by Jen Andrews
“Stop right there, Jeremy.”
He’d gone from breaking up with her to talking and flirting with me all within the span of an evening? I couldn’t think straight with his overwhelming presence inside the car. Flinging open the car door, I scrambled out and jogged toward the small duck pond in the middle of the park.
“Wait, please,” he said, his voice pleading as he came up behind me. “When I broke up with her, I thought she’d left, but apparently, she hadn’t. Then you showed up. I was so caught off guard seeing you again all I wanted to do was get to know you. After you left, I swear, I just drove her home.”
“Can you give me a few minutes alone to think, please?” I glanced over my shoulder and saw the hint of panic and desperation in his eyes.
Nodding, Jeremy backed away and found a bench nearby.
The hot sun and heat made it hard to concentrate, so I lifted my long, light-peach colored dress above my knees, and kicked off my shoes. I slowly waded into the cool water. It calmed my nerves and cooled me off in the process.
Standing in the water, staring out across the pond at a duck and her babies, I thought long and hard about our conversation. When Jeremy said he’d tell me anything even if he knew I wouldn’t like the answer, he had done just that. I believed I was getting exactly what I’d asked for.
Glancing over my shoulder at Jeremy, I watched him for a minute. He sat forward on the bench with his elbows on his knees and his hands in his hair, staring down at the ground. Clearly, the situation was unsettling for him.
Was I crazy for believing him? I wasn’t sure, but I was willing to find out.
Suddenly, something brushed against my bare ankle under the water and I let out a yelp. It was gross and slimy. One quick glance down had me scrambling from the water with the grace of a drunken woman trying to run in hooker-heels. Jeremy was at the bank like a knight in shining armor to rescue me from the disgustingly large half-frog, half-tadpoles that had chased me from the pond.
He hoisted me into his arms.
And he was laughing at me.
“You’d think with that scream you just let out there was an alligator in the water or something,” he said, with a playful grin.
Apparently, I’d disturbed an entire army of the creepy things, because now they were swimming around the edge of the water. Lifting my wet, grass covered feet higher, even though he was holding me off the ground, I wrapped my arms around his shoulders and gave the slimy creatures a glare for embarrassing me.
“Those things could’ve climbed up my legs! Ughh. . . .” I shuddered and looked at Jeremy.
He let go of the laugh he’d been holding back.
“Shut up, hero.”
“Make me,” he said, his deep voice just above a whisper.
I pressed my lips to his, effectively putting a stop to his tormenting me.
When I pulled away, he sighed and pressed his cheek to mine. “Don’t worry, pretty girl, I wouldn’t have let them hurt you. I’d never let anything hurt you.”
My heart felt light in my chest and my body fit perfectly in his arms, so I let Jeremy carry me to the bench he’d been sitting on. Carefully, he set me down then jogged back to the edge of the pond and grabbed my shoes. He retrieved a towel and a bottle of water from his car. Kneeling in front of me, he poured the water over my feet to wash away the grass and dirt. After he dried them off, he helped me back into my shoes, then pulled down the hem of my dress and held his hand out to help me stand.
He didn’t let go after I stood. I loved it. And I trusted him.
“You know, Cammie said some awful things about you the day after we first met at Dub’s. But, I believe everything you’ve told me today.”
“Thank you. It means a lot to me. Do you want to get back on the road now and finish this conversation later?”
“Yeah, let’s get to Nanna’s.” Hand in hand, we walked back to his car.
I was nervous as hell when we arrived at the home where Teagan’s grandma lived. Unexpectedly, I’d met her mom and dad this morning and thought it had gone well although I had a feeling she’d planned to stop at her house.
The simple fact was I wanted to be with her and would do anything to make it happen. I would tell her my deepest, darkest secrets if that’s what she wanted.
When I woke up in the early morning hours with her still at my house, she was all around me. Her sweet scent was in the air, her clothes and other personal items mixed with mine.
She completed me. As cheesy as it sounded, I’d never felt more whole and thankful in my life.
I needed her to see she belonged here, too. When she’d asked questions while we were in the car, I’d been sickened at the lies Cammie and her friend Tiffany told her. After our visit with Teagan’s grandma, I would make sure we finished that discussion. I still needed to explain a lot to her. My story began long before I met Teagan, and I needed to show her I was trying hard to change my ways.
“Jeremy, can we talk about my nanna before we go in?” Teagan asked, pulling me away from my thoughts. I turned in my seat, giving her my full attention.
“She had a stroke in May and has some paralysis on her right side, so her speech is a bit slurred and it can be hard to understand sometimes. Her mind is quick and she knows what she wants to say, but she can’t get her brain and mouth to cooperate when she gets excited or frustrated. She’s in speech therapy and working her butt off to get better, but it’s taking time.”
“Thank you for telling me what to expect. I’ll do my best to pay attention. Will you let me know if I do or say something I shouldn’t?” I’d never known anyone in her grandma’s condition and hoped I wouldn’t do something wrong.
Teagan surprised the hell out of me when she leaned across the console and kissed me on the cheek. “You’ll do fine. I just wanted to prepare you. Let’s go.”
We rode the elevator to the fourth floor and found her grandma’s room. Since the building she lived in was a combination of home and hospital, the room looked like a typical bedroom, but with a few pieces of medical equipment blended in.
Teagan’s grandma sat on her bed propped against a few pillows, staring out the window.
“Nanna?” She didn’t seem to hear her, so Teagan moved closer and spoke louder. “Nanna?” The elderly woman turned. The left side of her mouth curved upward in a smile, but the right side remained almost motionless.
“Peaches,” she said slowly when she saw Teagan.
I would have to ask about her nickname later.
“Hi, Nanna, I’ve missed you so much.” Teagan hugged her grandmother then kissed her forehead.
“Me, too, Peaches,” her Grandma said, and patted Teagan’s arm.
Teagan turned and held her hand out to me. I walked forward and took her hand, interlacing our fingers. I loved the way her hands felt so perfect and warm in mine.
“Nanna, I’d like you to meet someone. This is my friend, Jeremy.” Teagan turned and smiled at me.
God, she’s beautiful.
“Jeremy, this is the original Teagan Shea Donnelly . . . my nanna.”
“Hello, Mrs. Donnelly,” I said to the woman with the same name as the woman who held my hand in hers. What an incredible honor for Teagan to share the same name as her grandmother.
Her grandma took a look at me, one side of her mouth turned up in a smile. “Oh, Peaches,” she said. “Sinatra eyes—lovely blue.”
Teagan laughed and glanced from her grandma to me. “Nanna has a thing for Frank Sinatra,” she said with a smile.
“Handsome man with pretty blue eyes,” her grandma said then looked from me to Teagan. I wasn’t sure if she was talking about Frank Sinatra or me at that point.
While Teagan made small talk with her grandmother, I quickly noticed what she’d mentioned earlier about her grandma getting frustrated easily. When she wanted to say something, it took her several tries, but eventually, the word would come.
After the last sentence, Teagan stood and pulled a book from the small book
shelf next to the bed. She handed the book to me. “She wants you to read her a poem. Are you game?”
I read the title and found it was a book of poetry by Yeats. I smiled, pleased with the old, worn book I held in my hand, because I was a fan of the writer. “Yeah, I can handle this.” I set a chair next to the bed and rested my elbow on the edge while I searched the book for the poem I wanted to read. When I found it, I began reading aloud, “Beloved, gaze in thine own heart . . .”
While I read, I would occasionally glance up to find Teagan and her grandma watching me closely. After I finished reading the last line, I peeked over at Teagan and she had tears in her eyes.
I hadn’t noticed while I was reading, but Teagan’s grandma had laid her hand in the crook of my elbow. She looked from me to her granddaughter.
Teagan stared at me in awe. “Jeremy, that was beautiful. Thank you.” Her bottom lip quivered and all I wanted to do right then was kiss her.
“Peaches,” Teagan’s grandma said then waited for Teagan to respond to her.
I stood to put the book back on the shelf then lingered there to give them time to visit. Teagan leaned closer to her grandma, and listened very carefully to the words the woman spoke.
After about ten minutes, Teagan straightened when their gradual conversation was finished. “Nanna?” She looked at me with an alarmed expression on her face.
“Is everything okay? Do I need to get someone for her?” I thought maybe something was wrong.
She shook her head and turned back to her grandma. “Are you sure, Nanna?”
Her grandma nodded without hesitation.
Teagan seemed taken aback by what her grandma had said to her. She rose to her feet as tears streamed down her face. She wiped them away with the back of her hand as her grandma peeked over at me, and then back at her namesake.
There was something very heavy and emotional going on between the two women and I didn’t know what to do. I watched as she carefully unclasped a necklace from her grandma’s neck then removed something from it. She put the necklace back on her grandma when she finished. Her grandma lifted her left hand and Teagan slid a ring off the woman’s finger. “Nanna, please . . . are you sure about this?”
Teagan’s voice was so intense with emotion it turned to a whisper as she finished her question.
Once again, her grandma nodded. “Yes. Peaches and Frank.” She laughed and so did Teagan.
Teagan wiped the remaining tears from her cheek and motioned for me to come and stand beside them. “Jeremy, she’s giving these to us.” She held her hand out and I saw two rings lying in the palm of her hand.
My brows furrowed in confusion as I stared down at the rings.
“They’re Nanna and Papa’s Claddagh rings.” She took a deep breath and let it out. “She wants to give you my papa’s ring, Jeremy.”
Holy shit. I didn’t know what the rings symbolized, but because of her reaction, I knew this was a big deal. “What do you want me to do?” I asked quietly.
“You need to take it,” she replied. Her grandma mumbled something, so Teagan leaned back in to listen. She looked at me with panic in her eyes. “She wants us to put them on each other.”
Not wanting to upset Teagan or her grandmother, I held out my hand.
She offered me the smaller of the two rings then held her right hand out, her fingers splayed. “From what I remember, you’re supposed to put it on my finger with the bottom of the heart pointed toward my wrist.” She turned to her grandma who nodded her approval.
Without question, I did as she said; all the while, my heart was pounding out of my chest. The ring fit her dainty finger perfectly. As her grandma watched on, Teagan took the other ring, swallowed hard, and slid it on to my right ring finger. The ring fit my finger perfectly as well.
Teagan looked back over at her grandma, whose eyelids were getting heavier by the second. She kissed her on the forehead and whispered, “Sweet dreams, Nanna.”
Once we were in my car, Teagan sat in silence, trying not to cry. I didn’t know what had happened in there, and I didn’t know what to say to her. All I knew was we were both wearing rings that held great meaning, which had upset Teagan to the point of crying.
“Teagan, say something, please. Do you want me to take the ring off?”
She shook her head and twisted the ring on her own finger as she stared down at it.
I finally looked at the ring on my finger. It was gold, and on the top of the band, two hands held a heart between them. There was a small crown on the top edge of the heart. I had never seen a ring like it before. The details of the ring were worn down by age, so I knew it was old. Teagan’s ring looked much the same, but hers was very feminine, whereas mine was masculine.
“Do you want to talk about what went on in there?”
“Yes, we need to. Let’s do it at home, though,” she said.
I loved the sound of that.
Teagan shifted in her seat, angling her body toward me. “Do you mind if we go back to the conversation we had on the way over? I kind of want to get that out of the way before we talk about what just happened with Nanna.”
I nodded so she went back to asking questions.
“You mentioned repercussions and changes earlier. What did you mean?” she asked.
“When I went to the hospital to see Hannah for the first time, Zoey was alone in the room with her. She looked like she was at peace for the first time in her life—Z hasn’t had it easy like the rest of us. She forced me to hold Hannah. She was so little and sweet,” I said, remembering how tiny she was and how she took right to me. “That’s why I call her Sweet Pea. Anyway, Z had been bugging me to settle down for months. Andy came in later, and I held Hannah while they ate dinner. They were always off in their own little world, but when Hannah was born, everything became right for them. Does that make sense?”
“Yes, it does,” she replied. “It’s like they weren’t complete until she came along.”
“Exactly,” I agreed. “When it was time for me to go, all three of them were on Zoey’s hospital bed . . . I don’t know, the way they were together made me realize I do want that for my life.” I paused, and I knew what I had to say next could possibly hurt Teagan. “Then I left, things happened with Cammie. A few days later, I called her and we were together for a while. I knew all along she wasn’t right for me, and I’d finally had enough of her that night at Dub’s, so I broke it off.”
“Why did you think she wasn’t right for you?” she asked.
I didn’t think long about my response. “Because she’s shallow, self-centered, fake, and we had almost nothing in common.”
“Why were you with her for so long if you had nothing in common?”
Her gaze shifted to me and I couldn’t say the words because I hadn’t even admitted the reason to myself. I’d stayed with her for sex, plain and simple. The realization hit Teagan when I didn’t immediately respond.
“Oh. Never mind. I get it.” She looked down and twisted the ring around her finger.
“Teagan, that’s not what I want from you. It’s not like that with you,” I admitted, hoping she didn’t think I was a total pig.
“Then what is it like, Jeremy?” she asked, her voice monotone and uncertain.
Jesus, she wasn’t holding anything back and I felt like I was being put through the wringer.
“Everything feels different when I’m with you. I want to do it all the right way . . . that is, if you plan to give me a chance after this weekend. I’m not perfect and I’ve never claimed to be, but I need to make sure I don’t screw this up by doing something stupid.”
This discussion was draining me dry, and I was wondering why people went through all the pain and suffering to be together when this shit was so hard. The outcome had to be worth the emotional risk I was taking, right? Honestly, I wasn’t sure as the depression and uncertainty I was feeling about my future was freaking me the fuck out.
Teagan sat in silence until I pulled into the garage
at my house. We got out of the car and she walked over to the Chevelle. “What happened to your car? Did you crash it?”
“It’s not mine. It’s Zoey’s. This is what she was talking about on the phone the day you came to see me. Her ex-husband did it. She hadn’t seen it until right before you came over.”
Teagan frowned and let out a frustrated breath. She reached out and touched the dented fender of the car almost as if she didn’t believe it was really there.
“I’m so freaking stupid,” she whimpered as she rubbed over her eyes with the back of her hands. “Jeremy, I’m so sorry . . . for everything.” She came over to me and hugged me. “Can we relax in the pool? This has already been a long day and it’s not even noon yet.”
She tilted her head back and looked me in the eyes. She seemed tired and stressed, and I would do anything to ease her constant worry. If I could take it all away forever, I would.
“Yes, we can do anything you want.” I leaned in to kiss her on the cheek but she turned so my lips landed on hers.
Neither of us moved, or tried to intensify the kiss. We didn’t need to. It was simple, and natural, and perfect.
After going inside the house, we went our separate ways to change. As I was changing into my swim shorts, I thought about our conversations throughout the morning.
She had no reason to be apologizing to me. Her harassment at work was because of me and I hated the toll it was taking on her. I’d tell Cammie to leave her alone, but my guess was that would only make things worse.
I found Teagan already outside, with the pool net in her hands, skimming a few leaves from the surface of the water. She wore her sundress over her swimsuit. She was barefoot and beautiful, and seemed perfectly at home.
