Shannon tried to speak but couldn’t. The thought of having Whip so much a part of her made her feel hot and cold and shaking with a need she couldn’t name.
And Whip saw it, all of it, the hunger and the need.
«Hell, you wouldbegme,» he said, «because I can make you ache as much as I do right now. I can make the honey flow and the fire burn and —»
The sound of a door opening down the hallway cut off Whip’s seething words. He flinched as though a lash had been laid across his shoulders.
«Caleb?» Willow called softly from the hall.
«Just me, Willy,» Whip said, his voice low and rough.
Abruptly he moved so that Shannon was between him and the doorway where Willow would soon be.
«I was just talking to Shannon about that position you offered,» he said.
Willow appeared at the entrance to the living room. Her hair was mussed by sleep. She was rubbing her eyes and trying not to yawn.
«Oh, good,» Willow said, looking past Shannon to Whip. «Do you need anything?»
«No,» Whip said, smiling through his clenched teeth.
Willow yawned behind her hand.
«Wonderful,» she murmured. «I think I’ll sneak off to the bathhouse before I start dinner. Would you mind watching Ethan while I’m outside?»
«Not at all,» Shannon said quickly.
«Thank you,» Willow said, covering a yawn again. «I’ll hurry.»
«No need,» Shannon said. «I started the stew while you slept. If Ethan wakes up, I’ll hold him at bay with some cow’s milk from the well house.»
«You’re an angel.»
Shannon thought of what Whip had been saying to her and how she not only had listened, but had felt her bones turn to fire at his words. She had never wanted to feel a man’s body locked deep within her own until she met Whip.
Now she wanted nothing else.
«An angel?» Shannon asked with a bittersweet smile, looking with helpless hunger at Whip. «Hardly.»
But Willow had already vanished back into her bedroom. She reappeared a few moments later with a change of clothes in her hand.
«I won’t be long,» Willow repeated.
«Don’t rush,» Shannon said. «There’s nothing here that won’t keep for a while, including your son.»
Whip watched Willow leave, grateful that his sister was too sleepy and too hurried to notice the blunt ridge of his arousal thrusting against his trousers.
Thank God I’ve solved the problem of Shannon’s safety, Whip told himself savagely. I don’t think I can keep my hands off her any longer.
It’s time and past time to find a sunrise that is more beautiful than Shannon’s eyes when she looks at me.
«Don’t worry about your things,» Whip said abruptly to Shannon. «Cal or one of his men will help you fetch them when you go back for Prettyface. If you wait a week or two, that hardheaded son of a bitch will be able to walk on his own rather than being slung over your saddle.»
Shannon blinked and shook her head, feeling as if she had just awakened into someone else’s dream.
«What are you talking about?» she asked. «Even if we wait a fortnight to go back to my cabin, I don’t need any more clothes.»
What Shannon didn’t say was that there weren’t any more clothes at the cabin, whether or not she needed them.
«And why would I bring Prettyface here anyway?» she added, perplexed.
«I thought you’d want to keep him,» Whip said. «Cal and Willy say it’s fine with them. They’ve been trying to get a dog that was big enough and tough enough to survive the wolves and Texas longhorns and winter winds, but they haven’t had much luck.»
«Of course I’m going to keep Prettyface! What on earth are you talking about?»
«I’m talking about you coming here to help Willy out. She needs it and the two of you get along better than sisters and —»
«No.»
«— you can’t keep living in that goddamn rickety shack off in the back end of nowhere and we both know it!»
«No.»
«It’s not safe!» Whip said savagely. «You have to —»
«No.»
«— leave!»
«No.»
Whip reached for Shannon with stunning speed. Before she knew what had happened, she was jerked off her feet and brought to Whip’s eye level.
It wasn’t a comforting place to be. His eyes were pale, glittering, dilated with rage, the eyes of a trapped animal.
«Yes,» Whip snarled.
Shannon flinched but didn’t back down.
«No.»
The word was soft, final. The words that followed were equally soft, equally final.
«I have a right to live as I want to,» she said.
«Or die,» Whip shot back.
«Or die,» she agreed.
His hands tightened harshly on Shannon’s arms, but she didn’t protest. Whatever pain she felt was nothing compared to the anguished fury driving Whip.
«You’re trying to tie me down,» he said through his teeth. «You think I won’t leave until I know you’re safe.»
«No,» Shannon said quietly. «You’re trying to tiemedown and make me live the wayyouwant me to.»
«Damn it, you’re twisting my words!»
«Am I? I know you’ll leave me, Whip. I’ve known it from the first time I heard you talking about the sunrise you’ve never seen. ‘Nothing is more beautiful. Nothing is more compelling. ’»
«Shannon, honey girl, I —»
«No,» she whispered, stopping his words by brushing her lips just once over his. «I believed you then. I believe you now. You will leave. And I will stay in my cabin.»
«I won’t let you.»
«Yondering man, you can’t stop me.»
Whip closed his eyes. His mouth was flattened, his lips pale.
«You’re tearing me apart,» he said in an anguished whisper.
«I’m just —»
Whip talked over Shannon’s words, trying to make her understand.
«I want you. I want you like I’ve never wanted anything — except the sunrise I’ve never seen. I can have one or I can have the other. Do you know how it feels to be torn apart like that?» he demanded in despair and rage. «I would tear the soul out of my body if it meant an end to this pain!»
Tears burned behind Shannon’s eyes, gathered in her lashes, and slid hotly down her cheeks.
«I would do the same,» she whispered. «But you can have what you want most, Whip. Freedom. I’m not baiting any traps or building any cages with you in mind.»
«The hell you aren’t,» he said roughly. «I have to know you’re safe.»
«And I have to know I’m free! Like you, yondering man. Free as the sunrise.»
«You can’t be. It’s not the same for a woman.»
«Not for a married woman, no. But I’m not married.»
Whip opened his eyes and saw the tears in Shannon’s.
«Honey girl, don’t cry. I never meant to hurt you.»
«And I never meant to tear you apart,» Shannon whispered. «All I ever asked you to do was dig gold for me. Since that’s too much tying down for you to live with, just ride on and find that sunrise you hunger for so much. Ride on and leave me be.»
«I can’t,» he said simply. «Not until I know you’re safe.»
«You have to.»
«Shannon —»
«If you stay, you’ll hate me,» she interrupted starkly. «I’d rather die, Whip.»
«And that’s just what you’ll do if you go back to that damned shack!»
«My choice, Whip. Not yours.»
Slowly Whip lowered Shannon to the floor. Then he removed his hands from her arms, turned his back, and went out the front door without another word.
SHANNON looked over the dinner table, checking that everything was where it should be. Normally she wouldn’t have worried, but normally she wouldn’t be feeling used up and wrung out like an old rag. Already she had dropped a spoon, spilled coff
ee, and scorched her fingers adding wood to the fire.
«Thunderation,» she muttered, using one of Cherokee’s favorite phrases. «I forgot the plates.»
If Willow noticed Shannon’s unexpected clumsiness, nothing was said about it. But Willow had her hands full with Ethan at the moment. He was hollering from his crib, outraged that his mother wouldn’t let him polish his walking skills in the kitchen, careening from sink to table and back again, with a heart-stopping run at the wood stove in between.
«Blazes, but that boy is quick,» Willow said, coming back into the kitchen.
«He has Caleb’s speed,» Shannon agreed. «Along with his amber eyes. And a dimple at the corner of his smile that is just like Whip’s.»
Willow smiled. «If Ethan grows up one half as handsome as his daddy or his uncle, all the girls in Colorado Territory will beat a path to our door. How is the stew coming along?»
«It’s ready.»
«Good. I saw Caleb walking in from the barn when I put Ethan in his crib.»
«Was Whip with him?»
«No, but he won’t be far behind. In case you hadn’t noticed, my brother likes home cooking.»
Shannon ducked her head so that Willow couldn’t see the sudden gleam of tears.
What’s wrong with me?Shannon asked herself grimly. I know better than to cry. It’s a waste of salt and effort.
«I noticed,» Shannon said in a muffled voice. «So long as it isn’thishome, of course. Is the bread cool enough to slice yet?»
«Should be. Mark my words, though. Whip will complain that there aren’t any biscuits.»
«No, he won’t,» Caleb said, closing the kitchen door behind him. «He left a few hours ago.»
Shannon went very still.
«Left?» Willow asked, turning away from the stove. «Where did he go?»
«To see Reno.»
«Oh.» Willow frowned and went back to spooning stew into a big wooden serving bowl. «Odd that he didn’t say anything to me. That’s not like him.»
Caleb’s whiskey-colored eyes focused on the slender girl whose hair was the color of autumn.
«Did he say anything to you?» Caleb asked Shannon bluntly.
«No. But then, he’s a yondering man.»
«That doesn’t excuse bad manners,» Willow said. «I declare, for all the customs in all the countries of the world Whip has learned, he should know better.»
Caleb hadn’t stopped looking at Shannon. There was the same tension around her mouth, the same darkness in her eyes, that there had been in Whip’s. Caleb had spent several hours thinking about how Whip had looked, and whether anything should be said about it.
He had decided it should.
«I understand Whip did some digging on your gold claims,» Caleb said.
Shannon nodded.
«Any luck?» Caleb asked.
Willow shot him a surprised look. «Caleb, that’s none of our business.»
He turned toward her with startling swiftness. «Not usually, no. But this isn’t usual.»
Willow gave her husband a long look, said something under her breath, and went back to spooning stew.
«Any luck finding gold?» Caleb asked again, turning to Shannon once more.
«No. Whip said he lost the drift, whatever that is.»
Caleb grunted. «The drift is the direction the vein of gold takes in the bedrock. When you lose it, all you’re doing is hammering stone.»
«Whip did a lot of that. He came back every day covered in rock grit and sweat.»
«Did he? Why? He hates gold mining almost as much as I do, and he hates working for wages even worse.»
«Whip was worried about me,» Shannon said. «Winters are long in Echo Basin, and supplies in Holler Creek are very dear. He was worried that I wouldn’t have enough to eat unless the claims paid for it.»
«There’s always hunting,» Caleb said. Then he smiled slightly, remembering the story of the grizzly. «But you’re not much of a shot, are you?»
«Ammunition is too expensive to waste practicing,» Shannon said, «so I just have to sneak up on game and do the best I can.»
«I’m surprised Silent John didn’t make his own bullets. Most men like him do.»
«He did. But he never trusted me enough to teach me how. He was mighty particular about the weight of his bullets. He counted each grain of powder.»
«I’ll just bet he did,» Caleb said, thinking of Silent John’s reputation with a. 50-caliber buffalo gun. «Do you think he’s still alive?»
«No. But please don’t tell anyone.»
«Why?»
«I don’t want two-legged wolves howling around the cabin each time they get a skin full of rotgut,» Shannon said bluntly. «Silent John put the fear of God in the men around Echo Basin. I want it to stay that way.»
Caleb nodded, unsurprised. «What about Whip?»
«Whip?» Shannon asked. She smiled sadly. «He can howl around my cabin any time he takes the notion.»
Caleb laughed softly, even as he understood the pain in Shannon’s smile.
«Does Whip think Silent John is dead?» Caleb asked.
«Yes.»
«Then what’s the problem?»
«I beg your pardon?» Shannon asked.
«Why did Whip light out of here like his heels were on fire?»
«He wants me to stay with you and Willow.»
«So do we,» Willow said from the stove.
«I…thank you,» Shannon said. «But I can’t.»
«Can’t or won’t?» Caleb asked in a clipped voice.
«Caleb,» Willow said. «We have no right.»
«Did you see your brother when he rode out?» Caleb asked curtly.
«No.»
«I did. When someone you care about looks the way Whip did, you start asking questions. And you get answers.»
As Shannon looked at Caleb’s face, she remembered what Whip had once called him — a dark angel of vengeance who had followed a man for years to avenge the seduction, betrayal, and death of his sister. It reminded her of the man called Hunter, another dark angel moving over the face of the lawless land.
Shannon closed her eyes and laced her fingers together until they ached. When she opened her eyes, Caleb was watching her with both compassion and determination.
He knew his questions were painful for her. But he was going to have answers anyway, for Whip, too, was hurting.
«If I thought you didn’t care for Whip,» Caleb said calmly, «I wouldn’t have said a word about any of this to you. But I’ve seen you watching him. It’s the way Eve watches Reno, the way Jessi watches Wolfe, the —»
«— way Willow watches you,» Shannon finished for Caleb. «I’m sorry. I don’t have much practice at hiding my feelings.»
«There’s no need,» Willow said, putting the bowl of stew on the table. «You’re among friends, here. You know that, don’t you?»
Shannon nodded and tried to speak. Tears threatened to overflow her long, dark lashes.
Willow put her arms around Shannon and hugged her like a child.
«Then why can’t you stay with us?» Willow asked softly.
Shannon hugged Willow in return, took a deep, broken breath, and tried to make Whip’s sister understand.
«How would you feel,» Shannon asked, «if you loved Caleb and he wanted something more than he wanted you and he left you?»
Willow’s breath came in swiftly. She stepped back, wanting to see Shannon’s eyes. Then she wished she hadn’t.
«How would you feel,» Shannon said painfully, «if, after Caleb left, you lived in his sister’s house, saw Caleb in his sister’;s sun-bright hair and catlike eyes, saw Caleb in his sister’s child, a dimple in one corner of the baby’s smile…you saw all this and you knew every day, every breath, every heartbeat, that there would be no baby for you, no home, no mate to share your life?»
«I couldn’t bear it,» Willow said. «Loving Caleb, knowing he didn’t love me, being reminded of it everywhere I looked…. It would kill me.»
«Yes,» Shannon whispered.
She turned to Caleb, who was watching her with troubled eyes while his big hand stroked Willow’s hair in silent love.
«That’s why I can’t stay,» Shannon said to him.
«Is that what you told Whip?» he asked. «Is that why he looked like he had a knife in his guts?»
Shannon shook her head slowly, sending veils of autumn-colored hair sliding over her shoulders.
«No,» she said in a husky voice. «That’s not what I told him.»
«Why not?» Caleb asked.
«It would have been like asking him to stay…begging him. I won’t do that.»
«Too proud?»
Caleb’s voice was gentle but his eyes were the unflinching amber of a bird of prey.
He didn’t have all of his answers yet.
«Too practical,» Shannon corrected with a bittersweet smile. «Watching my mama and papa taught me how bad things can get when a man wants one thing and a woman wants another. He left and she took laudanum for the pain. For the first time, I understand why she did it. And I hope it worked.»
«Does that mean I have to lock up the laudanum?» Caleb asked dryly.
«No.»
«I didn’t think so. You’re tougher than your mama was, aren’t you?»
«I had to be. I took care of her at the end.»
«What did you tell Whip?» Caleb asked again.
«The other half of the truth. That I don’t want to be obliged to anyone, no matter how kind they are, for my bread and salt. I want to be free.»
«But you’re a —»
«Woman,» Shannon finished curtly. «Yes. I had noticed that very thing.»
«So does every other man who sees you walk by,» Caleb retorted.
«Caleb!» Willow said in exasperation. «Honestly!»
«Well, honey, it’s the truth, and all the talking about freedom and such won’t change the way Shannon walks.»
«I don’t do it on purpose,» Shannon said tightly.
«Hell’s fire, I know that,» Caleb said. «You’re no more a flirt or a tease than Willow is. That’s not the point. The point is that males are going to notice you’re female. The decent ones will strike up a conversation and come calling with candy in one hand, flowers in the other, and a gleam in their eye. If you aren’t interested, they’ll ride off and not come back. But not all men are decent.»
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