by Rue Vespers
He drained it and his wound evanesced. “Who did that?” he shouted as the mob surged past him. “You owe me fifteen golds for a health potion!”
His eyes wide, Jenner just stared at the pandemonium as it gradually moved from the boat to the dock. Human players were pulling out swords and drinking from ampoules. Some of them thickened with muscles; others faded away almost to invisibility. One man clutched at his neck in panic before shoving his hand into his pocket, withdrawing a clay amulet on a chain. He drew it over his head and ran away as fast as an elf. That amulet was a blessing; perhaps the shifting symbols in wire were blessings as well. None of the caddies wore them, but many of their human masters did.
“Get out of the way!”
“Why are you just standing there? Move aside and drink that crap somewhere else!”
“GET OUT OF MY WAY!”
“Loso! Loso! You brought the wrong bag, goddammit! You brought my fucking clothes! What am I going to do with my clothes instead of my weapons here? Dress the damn monsters in my skirts?”
“MOVE IT OR I’LL MAKE YOU MOVE IT!”
Splash.
“It’s always like this,” Master Tosco remarked. “Aw, hell, I used to do it, too.”
“You did?” This behavior was so . . . undignified. Jenner couldn’t imagine Master Tosco doing anything other than what he was doing now, which was watching the hubbub in scorn and amusement.
“Sure, sure, I did it,” Master Tosco confessed, rolling his eyes as a brawl broke out between three men. “We only have four hours, and if you’re headed for the mountain, it takes half an hour to get there at elf speed. Every second counts on the islands. But it’s a stupid way to lose some of your health points, isn’t it? Save them for the monsters.”
“Yeah,” Jenner agreed.
Rosy scoffed in derision.
The brawl ended with two men being shoved over the side to the water and the third man running down the dock to Hard Mode. Swearing at his back, the pair of men swam for shore rather than clamber back onto the planks. The last of the fortune hunters finally squeezed through the doors and took off at a sprint.
Piercing screeches ripped through the air, drawing Jenner’s eyes upwards where flying forms circled above the trees. “What are those?” he asked.
“Harpies,” Master Tosco said, stripping off his cloak. It disappeared into his inventory. “Nasty creatures. But they’re tree-dwellers. We aren’t going anywhere near the trees.”
Jenner took off his cloak, too. It was too hot to wear. Plenty of players had left their cloaks behind on the boat, draped over benches and the railing and even just dropped on the deck. “Where are we going then?”
“You’d be surprised what you can find right around the beach,” Master Tosco replied, tossing Jenner’s cloak over a table. Jenner did not protest this; nobody was going to steal that crappy thing. “King-flowers worth a silver piece each; dig up a few troggets and those are worth a gold. Well, what do you say? Let’s go make some money, caddy!”
Chapter Ten
Had he ever been to a beach before?
Like so much else in Jenner’s brain, the answer was a void. He understood that this was a beach, and a quite lovely one at that. The sand was unmarked by footprints, a clean sweep of snowy white that ran down to meet the aquamarine waves slowly rolling in. A warm breeze rustled through the brilliant green trees that ringed the shore, hidden birds calling and cooing from within.
It was hard to see this beach as part of a game, let alone dangerous territory. All it was missing was people in swimsuits splayed out on towels to work on their tans and gamboling about in the shallows. The teacup’s paranoia seemed grossly out of place: it was practically twirling around on Jenner’s shoulder in its efforts to watch everything around them at once.
Clearly, Jenner’s brain knew plenty about beaches: what they looked like and what people did upon them. But had he been to one? With his family, whoever they were? With a girlfriend? Was she pretty? What was her name?
Nothing.
Zip.
Zilch.
Zero.
Nada.
“Character upload addition?” Jenner said quietly. It bugged him, seriously bugged him, to think that he might have a girlfriend in the outer-world, a girlfriend lost behind a veil as impenetrable as the one around Unlockable Island.
Permanent Character Addition
You are being uploaded to the game. Check in at any time for an update.
Current Upload: 7.1%
Goddamn! Slow as molasses in January. Remembering the flat eyes of that soulless man in the street gave Jenner a chill even with the sun shining down hot on the crown of his head.
Master Tosco was striding ten paces ahead, so thoroughly unconcerned about the monsters on this island that his sword was in its scabbard. His blasé attitude was a comfort. He really did know the Fortune Islands. While everybody else acted like kids diving after candy to fall out of a split piñata, Master Tosco was in the kitchen and stuffing his mouth with birthday cake. No need to run hysterically for that mountain: there was good money to be made on the beach, half a mile from the dock.
“Careful of those darker patches!” Master Tosco threw over his shoulder, motioning to an area on the beach where the sand was more yellow than white. “It’s called tar-sand.”
“Will do,” Jenner replied.
Rosy blew a raspberry to make its opinion known.
Then Master Tosco stopped and bent down upon a knee. Hurrying to catch up, Jenner looked at what had caught the man’s attention. A small thatch of green grass was growing out of the white sand.
Combing through the strands, the man pinched free a tiny flower with stiff purple petals. “In my things,” he said, “you’ll find a few metal hand-cases with flowers engraved on the lids. They should be all together in a mesh bag. Pull out the one with the king-flower for this. Apothecary chemists always appreciate tidy scavengers.” He rubbed his fingers together to indicate how those chemists expressed their appreciation.
Jenner pulled down the zipper and peered within to an incredible collection of weaponry and tools. Locating the mesh bag, he sorted through the circular cases for the one with the king-flower. “These flowers are worth a silver each? They’re so tiny!” he said as he gave the correct case over.
Master Tosco popped open the lid and dropped the flower inside the empty case, saying, “King-flowers only grow in the Fortune Islands, and only upon the beaches here and there. Wizards use them for spell ingredients. I once earned one hundred silvers in a single trip to Normal just from finding a large patch of king-flowers. Ninety-nine percent of hunters run right past them. Put this case in your pocket and keep a keen eye out for these patches of grass. I hate passing up money.”
Rosy grumbled to itself, but did not contradict. Then something stirred in the sand a few paces away, a strange bubbling-up within the white.
Master Tosco got up fast and snagged the handle of the bag. Swinging it over his shoulder, he said, “Quick! It’s a scorpion nest. Get to the water.”
They rushed down the beach to where the sand grew packed, and did not stop until their boots were in the froth of a fanning wave. The nest was upchucking red scorpions, which pattered down in the sand and swiveled about to look for prey. A few started their way, but shied back once they came to the packed sand. Only one dared to step upon it. As another wave gushed around Jenner’s feet and raced up the shore, the scorpion turned and fled.
“A large nest,” Master Tosco warned, resuming their walk along the beach but staying close to the water, “can blanket fifty paces of the sand in seconds. You can’t know the size of the nest until it’s too late, so the moment you see that bubbling motion, you get away. Go to the water; these scorpions hate it. There aren’t any nests on the sands of Easy Street, but on Normal and Hard Mode, they’re quite common. In Extreme, they fly, or so I’ve heard.”
“Are they worth anything?” Jenner inquired.
“Red scorpions? They are
n’t worth shit, and their sting is poisonous. Too many stings and you’re scrambled.”
They were far away from the nest by the time Master Tosco led their little party back up the shore. The beach narrowed just ahead to a thin strip of sand pinched between the water and towering gray cliffs, which were still wet and dripping from their rise from the sea. They were pockmarked with caves.
Jagged, weather-beaten rocks jutted up through the sand. Cautiously, Jenner moved around them while he watched for telltale bubbles. He collected another king-flower, the game congratulating him for acquiring it, as Master Tosco loped for the cliffs with his boots kicking up the sand.
“Are you not talking to me?” Jenner asked Rosy, who was grumbling under its breath.
“Why talk?” Rosy snapped. “You aren’t going to listen to me anyway, asshole.”
In aggravation, Jenner picked up another flower. Fine. If the teacup wanted to pout, then let it pout in silence.
Master Tosco kicked up more sand and doubled over to see something. “There we are!”
“More king-flowers?” Jenner asked.
“Nope! It’s a trogget tail. Typically they shift from place to place upon the islands, but I always find one around here.” He nudged an object in the sand with the point of his boot. It looked like a bristly little potato. “Dragon shifters pay out the snout for these. The synthetic ones aren’t as good. They bathe in them to shine their scales and shed their old ones. These tend to grow in a line, so here.” He gave Jenner a long pouch. “Follow the tail wherever it goes until that pouch is full. Mind the tar-sand over there. I’m going to climb the cliffs and search for some other things.”
The master went off, taking the big bag with him. Jenner dropped down obediently to paw through the sand for troggets. Jumping off his shoulder, Rosy hopped around while swearing about the Fortune Islands and stupid scuttle.
“Watch for scorpion nests,” Jenner snapped at the cup. “Do something helpful.”
Still swearing, Rosy turned around to do so as Master Tosco climbed the face of the cliff by free-hand. Stopping at a plateau about fifteen feet off the ground, the man rooted around there industriously. He stuffed something in another case and resumed climbing.
This was supposed to be a tail, wasn’t it? Where in the hell were the rest of the potatoes? Just as Jenner began to think he was searching in the wrong area, his fingers closed around a trogget.
Happily, he shook off the sand and dropped it into the pouch.
You have found a trogget. These spiny little sand potatoes are popular among juvenile dragons for cleaning their scales as well as foodies willing to splash out gold on a delicacy! Trogget fries, as renowned Talvenor chef Pius Thalassus notes, are ‘like French fries, only perfected’. Although farmers have tried countless times to grow troggets elsewhere in the country, they have been unsuccessful.
Fun Fact Time! Why don’t dragons dig up their own troggets? They prefer to let-
“I’m working,” Jenner said in aggravation. The blocks flew off. “I don’t care why dragons don’t dig up their own troggets.”
“Because they’re fucking dragons,” Rosy said as Jenner crawled about in the sand to dig. “Dragons love shiny shit. They can’t help themselves. You send a team of dragons to the Fortune Islands to dig up troggets and they’ll churn through the sand for a few minutes and then fly off to chase after the hoard of jewels and artifacts in the mountain. The human Houses won’t rent out trogget teams to dragon Houses anymore, because they’re still sore that the dragons broke their word and left Emmerlin the Strong’s House high and dry in the Nightstorm.”
“Mmm-hmm,” Jenner said absent-mindedly.
He lost track of time as he worked. The tail of troggets led him closer and closer to a tall gash in the cliff. The sun didn’t shine far into the cave there, illuminating only a patch of white sand that ran into darkness. Jenner checked it occasionally, a tad worried that if a scorpion nest boiled up to the surface inside, he might not see it quickly enough to flee for the water. He also stayed mindful of the tar-sand patches. There were a lot of them scattered around in this area, though none were very large. Fortunately, the tail of potatoes never went near them.
The pouch grew heavy. He tied its drawstrings to his belt and dragged it along, pausing a few times in his trogget search to put more king-flowers in the metal case. Master Tosco had moved so high up the cliff that he was lost to sight. Determined to have the pouch full by the time the man returned, Jenner worked as fast as he could.
Yesterday, a job earning fifteen pence was an amazing thing. Today he wouldn’t give a crappy job like that a second glance. Digging up a fat sand potato twice the size of the rest, he contemplated in delight what he would be able to afford with one-twentieth of their earnings. Armor. Highly enchanted clothes. And what about a nice meal at a restaurant? He didn’t mind eating out of vendor drums, but something else would be good, too.
“Oh, shit,” Rosy said. “Oh, shit! SHIT!”
The little teacup was staring into the cave in horror.
Fearful of scorpion nests, Jenner looked in with alarm.
No bubbling sand or red scorpions were there, though. He saw an . . . it.
And it saw him.
A monster. A giant monster.
The monster was partially concealed by the shadows within the cave. It stared back at Jenner and Rosy through dozens of eyes, all of them gathered together in two clusters upon its head, and then it stepped forward into the light.
Chapter Eleven
It was several nightmares stitched together into one ludicrous yet horrifying being.
The compound eyes of a fly rested upon a scorpion-like head, clackers snapping together around its mouth. Two massive orange claws opened and closed as eight legs propelled this freakish thing forward. A frill of translucent tentacles decorated the hardened shell of its back, moving sinuously as if the monster was underwater instead of on land. It was well over five feet tall. With Jenner down on his knees, it felt even taller than that.
And the teeth . . . caught within its rows of broken teeth were heads. Human heads, dwarf heads, elf heads, all of them bloated and slack-jawed and gored through, their hanging shreds of hair encrusted with salt.
Uh-oh! You have discovered a cave lurker! These monsters are devilishly hard to kill and fiercely protective of their cave-homes. One pinch of those claws can snap a player under Level 30 in half, and watch out for their acidic saliva! Is it really worth it to find out what they work so hard to protect in their caves?
Someone shrieked. It was Jenner himself.
A woman was screaming with him. No, that scream was coming from Rosy, the teacup’s baritone fleeing it for an ear-piercing soprano.
The frill of tentacles whipped about and sprayed a gooey green mass at them. It splashed down by Jenner’s knees, droplets kicking up and striking his trousers. The fabric smoked, and his skin beneath began to burn.
He barely felt the pain. He was so frightened that his mind vacated the building, leaving him a body in motion. Without thinking, he hurled the trogget in his fingers. It was a bad throw, a weak throw, borne less of Jenner trying to hurt the creature as it was an instinctual need to have his hands free.
Jenner scrabbled through the sand in an attempt to back away and get up simultaneously. He failed at both goals, losing his balance and landing flat on his back. As the frill rippled, preparing to spit again, Rosy screeched, “Move! Move! Move!”
Jenner rolled aside as another gooey mass of acid spit rained down. Then he was pushing up to his feet, still brainlessly screaming as the teacup hopped away in panic from the mouth of the cave. Jenner charged after it.
“Thanks, kid! Happy scrambling and better luck next life!”
The speaker was Master Tosco.
He was standing upon a rocky plateau positioned directly above the cave, a rope in his fist. Jumping into the air, he swung down towards the gash with stones sprinkling from his fingers.
The stones hit the
sand all around the creature, a couple pinging off its shell, and erupted into smoke. As the beast scuttled all the way out of the cave, its gaze fixed upon Jenner, the master vanished into the thick gray haze.
The rope swung back into view a moment later without him.
This had been a trick. All of it! Just a lousy, rotten trick to sneak into the cave to treasure hunt while the monster was focused on a kill. And Jenner was that kill.
He ran.
Did cave lurkers know how to swim? Would he be safe in the water?
Did he know how to swim?
The answers didn’t matter, because the cave lurker was suddenly between Jenner and the waves. From its mouth, that terrifying mouth with the rotting heads inside, issued a hiss.
Jenner stopped so fast to keep from running into it that he almost fell over. Rosy did fall over, its handle burying itself in the sand. As the teacup wriggled about to right itself, the lurker stalked for them.
Diving for Rosy, Jenner popped the cup onto his shoulder and backed away. “I’m not going to say I told you so,” Rosy said, “but I told you so. I told you so! I told you so!”
Jenner’s heart pounded madly.
He dodged to the right.
The lurker cut him off.
He dodged to the left.
The lurker cut him off again.
Claws snapping, it continued forward.
It was herding him. Herding him back to the cave, where the smoke was already dissipating. It wanted to kill him there.
Jenner stepped backwards again and again. There was nowhere else to go. Every time he feinted to the right or left, the cave lurker moved twice as fast to block him. Recalling his dagger all of a sudden, he snatched it from his belt and brandished it. “YAAAH!”
