by Becca Nyx
“First thing in the morning.” Kelly confirms
“I see how it is. Leave me out why don’t you.” Ryan pretends to pout.
“Oh come on, you know you don’t have single class with us tomorrow.” I say giving Ryan a playful shove and he laughs. “I’d better get back to my room, though I don’t want to be late again tomorrow.”
“I’m ready for a love affair with my blankets and pillow,” Kelly says.
“I guess I’ll text you two later.” Ryan smiles; Kelly and I laugh as we go our separate ways, waving to each other as we part.
I can’t say I’m too excited about returning to my dorm, I don’t know if Gabriel is there, but if I walk in on them cuddling and kissing, I don’t know if I’ll be able to handle it. It should be me that he’s holding and kissing, not her. I try to hold off my frustration that I feel building and think about something else. I wish Kelly was my roommate, but that didn’t happen. We were a little behind on filling out the paperwork and we ended up having to choose dorms that were across campus from each other. Thankfully, the school’s rules are lax and we’re allowed to visit anyone we want to at any time.
I’m back at my dorm and I take a deep breath before I open the door; preparing myself for the worst. The lights are out and it’s quiet. I tip toe to my room not wanting to wake Emily up. I carefully ease the door closed and sit on my bed. I hear giggling in the other room.
“Stop, Gabriel” Emily giggles.
“Stop what? This?” Gabriel says playfully. There’s more giggling from Emily.
“I’m going to kiss you now,” Gabriel states. I lie back on my bed and imagine that it’s me being kissed. There’s silence in the other room, then “Oh! Gabriel! That feels so good!” Emily exclaims.
“You like it when I lick your pussy?” I hear Gabriel ask and I feel myself getting wet.
“Oh yes! Please don’t stop.” Emily blurts; her voice dripping with pleasure.
I close my eyes and think of Gabriel, with his dark brown hair and beautiful green eyes between my legs. Never in my life have I wanted someone more than I wanted him right now.
“It’s your turn now, babe” Gabriel says to Emily. “There you go, take it all in, baby”
“Just like that” Gabriel coaches Emily. I try to imagine what his penis looks like. It must be glorious, huge, and magnificent.
“That’s it, Keep going, and don’t stop yet. Oh! You dirty whore!” Gabriel exclaims.
“How do you want me to take you?” Gabriel asks Emily. In my mind I reply from behind and hard.
“Hard, and on top,” Emily says.
I can’t take it anymore; I take my pants off and slide my underwear down my legs. My hand finds its way down my body and to my clit; I rub it while I listen to Gabriel pound into Emily in the other room. I imagine what his dick must feel like inside of me and slide fingers in side of myself and move them around. If only he were in here with me. I bite my lip in angst, and feel my breast with my other hand, maneuvering between fabric and skin, finding my nipple and rubbing it until it gets hard.
“Harder!” Emily yells. The pounding gets faster and I rub myself faster. I hear Emily start to moan. I feel myself build up, and then I hear Gabriel moan. His cue sets me off and I rapidly breathe as I quietly climax, biting the knuckle of my index finger so I don’t moan.
I lay there, shirt disheveled and naked from the waist down. I want Gabriel to be mine, I want him with me, I want him next to me, I want him on top of me and most of all I want him inside of me. My body craves him and I realize I’ve never felt this way about someone before. I find my panties, pull them back on, get under my covers and dream about Gabriel. I feel his bulging muscles, hear sound of his voice when he climaxes, and see his green eyes staring at me.
Chapter Four
Dishy
My radio is blaring and I wake up with a jolt; dreams of Gabriel fade in my mind and then I remember last night. Desire stirs deep in my belly as I bite the knuckle of my index finger, oh the things I want him to do to me! I glance at the clock. I have plenty of time to get ready. I dig through my closet looking for something special to wear. My eyes light up when they land on just the right shirt; low cut with a tight vest to really show off my stuff. I find my best jeans and a matching pair of stilettos. I approve of myself in the mirror as I look at the milky skinned, honey colored hair and amber eyed girl that look back at me. Today I will rival Kelly, and I will make heads turn, I resolve. I strive for perfection as I apply my makeup. Perfect; I let the word roll around in my mind. If I could find a word to describe Gabriel, that’s what it would be. He’s perfect and someone like me deserves perfection.
I look at the clock; checking the time, I grab my bag and walk towards the door; Can’t be late if I want to make perfect grades. Emily waves as I rush out the door. I speed walk up to Kelly, who is waiting outside of class, scanning the crowd. She smiles as her eyes fall on my face and I smile back, happy to see her. Kelly pulls me into a hug, and then releases me, checking out my outfit, “Wow! You look good.”
I look at Kelly, noticing her pale blue dress, with a white sweater and pale blue pumps, “Thanks, you look good too.”
We walk together into class; Kelly pulls out a chair, “Was your roommate’s boyfriend still over when you got back to your dorm?” She asks, she’s always looking for a good piece of gossip.
I giggle, “Yeah, he was. I heard them last night in her room.” I add, my face turning red. Kelly’s mouth pops open in shock, “No way!”
I clear my throat, “Yes, It was quite intense, to say the least.”
Kelly’s eyes are wide, “Were they loud?”
“I heard everything from the kissing, all the way to the final climax,” I grin.
Kelly’s mouth flies open again, “What did you do?”
I debate on telling her the truth and I decide that she wouldn’t believe me anyway, “Masturbated.” I state straight faced.
“You didn’t” Kelly gasps in shock.
“No, I didn’t, I listened to music. Who wants to listen to their roomie getting laid?” I knew she wouldn’t believe me; I’d die if she did.
Kelly shudders, “Not me.”
We pull out our books, papers, and pencils, as class starts and I work to push every distracting thought of Gabriel out of my head. I tell myself I can fantasize about him later, when I’m not trying to keep up with a professor who writes fast and erases even faster.
The rest of the day goes by without a hitch. I’m relieved as I put my last book in the bag. “Did you hear about the party Yolanda is throwing?” Kelly asks, slinging her book bag onto her shoulder.
“Yolanda who?” I ask as I pull my bag onto my shoulder.
“Yolanda Bernard, Wreck Hock will be playing.
“Wreck who?” I ask feeling more confused.
“Seriously?!? Are you blind? There are flyers everywhere! How have you not noticed them?” Kelly rolls her eyes and waves a flyer in my face. I take the flyer out of her hand, sure enough Yolanda Bernard, whoever that is, is throwing a party at the Nu Pi Tau house and Wreck Hock, will “melt my face off.” I look around, and I see more of the same flyers posted all over. “Gosh Kelly, I just don’t know.” I say giving her the flyer back
“What do you mean you don’t know? This is one of the biggest parties of the year! We have to be there.”
“Kelly, I have a lot of work to do. I need to get used to all the homework before I go to a party.”
“Ever since Stephanie’s party you haven’t been to any other party I’ve invited you to. What’s the big deal?” Kelly asks searching my eyes.
I close my eyes and then open them, “It has nothing to do with the party; I just don’t want to go. I won’t have fun anyway; I’ll just want to do homework and I won’t be any fun.” I tell her and realize I’m running out of excuses to not go, but right now I don’t want to think about it.
Kelly considers what I say, “Well since you won’t go, can I ask Ryan to come with me?”
“Why would I care if Ryan goes with you or not?”
Kelly looks down and shuffles her feet. “I don’t know you two spend a lot of time together, I wanted to ask in case you had plans for him.” She shrugs.
“No I don’t. Go have fun.” I say and offer a convincing smile.
“I still wish you would come with me.” Kelly sighs
“I’ll go with you once I get used to everything, I promise.”
“Okay.” Kelly smiles, “I’ll see you tomorrow?”
“Uh, yeah sure.” I say and brush my hair behind my ear with my hand.
“I’ll text you,” She says and walks away.
“Okay,” I wave as she leaves.
Stephanie’s party; I shake my head and wrap my arms around myself. I got drunk that night. Usually I don’t drink that much, but I felt like celebrating. That night I ran into I guy. I don’t remember much about him, not even his name, just that he brought me a drink and the rest of the night is a blur. All I remember is waking up, shirt disheveled, bra unsnapped, pants and underwear on the floor. I’m not sure what happened, but I’m sure I had sex. I can’t even remember what he looked like. Tears spring into my eyes as I remember my confusion as I put the pieces together that morning. I was drugged and raped. I felt stupid for trusting a stranger to bring me a drink. I felt ashamed for drinking as much as I did in the first place. I should have been more careful. I should have been in control, but I wasn’t. If I had just said no when he gave me the drink or if I had a few less drinks then maybe it wouldn’t have happened. If; that word sits in my mind, haunting me. I never told Kelly or Ryan. What good would it do? They can’t help me. They can’t take away the events of that night, no one can. Ever since that night I haven’t trusted myself at a party. I do want to go to a party again, I just need more time, and when I go I will be careful with how much I drink. I will not let myself be drugged and raped again.
I wipe my eyes and take a deep breath as I open the door to my dorm. Emily isn’t home. I look around and notice dishes and trash piling. Cleaning will take my mind off of that dark night. I go to my room and change into pink cloth shorts and a black tank top. I take off my bra, grab my laptop and put on some fast upbeat music. Soon my mood changes and I’m dancing around while I wash the dishes when there’s a knock at the door. Weird, I think to myself. I’m not expecting anyone and Emily has keys to get in. I dry off my hands, turn off the music and open the door. Gabriel is standing there; his hair sticks up in different directions adding to his overall appeal. He’s wearing a white t-shirt and light blue jeans. “Hi,” he says as I stand with the door wide open looking, and drooling.
I wipe my chin and blush, “Emily isn’t here.”
Gabriel looks around the room, “Oh. She isn’t?”
“No, I don’t know when she’ll be back either. I’ll tell her you stopped by?”
I start to close the door, Gabriel hold up his hand to stop it, “You don’t mind if I come in do you?”
I move back so he can come in, “No.” Gabriel walks inside and I close the door behind him. I take a deep breath, trying to calm my nerves, Gabriel is here in my dorm and Emily isn’t here, I think to myself, why is he here? I ponder wondering what his intention is. Gabriel sits on the couch and I realize that I’m staring again, “Can I get you something to drink?” I ask. “We have water, juice, diet soda…”
“Water” Gabriel decides as I find a cup and fill it with water and ice. I hand him the cup and our fingers brush. I feel that same electric current run my arm as our eyes meet.
Gabriel takes a sip of water, not taking his eyes off of mine, “Is it cold in here or are you just happy to see me?” He smiles. I follow his line of sight and realize he’s staring at my chest. My bra! I took it off! My face turns bright red, “I’m so sorry.” I say wrapping my arms in front of my chest.
“It’s okay, I don’t mind,” Gabriel smiles
“I’ll be right back.” I say as I dash to my room. I’m never taking my bra off again; I vow. I can hear Gabriel chuckle in the other room.
I walk back in, once I triple check that my bra is on and go directly to the sink. I’m too embarrassed to say anything the room is silent except for the plates; they clatter as I dump them into the water. I hear Gabriel’s voice, “How’s school?”
I wipe a plate with a soapy rag, “Stressful. It’s a lot more than I was expecting.”
“It’s always hard at first, but once you get used to it you get in your own groove and it’ll get easier.” Gabriel reassures.
I dip the rag back into the water, “I hope so. I was looking forward to finding some parties or socializing. All I seem to be able to do is study.”
“Just give it some time.” Gabriel advises “What are you studying?” He’s standing next to me, and places his cup on the counter. I jump as I see him in my peripheral vision. I didn’t even hear him get up.
“I want a degree in Aerospace Engineering with a minor in History, and ultimately, I want to work for NASA.” I say as I focus on the plate.
“Why?” He asks me as he takes the plate from my hands and rinses it.
I grab the cup Gabriel just placed on the counter and wash it thoroughly making sure to clean every surface. “Why not? I love science, and I love history. I want to explore space and I want to see what lies beyond earth. I also love history because I like learning from the past. I can learn from other people’s mistakes and make my life easier because of that.”
Gabriel takes the cup from my hand and rinses it, placing his fingers inside of it making sure the suds are gone, “Sounds like you know what you want.”
I bite my lip, “What about you? What are you studying?”
Gabriel places the cup in the dish rack, “I’m undeclared. I’m working on my core classes.”
I plunge the rag into the water, rinsing it out and enjoying the splash it makes as it enters the water. Water splatters onto Gabriel’s white shirt and I can see the definition of his muscles where his shirt has become translucent, “You’d better figure out what it is you want to do. After this year you’ll be out of core classes and you’ll have to start specific classes.”
Gabriel reaches deep into the sink feeling for a lost piece of silverware, “I’m sure I’ll figure it out by the end of the year.”
“Well what is it that you like to do?” I ask, curious about him and his life, but secretly, I’m hoping that he’ll say he wants to do me and bend me over the table and take me. I shake my head as I realize the tone of the conversation has changed.
“…Services of some kind, my Father is an alcoholic. I’d like to help people like him. I’d like to encourage women like my mother and tell them it’s okay to leave a deadbeat husband. I’d like to be there for the kids like me who didn’t have anyone to go to for help.” Gabriel ponders his gaze is distant.
I search Gabriel’s eyes and I see the pain that he’s trying to hide from me, “I’m sorry, I never knew my dad. It was probably for the best. He was long gone before I was born.”
Gabriel clears his throat, “It’s not your fault, No dad is better than a father who couldn’t function. His idea of bonding was having me bring him another beer.”
I place my hand on his shoulder, “Wow that must have been hard.”
Gabriel places a hand over mine, “It was; it was hard on me and my siblings.”
I feel a jolt run through my body as he closes his fingers around my hand, “How many siblings do you have?”
Gabriel looks away, “Two, a brother and a sister; my sister is older than me and my brother is younger than me.”
“Do you talk to them?” I ask my voice barely above a whisper.
“My brother, yes; my sister ran away when she was sixteen. We never heard from her again. I plan on finding her if I can. What about you?” Gabriel asks, letting go of my hand, whatever moment we were having is now over. “What’s your story?”
I fold my arms drawing into myself, “Well, as I said earlier, I never kne
w my father. My mother worked hard to provide for me. I didn’t get to see her much, but she showed me how important it is to work for what you want. The times that we did get to spend together are my happiest memories.”
Gabriel looks deep into my eyes, “Do you have any siblings?”
I return his gaze trying to read his thoughts, “No, I’m an only child. My mother is a very focused person. If she dated, I never knew about it. She never married either. So, I remained an only child. It was lonely at times, but I never had to share my mother with anyone else.”
Gabriel pats me on the shoulder, “Good for you, my mother was hard working, but she was run down. She had a lot of stress. If only she had the courage to leave my father…” Gabriel trails off.
“I’m sorry; we don’t have to talk about this anymore.” I return my attention back to the dishes and begin washing a bowl. “What are your plans for today?” I ask with a smile adding a little pep to my tone, trying to lighten Gabriel’s mood. I see him glance down at his watch and his eyes widen in surprise. “What?” I ask.
“I have to go. I have to go to work. I lost track of time.” Gabriel fumbles with the bowl, dunking it in the water before placing it on the rack, “It was nice talking to you.” Gabriel nods and walks towards the door.
“But you didn’t get to see Emily.” I blurt, drying my hand on my shirt.
“It’s alright; I had a really nice time talking to you, really. I’m sorry to rush out on you like this. I would love to continue the conversation sometime.” Gabriel grins.
I return his smile and call after him, “I enjoyed talking to you too.”
“I’ll see you soon.” He says before leaving.
“Okay.” I mutter to myself as the door closes the thud echoes in my mind. I miss him already. I look over at the dishes. I’ve lost my motivation to finish them. I grab my laptop off the table and take it to my room. A few minutes later I hear Emily come in.
“I’m not doing anything tonight, you should come over.” She offers; she must be on the phone.
