Hope Falls_Seasons of Change

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by Kimi Flores


  He leaned back on the couch and glanced at me through the kitchen entryway. I was taken aback by how handsome he was. Of course, I knew he was attractive and definitely my type, but there was just something about the way the light from the flames emphasized his features.

  “Whatcha got in there?” He stood up and made his way toward me.

  I ticked them off on my fingers. “Pecan, fudge-brownie, pumpkin, apple and angel food cake, plus Christmas cookies.”

  I felt the warmth of his body as he stepped closer to my side. His scent filled my senses, seducing my mind into entertaining ideas that I’d put away long ago in order to focus on my career. I felt myself being drawn in by his heat, my body craving to be near him.

  His deep voice sent vibrations through me. “Well, that fudge-brownie is probably from Mrs. Rivers and the best tasting thing here, but please don’t tell Mrs. Samson I said that. Those two have had a rivalry forever and we are lucky enough to live just down the street from both of them.”

  I shook my finger gently toward him. “You know, I do believe you are correct. That makes so much sense now. The second I opened the door for Mrs. Rivers, I could see Mrs. Samson practically sprinting toward us with the tray.”

  He let out a hearty laugh. “Doesn't surprise me, but heads up—those cookies are probably hard as hell and I wouldn’t be surprised if they’re from last year. Mrs. Samson is not a baker, but she tries to keep up and dumps, usually expired, store bought products on plates and claims them as her own.”

  Puckering my lips as I stared down at the desserts, I contemplated which one to choose. “How about the angel food cake? That should be good with hot chocolate.” I looked up and caught Elliott staring at my mouth. His eyes met mine and he took a step back.

  Clearing his throat, he said, “Uh, yeah that sounds good.”

  I handed him two mugs and began to slice and plate the cake. Unscrewing the thermos cap, he poured the chocolatey goodness in, then dropped a few marshmallows in each cup.

  Plates and mugs in hand, we made our way back in front of the fire and plopped down on the couch.

  Elliott looked around the candlelit room and asked, “No TV?”

  I picked up the cup and took a sip. The flavor was heavenly and I had to take a moment before responding. “It’s set up in my office. I wanted this room to be free from electronic distractions.” I cringed, still not comfortable with having to receive any help, but I tried to keep in mind what Cass had said about Elliott truly enjoying lending a hand. “By the way, I hope you don’t mind that I still have your extension cords. One’s hooked up to my computer, TV and cell phone charger in the office, and the other to the fridge and that lamp in the kitchen.”

  “No problem at all.” He scanned the room as he took a bite, and I could practically feel his concern when his worry lines grew deeper. “But when will you have electricity?”

  Swallowing hard, I admitted, “The guy called today to reschedule, but his next available slot isn’t for a week. The seller already paid him, per our contract, but I had to get out of my townhouse so I moved in before he made the repairs. He doesn’t seem to feel an urgency to fix it. I really do wish the agent had your app before we closed escrow.” Which reminded me. “Hey, can you find me someone in town through your app? I’ll pay for it and work the money stuff out with the seller later. I really don’t want to take the risk of turning the old one on.”

  “What’s another visit from the fire department?” he teased as he took another bite of his cake.

  “I’m not going to live that down, am I?” I poked my fork into my dessert before putting it down on the table and picking up my mug.

  He chuckled. “Probably not.” I watched as his tongue darted out and swept back and forth in search for the crumb that had landed on the corner of his mouth.

  With quick breaths, I diverted my eyes and slapped the top of my thigh. “Can you believe a couple firemen came back today to bring me an extinguisher with a big bow on it? They seemed to be lighthearted about it and said it was their welcome to town gift.”

  He let out a deep laugh, allowing it to shake his entire body. “That sounds like something they’d do.” Swiping his hand over his mouth and chin, he dusted off any remaining crumbs. “Okay, in all seriousness,” he placed his plate on the table and stared at me, “I can take care of the electric box for you.”

  “Are you listed on your own app?” I said in a playful tone, but wondered if he was serious. Was he qualified to do a job like that?

  Placing his palm on my leg, he added, “Before Gus passed, I ordered a new one and was ready to install it when he ended up in the hospital. With everything going on, I never got the chance.” I caught a quick flash of regret pass over his expression when he looked toward the fire. “With the house going on the market so quickly after his death, I figured once I secured the sale, I’d install it.” He shrugged. “But now, if you would allow me to, I can do it for you.” His voice rang with hope that I wouldn't fight him on this, like I’d done with almost everything else up to this point.

  I glanced at his hand on my thigh and gulped down a mouthful of hot chocolate. With an impish smile, he pulled his hand away. My suspicious mind had to know if he really could replace the box without electrocuting himself or burning my house down. “Where did you learn how to install them?”

  Clasping his hands and letting them rest between his spread knees, his thumb slid back and forth over the calloused knuckles. “Before I got into real estate, then flipping houses, I worked for my father-in-law’s construction business. He taught me everything he knew.” He snickered while shaking his head. “Told me he may as well teach the son-of-a-bitch who’d gotten his seventeen-year-old daughter pregnant so I’d be able to support her and the baby.”

  I choked on the sudden reflexive gasp I’d just made and tried to catch my breath. “Seventeen?”

  “Yeah,” he sighed. “The summer before our senior year of high school.” I could only imagine what my face looked like because he leaned in and said, “It’s okay, everyone reacts that way.”

  “Wow, that must’ve been tough.” The dots quickly connected and I realized we were discussing Cass, the beautiful young woman who I had hoped to become friends with.

  “It was, but we managed.” He began rubbing the back of his neck, causing his shirt to tighten across his chest, giving me a moment to appreciate the muscles that came from hard work. “Amanda and I have known each other our entire lives. We grew up next door to each other. You know, the typical running around naked, chasing the hose in the front yard when we were little, then started dating as freshman in high school.”

  “Let me guess, football star and head cheerleader?” There was no way to hide my annoyance. I guess I still held some bitterness for the old stereotypes I’d had to deal with in high school. Their sense of entitlement due to the status they held in school was enough to make me want to puke.

  “Nope,” he chuckled. “Marching band geeks. She played the clarinet and I played the snare drums. The only time we were ever on the football field was during half-time.” He actually sounded proud to be a geek, causing me to let out a sigh of relief.

  “So, are the sordid rumors true about band camp?” I leaned forward as if he was about to give me the answers to a long, enduring mystery I had pondered for years. Man, I fit perfectly in this gossip-filled town.

  He busted up laughing. “Yeah, that was kind of a joke between us. A couple of dumb teenagers fooling around in the woods at night don’t usually plan ahead. So yes, this one time at band camp, I knocked up my girlfriend.”

  Without warning, our individual laughs filled the room, blending together in perfect harmony. I didn’t want to tarnish this feeling by asking more questions about his first love, but at the same time, she’d been a big part of his life and I wanted to know every detail about him.

  My eyes drifted to his strong forearms and I wondered out loud, “Do you still play?”

  “Unfortunately for you, yes
I do.” He cracked his knuckles and drew his mouth into a reassuring grin. “But the garage is insulated so you really can’t hear it much.”

  “I’d love to watch you play sometime.” And I really would, but the sudden excitement that overtook his expression melted my heart. It had been a very long time since I’d been able to please someone this much with one simple request.

  “That can be arranged, especially if you’ll let me switch out that electric box for you tomorrow morning.”

  I was aware he’d just used the same manipulation tactics that men in the office had perfected. But I couldn't get angry or defensive with him, because I knew his intentions weren’t malicious. He wasn’t trying to prove I was unqualified to find a resolution. He was a man of honor, who lived to be useful to anyone who needed help. There was no need to feel guilty or weak in accepting his offer. Regardless of what I now knew about him, I still had a difficult time letting go of my control, but who better to do the job? Plus, it was either let Elliott do it or sit in the dark, with my fridge attached to his extension cord for god only knew how long. “Fine, but only if you’ll let me pay you.”

  He gave his head one hard shake. “Nope. Sorry. This was something I wanted to do for Gus and a small part of my making sure the house is taken care of in his memory.”

  I let his words linger in the air as my thoughts tried to come up with a counter offer. There was no way I could deny him now, but I’d find a way to pay him back whether he wanted me to or not.

  Conceding, I gave a quick nod. “Okay then.”

  Nudging my knee with his, he asked, “So, what really brings you to Hope Falls?”

  Raising my cup to my lips, I stared at him over the rim, contemplating how much to share. I didn’t have a juicy story like his and seeing as he’d opened up to me, I didn't see any harm in telling him the truth.

  “I was laid off from the job I’d had since I graduated college, and there was nothing left for me back home, so I decided to relocate.”

  He raised an eyebrow and an unmistakable air of sympathy showed in his eyes. “No family?”

  “My sister lives with her husband and kids in the suburbs near Tampa where we grew up, and my dad and his girlfriend live about five miles from them. My mother passed away from a brain aneurysm a few months after our last visit to Hope Falls.”

  His hand gently covered my cheek, unsettling my thoughts for a moment. I struggled to not pull away. “I’m so sorry you’ve had to suffer like that.” His smooth voice soothed the heaviness in my chest.

  “It was tough when it happened, then shortly after, my sister got into a really bad accident, but we’re all okay now.” I really hoped he would leave it at that and not ask me to dig deeper. I tried to keep those emotions tucked away until I was ready to deal with them, and tonight was not that time.

  Luckily, he seemed to have gotten the message and nodded in a way that acknowledged my pain and loss, while respecting my privacy. He could’ve easily used my vulnerability at this moment to have his way, but he didn’t. He treated me as someone he cared about and wanted to support, like he’d done with Gus.

  “What did you do at your job?”

  “I was the human resource director. Worked my way up over the years, then the owner decided to retire. Gave the business to his son, who turned around and sold it to another company who already had their own human resource department, so guess where that left me?” I couldn’t believe how bitter I still felt over my dismissal. It was going to take time for me to finally move on. Just like in a marriage, I had given my best years to that company. Besides financial stability, for a while at least, I had nothing in my life that reflected those lost years.

  “Oh man, that’s too bad.”

  “Tell me about it. I was a bit of a workaholic and threw myself into my job, and for what?” I shook my head, surprised that I was sharing everything I’d just been thinking. “The few friends I had were coworkers and they’re all married with their own families. Even though we worked at the same place, they never understood why my job was so important to me. And they definitely don’t understand how lost I am without it.” I laid my head back on the couch and turned to see Elliott. I sounded like such a whiner. I kept telling myself it was just a job, but as pitiful as it sounded, it had been my everything.

  He held my face between his strong, work-worn hands, making sure I could see the sincerity in his eyes. “There’s no shame in losing your job for that reason. I’m sure you’ll find exactly what you’re looking for, and who knows, maybe it’s something surprising that you haven't even considered.”

  I knew he was referring to my career, but it almost sounded like he meant something else entirely. He dropped his hands and settled further into the couch, pulling his knee up to the cushion.

  I mirrored his position and continued to openly share my thoughts. “One thing is for sure, I definitely don’t want to work for someone else who has the power to take everything I’ve worked so hard for away from me. Not sure what my next venture is, but it won’t be that.” I never expected to be in this position at my age. “God, I sound pathetic, don't I? Here I am, thirty-nine and don’t have a damn clue what I’m going to do with my life. I’ve always had a plan. I never imagined I’d be in the middle of a midlife crisis.”

  “Oh believe me, this isn't a mid-life crisis.” His eyes widened as he shook his head. “I’ve seen one of those and it’s nothing like this. You’re just moving into a new chapter in your life. That’s normal. Remember that old saying, you can’t move forward in your story if you keep rereading the last chapter.”

  I teased, “So you had one, huh? Is that why you live here instead of the big city where you have better access to the real estate market?”

  He went quiet as his focus turned back toward the flames that were beginning to die out. “No, actually, my ex-wife had one and left me.”

  Shock paralyzed me for a moment. That was the last thing I expected him to say. “I’m so sorry. I had no idea.” I regretted not being more accustomed to social situations, because I was positive there had to be something better to say than that.

  “It’s okay.” I saw acceptance mixed with a bit of lingering pain in his eyes as he continued. “Happened several years ago and we’re at a good place now.”

  A good place? Did that mean they reconciled? I kept quiet to see if he’d share more.

  After a moment, and a breath, he went on. “Right before our youngest daughter graduated from high school, Amanda and I were already on shaky ground. She was restless, hanging out with old friends from high school, comparing their lives to ours. Then one day she told me she wanted a divorce. Said that her original plans had not been fulfilled and her life had always been tied to me. She never had the opportunity to dream about all the silly things young girls dreamed about, like which celebrity crush they would someday marry.”

  I gulped. So that’s why he shut down at dinner last night. I’d hit a nerve when I shared my teen fantasy.

  He positioned himself so he could lean back more while stretching his legs out before him, he locked his fingers behind his head and stared off into space. “She said she never blamed me for holding her back and that she knew our responsibility to our family outweighed everything else, but now that Lizbeth would be going off to college, there was no reason for us to stay together.”

  I wanted to move closer, wrap him in my arms and tell him it would be okay, but it was already okay. This was his past and I’d seen how he lived his present to the fullest with his daughter. But I’d never be convinced he didn’t still carry the scars of being discarded. Even with the heavy wave of wanting to comfort him, I stayed in my seat and patiently waited for him to go on.

  “Initially, it was pretty devastating.” He cleared his throat. “She and the girls were all I’d ever known. I’d figured now that the kids would be gone, it was our chance to finally get to know each other again, to figure out what we wanted the rest of our lives together to look like.” I watched as he pushe
d his head back into his hands, as if trying to relieve the pressure building in his shoulders and neck. “But she didn't want anything to do with that. We’d both continued to play our instruments, but I was clueless to the fact that she’d been applying to music school for years. When she finally got an acceptance letter, she was ready to move on with her life. Alone.”

  Now at the end of his story, he released the grip on his fingers and leaned toward the coffee table, grabbing his cup to finish the last sip. “She’s graduating a year ahead of time and has already worked as an assistant for a few of the professors.” He turned the now empty cup back and forth in his hands. “One of which, she’s now dating.”

  My nails made a scratching sound as I gripped the throw pillow in my lap. I hadn’t even realized how angry I’d become on his behalf until he gave me a curious look. I smiled and motioned for him to go on, he had my full attention again, but inside my blood was boiling at how unfair life had been to a good man like him.

  He shrugged, exhaling a huge sigh. “It took a little getting used to, but Dan’s a stand-up guy and the girls really like him. He’s extremely intellectual and exactly what Amanda wants and deserves. I have to say, going through life day to day, I never stopped to realize that, besides our younger puppy love, we’d never reached that deeper, mature love couples get to over time. Each of us missed out on finding that earlier in life, but I see it on her face now that she’s finally found it. And I’m happy for her.” After that story, I didn’t understand the contented look on his face.

  I couldn’t help but ask, “And what about you?”

  He shrugged. “I’ve moved on from our marriage, but I can’t say I’ve gone out with anyone who makes me want to explore anything deeper. Dating is tough at my age, especially now that everything’s gone electronic.” He cringed. “I tried a few dating sites before I moved here and, man, that was not for me. I don’t get this whole ‘slide left, slide right’, hook up for the night then do it all over again with someone else the following evening. I’ve gone on a few dates with women who weren’t interested in wining and dining or even hearing what my last name was. They wanted to come straight to my place or have me go to theirs.” He gave me a poignant look. “Call me old fashioned, but I’d like to get to know a woman before we roll around in bed together.”

 

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