantly. “Scared of what? A milk shake?”
“Maybe not that,” Luke conceded. “How about Melissa Horton?”
Ah, a direct hit. Cody sighed. “I am not scared of Melissa,” he said with extreme patience. “I feel absolutely nothing for Melissa.”
“Cluck, cluck, cluck,” Luke murmured, making a pitiful attempt to mimic a chicken.
The sound grated on Cody’s nerves. He balled his hands into fists. He hadn’t gotten into a rip-roaring fight with his big brothers in a very long time, but Luke was pushing every one of his buttons. And, from the teasing glint in his eyes, his big brother knew it, too. Even Jordan sensed that his patience was at an end. He eased his chair between them, a conciliatory expression on his face.
“Now, Luke, don’t rile Cody,” he said blandly. “If he says he doesn’t want to talk to Melissa, then who are we to interfere?”
Cody didn’t exactly trust Jordan’s sudden taking of his side. Jordan had a knack for sneak attacks that could cripple a business adversary before he even knew he was under seige. Cody eyed him warily.
“That’s true,” Luke conceded, his turnaround just as suspicious. “Daddy meddled in our lives enough that we should be more sensitive to Cody’s feelings. Besides, Melissa probably doesn’t want to see him any more than he wants to see her.”
“Why? Is she involved with someone?” Cody asked, regretting the words the instant they slipped out of his mouth. The triumphant expressions on Luke’s and Jordan’s faces were enough to set his teeth on edge.
Jordan stood as if he’d just recalled a business crisis that couldn’t be put off. “Come on, Luke. We’ve obviously accomplished our mission here,” he said blithely. “The man is on the hook. Let’s leave him to decide whether to wiggle off or take the bait.”
“A fascinating metaphor,” Luke commented, joining Jordan. He glanced back at Cody. The teasing glint in his eyes faded. “Don’t be a damned fool, little brother. Go see the woman. You know you want to. It’s time you settled things with her once and for all. We want you back here for good.”
Winter's Proposal Page 3
