by Linda Bridey
Lacey looked between the now empty hallway and the two men. “What’s going on here?”
“Come on in here, honey,” Joe said. “We’ll explain. Won’t we, Jr.?”
Lacey knew by their expressions that she wasn’t going to like what they had to tell her.
Chapter Five
Devon tied her horse to the hitching post outside of the hospital and stood in the cold October air, gathering her courage as she stood looking at the large, two-story brick building. The facility boasted twenty patient rooms, a small cafeteria, and several administration and physician offices. Two operating rooms were located on the top floor, each with skylights to utilize the natural light during the day, thus saving on electricity, which was a great convenience for performing emergency surgeries at night.
In addition to the three Samuels doctors and Ben, there were now two other doctors: Victoria Wyman was a general practitioner and Lyle Danforth was a newly graduated surgeon. Several other nurses besides Hannah also worked there.
“What are you doing here?” Devon mumbled. “This isn’t a good idea.” She almost got back on her horse with the basket of sugar and chocolate chip cookies she’d asked the Dwyer’s cook and long-time family friend, Cora, to bake.
Then she decided that she was going to deliver them regardless of whether or not he was unpleasant again. Walking into the hospital, she asked Marlene, the nurse on duty, which room Sawyer was in. She steeled herself as she looked in his half-open doorway. He was sleeping.
Stepping quietly into the room, a rush of emotion hit her as she gazed at him. His light brown hair was mussed, giving him a boyish appearance, and his face was relaxed in slumber. She knew that under his sleeping shirt he was muscular and powerful, his body honed by years of hunting, wrestling, and ranch work. She’d seen him in everything from suits to breechcloths over the years and he looked equally good in all of them.
They were closed, but she knew how entrancing those warm brown eyes of his could be when they were laughing or darkened with desire. Her body remembered the way his hands had touched her and the taste of his kisses. They’d never made love, but they’d come close plenty of times.
After he’d left for boot camp, there were times when she’d wished that she’d given herself to him, even just once. Other times she was glad she hadn’t, knowing that it would have hurt so much more if she’d experienced that sort of intimacy with him and then lost him. When he’d enlisted, there hadn’t been any draft. He’d gone voluntarily and she hadn’t been able to understand how he could leave her when he didn’t have to.
He’d tried to explain to her that he’d felt called and that it didn’t mean he didn’t love her or want her. He’d said that it was just something he had to do. While a part of her had been proud of him, her heart had been deeply wounded to know that the army was more important to him than her.
Anger and pain had fueled her decision to end their relationship. He’d wanted to get married before he’d left, but she couldn’t stand the thought of marrying him only to possibly become a widow before a year was up. They’d quarreled bitterly about it and had come to an impasse, neither one backing down. The relationship had crumbled, leaving them both brokenhearted.
Moving further into the room, she set the basket on the small dresser in the room and turned to leave, not wanting to disturb him. He stirred, opening his eyes. They focused on her and his eyebrows drew together.
“Devon? What are you doing here?”
Her nerves jangled a little. “I, um, brought you some cookies from Cora. She made your favorites.”
Sawyer smiled a little. “Tell her I said thanks.”
“I will. Did the surgery go well?”
He sat up a little straighter. “Yeah. Ben said it wasn’t as bad as he thought it would be. He’s letting me go home Saturday.”
Her smile made his heart skip a couple of beats. “I’m so glad. You’ll be able to go back overseas once you’re healed then.”
His face tensed. “I doubt it. It was a very short career. You wouldn’t have had much to worry about.” No one but his parents and Skip knew that he’d been officially discharged.
His barbed comment hit its mark and her cheeks burned as her temper rose. “Why do you have to be so confrontational? I’m trying to be civil.”
“Why bother? Why do you care what happens to me? You couldn’t be rid of me fast enough a year and a half ago.”
“That’s not fair! You know exactly why it didn’t work out between us,” she said, coming closer to him.
“Yeah, I do. Because you couldn’t stand the thought of being married to a soldier. You weren’t willing to support me while I was away,” Sawyer said. “I’m glad you found someone who won’t be called up. I’m sure that’s a relief to you. So when’s the wedding?”
His bitter attitude turned her anger into fury. “How would you have felt if the tables were turned? You weren’t a soldier when we first began seeing each other. Then all of a sudden, you wanted to go into the army and leave me behind. There was no draft yet. You didn’t have to go.”
“What’s the difference of whether I enlisted voluntarily or if I’d been drafted?”
Her blue eyes reflected her pain. “Because you wouldn’t have had a choice! If you loved me so much, how could you choose to leave me? How could you marry me and then leave me right away? Just so you had someone to warm your bed when you came back? It would be convenient for you to have a wife already, someone sitting at home pining for you. Was that what you were thinking?”
“Of course not! I tried to explain it to you, but you just wouldn’t listen. You were too damn selfish instead of thinking of our country. I knew war was coming. Somehow, someway, we were gonna get involved. I wanted to go on my own terms and get into the branch I wanted to be in. I didn’t want to be randomly assigned. If I was going to war, I was gonna have a say in how I served!”
Devon snorted. “Well, I appreciate the insults. Enjoy the cookies. I won’t bother you anymore. Goodbye, Sawyer.”
Sawyer almost called her back and then thought better of it. What was the point? They’d never see eye-to-eye on the situation and it didn’t matter anymore. She was seeing Teddy and he had enough on his plate right now with recovering and then figuring out what he was going to do for a living.
He needed to move on with his life. The problem was that his heart wasn’t getting the message. Sawyer sank back against his pillows, forcing his mind from the beautiful woman who still held his heart.
*****
Organized chaos, as Randall called it, ruled at the Dwyers’ during supper than night, Lacey watched her two youngest children push their food around on their plates. She knew why Joey was out of sorts and she had a good idea why Devon was upset. Tim, their older brother, on the other hand, laughed and carried on like usual, harassing the other people at the large table.
Her heart hurt for her children, especially when there wasn’t much she could do to help them. As angry as she still was at Joey, she felt badly that Snow Song had broken up with him. She hated that he was in that sort of pain.
Lacey was one of the lucky few people in the world who’d found their soulmate. She and Joe had married after knowing each other only for four days, and had fallen in love shortly afterwards. They’d been together ever since and had only had one rough patch that had threatened their marriage. Looking over at Joe, who had just thrown a piece of chicken at Chester’s wife, Letty, a green-eyed blonde, she thanked God yet again for her husband.
He was a rare man in the extent of generosity he exhibited in every facet of his life. He gave so much of his time to everyone, but most of all to his family and friends, which encompassed much of the town since Joe considered a great many people his family or friends. He donated money wherever it was needed and spent time fighting with the government, military, or other local officials to make things better for Dawson.
“Jasmine, sweetheart,” he said in a strange voice that was a little higher than normal.
Their eight-year-old granddaughter’s hazel eyes found him. “What, Pappy?” she asked, twirling a piece of black hair in her fingers.
“Did you forget to shut the door on Percy’s cage?” he asked.
Her dark brows puckered. “I don’t think so. Why?”
“Because I’m pretty sure I have a ferret in my pants.”
Several people choked, either on their drink or a bite of food, and laughter filled the spacious dining room. Jasmine, named for Joe’s deceased mother, ducked under the table, crawling across the floor to Joe. Sure enough, her albino ferret, Percy, was crawling up the inside of Joe’s pant leg.
The ferret had been a present from Rick Westlake, a family friend. Joe hated anything that resembled a rat. Rick, who raised unusual animals, was aware of his fear. He and Joe had a somewhat contentious relationship because Rick enjoyed torturing Joe with his ferret, Curtis IV. While Rick was sarcastic with most people, Joe was one of his main targets.
Joe had clamped his hand around his knee, cutting off the critter’s progress up his leg. Jasmine giggled and got ahold of Percy. Retrieving him, she scooted out from under the table.
“Sorry, Pappy,” she said, also aware of Joe’s aversion to ferrets.
When Joe’s kids had been little, he hadn’t been able to discipline them and he was even more tender-hearted with his grandkids, so he didn’t yell at her. “That’s ok, honey. Just make sure his door is shut from now on, ok?”
Jasmine gave him a gap-toothed smile. “Ok, Pappy. C’mon, Percy. Back in your cage, you bad ferret. Shame on you for scaring Pappy that way,” she scolded the ferret, walking from the dining room.
Joe let out the breath he’d been holding and the laughter resumed. Devon laughed along with the rest, but when the hilarity died down, she excused herself. She put on Kyle’s heavy, wool sweater she’d made him give her before he’d gone to war and went out to the veranda, sitting in one of the chaise lounges. Normally, she would have stayed until supper was through because it was like attending an informal party every night, but her current mood was anything but fun-minded.
She knew that Teddy wouldn’t be over that night since he had a library meeting and they usually ran late. As she looked up at the stars, she chuckled at the thought of the tough, funny rancher being on the library committee. She’d only been seeing Teddy for four months, not being able to entertain the idea of dating anyone again until then.
He’d worn her down with his sense of humor and thoughtful gestures and she’d finally given in. Since his family was also close with the Samuels, he’d known about her and Sawyer’s breakup and had waited for several months before approaching her. He’d let her set the pace of their relationship, which was also thoughtful. Teddy was a good, intelligent man with a kind heart, and she enjoyed spending time with him, but she didn’t love him.
Teddy’s integral part in his family’s successful ranch guaranteed that he wouldn’t be going into the military, even though he’d tried to enlist. The army had decided that he was needed more in Dawson. It was only one reason that Devon wished that she could fall in love with Teddy, but she knew she never would.
Why did she still love the bitter man she’d visited in the hospital? Why couldn’t her heart let him go?
She heard the sunroom door open and shut.
“Feel like some company?” Lacey asked, joining her.
“Sure, Mama.”
Lacey pulled another wooden lounge chair close to hers and sat down, stretching her legs out in front of her. Looking at her profile, Devon thought she was still such a beautiful woman with her dark hair and pretty brown eyes. Her figure was slim from all of the active work she did training horses and the faint laugh lines around her mouth only emphasized the fact that she’d had so much fun in her life. Of course, it was hard not to have fun living with Joe and their crazy family.
“Mama, do you and Daddy ever fight?”
Lacey smiled. “You must’ve been reading my mind earlier.”
“What do you mean?”
“During supper I was thinking about how Joe and I hardly ever fight. A little ways into our marriage it almost ended, but ever since we worked things out, we’ve never fought like that again. We have little squabbles about things, but nothing serious,” Lacey said.
“What happened?” Devon asked.
“Well, you already know how nasty his father was. After he had someone set fire to our barns, Joe was furious and grief-stricken—the fire killed five of our horses, including Lance, his pride and joy. He wanted revenge in the worst way. For about a month after the fire, he would hardly go anywhere because he was so afraid there would be another fire.
“So I organized a surprise party here at the house for him. A bunch of us pulled it off, too. He had no idea that all of those people were coming. He was so surprised and we had such a good time—until he decided to sneak away in the middle of the party to go to Texas to confront August.”
“He didn’t.”
“He did. I was beyond furious. A little while after he’d left I found out that I was pregnant.”
“With Emily?”
Lacey shook her head a little. “No, with our first baby. I had a miscarriage.”
“Oh, Mama. I’m so sorry,” Devon said, touching Lacey’s arm.
“Thank you, honey. It still hurts a little sometimes, but then I look at all of you kids and I know that God gave us all of you to make it up to us,” Lacey said. “I lost the baby before Joe got back and I was so devastated and angry with him for not being here when I needed him the most. It was a little unfair to him because he hadn’t known before he left that I was expecting, but I was still devastated.”
Devon squeezed her hand. “I can only imagine.”
“When he returned, I didn’t want anything to do with him and I moved out of our room. I’d started training horses while he was gone and I wasn’t going to stop just because he’d come back. I was determined to live my own life and he could live his.
“He kept trying to apologize and make it up me, but I didn’t believe that he’d ever change from the selfish, womanizing, gambler and be someone I could count on. I wasn’t trying to force him to change. I just loved him so much that I’d hoped that he’d want our marriage to be a real one, not in name only.”
“How did you make up?” Devon asked, the idea of her parents splitting up bringing tears to her eyes.
“Well, you know your father. He doesn’t give up easily. Look at how strong-minded he was about getting electricity. He was determined to win me back—to show me that he meant it when he said he loved me. Remember me telling you about Polly?”
“Yeah. She was your first horse.”
“That’s right. When I first moved here, I missed her so much. Joe went back to Walhalla, my home town, and bought her from my father. He never told Amos who he was, though, because he never wanted him to track me down here,” Lacey said.
Devon said, “Too bad he hadn’t come here so Daddy could shoot him for being abusive to you.”
Lacey laughed. “He would have, but then he’d have gone to jail. While he was in Amos’ house, Joe asked to use the washroom. He snuck into my room and grabbed things that he thought I’d like to have. He told me he’d have brought more, but there was only so much he could hide in his pants.”
Devon laughed with Lacey over that. “I can just see Daddy shoving jewelry and stuff down his pants.”
Lacey grinned. “When he came back, he hid Polly in the barn and slipped a note under my bedroom door. It said that there was someone in the barn to see me. I couldn’t imagine what he was up to, but I was too curious not to go find out. I couldn’t believe that she was here. He knew that other than Jamie and Sammi, Polly was my best friend.
“It amazed me that he’d traveled all the way to North Dakota to get her for me. He wrote me the most wonderful letter, telling me how sorry he was and how much he loved me. He said that if I’d just give him another chance I’d never regret it, and I never have.
I’m a very lucky woman.”
“And I am a very lucky man,” Joe said, startling them as he came out onto the veranda. “I didn’t mean to eavesdrop, but I heard your story and, well, ok, so I was eavesdropping. You caught me.”
He had Devon scoot over and then sat down by her, putting an arm around her. “You see, your mama is a very special woman. She’s the most beautiful woman I know, she makes me laugh, and she doesn’t let me get away with anything, which I need. She’s got the biggest heart and she’s got a lot of patience to have been able to put up with me all of these years.”
“I’m so sorry about your baby,” Devon said.
Joe blew out a breath. “Me, too. But, I guess God had a reason for it. Maybe to make me wake up and grow up. Whether or not that was His reason, it did both. I’d lost a baby, but I wasn’t gonna lose the woman I loved without a fight. So I dug in my heels and worked hard to make up all the ground I’d lost with her.
“I’m glad that I’m so stubborn because now we’re happy as clams with all of you kids and our family. And you’re right: I wasn’t gonna stop until I got us electricity. We might only have three electric lights in the house, but that’s more than we had before. And now we have a telephone, too!”
Lacey and Devon looked at each other and laughed.
“See?” Lacey said. “He’s got a one-track mind when he gets an idea in his head.”
Joe grinned. “That’s right.”
They grew quiet a moment and Devon said, “I went to see Sawyer today. I asked Cora to make some cookies to take to him.”
“You did?” Lacey asked.
“How did it go?” Lacey asked.
“Terrible. He’s still angry with me. I don’t know why I went. I shouldn’t have. We fought again. Why can’t I just let it alone?”
Lacey said, “I think you know the answer to that, honey.”
Devon groaned. “I don’t want to love him. I want to be over him so I can move on.”
Joe sighed and rubbed her arm. “That’s the problem with you kids growing up. I kept tellin’ y’all to stay little, but none of you would listen to me. Now here you are, all grown up, and I can’t kiss away the hurt like I could when you were little and had a booboo. If I could, I would. Now, I don’t mean to pry, but it sounds like you’re not in love with Teddy.”
