by MK Harkins
***
It was the morning of the fundraising event, Valentine’s Day, and I couldn’t get out of bed. I had hoped the pain of losing Jain would gradually get better, but it was getting worse. I hadn’t moved for three days, not even to eat or take a shower. It had been a week since I’d gone into the office. I was always working, so this was unusual for me. I never took time off. Todd called daily. He was swamped with work, my work, but I didn’t care. I couldn’t.
The phone rang again. I picked it up and threw it against the wall. I felt satisfaction as I watched it break apart and fall to the floor in pieces. I knew I had to get up. I had to be at the event this evening, but I wanted a few more hours.
Jain would be at the fundraiser tonight. I’d made sure of it. She’d probably be with Erik. Could I endure watching them all night? It had been three weeks since I prevented the kiss at the Space Needle, but I knew there would have been many opportunities for them to have finished what they’d started. I rolled over and groaned. I was sick of feeling sorry for myself, but I was stuck. I was trapped in a situation of my own making. First, I ruined my relationship with Jain, then I made sure she’d never take me back.
A loud pounding at my door snapped me out of my self-pity. I was at the condo in the city because I couldn’t face going back home to Carnation yet.
I threw open the door. I already knew it was Todd.
I was wrong.
“Dad?”
“I’ve come to talk to you about a few things.” He frowned and rubbed the back of his neck.
“Sorry, I’m not up for visitors just now.” I didn’t want to talk to him. Not when I was feeling this way.
“That’s obvious, and that’s exactly why I’m here.” He walked past me, down the hall to my living room.
“Well, make yourself at home,” I replied sarcastically.
He sat on the couch and started. “I have a story to tell you, and I want you to listen carefully.” His eyes bored into mine.
I’d never seen him like this. He was always so good-natured and laid back.
“What story?”
“It’s about your mom.” He had my attention because he rarely talked about Mom.
“It was love at first sight, you know. People always say it isn’t possible, that it’s more of a lust thing. But they’re wrong. Well, partially wrong. I did have the lust part.”
“Dad, TMI”
He scratched his head. “What’s TMI?”
I let out a frustrated groan, “Too much information, Dad.”
“Oh.” He chuckled. “I guess you don’t need to hear those details.” He took a deep breath. “Do you know why I don’t talk about your mom very much?” he asked.
“No, not really.”
“It’s because it hurts too much. To me, it’s like it was yesterday when she died.” He looked down and rubbed his eyes. “She was beautiful.” He shook his head. “But mostly, she was beautiful on the inside. People were drawn to her because of her kindness and charity toward others. Did you know she worked at a soup kitchen every Saturday, rain or shine? Even if she was sick, she’d put sanitizer on her hands, a face mask to protect others, and off she’d go. She also volunteered at Children’s Hospital. You know what she did? She rocked crack babies for hours, trying to soothe them. She told me she was so thankful for you, for being a healthy baby, she wanted to give some comfort to the children who didn’t get a good start in life. You know what I miss most about her though? She loved us. She loved with everything in her, and I loved her right back.”
“Why haven’t you told me any of these stories, Dad? I’ve wondered about her my entire life, and you only gave me crumbs here and there.”
“I’m so sorry. I should have. I’ve been selfish.” He began to cry. I’d seen my father go through the gamut of emotions throughout my life, but I’d never seen him shed a tear.
“It’s okay, Dad. I’m not angry. I’ve just always been so curious.”
“I haven’t wanted to talk about her because this is what I do, every time. I cry. After all these years, the pain is still like a knife in my gut. If I push her out with the memories, I can function. But barely.” He straightened. “Braydon, I want you to be honest with me.”
“Sure, Dad”
“Does this sound familiar? Are you experiencing this? Because, if you are, I’m here to tell you, it doesn’t go away. When you lose someone, someone special, you never get over it. I know you’re dating someone new. I read the papers. But what I saw on Thanksgiving reminded me of your mother and me. You and Jain had the same type of connection. I fell in love with Jain in one day. I can’t imagine how you must feel right now.”
All the horrible months without her came crashing down like a tsunami on a deserted beach. I’d been dead inside, hopeless and defeated. I was lost, swirling with the wild current of emotion that would eventually drown me.
“I blew it, Dad. Not once, but twice. She’ll never take me back.”
“Listen to me now. I did not raise a quitter. You do not quit. Do you hear me, son? You get your sorry ass up, get some coffee, put on a tux, and go fight for her. Do whatever you have to do, but don’t give up.” He stood in front of me, yelling. Today was a day for unusual behavior from my dad.
He sagged back onto the couch. He leaned forward and rubbed his hands over his face. “I didn’t get a chance to fight for your mom. A drunk driver took her from us. Can you please do what I wasn’t able to? Go get the girl.”
What could I say? “Dad, if I’m going to do this thing, I’m going to need some help.”
“That’s what I’m here for.” A smile curved his lips. I think he had a plan.
FORTY-TWO
Jain
“Colin, I’m so nervous. Do you think I look all right?” I asked. Why did I agree to this? Public speaking had always terrified me. Martin and Colin seemed dead-set on it. I felt compelled. After all, it was my passion, my reason for getting up in the morning.
“You look fabulous. Don’t be nervous. If you do, just look at me.” He bared his teeth in an overly exaggerated smile.
“If you wear that expression, all I’ll do is giggle. That wouldn’t be professional.”
He gave me a comforting hug. “Jain, I have every bit of faith in you. I know you can do this.”
“I just figured out why I love you so much.”
“Because I’m charming and witty?”
“Because you’re my biggest cheerleader. I don’t have my mom anymore.” I stopped to blink back the tears. “But you’re doing a splendid job filling in.”
“Jain, that’s the nicest compliment you could ever give me.” He had his hand over his heart. “Who needs men anyway?” he scoffed.
I do. I need Braydon. “Me! That’s who.” Where did that come from?
We were in the back dressing room in the hotel ballroom. I sat down on one of the upholstered chaise lounges that they had scattered around. Braydon had outdone himself, from the elegant location of the event, to the stunning décor throughout the ballroom. It was magical, with romantic lighting strung from the ceiling, and heart-shaped appetizers laid out on exquisitely decorated tables. The theme of the night was love and passion, and he’d done a terrific job capturing the mood.
“Any man in particular you’re referring to?”
“He didn’t fight for me, Colin. He didn’t fight for us.” The tears continued to flow. “I can’t talk about this right now. My mascara will run.”
“Hold off. What do you mean, he didn’t fight for you? Your condo was like a florist shop for a month. You burned and threw away every note, every card.” His eyes were huge, his mouth gaped open. Why was he so surprised?
“It only lasted a little over a month. That’s not very long at all. He just gave up, threw in the towel, and hooked up with that jewelry store girl.” I had a hard time even speaking the words.
Colin sat next to me on the sofa and exhaled a long breath. “Jain, you wanted him to give up. Remember when you were sick over Christmas? That�
�s all you talked about. You kept telling me it was too painful. You said you wanted Braydon to leave you alone so you could move on. You were very insistent.”
“You took me for my word? I had a fever! I didn’t know what I was talking about. I barely remember those three days. Who believes someone when they’re that ill?” I stopped, with a horrible thought. “Did you tell Braydon what I said?”
“I didn’t have to.”
No. No. No
“He was there,” I whispered, touching my lips.
“Yes, he was. It about broke my heart watching him. He didn’t want you to suffer anymore. He moved on to help you. To be honest, I don’t know if he ever did move on.”
“Oh, he did. I’ve seen pictures of him and Jewelry Girl all over the place. Don’t forget about their little tryst on New Year’s.”
“Jain, you know better than anyone that pictures, articles, or documents aren’t always as they seem.”
I’ll love you forever.
Braydon did this for me. He thought he was helping me. My heart fluttered.
“After I got over the hurt, I realized the love we had was more important than anything, but I thought it was too late. Do you think there’s a chance? Is he here yet?”
“Yes, I saw him about a half hour ago. He was talking to the caterer. But, I have to warn you, Tiffany came with him.”
My entire body deflated as that little seed of hope floated down the river. “Oh.”
“Keep your eyes and mind open. I have a feeling all is not how it appears.”
Ten minutes later, I was on stage in front of a packed house of three hundred of Seattle’s most active philanthropists. The ballroom was open and spacious, decorated in colors of pink and ivory to match the Valentine’s Day theme. The tables were decked out with the finest linen, china, and silver money could buy. Braydon had spared no expense making sure the guests were wined and dined properly.
The murmuring in the room stopped while I shuffled my note cards. I hoped I could remember my speech from memory, but I’d brought them as a back-up in case I froze.
“Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to the beautiful Paramount Hotel. My name is Jain Parker, and I’m one of the scientists at Bastion Medical Research. We are happy you’ve chosen to join us on this special day, Valentine’s Day, a day we set aside every year to dedicate to love. Our theme tonight is love and passion. I love my work, and I feel passionate about what we are accomplishing. With your help, we plan to find ways to treat, and possibly cure, ALS.” Overwhelmed by the import of my words, I paused for a moment to gather myself.
“As many of you know, finding a treatment or cure for ALS is near and dear to my heart. My healthy, vibrant mother was struck down by this disease in the prime of her life. I’ll spend the rest of mine fighting this disease for her, and for the many people who are diagnosed and yet to be diagnosed.”
There was a sharp screeching noise as the sound of another microphone was turned on.
“I have a question.” The voice came from somewhere in the back. It was shadowed in the corner, so I couldn’t make out who was asking the question. Was this supposed to be a question and answer session?
“Sure. What would you like to know?” I may as well be polite.
“What else will you be doing for the rest of your life?” The microphone was turned up too high. I couldn’t make out the voice. It sounded like… No.
“I’m sorry, sir, but we’re talking about ALS, not my life.” I scanned the room to see if I could locate Colin. Someone needed to deal with this crackpot.
“I’m talking about my life and yours. I’d like them to merge,” the voice said. It was clearer, stronger. The words, the voice….his voice. Could it be?
My heart skipped a few beats, accompanied by profuse sweating and rapid breathing. I didn’t want to allow myself to get my hopes up. I’d been thinking of him, dreaming of him, for months now. Please, God, let it be him.
The crowd began to buzz. Everyone was craning their necks and turning their heads toward the back. Out of the shadows stepped…Braydon. What was he doing? Next, his dad stepped forward, then Todd, and then…Tiffany? My eyes stayed on hers for an extra beat. She gave me a huge smile and blew me a kiss.
“Maybe we should talk in the back?” I asked. A thrill of emotions, all good, churned inside. This was really happening.
He jumped up on one of the unoccupied tables along the back wall. “A wise old man once told me…” He smiled at his dad, who proceeded to give him a playful punch in the leg. “He told me he didn’t raise a quitter. He told me to fight for the woman I loved.” He was still a long distance away, but I could see his gorgeous smile. I was stunned silent.
“He also told me that I needed to make a grand gesture to get my point across. He said women loved this stuff, so I’m going to take his word for it.” He turned to his father smiling.
“You ready dad?”
Brian reached over and turned on the sound system. The first notes of a ukulele unfolded as the medley of “Somewhere Over the Rainbow/What a Wonderful World” drifted out into the ballroom.
He remembered.
A few of the guests clapped in appreciation.
“I’ve put together some thoughts I want to share with you.” He turned. “You ready?”
His dad nodded and whispered to Todd, who in turn nudged Tiffany. She beamed a huge smile at me and picked up a large, white poster board sign, handed it to Todd, who in turn gave it to Braydon’s dad, who hoisted it up to Braydon. It looked like everyone wanted in on the action.
He held up the first card. The crowd, who was murmuring with excitement, immediately hushed in anticipation.
He dropped it and reached for the next sign.
The audience laughed. Braydon smiled.
The last card confused the crowd. I heard a few random voices questioning, “What the hell?” But I knew.
I leaned into the microphone and said clearly, “Okay.”
Braydon jumped off the table, crossed the room, hopped up on the stage, and announced to the crowd, “Now you’ll see some love and passion.” He held his hands on both sides of my face and whispered, “I’ll love you forever.” He laid his lips softly on mine and slowly showed me how much he loved me. When we broke apart many minutes later, we were greeted with clapping and cheering.
“I’m taking you home now, and I don’t plan on letting you go.” His smile was dazzling.
“Sure.”
His eyebrow raised.
“I don’t want to be too predictable.”
He laughed, his eyes crinkled, and all was right with the world.
EPILOGUE
Braydon
“This feels a lot like déjà vu,” Jain whispered.
It was Valentine’s Day, exactly one year after our reunion. We were back at the Paramount Hotel attending yet another fundraiser, this time for Breast Cancer Research.
I scanned the table. Everyone who was important to us was in attendance. Dad had brought his date, Jennifer. He told me after the spectacle I’d made of myself last year, the least he could do was follow his own advice. Colin and Charlie had made tiny paper airplanes out of the cocktail napkins and were shooting them around the table. I was glad Colin had someone now. I knew Jain would have worried about him otherwise.
Tiffany sat on Jain’s right, because those two were inseparable. They were polar opposites in some ways, but not in the ones that mattered. They’d started a foundation together to help families that struggled with the financial effects of ALS. They made a great team and were dedicated to change the world, as they would often say.
Todd sat to my left in a bored slouch. He referred to himself as the third wheel, and Jain and Tiffany had spent the better part of six months plotting to change that. They had at least four girls lined up for him this evening alone. He was picky though, so I doubted their machinations would prove successful.
One thing was certain, we wouldn’t run into Angela tonight or anytime soon. After the article
we’d planted hit the newsstands, things went downhill for her fast. It was the domino effect. People who were once afraid of her spoke out. She had spent most of her adult life manipulating and conniving to get what she wanted. She played with people’s lives, and hurt many in the process. We had accomplished what we’d set out to do, and with each new article, her true character was exposed. She was shunned, resulting in a hasty move to Russia, or was it Croatia? It didn’t matter, as long as I never had to see her again.
My eyes drifted back to Jain. She was stunning.
“Thank you for tonight. I know these events aren’t your favorite way to spend an evening.” I kissed her hand.
She rested her head on my shoulder. “I don’t mind. I do have to admit, though, our couch and a crackling fire sound good.” She paused. “Do you think Oreo and Nancy are behaving?”
At first, we’d put them in separate rooms, fearing they’d bite and scratch each other to death. But since we’d married nine months earlier, they had completely stopped their behavior. We couldn’t figure it out, but we weren’t going to question it.
They started the auction, so I kept my voice low. “They’ll be fine. Did you see them napping together on the couch this morning?”
The auctioneer announced the next item up for bid.
Jain’s head snapped up, “Oh, look Braydon. A plate of brownies!” Her eyes glossed over.
I had arranged for the brownies to be auctioned off tonight. The money would go to a good cause, so I didn’t care how much they cost. I raised my paddle.
Jain’s eyes flickered with merriment. “You’re going to buy me the brownies?”
“Do you remember our lunch at Angelo’s?” I asked.
A slow smile crossed her lips. “We talked about the men who bought their pregnant wives expensive brownies. Didn’t we both agree that love would never last?”
“That’s the conversation. We sure proved that wrong.” I reached over and smoothed my hand over her stomach. “This little guy…or girl is living proof.” I placed my mouth on her soft, full lips. I’d been kissing her almost constantly for the past year. It never got old.
