“Perhaps the metaphor … I need what power you can summon. What you can generate and transmit. Whatever this power is, or whatever its nature, I might be able to work with it.”
The old man straightened up slowly, then sat back. He let a long contemplative quiet intervene before answering: “I can’t transmit nothin’. I can’t generate nothin’. It don’t come like that.”
“Can you describe how it does come?”
The old man shook his gray head. “Ain’t no describin’. There’s feelin’. You got to feel it.”
“What is it?”
The old man studied him for a moment. “You not the man for it.”
“No?”
“No, suh. You not the man.”
“Is it the color of my skin?”
Silence again. The old man looked off to his left, out a window that offered a view of darkness obscuring nothing worth viewing.
At length he leaned forward and spoke calmly but with underlying controlled emotion. “Ain’t a matter of color. Matter of … experience. You born with a color, but every man, he live different. Do things different, different things happen to a man. He get to be different. He look at things his own way. No one can tell him, ’cause he know. It get into his blood and then he can’t go back, he is what he is. It get to be part of him like it was his color, like he was born with it. A man’s life ain’t like any other man’s life. It’s his own. Can’t do nothin’ but live it his own way. He got his pain, y’understand. Livin’ is pain. Don’t matter nohow if he happy or he sad. Livin’ is pain. Each man got his own pain. You got to take that … work with it. Shape it up. Use it. Then you got somethin’. But each man got his own. Ain’t no use tryin’ one man give it to another. Can’t be give out. You got to keep it. You got to work with it.”
The old man settled back in the easy chair again. His voice was soft as he said, “I don’t rightly know if you the man for it.”
“I’m willing to learn,” Carney said. “I can pay very well.” The Latin rhythms went on — tinny conga drums, maracas like rattling gravel. Suddenly, the music stopped. Quiet. A horn sounded outside.
Carney cocked his ear. He heard nothing. Velma had been sitting quietly. “You mind if I smoke, Mr …?”
“No, I don’t mind, miss. You go right ahead.” Velma lit a cigarette, looked around for an ashtray. She found one on the end table.
“You ain’t had enough pain,” the old man said.
“Maybe not,” Carney said. “I can’t say I regret that, but there it is. There are other considerations, though.”
“Yes, suh. They other things. Maybe you got ’em.”
“I think I do. As you said, each man is unique. The singular circumstances of his existence mold the clay of his character, the stuff of his inner substance, and the curves and contours are all his own, like his signature or the cracks in the palms of his hands.” Carney’s grin was lopsided. “That’s a fancy way of saying exactly what you said.”
“Mighty fancy.”
“There is a kind of pain that comes from seeing too much. Of living too much. Too long.”
The old man nodded. “I know. I know that for a fact.”
“There’s the pain that comes at the end of chasing down the wild possibilities until there’s nothing left to surprise you. Of ringing the changes over and over until there are no more permutations, all the treble bob majors rung. A melody played once too often. There’s a sickly feeling that goes with that, maybe a tiny hint of regret. Anxiety, too. You’re facing the big Nothingness. Because what does it all matter at the end, when the end comes? It doesn’t really matter what went on up to that point. I don’t think it matters one whit. When you’re faced with that yawning abyss … no, that’s too dramatic. Think of finding your last cigarette crumpled, a crack in it. Think of walking through a fun house and coming out into a junkyard. Think of … but I think you know what I mean. You see? Pain is universal. There is only one kind. Because, as you said, living is pain. It’s a struggle, from day to day, minute to minute. The heart works, pumping unceasingly, night and day, a complex machine beyond our comprehension. It sweats and strains and throbs, and if it muffs a rhythm, if it lets up for a second, we feel the life draining away from us. We’re that close to it, one heartthrob away from oblivion. We eat and work and play, skating on the thin ice of contingency. One moment we’re gliding along as usual, the next, into the chill depths, from which there is no returning. Do you get what I’m saying? The rub of it is that power, fame, or fortune won’t ease up the pain one iota. Not even love will, which is another kind of pain. We’re all inevitably alone with ourselves and with the awful realization that all of it means … nothing. Nothing at all. No matter what construction you wish to put on it, atheist or monotheist, nihilist or romanticist —”
Carney took a breath. He settled back into the worn velvet of the sofa and fanned himself with his hat, smiling. “Warm in here, isn’t it?”
“Yes, suh.” The old man smiled back. “Yes, suh.” He laughed, a low, dyspeptic cackle.
Then slowly, he rose and shuffled out of the room.
Velma crushed out her cigarette. She took out a small mirror from her purse and checked her lipstick, put the mirror back. She looked at Carney.
“What’s he have that you want, anyway?”
“Maybe nothing. Maybe nothing at all.”
“I need a drink.” She began the motions to light another cigarette.
“Maybe our host will oblige.”
He took the matches she was fumbling with and lit her cigarette. The flame danced in her eyes. She stared at him as she puffed. He reached across her to put the match in the ashtray.
“You have a lot of character in your face,” she said.
“I paid for every line of it.”
“No, you do. You have a very interesting face. Did anyone ever tell you that?”
“Not in so many words.”
“I can tell about a person just by their face. It’s all there. You can tell a lot.”
“What does my face tell you?”
“It’s strange. Interesting. You’ve done a lot, seen a lot.” She took a long drag, blew smoke into the greasy air. “Nobody really knows you. You keep it all inside.”
He nodded. “Ever work the carnival circuit? You have a good line of patter.”
“I mean it. You think I’m kidding. I know you. I can see inside of you.”
“Maybe you can.” He inclined his head toward the doorway. “How does the old man’s face read?”
She looked off and shrugged. “Old Tired.”
Carney tossed his hat onto the table beside the sofa. “It is kind of warm in here. Either that or I’m having hot flashes.”
The old man returned bearing a bottle and a cloth sack. He set the bottle down on the table. He raised the bag, fiddling with the drawstring until he had it open. He reached inside, felt around, and took out a darkly gnarled object and handed it to Carney.
Carney looked at it. It was some sort of root or twig, almost black, of a hardness not usual for wood or plant material.
“High John’s root?”
“Uh-uh. No, suh. That be Black Benjamin. You can’t hardly find that.”
“Really.”
“I spent a week in the woods, just sneakin’ up on it. You gots to sneak up on Black Benjamin. You turn around, you think you know where it is, and it gone, man. Gone. After I dug it up and brung it home, it just sit there and stew. It was madder’n hell I dug it out. It don’t wanta be out. It don’t want no one't’see it.”
“It’s sentient, then. It thinks.”
“Yessuh. It knows. Got a mind of its own, Black Ben.”
The old man rooted in the bag again and brought out a lump of a grayish substance. Carney took it. It was iron-heavy, and looked the part.
“Just a guess. Meteorite?”
“Yessuh. That’s what they calls it. Sky iron. I found that forty … no, forty-five years ago. Just layin’ on the ground. Sittin’ there
lookin’ up at me.”
“Nickel-iron,” Carney said. “Partially melted.”
The old man rummaged again. He brought forth a succession of odd stones, various roots, sprigs of henbane and liverwort, a bit of bone — other talismans.
Carney examined each item and pocketed it. When there was no more, he said, “Thank you.”
“But that all don’t mean a damn you not in the spirit. You gots't’get in the spirit.”
Carney picked up the bottle. The glass was old and dark. There was no label. He popped the cork and sniffed it.
“I get you a glass.”
“No, don’t bother.” Carney sniffed, then took a long pull on the bottle. He swallowed and started coughing.
The old man smiled with satisfaction.
“Jesus!” Carney gasped.
The old man cackled.
Carney caught his breath. “That went down hard.” He looked at the bottle. It was about three-quarters full. “Applejack?” he asked.
“Ain’t applejack.”
“Tastes like it, a little. Stronger. Apple brandy with hydrochloric acid, maybe. Damn.”
“You gots to drink it. A lot of it. The spirit’s what does it.”
“Yeah.” Carney drank again. This time the stuff coursed down easier, like lava down the slope of a volcanic cone. He drank again; then one more time. His eyes were watering.
“I think I’m going to be in the spirit very soon.”
“It do you good.”
Carney offered the bottle. “Join me?”
The old man shook his head. “I ain’t the one for it, either. Too old. Too used up. I threw it all away. I didn’t use it to no good at all. Can’t use it no more. You got to be careful with it. It use you like you use it.”
“Oh, yes.”
“It turn on you, you don’t watch out.”
“I can imagine.”
“Yessuh.”
The old man sat back down on the easy chair. “My granddaughter,” he said. “She need a job. Can’t get no work.”
“What does she do?”
“She went to school. She gots some education. College. Scholarship.”
“Wonderful.”
“She quit. Took up with some friends. They take her out drinkin’. All night sometime. She come home, sleep all day. She say she can’t get no work. Ain’t nothin’ she wanta do anyway, she say. No good jobs for colored girls. Don’t wanta make no beds or scrub no floors.”
“Can she write?”
“Yes, suh. Has a fine hand.”
“Yeah. I didn’t mean quite that. There’s a position open in one of my companies here in Dutchtown. Importers. They need someone to write brochures and catalogues. A little college is all a person would need.”
“These people … they colored?”
“Yes.”
The old man nodded. “She might like that. She one smart little girl. She could do it.”
“She’ll have to do her own typing.”
“She can do that too.”
“Castle Imports, East One Hundred Forty-fifth Street. Tell her to tell them I referred her.”
The old man nodded. “Thank you, suh.”
Carney took another swig. The stuff was flowing smoother now. “I’m beginning to like this.”
“It get better and better.”
“I’ll bet.” Carney set the bottle down. “I have to use your bathroom.”
“In the hall.”
The bathroom door was ajar. He opened it and stopped. There, on the floor in front of the commode, lay a girl of about nineteen. Her head was wedged between the seat and the wall. She had vomited and missed the bowl.
Carney checked her. Her eyelids fluttered and she moaned.
The woman was standing at the door.
“I don’t put her to bed no more. She can stay there all night for all I care. She can live in there.”
Carney picked her up. She was light, a soft bundle in a cerise cotton party dress, one shoe dangling.
He carried her into the bedroom and put her on the big bed. There was a quilt at the foot of the bed; he unfolded it and covered her. He looked at her face for a while. The girl was pretty.
Velma was standing behind him. He turned and she gave him his hat. She was holding the bottle.
“Let’s get out of here,” she said.
He took out a wad of bills and offered it to the woman. She regarded him gravely, looked at the money, then took it.
“Good night,” Carney said, putting on his hat. “Say goodbye to Mr. Hamilton for me.”
The woman nodded silently.
Tony woke up when the car door opened.
“Have your beauty rest?” Velma asked, sliding in beside him.
“Jeez, musta dozed off.” He rubbed his eyes.
Carney got in and shut the door. “Let’s get over into Hellgate.”
Tony watched Carney drink from the bottle. “You come all the way up here to buy some bootleg hooch?”
“Yeah. Start the car, you dumb guinea jerk.”
Chuckling, Tony turned the engine over. He was adjusting the choke when a car went past. Something made him lift his head.
“There’s Riordan.”
He gunned the motor, pulled out of the parking spot, made a U turn, and raced down the street, making the Leland’s engine whine and roar. He tore around the corner, left, raced a block, careened right, and nearly collided with an oncoming cab. A horn blared. He swerved, straightened out and slowed, glancing into the rearview mirror.
“I think we lost ’em.”
Tony cruised for a block, then checked the mirror again. His eyes widened.
“Madonn’!”
He floored the accelerator and the straight-eight Leland engine howled.
“Where’s the hardware?” Carney asked.
“On the floor in the back!”
Carney got to his knees and reached, couldn’t get it, and tumbled into the back seat. He picked up the submachine gun and cocked it. He pushed Velma down in the seat, then rolled down the back side window and stuck the barrel of the gun out.
A green Durant Roadmaster was pulling into the oncoming lane to pass. Carney let it have a few rounds in the general area of its huge shiny grille.
There was an answering shotgun blast that shattered the rear window. Carney ducked, waited, then sat up. He pointed his index finger through the jagged hole in the glass.
Fire left his finger and enveloped the Durant.
The Durant slowed, flames dancing on its shiny paint. But the fire began to dissipate, rolling off and turning to smoke. The flames soon burned out, leaving the car untouched. The big car sped to catch up.
“They got somethin’ workin’, boss!”
“Yeah, so I noticed.”
Tony tore right around a corner.
He slammed on the brakes, and Carney hit the back of the seat. Ahead, a huge truck was angled into the street, unloading, and blocking the way.
“Out!” Carney yelled. “Run for it!”
Tony reached into the back seat for the submachine gun, brought it out, opened the door, raised the gun and got off about twenty rounds before being cut down by a storm of bullets.
While that was happening, Carney opened the back door, rolled onto the pavement, crawled between two parked cars and hid behind one.
He heard advancing footsteps. He summoned power — and was amazed by how much was available.
“Carney!”
He recognized the voice as Seamus Riordan’s, who would have been Tweel’s capo de tutti capi had Tweel been Italian. Since he was not, Riordan was lieutenant hood, first under the demons.
“Come on out, Mr. Carney. You can’t win. The deng’s got us fixed up so good you can’t touch us. Come on out. We won’t hurt the dame. She’s one of us.”
Carney stood up.
Seamus Riordan, tall, tweed-jacketed and red-haired, stopped in his tracks when he saw the strange-looking long tube in Carney’s hands.
“Whatcha got
?”
“Bazooka,” Carney said.
“What’s that?”
Carney demonstrated, aiming at the Durant. The missile left the tube with a whoosh. By the time Riordan swiveled his head to follow it, the Durant had blossomed into a gorgeous red fireball. The concussion knocked Riordan down.
“They didn’t fix you up good enough,” Carney said.
Riordan got to his knees, groped for his lozenge-magazined submachine gun, got it and raised it — but by that time Carney was there to kick it away. Carney then kicked Riordan’s solar plexus.
“Not quite good enough, Seamus, me boy.”
Another kick. Riordan groaned.
“Were you sent to pick me up or kill me?”
“Pick you up.”
Carney’s foot found a softer spot near Riordan’s groin.
Riordan screamed, “Kill you!”
“That answer was extracted under duress, but I believe you.”
Carney went to Tony. Most of the bullets had found his legs, but a few had hit his chest. He was still conscious.
“Madonn’,” Tony said. “I’m hit. It don’t hurt, though. Funny. Always wondered.”
Velma was on her knees on the front seat, looking down at Tony.
Carney asked her, “You okay?”
She nodded, then reached for something. She handed Carney the bottle. “Saved it.”
Carney took it and pulled out the cork. He tipped the open bottle to Tony’s lips.
“Drink a little.”
Tony drank. He choked. “Boss, that tastes like lighter fluid.”
“You get used to it. It might save your life.”
The big Durant burned, thick black smoke coiling into the narrow band of sky between the tenements. Out of the sleeping city night, sirens approached.
Chapter Eighteen
Voyager
It was a tight fit for two beasts and two humans inside the tiny craft. There were four seats, but they were small, obviously designed for nonhuman occupants. Ironically, the nonhumans were the most discommoded: Snowclaw spilled out of his chair, and Goofus’s sufficed only for his tail and hind legs.
Jeremy’s voice came out of the intercom speaker. “Okay, everything seems to check out. We’re ready any time you guys are.”
“We’re ready as hell,” Gene said.
“Yeah, whatever that means.”
Castle Murders Page 16
