“I appreciate how you and your team handled everything with such discretion,” Fionola said. “Should the opportunity occur, know you’ll always be welcome here.”
“Thank you. Now Dr. Matthews, may I accompany you to your hospital? I’d like to see the horse.”
“Certainly. Fee, do you still want to stay here?”
“I do. Tyndal ran to look at Pyralis, then she’ll be back. I told the barn manager to have his crew remove every trace of anything that’s not original to the farm throughout all the barns and to cover each stall with fresh straw. The apples, carrot sticks, and treats have all been destroyed. Tyndal said she intended to close Pyralis in his stall and have a groom stay with him. Haven’t heard anything since.”
Seth nodded. “Smart. The last thing we need is for him to injure a hoof with the way he’s acted. I’ll take a look at him after I finish at the hospital.”
Fionola turned to him. “I know what you’re doing. You’re coddling me and not doing what you need to do. I told Jared I don’t appreciate it, now I’ll tell you. That horse of Sasha’s can’t do one thing about the situation he’s in. We don’t even know if he’ll ever stand again, much less walk. I know your staff is good and all that, but you should be there.”
He drew Fionola close for a fierce hug. “Mind what I said, woman. Don’t get sick again.”
“You mind Sasha’s horse. I’m fine.”
“She’s fine.” Seth grinned at Uri. “Can you believe that? It must be in their genes. The Morgan women are all stubborn.”
“I’d say that applies to women in general.”
“Exactly what applies to women?” Seth turned toward the unfamiliar voice. “Uri, you ought to know better than say a word on the subject. You’re just a man and know nothing of the complexities of being female.
“Dr. Matthews, Fionola.” Uri smiled. “Allow me to introduce Monika Toslo, the Captain of the Russian Equestrian delegation. She arrived yesterday and missed meeting you at the Social.”
“Welcome to Morgan’s Walk. I’m sorry it’s under such difficult circumstances,” Fee said.
“Circumstances that should never have happened. I am deeply embarrassed about the actions and behavior of a fellow countryman. I’m even more ashamed that she was part of my team and that I entrusted a champion Thoroughbred into her care. Dr. Matthews, may I also join you?”
“Sure.” Seth nodded at Fee and started for his truck. “I’m anxious to know what’s going on myself.”
Seth’s office manager met them at the hospital. While he reviewed the test results, she gave their guests a brief tour of the facility. Classrooms, surgical suites, several stalls with patients inside, each one having students that cared for them. Within moments, she led them to an examination room where Seth studied a series of x-rays.
“See this?” Seth explained what he saw, then looked at Uri. “Sasha said she wanted him put down. I don’t agree, but he’s not my horse.”
“He’s not Sasha’s horse either, and we most certainly don’t agree,” the Captain said. “She is merely the rider and while he remains in your hospital, we’ll continue to assume the cost for his care. We also understand the nature of this injury and will respect whatever decision you make. If he lives, we hope he’s without pain.” Monika paused, looked at the x-rays once more, then pulled out a large file from her briefcase. “When he arrived at Morgan’s Walk, this horse was a magnificent animal, a champion of Russia. What Sasha has done to him is part of what I’ll personally see that she regrets. If we could impose upon your kindness once more, please give this to Tyndal.”
She placed the file and an envelope with Tyndal’s name on it in Seth’s hand.
“I’ll see she gets it,” Seth promised.
****
Jared awakened intensely aware of Tyndal’s presence. The dizzying fog was gone, but the exhaustion wasn’t. He studied the IV lines, the array of machines that monitored his system, and the waterfall of dark hair spilling across his shirt where Tyndal slept.
No wonder her scent was close. He stroked her hair. At his touch, she sighed, nuzzled deeper against his chest. Since he couldn’t think of anything better to do, he grinned and joined her in dreams.
“Mrs. Morgan, I hoped you’d return.” The doctor attending Jared met Fionola with a pleased smile on his face. “We’ve checked on him frequently and he’s doing fine. I thought you’d want to see this.”
They stood at the corner of the privacy screen the doctor placed earlier. Jared slept with his arm wrapped around Tyndal’s shoulder; she held his hand.
“They’ve been asleep ever since she came in.”
“I think these two have survived on caffeine and nerves,” Fionola explained.
“We figured as much. But Jared needs to move around. I’d like to know how he does during the next few hours, if his system stays normal. We don’t often deal with something like what we’ve had to today. Keno’s lab has provided us with information throughout the day.” The doctor turned toward his patient. “I hate to wake him up.”
“I’m awake,” Jared murmured. “She’s not though.” He opened his eyes, met Fionola’s. “Give us a minute, will you? We won’t be long.”
“Sure,” the doctor said. “Come when you’re ready. We’ll meet you outside. Just let me get you unhooked from everything first.” When he finished, he put a small patch over the IV site on Jared’s arm. “I’d advise you to move slowly, call me if you feel dizzy or nauseous. When you stand, you may want to let her help you.”
“I’ll make it, doc,” Jared said. “She’s out cold though.” His eyes softened as he looked at Tyndal.
“Like I said, take your time.” The doctor read Jared’s expression too, and smiled. “Now, Mrs. Morgan”—he turned to Fionola—“would you care to share an iced tea with me?”
“I’d be delighted.”
As they moved away, Jared tapped Tyndal on the shoulder.
“Hmm?” She took a long breath. “Oh, hi. You’re back.” She smiled softly. “You look so much better. I’ve missed you.” She started to straighten, to move away from the nest she’d made on Jared’s chest.
In response, he tightened his arms around her, pulled her closer. “Be still, love. You owe me a kiss.”
“What for? How do you figure that? What are you talking about?” She brushed the hair back from her face.
“Rent.”
“What?”
He pointed to his chest where she’d slept. “Rent.” He laughed and claimed her lips in a deep kiss.
****
No one, especially him, objected when Fionola said everyone was to meet at the house for a late supper. Jared wanted to sleep, preferably with Tyndal curled on his chest until Fee rang the dinner bell, but Tyndal had other ideas. She was more interested in checking on the horses.
He slept anyway and felt almost human when he went downstairs for dinner. Seth was at the sideboard pouring a glass of wine for Fionola and Tyndal.
“You look better. Hi, love.” Tyndal took his hand. “The doc said you’re to drink lots of water, eat, and go back to bed. Tomorrow you can do what you want.”
“I think I can handle that.”
She handed him a cold glass.
“So, what all have I missed? I don’t remember much of today.”
“No, I’m sure you don’t,” Fee said. “Seth has Sasha’s horse, she’s gone. And apparently there’s some some paperwork for Tyndal. Did you bring it with you?” She took the glass of wine Seth offered and smiled. “Riesling. My favorite.”
“I know. She already has it.”
Tyndal held up a large manila envelope. “I can’t imagine what it is.”
“Well, are you going to look at it?”
Seth smiled. “They asked me to give it to you and didn’t explain its contents.” He sank into a cushion on the sofa beside Fee.
“Okay, okay.” She tore open the letter first. “It starts with greetings, and an apology. Some information about the Russian Team, a
nd…” She paused, looked up, her voice went soft when she added, “I don’t believe this. They’ve relinquished all rights to the horse.” Silent, she read through another set of papers. “This”—she held up the file—“contains his health certificate, his registration. The horse’s name is Gregor. I like that.” She paused, still reading. “They’re going to send me a formal letter of agreement when they get home.”
“Do you have breeding rights?” Fionola asked.
“Yes, apparently I do. It’s an absolute consignment. No restrictions, other than we can never sell him. They go on to say he was foaled in St. Petersburg.” She paused, smiled. “Here, let me read it to you in their words. ‘Miss Morgan, we hope our son of Russian royalty recovers well enough that one day he finds a new home at Morgan’s Walk. He shares the bloodline of horses bred for kings and Cossacks, czars, and emperors who demanded perfection to compete on the world’s stage. Unfortunately, Gregor will never appear again on that stage, but perhaps one day a son or daughter of his will. We wish you the best with him.’ ” Tyndal’s eyes glowed. “They just gave us Sasha’s horse. That means you have to get him well again.” She smiled at Seth.
“He’s a strong horse, honey, but with his injuries, he’ll need to be. I told Fee I have hope. That’s the best I can give you.”
Tyndal knew she had to be satisfied. It was the practical answer. But she remembered how she felt when she watched the great, powerful horse move. “He’s not going to die, is he?”
Seth frowned, sipped his tea. “No, I don’t think he’ll die. But he’s got to be able to live with what’s happened, and heal. It’ll take time. We’re doing everything possible to get him through this.”
“I know. I’m sorry. It’s just…”
“It’s just that Gregor is beautiful and strong and looks fantastic. But you understand the difficulties with injuries like his. Trust me to take care of him.”
Seth didn’t say the horse wouldn’t die. She looked at Jared, and saw the fatigue in his face. Some of his normal color was back. Still, she knew how close it’d been. After getting Pyralis settled in his stall, she’d raced back to the tent, desperate to know what was happening. For a man so vital, with so much energy, it was tough to see him motionless, his face sheet-pale, and the IV’s pumping fluids into him. She hated hospital field tents; she hated stone and mortar ones just as much. She hated the smells, the machines that blinked and beeped, and the fear that crept through the halls. Death felt like a living creature on the prowl, wanting to feed. She hated the silent, compassionate looks from the medical staff.
Her father died in one. They said her daddy went to heaven to be with her mother.
Then Chase. They said his big heart finally gave out. Whatever words they used, however they tried to soften it, the message was the same.
They said Fionola needed rest, but…
Now Jared?
They said so much. But one truth they couldn’t deny.
Life was fragile. Breakable as china.
“You can go to him now.” A medic with an easy smile added, “If you’re ready.”
Of course she wanted to see him. She loved him. Heart and soul, she loved him. So why did she feel a sudden urge to run? To run away and hide?
He could have died.
Did they know that?
She’d sat on a folding canvas chair and brushed the hair back from his forehead. “Hi, love,” she whispered, softly.
Why did everyone whisper in hospitals anyway?
She wanted to scream. “No! No more death. No more dying. No more.” And that included Gregor.
But Jared’s lips curved at her touch. Briefly he opened his eyes and lifting her hand, he shifted it to his mouth, grazed the inside of her wrist with his lips. Then he rested it, palm over his heart, and closed his eyes. He said so much without saying a word.
Love might be real, she was learning just how real it was, but so was terror. Even the idea of safety was an illusion. Maybe the concept offered comfort, security systems all promised safety and sanctuary, but when it came down to a heartbeat, all the security in the world was an illusion. Like the old phrase, “Nobody ever gets out of this life alive.”
So while life lasted, was love enough?
Was it?
Chapter Twelve
The following morning, Tyndal fiddled and puttered with Bhetami, then moved to Bahadur. Since he’d been weaned, he had his own stall. Not that it mattered. He’d still try to kick the side out if he was bored. “Move, brat. No teeth.” The rules hadn’t changed. He broke them with pride.
“Seth was right. You are just like your daddy.” She slipped the halter Jared gave her over his head and led him to the small, indoor arena. The black colt was almost as tall as Raj, with his gangly, long legs. Utterly convinced the world was his domain. In a few years, it probably would be. He had champion written all over him. And so far, the only person he’d give token obedience to was her. She made him stand, walk on a loose lead. Practice what he’d have to do at the Symphony later that evening. She went through the motions, her mind went in circles.
Was love enough?
How could anyone know for sure?
She put Bahadur in his stall, called for Jake, and went up to Chase’s grave. Fee’s roses still bloomed. Maybe a person with more faith would pray.
For sure, the word horrible described the last few days. She felt like a ball that bounced back and forth from one crisis to another. Bahadur. Fionola. Jared. Sasha. Gregor. Bounce. Bounce. Bounce.
So wasn’t it okay to hit the wall?
“I can’t bounce anymore.” She looked at Jake.
He was asleep.
She was almost jealous. Wouldn’t it be something to feel so confident, so carefree that she could lie down in the sun, in the middle of the night, lie down anytime beside the person she loved most in the world and go to sleep? Within a few more hours, the Classic would be finished for the year. At least she had a reasonable expectation of surviving the Symphony. Then life could go back to normal.
Whatever that was.
Was this how a woman in love was supposed to feel? What about all those spun-sugar feelings, dreams, and fantasies?
Jake stirred, opened his eyes.
“Go back to sleep, I’m not done worrying yet.”
“What are you worrying about?” Jared stood between her and the sun. “Hey, love, I thought you might be here.”
****
He dropped beside her, sat, and stroked her hair. Waited. If she wanted to talk, he’d listen. If she needed silence, he’d share it. From what he saw in her eyes, he wasn’t sure what she’d choose. He gave Jake a rub; the big dog stretched, turned into the sun, and slept. On a hot afternoon, the idea was tempting.
Just not that afternoon. They shared silence, but not quiet.
“You can tell me, you know.”
“I’m not sure that I can, Jared.”
He noticed she looked anywhere but at him. Once before she’d closed herself off. When Chase died. Was she doing the same again? He cupped her chin, turned her face toward him, waited until she met his eyes.
“Want to go to Jamaica?”
“Jamaica? Where’d that come from?”
He grinned. “A few years ago I bought a place close to the beach. The house sits on a hill, overlooks the bay. It has a small barn, Pyralis likes to splash in the ocean. When it felt like everybody had a piece of me and all I was doing was one show after another, I’d go there and ride for miles. Maybe it was therapy.”
“Sounds ideal. And I get it. I don’t know if riding for miles would help. But if it could, I can do that here. You had the beach. We have the prairie.” She shrugged, pulled away from him. “It’s stuff inside”—she tapped her chest—“I have to figure out. Until I do, I think I’ll stay home. Does that make sense?”
“Home is familiar. There’s comfort in what we know. Everyone you love is here. Tyndal, it makes perfect sense.” He traced his fingers along her face; she didn’t lean into his
hand. Yesterday she would have. Yesterday, before Sasha and her last jab at Morgan’s Walk. “I’ll leave you to your thoughts, love.” There were times when it was appropriate to encourage a person to talk, to share what bothered them. He didn’t feel the time was right for Tyndal. Too much confusion in her eyes, she was too tired.
“No, wait. I’ll go back with you. I have to get ready for the Symphony.” She pulled a hand through her hair. “I just feel flat, you know?”
“Stress and fatigue might be part of it. When was the last time you slept through a whole night? Give yourself time, love. We’ve ridden a whirlwind these last few days.”
“Yeah. That’s part of it. I don’t know if that’s all. Or if it’s that simple.”
He studied her face, the sag in her shoulders. “Tyndal, there’s no way I’d suggest anything you think is simple.” He grinned, smoothed the hair back from her face.
She managed to smile up at him. “Wisdom.”
“I don’t know that it is, sweetheart. I feel like you’re behind a wall that’s beyond my reach right now. I’d scale it if I could, but I think you’d rather struggle with whatever’s troubling you on your own.”
She nodded. “I think I have to. Something’s changed, and I have to figure it out.”
“That’s life, though. Part of what makes us who we are is how we move through change and keep our balance.” He stood, held out a hand to help her to her feet. “Fee should be back at the house by now. She and Raj had a part in the closing ceremonies this morning. I want to check in with her and then take Pyralis out. I understand he did all the work yesterday.”
“He was impossible. Magnificent. Nobody was going to touch him in the jump off; it was like he knew he had to win. But he gave us all fits trying to keep him under control when we pulled you off. He scared the doc to death when he tried to tear into the tent.”
“Fee told me he put on quite a show. It’s been him and me for a long time and he thinks he’s family.”
“Sure. The doc, after he caught his breath, asked why Pyralis acted the way he did. I explained it’s one thing to love a horse, but something else entirely to be loved by one. And Pyralis adores you. He had every intention of being in the tent with you.”
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