For a time, Janet had been fooled by her ex’s superficial evidence of concern and pride. Now that she’d observed Harlan Adams for a couple of weeks, especially when Cody was around to banter with him, she had seen what a genuine family was all about. What she and Barry and Jenny had shared had been a mockery of the real thing, more feigned than substantive.
She watched now as Harlan fixed an attentive look on Jenny. That was the gaze Barry had never quite mastered, an expression of real interest. Seeing it warmed Janet through and through and further endangered her already shaky determination to keep Harlan at a distance.
“Of course I’m interested in your opinion,” he assured Jenny. “And if you’re going to be in an advanced class, you must be pretty smart.”
“My teacher in New York said my short stories and essays are really good,” Jenny admitted, pride shining in her eyes. “She said I could probably be a writer someday, if I want to be.”
“And do you want to be?” Harlan asked.
Jenny nodded, her expression suddenly shy as she revealed a dream that Janet knew she’d shared with almost no one. It was a tribute to the fragile trust flowering between Jenny and Harlan that she was telling him.
Once again, Janet couldn’t help thinking that the theft and subsequent accident that had brought Harlan Adams into their lives was turning out far better than she’d had any right to expect, especially for Jenny. It made her more determined than ever not to do anything to shake the trust the two of them were establishing, even if it cost her a chance with Harlan for herself.
“I’m going to write about Native Americans,” Jenny said. “I want to tell all the stories that Lone Wolf told Mom.”
“And who was Lone Wolf?”
“He was my great-great-grandfather. He died way before I was born.”
Harlan glanced at Janet. “But you spent time with him?”
“Just one summer,” she admitted sorrowfully. “My father didn’t want me spending time with my Comanche relatives. He said I’d grow up wild and out of control. One year, though, my mother insisted. She sent me to stay with Lone Wolf on the reservation in Oklahoma. It was the best summer of my life.”
“Which almost explains why you ended up in Texas when your marriage ended,” Harlan said. “Why here and not Oklahoma?”
Janet flushed guiltily and avoided Jenny’s knowing gaze. “Because he talked about Texas a lot and the days when our ancestors lived here,” she said, leaving it at that.
Harlan didn’t appear convinced. “Something tells me there’s a lot more to it,” he said.
“Not really,” she denied. “I’m just following a little girl’s dream.”
He shrugged, finally accepting her at her word. “Then we’ll leave it at that for now,” he said.
There was no mistaking the implication that he wouldn’t leave the topic alone for long. Janet wondered how well her resolve would stand up to any real grilling by this man with the coaxing eyes and persuasive charm.
And more and more she was wondering whether she’d be able to go on battling the warm feelings he was stirring in her, the kind of feelings she’d vowed never to allow to deceive her again.
Harlan Adams struck her as a complicated man of many passions. She could only guess how well she would fare if she became one of them. For her own sake, as well as Jenny’s, she hoped the moment of truth would be a long time coming.
“Maybe you should think about spending the weekend here,” Harlan suggested just then, startling her. Her panic must have shown because he quickly added, “I’ve got a whole library filled with works by Poe. Jenny could do all the research she wants right here.”
As generous and innocent-sounding as the offer was, Janet was shaking her head before the words were out of his mouth. “No, really, it’s impossible. We’re not prepared for an overnight stay.”
His gaze settled on her in a provocative way that made her pulse race. “The closet’s always filled with extra toothbrushes, if that’s what has you worried,” he said.
Janet felt her cheeks flame. He knew precisely what had her worried, and it definitely wasn’t toothbrushes or the lack of them. “Thanks for the offer, but no,” she said firmly.
“Come on back in the morning then,” he said.
In giving in more gracefully than she’d expected, he almost left her feeling disappointed. Obviously she needed to work a little on her backbone. It was apparently as limp as an overcooked strand of spaghetti.
“Jenny can do her research and you and I could go riding,” he prodded when she remained silent. “You still haven’t seen all of White Pines.”
Janet felt Jenny’s wary gaze on her, but she avoided meeting her daughter’s eyes. There were a lot of reasons to accept Harlan’s offer, beginning with the chance it would give her to explore the very land that her ancestors had once hunted on. Jenny couldn’t fault her for that.
There was also one very big reason to turn him down: he made her stomach do the most amazing flip-flops every single time he looked at her. If he could manage that after a few relatively brief encounters, what kind of havoc could he wreak during a whole day’s outing? In private? Without Jenny’s watchful gaze on them every minute?
Would there be more of those bone-melting kisses like the one that had thrown her so off stride on Sunday night? Without a doubt. The heated promise was in Harlan’s gaze every time he looked at her. Temptation heated her blood. Longing made her heart thump unsteadily. And the combination had her saying yes before she could stop herself.
Once the single affirmative word was out of her mouth, Janet wasn’t sure which of the three of them was most stunned. A pleased smile hovered on Harlan’s lips. Jenny retreated into sullen silence. And Janet considered whether a steel rod implant was necessary to stiffen her spine to the degree it needed.
“Shall we get an early start?” Harlan inquired. “Or are you one of those people who likes to laze in bed on the weekends?”
There was just enough seductive innuendo in the question to make her voice unsteady when she vowed that she could be there at any hour he liked.
He grinned. “Brave words,” he taunted. “I’ll give you a break just this once, though. You get here by ten. I’ll have Maritza pack us a picnic to take along.”
“For three,” Jenny said, scowling at her mother. “I want to come, too.”
“Thought you had a big paper to do,” Harlan said, but his eyes were glinting with amusement at Jenny’s obvious ploy to play chaperone once again.
“I’ll need a break,” she said. “Otherwise, my brain will probably bust.”
“Then by all means, you’ll come, too,” he replied. “Can’t have a tragedy like that on my head.”
If he was disappointed, he didn’t let it show. Clearly, he understood how important it was for Jenny to feel she wouldn’t be intruding.
For that, Janet decided, he would always have her gratitude. And, if he kept up the sweet gestures and the blatant provocation, he might very well wind up with her heart after all. Only time would tell just how terrible or incredible that fate might be.
* * *
Janet Runningbear was skittish as a brand-new colt, Harlan decided midway through their ride on Saturday. He’d never met a woman so determined to avoid being alone with a man.
Of course, Jenny was playing right into her mother’s hands by acting like the overprotective adult, rather than the other way around. He might have found it amusing and rather gratifying, if it hadn’t been so blasted frustrating.
He wanted to get to know this woman, but whenever he steered the conversation in a personal direction, she scooted it onto some other topic faster than a tornado could rip apart a house. He supposed for the first time in his life he was going to have to learn to be patient. His usual habit of making quick decisions and acting on them wasn’t going to work with Janet. If he pushed too hard, he knew
right now he’d scare her out of his life entirely.
He kept a close eye on her as they rode. She handled herself well in the saddle. Clearly, this wasn’t her first ride on horseback. She didn’t bat an eye when he picked up the pace. In fact, she shot him a daring look, dug in her heels and sent the mare he’d chosen for her into a flat-out gallop.
Laughing, Harlan didn’t even try to keep up. He was enjoying the view from behind too much. She was leaning low over the horse’s back. Her long black hair was caught up in a single, severe braid, but tendrils had escaped to curl defiantly along the back of her elegant, exposed neck. A longing to press a hot, lingering kiss to that bare skin washed through him with the ferocity of a summer storm, stunning him with its intensity.
She slowed after a bit, letting him and Jenny catch up.
“Where’d you learn to ride like that?” he asked. “Not in Central Park, I’ll bet.”
“Jeez, Mom, you never said you’d been on a horse before,” Jenny said, looking a little awestruck.
“I learned in Oklahoma that summer. It all came back to me. I remembered how it felt to have the wind in my face. It’s exhilarating.”
“It shows,” Harlan said quietly, his gaze locked with hers. “You’ve got some color in your cheeks for a change and your eyes are sparkling.”
Jenny shot him a suspicious frown, as if not quite certain whether he was making another pass at her mother right under her eyes.
“It’s the God’s truth,” Harlan insisted with a touch of defiance. “Jenny, take a good look at your mom. Have you ever seen her look so happy?”
Apparently by drawing Jenny into the appraisal of Janet’s appearance, he managed to allay her fears. She studied her mother, then nodded. “You do look spectacular, Mom. You should do this more.”
“Anytime,” Harlan said quickly, capitalizing on the small, inadvertent opening. “No need even to call first. If I’m not around, just leave me a note in the barn or let Maritza know you’re taking one of the horses out.”
“Thank you,” she said, rubbing the mare’s neck. “I may take you up on the offer. This has been incredible.”
Harlan locked gazes with her once more, refusing to break eye contact as he said, “And it’s just the beginning.”
Janet swallowed hard under his intense scrutiny. He enjoyed the knowledge that she was responding to him despite whatever reservations she might have. He was finally reassured that this attraction he’d been feeling from the beginning was returned, albeit with great reluctance.
“Come on, you two. I know the perfect spot for our picnic. It’s about a mile ahead.”
They ambled along at a comfortable pace for the next few minutes, picking their way through a denser stand of trees until they emerged on the shaded bank of a creek. It was too late in the season for the bluebonnets that usually dotted the area, but it was a tranquil, lovely setting just the same. Harlan had always enjoyed coming here when he needed to ponder some puzzle in his life. The serenity seemed to clear his head.
It was also a romantic spot for a picnic. He and Mary had stolen away here a time or two before she’d decided picnics were for youngsters and they needed more sedate and elegant entertainment. He’d always regretted that they no longer shared this spot and the simplicity of the hours they had once spent here.
He kept a close eye on Janet to gauge her reaction. A soft smile lit her face as she took in her surroundings. She sighed then with what looked to be sheer pleasure.
“Lone Wolf used to tell me about incredibly beautiful places just like this,” she murmured, lifting her eyes to meet his again. “I dreamed of finding one. Thank you for bringing us here.”
As if she sensed that the undercurrents between her mother and Harlan were getting too provocative and too intense, Jenny cut in. “I don’t see what’s so special. It’s just a dumb old creek. I saw the Atlantic Ocean a couple of times when Mom and Dad actually stopped working long enough to take me. Now that’s impressive,” she said, shooting a defiant look in his direction.
He grinned at her, refusing to take offense. “It is something, isn’t it? But appreciating the magnificence of one doesn’t mean you can’t recognize the beauty of the other. That would be like saying if you like Monet, you can’t like Grandma Moses. Or if you enjoy Bach, it’s not possible to appreciate the Beatles.”
He pointedly fixed his gaze on Janet when he added, “Seems to me the more experiences you open your heart to, the richer your life will be.”
Color rose in her cheeks as his implication sank in. Satisfied that she’d gotten his message, he nodded and busied himself with taking the picnic from the packs Maritza had prepared. He handed Janet a red-checked tablecloth.
“You pick the spot for that,” he suggested, then watched as she headed unerringly for his favorite place beneath an old cottonwood. It was the exact spot where he often sat, his back braced against the trunk of the tree as he waited for the sun to set and his tangled thoughts to unravel. He’d come a lot after Mary’s death, hoping for understanding and acceptance of the tragedy that had taken her.
Today, for the first time, with Janet and Jenny by his side, he thought maybe he’d found the reason for God’s choice. One door in his life had closed and another had opened. He couldn’t help wondering with a sense of tremendous anticipation what awaited him on this new adventure.
“You suddenly seem very far away,” Janet said quietly as she came to stand beside him.
Harlan noticed that Jenny had already stripped off her shoes and socks and was wading in the creek. For the moment he and Janet had a bit of privacy. He lifted his hand to her cheek in a light caress.
“No more,” he murmured. “Now I’m right here, with you.”
Worry darkened her eyes at once. “Harlan—”
He touched a finger to her lips. “Shh. For once, don’t argue. Let’s just see where this takes us. No promises. No commitments. No guarantees. Just be open to the possibilities. Can you do that?”
He felt her tremble beneath his touch, felt her skin heat and saw the glitter of excitement in her eyes. A sigh hovered on her lips before she finally nodded.
“I can try,” she agreed, looking anything but certain even as she spoke.
“That’s all anyone can ask.” He glanced toward the bank of the creek and saw that Jenny was still in view, even though she had her back to them for the moment.
He dropped his voice even lower. “I want very much to kiss you.” He allowed the thought to linger between them, allowed the color to climb in her cheeks and the anticipation to shine in her eyes before adding, “But I won’t. Not with Jenny so close by again.”
It might have been his imagination or wishful thinking, but he thought he detected disappointment shadowing the depths of her eyes even as she murmured her thanks.
He grinned. “That doesn’t mean I can’t tell you what I think kissing you would be like. Your mouth is soft as a rose petal, Janet Runningbear, and your breath is just as sweet. I love the way your eyes darken when my mouth is this close to yours,” he said, leaning down to within a hairbreadth of her lips, then retreating almost at once. This time he heard the shock of her indrawn breath and knew, absolutely knew, that what he saw in her eyes was disappointment.
He ran his thumb along her lower lip. “There will be other times,” he assured her. “Private times.”
He released her then, amused that she stood as if his hands were still on her, quiet and shaken. He hoped his own emotions weren’t half so apparent. One thing for sure, he wasn’t half as frightened of what the future might hold as she appeared to be. For the first time since they’d met, she seemed truly vulnerable.
For the life of him, he couldn’t decide if that was good or bad. Until he could figure it out, he settled for taming the electricity arcing through the air so they could get through the rest of the day without giving Jenny something more to fr
et about.
He winked at her. “Come on, woman. Why are you standing there? We’ve got fried chicken and potato salad and coleslaw to serve up. You must be starving after that ride.”
She visibly shook off the uncertainties that had held her still. “You’re right. I am famished.” She scanned the creek bank until she found Jenny, then called her, just a hint of desperation in her voice. “Come on, sweetie. Lunch is ready.”
Harlan settled himself in his favorite position against the tree and listened to Janet and Jenny chatter through lunch. If there was a nervous edge to the conversation, he chalked it up to the electricity that his best effort had failed to diffuse. For better or worse, the attraction humming between Janet and him was powerful stuff. It needed only a chance look, a casual touch, to set it off.
“Is the creek deep enough to swim in?” Jenny asked after they’d eaten. “I wore my suit under my jeans.”
“How’d you know about the creek and guess we’d be coming here?” Harlan asked, more amused than ever by her earlier grudging comparison of the creek to the ocean.
“Cody showed me,” she said, shrugging, her expression all innocence. “He said it was your favorite place. When you invited Mom to go riding, I knew you’d end up here.”
That explained the swimsuit and her earlier derisive reaction. The creek had probably looked much more interesting when she’d been here with Cody, Harlan decided. It also explained her determination to come along today. She hadn’t wanted her mother alone with him in such a romantic setting.
“Can I go in the water, Mom?”
“Not right after lunch,” Janet said at once.
“She’ll be fine,” Harlan said. “The creek’s only waist high at its deepest.”
Janet still seemed uneasy—about the swim or being left alone with him, it was hard to tell—but she gave permission.
“You could go in, too,” Harlan said when Jenny had run off.
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