by Coffee
Now confronted with whether she’d make real of her malicious intent, she found she didn’t have it in her.
“Minnie?” Kawanna was shocked to see her after having gone so many months without crossing her path. “I don’t want any trouble with you.”
Minnie didn’t respond. She didn’t know how to. She just reached for her item and closed the door, heading for the checkout line.
After paying for her grocery item, Minnie realized she did know what to say to Kawanna and she set out to find her in the store. She spotted her pushing her shopping cart, minding her business.
“Kawanna.” She turned around. “I have something I want to say to you.”
Kawanna felt she owed it to her to listen but she hoped whatever harsh words spilled from her lips this time didn’t end up in a brawl in aisle nine.
“There were two things I told you would never happen when we last saw each other and it turns out I lied about one of them. When I said we will never be friends again that was Bible but when I said I would never forgive you, that wasn’t true. Truth is I forgave you much faster than I forgave myself. I just thought you should know.”
Kawanna breathed a breath of relief. She hoped for a moment like this but with the way she devastated Minnie, she wasn’t sure if this day would ever come.
“There’s nothing I can say to justify my actions and an apology doesn’t seem sufficient but I am very sorry. I was damaged and in turn, I ruined a great friendship and your faith in your husband.”
“Ex-husband but like I said it’s okay. Matter of fact, I should be thanking you.”
“Thanking me? Why?”
“Discovering he was cheating with random women was painful but I probably would have forgiven him and stayed, knowing me. But if it wasn’t for the level of betrayal I felt from you, I wouldn’t be where I am now, which is where I should have always been. So, yes, thank you.”
“I wish I could have opened your eyes much differently but you’re welcome.”
Kawanna looked a little uneasy as they stood there so in the spirit of allowing bygone to be bygones, Minnie opened the floor for mild conversation. “So, do you live in this area now?”
“Yes. Yes, I do. I couldn’t stay where I was. I didn’t feel comfortable there.” She thought of how G’Corey had her too frightened to be at her own apartment. “But I also work in this area as well.”
“Oh? Where are you working?”
“Well, I don’t actually work. I volunteer at Sweet Haven’s Women’s Center. See, I started seeing a counselor over a year ago and she inspired me to help others, so I help oversee the Break Every Chain program.”
“That sounds interesting.”
“It is. I’m actually here because some of those ladies are in hiding from their abusers, so I do their personal shopping for toiletries and other needs until they are free to live again without having to look over their shoulders.”
In that moment, Minnie kind of wanted to open up about how she felt paranoid about G’Corey but she didn’t want to welcome her back into her life on such a personal level again.
“Well, I have somewhere to be as do you. Keep up the good work and take care of yourself.”
Kawanna reached into her back pocket and pulled out a business card. “Hey, you’ll probably never call, but if you ever need me for anything, I’m available to you.”
She wasn’t sure how Minnie would feel about physical contact but she was compelled to give her a hug. Minnie was caught off guard by it, but she returned the gesture.
Tears fell from Kawanna’s eyes as she embraced her. She wasn’t going to fool herself into thinking this was the start of something new but she was relieved to finally begin letting go of the burden she’d been carrying around for such a long time.
They separated and Kawanna returned to her buggy. She looked over her shoulder to see Minnie still standing there. She waved her bye, unsure if she’d ever see her again, but hoping that she would.
As she turned the corner aisle, Minnie exhaled deeply and looked at the card.
It was good seeing you, Kawanna.
Minnie never thought she’d think that after their last encounter but time had a way of healing all wounds.
Thirty minutes later, Minnie was at Samiyah’s house. She brought all of the bags to her porch before ringing the doorbell.
Samiyah opened up and the first thing she attempted to do was reach for some of the groceries.
“Don’t you dare. You can barely carry that beach ball in front of you. Go sit down somewhere,” Minnie mothered.
“I’m not helpless, no.”
“I know that, but I got this. Now go on.”
Minnie made the necessary trips to bring all of the bags inside and then sat down on the sofa once she was done putting them away.
“You look tired. You want something to drink?” Samiyah was seconds from peeling herself off of the couch to grab her a cold drink.
“I’ll get it myself. Where’s nanny’s baby?” Minnie looked around.
“Upstairs sleep. Thank God. She is busy bee. I don’t know how I’m gonna do it with her and a newborn.”
“You’re going to do fine and I will take Lil’ Acacia off of your hands when Eli doesn’t have her. Speaking of Eli, how is he?”
“He’s Eli. Excellent father and a great man—to me.”
“What do you mean you? Are y’all together now?”
“No, we’re not together but he’s been taking care of me like we were. Just yesterday he spoiled me like I was his lady and cooked me a hellafied dinner.”
“What his famous tacos.” Minnie chuckled.
“No. He been surpassed that. Every week he’d been experimenting and making new dishes for me to try since I haven’t been in a mood to cook for myself. He actually throws down. I’m talking about butterflied stuffed pork chops, red beans and fried chicken that taste like Popeye’s, anything that comes to mind, he whips. I mean some of it needs tweaking but for the most part, that shit be so good. That’s probably why I’m spreading so damn much.” Samiyah looked at her round belly and even thicker thighs.
“Okay so what about Blu and Gerran?”
“Well, I told him that he has to be fair to Blu by giving her the respect she deserves. It’s clear we love each other but it’s too complicated for us to be anything other than friends and co-parents. And Gerran? It’s still fuck him.”
“He hasn’t tried coming around or anything?” Minnie was saddened by his hardened heart.
“Not at all. When I tell you he ain’t concerned about me and my house, I’m talking truth. He doesn’t check on Lil’ Acacia, which I’m not mad about, but he doesn’t even inquire about the one I’m carrying, that is his. So the best way to sum up me and Gerran is—it’s a fucked up situation that ain’t gon’ get right no time soon.”
“That’s so sad to hear. I thought he was better than that.”
“I thought so too, but I don’t want to talk about me or him. My shit is depressing as hell. And I’m tired of going through the motions over it, so tell me something good. What’s going on with you and hubs?”
“We are on a cloud. I mean my imagination couldn’t fathom the type of love this man gives me. But not all is well in paradise.”
“What do you mean? Yuri is one of the good guys, right?”
“He’s too good to be true but what I’m talking about is this,” she paused as she looked around her living room, “where is your laptop?”
“It’s in the den.” Samiyah pointed.
“Be right back.” Minnie got up and headed off into the other room, so she could show her what she was talking about instead. When she reentered the living room, she placed the computer on her lap. “Log into my email account. It’s [email protected] and my password is blackbutterfly0714. Read the messages from theonly14u.”
Samiyah did as she asked and began reading.
Minnie,
I didn’t mean for that to happen that day. I only meant to scare h
im off. Nothing more. I know you don’t know if you can believe me because of what you witnessed but you know me better than anybody so you should know soul deep that I’m not the man you saw that day. I was just crazy in love but I can promise you if you give me another chance, I will spend my life making it right.
Don’t you remember you told me that you would never leave me? That you would be my forever mine? Well, you’re not here and now that you’re gone nothing feels the same. I just want to get back to that loving feeling. Don’t you miss that? How we would curl up in bed and make love, fall asleep and make love again. I want that. I need that. So, I’m prepared to earn you again but know that I want you and I’ll stop at nothing to have you.
We made a commitment that I’m gonna see all the way through. I love you now and I always will.
Love,
Your one and only
Samiyah read a few more messages but couldn’t stomach reading the other pages worth of his bullshit. “G’Corey is a fuckin’ retarded joke! I hate him. He has some damn nerve. Are you going to show your husband?”
“I don’t know. I haven’t decided yet.”
“And why the hell not? He should know?”
“I know that but I can’t be responsible for something deadly happening to my husband because I sent him on a chase, looking for my ex when maybe he’s just talking. I mean I haven’t seen G’Corey and neither has he so I’m wondering if this is even worth mentioning.”
“I say yes! What happens if he tries something, Minnie?”
“Like I said, I don’t know what I’m gonna do. All I know is I almost lost my husband once and I am not eager to put him in harm’s way looking for G’Corey if all these are just letters confessing a love that will never be returned.”
“I don’t think that’s a good idea but if this ever escalated beyond emails, will you tell Yuriah? Will you tell me?”
“I pray to God it doesn’t but I most definitely would say something then and that’s if I don’t say something now.”
“Good because you don’t know where his head is and I already lost Acacia. I can’t lose you, too.”
Minnie stared at Samiyah in wonderment. She didn’t consider G’Corey setting out to do her personal harm but now she had something to think about.
Chapter 26
One month later…
Samiyah knocked on Elias’ door. She needed to drop Lil’ Acacia off to him while she went to her 20 week check-up with her OB/GYN.
“You’re ready to see Da-da? Sure you are.” She looked down at her baby.
Blu answered the door, taking Peaches off of her hands as she let them inside. “Hey, Samiyah. How are you?”
“Miserably fat and I’m only halfway through this.” She shook her head.
“That just means he or she is eating good.” Blu looked behind herself and pointed. “Eli’s in the shower, but you can wait for him.”
Samiyah looked at her watch. She had a few minutes before she had to leave for her appointment, so she sat down.
The ladies shared light conversation, something that had been hard to do since finding out Samiyah’s baby was Eli’s. Not certain if the timing was right, but Samiyah wanted to share something with Blu that had been weighing on her.
“I want to change the subject a little bit and address the elephant in the room. I know accepting the change my daughter brought into your relationship and even coming to terms with the line he and I crossed had been trying for you. So, I wanted you to hear from me that you have a good man who happens to be a great father as well as my friend but that’s all he is to me, my friend.” She sliced her hand in the air.
Blu was taken by surprise but she couldn’t deny that it made her feel good to hear those words coming from her. “I appreciate you saying that but may I ask why’d you feel the need?”
“We are amicable with each other but at one point we were friends outside of Eli. So, I know you’re uncomfortable when I come around and I want there to be good vibes between us for our baby’s sake. After all, she’ll grow up seeing you as a mother-figure and I would like for us to be more than cordial, if possible.”
Blu wasn’t going to divulge to her that she had been experiencing four levels of insecurities when it came to her, that’s what Kanari was for. But it would help to create a better environment for Peaches if she was able to move past her trust issues that got in the way of not only their relationship but the one with Eli.
Blu looked over at Peaches who was gnawing on a chew toy and smiled. “It’s possible.”
Samiyah smiled and then realized she had to be going. She stood up slowly. “Look, tell Eli I will be back to pick her up after my visit, please. Ummm, I’ve pumped more than enough milk to last her. And—”
“And we’ve been doing this for a while. We got it.” Blu reminded her that this wasn’t there first baby rodeo with her.
“You’re right. Well, it was good talking with you.” Samiyah headed for the door.
Blu walked up behind her. “Give me a hug.”
“Awww.” Samiyah turned around to hug her.
“It was good talking with you, too.” Blu expressed genuinely.
***
Twenty-five minutes later, Samiyah sat in the examination room as she waited on her doctor to come in. She had been up and down about her pregnancy but today she was riding a high because if the baby cooperated, she would know what to plan for.
Moments later, the door opened.
“Good morning, mom. How are we doing today and where is your little sunshine?” Her always jovial doctor gave her a hug.
Samiyah rubbed her belly. We’re fine and she’s with her daddy.”
“Oh. Well, if you’re up to it, bring her on your next visit. My office just adores her.”
“I will.” Samiyah smiled.
She then pointed to the scale. “Okay, now let me check your weight.”
Samiyah stepped on and stood still as she watched the doctor’s fingers slide the nodule from left to right until the beam was balanced. She looked in her chart at her previous weight and again at her current weigh in.
“Oh, my. You’ve gained thirteen pounds from your last visit. Has anything changed in your diet?”
“No, I try to eat three times but it’s all normal portions. Is there something wrong?”
“It’s abnormal but let’s not be quick to worry. Get on the table for me. I am going to perform a sonogram.”
“Okay.” Samiyah climbed on the table and laid back lifting her shirt. She jumped at the cold application of jelly that was squirted onto her stomach before the doctor maneuvered the device on top of it.
She pulled the baby up on the screen. She made grunts as she examined the monitor. “Umm. Hmmm. Okay. Everything looks normal. So, would you like to know what you’re having?”
“I’m guessing another girl. Am I right?”
“You are. It’s a girl.” The doctor beamed.
Samiyah smiled.
“Andddd it’s a boy.”
Samiyah frowned. “Excuse me. Which one? Girl or boy?”
“Both. You’re having twins, Samiyah. A boy and a girl.”
“What?” Samiyah was shocked as she tried to make sense of what was being told to her.
“You’re having twins. You picked up so much weight because there’s another baby in there.”
“What?” Samiyah still couldn’t process what she was hearing.
“I take it you’re surprised. Well, it looks like baby B was hiding behind baby A when we did your very first ultrasound and there was no way to know up until now. Are you excited?”
Samiyah’s lips curved downward and tears sat on her eyelashes, threatening to leap onto her face. Unable to conjure other words, all she could say was, “What?”
In the parking lot of her OB’s office…
“What? Two more babies? This is unreal. I can’t believe it. Three children, Yah. You’re blessed.” Minnie shrilled so loudly into the phone that Samiyah had to pull the rec
eiver away from her ear.
“Unreal is right but I don’t call raising children without their father a blessing.”
Minnie brought it down a notch and saw it through her eyes. “I understand. Well, are you going to tell Gerran that you all are having twins?”
“Why should I? All he does is stress me out. Every time we talk, he assassinates my character. How can we be parents to these babies—Oh, God! Babies?” Samiyah began crying so hard she couldn’t finish talking.
Minnie didn’t say anything because she knew she needed to let it out.
Samiyah stopped crying long enough to continue. “How can we be parents and we can’t even get along? He has no respect for me and as much as I want my children to grow up with him, I can’t, in good conscious, allow them to see their mama be mishandled by their father.”
“You’re right. He can’t allow his hurt and anger to infect y’all’s babies. But you can’t allow your feelings to stop him from being there, either. Y’all really have to work this out and you have four more months, if that, to do it. They’re coming, Yah, and they deserve you both. Plus, you shouldn’t do this alone. Call him and tell him..”
Samiyah agreed with her instantly. It was Gerran’s choice whether he wanted to be with her but it wasn’t an option not to be there for their children and she wasn’t going to give him the easy way out by condoning his isolated behavior.
“I’m going to call him.”
“When?”
“Now. I gonna let him know that we can have a paternity test done as soon as they’re born and we don’t have to fuck with each other unless it’s about them, if that’s the game he wants to play. Matter of fact, we can get a fuckin’ divorce because I can’t stay married to a man who can abandon ship when the waters get rough.”
“You’re serious? You don’t want to see if this can be salvaged? Y’all have too much history, though.”
“History means nothing when you don’t have a future. So I’m super serious. I mean, what am I holding on for? He been showing his hand for four straight months and now I need to put mine on the table.”
