by Leela Ash
“Of course,” Betsy said.
Lyla sighed in relief. When Betsy said something, she meant it. She was the most loyal person that Lyla had ever met in her life, besides her grandfather.
“Thank you, Betsy. I owe you.”
“You really don’t,” Betsy said. “I’ll always be here for you, you know. You’ve been so good to me over the past couple of years.”
“I love you, Bets.”
Betsy was silent for a moment and Lyla felt a nervous butterfly in her stomach. It wasn’t really widely accepted for shifters to express or accept the expression of feelings, especially from anybody outside the pack. But it was clear Jonah had been close to inviting her closer to him, which was incredibly surprising. Just as surprising as it was when Betsy replied, “I love you too.”
For the first time since she had been told she was pregnant, Lyla felt like everything was going to be all right.
15.
“Oh cut it out,” Betsy was saying in the other room. Jonah’s ears perked up, hoping he would hear Lyla’s voice speaking to his sister, but he was shocked when he heard the deep voice of Douglas on the phone.
“You know it’s true,” Douglas was saying, his voice gentle and sweet; a quality that Jonah wouldn’t have believed his old friend was capable of. “It takes a special kind of woman…”
“Bets! I’m home!” Jonah called. If they kept talking, Jonah knew he wouldn’t be able to stop listening. But if Betsy knew he was there, she would be able to stop the conversation before he heard too much.
“I’ve got to go,” Betsy said quickly. “Jonah’s back.”
“Call again soon,” Douglas said.
“I will,” Betsy whispered.
“Welcome home,” Betsy said, coming down the stairs, attempting to hide just how flustered she felt, and Jonah looked at her as if for the first time. Betsy had never shown any interest in anyone before. She had always been painfully shy, almost to the point of being antisocial. But he had to admit, she and Douglas had always been pretty comfortable with each other. It was a natural progression that he had somehow completely missed. Maybe because he had been gone for three years.
“I have some bad news,” Jonah said. He had just gotten back from a brief meeting with the team and Gregors was adamant about sending them after the Serah Stone. They had pinpointed Thames and his cronies on the coast, about two hours away from Oak Mountain, where Nichols was from. “I have to go for a little while.”
Betsy’s face fell, and Jonah went to her quickly.
“But trust me,” he said. “It’s the last thing I want to do. And I will be back as soon as I can.”
“That’s not always really up to you, Jonah,” Betsy said quietly. “It’s not right for you to be here until your job is done, right?”
Jonah looked down at the ground and sighed. “I guess so.”
The truth was, he was dreading leaving more than he’d ever thought possible. Just knowing he would be leaving Lyla behind, and his childhood home after spending so much time away from it already… It was tearing him apart.
But it had already gotten him hurt once to be distracted by matters of the heart. How was he going to justify staying and risking the lives of everybody in Stonybrooke? It just wasn’t worth it. He had no choice. Betsy was more right than she would ever know. His job wouldn’t be done until she was safe.
“I’m so sorry, sis,” Jonah said. It was tearing him up inside. How would he be able to leave Lyla behind? His sister? It was just too unfair.
“It really isn’t your fault, Jonah,” Betsy said. He knew that if she were a human, she would probably be crying right about then. But Betsy was proud shifter stock. She would rather die than show her emotions on her face. At least the most negative of them. And yet, being her younger brother, Jonah had always been able to read her like a book. It was easy to tell how she felt, especially with her being such a kind and compassionate soul. Even the slightest of things could wound her deeply, whether she showed those wounds to anybody or not. And now, he was abandoning her.
“It isn’t really about fault, is it?” Jonah sighed. “It’s about responsibility.”
“I know. You have a responsibility to the SEALs. I would never dream of getting in the way of that.”
“You’d never be in the way, Bets,” Jonah growled, holding his sister by the shoulders and looking into her eyes. “You know, you’re the reason I protect this place. My reason to fight. I love you more than I’ll ever love anybody. You’re my sister. My first best friend. And trust me when I say that I will come back as soon as I possibly can. I will never leave you for that long again.”
Betsy gazed at him silently for a moment, appreciation radiating from her body. “When do you have to leave?” she finally asked.
“In the morning,” Jonah sighed. “But there’s something I have to take care of first.”
Betsy nodded and Jonah smiled. There was nothing more that he could do about the situation except hope to try to talk to Lyla. They were distracting enough when he was on the job that he nearly lost his life once. And he suspected they would continue to be distracting to him until he managed to sort out these inconvenient feelings once and for all.
***
“Jonah! What are you doing here?!”
Lyla’s mouth gaped open when she opened the door to her small bungalow.
“Betsy told me you have a leaky pipe. Thought I would take a look at it for you.”
He didn’t know why he had lied, or how the lie had slipped so easily off his tongue. Somehow, things between him and Lyla weren’t quite transparent. As much as he wanted her – and the wolf had already more than laid its claim – he still wasn’t quite sure where he stood with her. It was an unpleasant place to be.
“Oh,” Lyla said, stepping aside to let Jonah inside. “Come in.”
The house was refreshingly familiar, and memories of the night when they had come there together sprang to life in his mind. He wanted her more than he had ever wanted anybody in his life.
“Lyla,” he said, reaching for her arms.
Somehow, she avoided his grip and had slipped into the next room.
“I’ve been having trouble since I first moved in, but it only got worse with time.”
“Yeah,” Jonah said, trying his best not to feel brushed off. “That does tend to be how these things happen.”
“I didn’t know you were such a handyman.”
Lyla’s voice was muffled now, half of her body hidden by the open door of her refrigerator as she dug around and pulled out a bottle of water for herself.
“I just know my way around a house, that’s all,” Jonah said.
“Do you want anything?” Lyla asked.
Why was she being so casual about all of this? Surely, she had felt it too; that moment between them when the wolf had made his claim and she had surrendered to it; allowed herself to be his, and his fully. He hadn’t just imagined it. It had happened. What was going on?
“No, thanks,” Jonah said, avoiding her eyes and heading to the area where the pipes were obviously having the most trouble.
They were silent for a few moments as Jonah examined the pipes, the tension in the room so thick between them he was sure he would burst if they went another second without saying anything. When he turned around to face her, Jonah opened his mouth to speak.
Before he could, the wolf had taken over in an instant, and his hands were suddenly on her shoulders, his body pressed close against hers. He dipped his head down and sampled the sweetness of her lips, and Lyla gasped softly, surprised and aroused by the advance.
But soon, her hands were on his chest and she was pushing him away, walking toward the other room.
“Jonah, we need to talk,” she said miserably.
There was something he really didn’t like about the tone of her voice.
“What do you mean?” he asked. “What’s wrong?”
“Other than everything?” she mumbled.
“Lyla…”<
br />
“It’s just… whatever you’re feeling… you get that I can’t feel the same way about you, right?”
Jonah frowned. “I don’t know what you mean.”
“Well, this is just sex, right? We can’t be anything more than that. I can’t… I can’t love you, Jonah. It isn’t right.”
Jonah felt like he’d had the wind knocked out of him.
“You think I just want to be here for the sex?” he asked, surprised by how hurt he was by the implication. Why was she acting this way? He knew he had connected with her in a deep way reserved only for those who had mated for life. And sure, she wasn’t shifter enough to know these things, but still, the wolf had certain expectations.
Lyla swallowed hard, a dark flush creeping across her face.
“I can’t be with you Jonah. It just isn’t a good time. Don’t you get that?”
Jonah squared his jaw, the wolf suddenly baring its teeth at the woman it loved and turning its nose up at her.
“What I get is that I’m leaving, Lyla. I leave Stonybrooke tomorrow morning. I just thought that maybe we could…”
Lyla’s body responded to the suggestion, but her mouth was set in a firm line.
“I don’t owe anything to you, Jonah Lucas. You would be better off going off on your mission and forgetting about me, all right? This isn’t the time for us to be talking about this.”
There was something behind those ocean-colored eyes of hers. Something Lyla was hiding. What was it she wasn’t telling him?
“Please,” Jonah said, gripping her hand in his and staring deeply into her eyes.
But Lyla tore her eyes away and sighed, walking through the kitchen back to her living room and sitting heavily on the couch.
“I think you should leave,” Lyla said. Again, Jonah’s stomach did a flip-flop and he wondered what kind of alternate dimension he had wound up in. Lyla was his. Wasn’t she?
“All right. But I don’t know when I’m going to see you again,” he said to her, his eyes boring into hers. Again, he got that feeling that there was something wrong here. He just couldn’t put his finger on what it was.
“You’ll see me when you see me,” Lyla said, looking down at her hands. “Just go do what you have to do. Forget about all of this. You already know for yourself that it isn’t worth the trouble.”
She had him there. Jonah sighed, trying his best not to show the betrayal he felt on his face.
“If that’s how you really feel about it,” he said. “Then I’ll be on my way.”
Lyla said nothing, and Jonah waited for a moment longer, hoping beyond hope that maybe she would say something to change his mind and convince him to stay. But her begging wasn’t forthcoming, and Jonah sighed, turning his back on Lyla to head back home.
16.
As soon as Jonah was out the door, Lyla burst into tears. She had wanted so badly to tell him she was pregnant. To beg him to stay, to abandon such a dangerous mission; a mission that could leave their child without a father, her best friend completely and utterly family-less.
She just didn’t have it in her to confess the truth to him. How could she ever live with herself, knowing what a damn coward she was? Lyla’s tears didn’t seem to have an end. All she wanted to do was call Jonah back to her; to feel his strong arms around her body once again; his warm lips starting fires in places where only he could put them out. But she had all but driven him away. And who knew if he would ever come back again?
It was better than the alternative, though, wasn’t it? A man like Jonah had a job to do. People to care for and protect. She couldn’t let herself be selfish enough to distract him from that single, lofty goal. It seemed to be the defining factor of his personality; Jonah, the strong and brave. The protector of all. Jonah, her hero.
Lyla puttered to the kitchen, where the leaking pipe had left a puddle on the floor near where Jonah had been standing. She could still smell him in the room with her, and kicked at the faulty pipe. The little bungalow had been a terrible investment. She had to get out of there. Right that moment. Nothing could keep her in Stonybrooke now. She had all she needed of her grandfather in her memories. Returning had been a mistake.
“Are you absolutely sure about this?” her realtor asked a few moments later.
“I’ve never been more sure of anything in my life,” Lyla said, looking down at her abdomen and stroking it gently for the first time since she’d found out she was with child. “I need a change.”
“All right,” the realtor said. “Let’s get this rolling then.”
Within twenty minutes, her bungalow was on the market, and Lyla was packing the most important things she owned into a few small boxes and carrying them to her car; the car that was still dented by the bear shifter that had attacked her for no apparent reason. At least the windshield was repaired. It wasn’t safe for her in Stonybrooke, and it certainly wouldn’t be safe for her baby. It was time to make a clean break, whether she liked it or not. Sometimes, the best course of action to take was the hardest.
Without any further hesitation, Lyla climbed into the driver’s seat of her car and turned the engine. She didn’t know exactly where she was going. All she knew was that anywhere would be better than being a sitting duck and a liability to the man she loved. And nothing would ever change her mind about that.
***
“Miss Winston, maybe you should sit down…”
Lyla scowled. The hormones had really been getting to her lately. Her stomach had blossomed in the time she had been pregnant.
Nobody had warned her about just how rapidly the pregnancy would proceed, and in a way she was sad that it had already gone by so quickly… even if that meant having mood swings over well-meaning people offering her a seat.
“I’m fine standing,” Lyla said curtly. “I’m uncomfortable either way. At least on my feet the baby isn’t on my bladder.”
“If you say so.”
Ken, her new landlord, a tall, skinny young man, and his wife were constantly checking in on Lyla to make sure she was all right. They seemed to understand that hers was not the typical pregnancy seen in the mountains; she had nothing to do with either the bears or the other humans in the area. In fact, Lyla was beginning to suspect that one of them, probably Mrs. Nelson, her landlord’s wife, was part wolf shifter herself.
“The missus told me to bring you this,” Mr. Nelson said, offering Lyla a brown paper bag. “She knows what this time in a pregnancy like yourscan be like. Her mother was a midwife.”
Lyla nodded and took the bag. “Thank you, Ken.”
“She left you a note in there about how to use that stuff,” Ken continued, not acknowledging Lyla’s gratitude. Maybe he was part shifter himself. It was sometimes hard for her to tell. “Too much can be bad for the baby. But if you use it right, you can tell the difference immediately. ‘Specially with the little booger on your bladder like that.”
Lyla smiled, her irritation giving way to a deep feeling of appreciation for Ken and his wife. They had taken her in without question, allowing her to pay in cash. She had left the bungalow quickly, and had changed her cell phone number so that nobody, not even Betsy, would be able to contact her. It had been the hardest timeof her life, waiting for the bungalow to sell and not having anyone near her. She had abandoned her best friend and lost the man she loved. She was alone, destined to be a single mother for the rest of her life. And as difficult as it was, it was worth it to protect Jonah, and their child.
After Ken left, Lyla opened the brown paper bag and smiled to herself. It was an herbal mix; something she was positive her grandfather had told her would aid in the pregnancy and birth of wolf shifter pups. When she smelled it, she was taken back to the small, comfortable den where they had spent many an evening chatting and exchanging stories in her youth. The baby kicked and Lyla smiled. If it was a boy, she would name it after her grandfather. He had told her so much about Stonybrooke that it had immediately felt like home.
The thought sent a jolt of
pain through her. That was a feeling that had been short-lived. She would have done anything to take it all back; to resist Jonah’s tempting arms and the seduction of his handsome smile. But the truth was, he was everything she had ever wanted in a man, and if things were different, she could have spent the rest of her life happy with him.
She felt a twinge of nausea when she considered the possibility of returning to Stonybrooke. Jonah would never forgive her for running away; for keeping such a huge secret from him. The baby was already almost born and he wasn’t there. It was unforgivable. He would probably never look at her the same way again. She would be lucky if he didn’t kill her on sight, really.
And Betsy… she had abandoned her best friend just at the same time as her brother was being deployed. Betsy, who had known she was pregnant; who was keeping her secret. Betsy, who would have done anything for anybody. Lyla felt like the scum of the Earth for what she had done. But had she had any choice? She’d had to protect her child, her lover, and even her own life. It was the hardest thing she had ever done, but she hadn’t had a choice.
The pup kicked again and Lyla sighed.
“It’s just you and me now, little guy,” she whispered down to her stomach.
Another kick, and then the baby she had conceived with Jonah was still.
17.
“All right, boys,” Jonah said, sweat pouring down his face. A sudden heat wave had struck at just the wrong time, and the sea was starting to rock ominously beneath the destroyer. The crew was scattering about, preparing for an unexpected storm as Nichols, from the shoreline, scoped out the area on the beach where the ceremony was going to be held.
They had been undercover for months, searching for the location of the Serah stone and putting Nichols in the midst of Thames and his crew as they began to plan a hostile takeover of Stonybrooke. It was just as they had suspected – the bears had been planning a ceremony to invoke the stone’s ancient power so the hybrids hiding in Stonybrooke would have the strength to destroy the entire community – and tonight was the night when the fight was really going to count.
