by Vivian Wood
Aubrey laughed at his temerity.
“Is that right? You bears are all just big, godly men meant to be worshiped?” she asked.
“Hey, hey. I’m just talking looks and size here. And I think you might remember a little bit about that, huh?” Luke asked, his eyes darkening as he gazed down at her. Luke pulled her flush against his body, pressing the long, thick length of his erection against her through their clothes, as if there was any way she’d forgotten.
Aubrey’s mouth dropped open, but for the life of her she couldn’t come up with a decent response to that. Her cheeks burned, too, because he was more right than he knew. Aubrey remembered exactly how impressive his cock was, and all the ways he’d used it to make her cry out his name, over and over.
“Wow, I can’t believe I just managed to get the better of you,” Luke said.
“Yeah, well. Don’t get used to it, buddy,” Aubrey said.
“Mmmhm. Well, you know what I could get used to?” Luke asked.
“I’m afraid to ask,” Aubrey said, her breath hitching as her body brushed against Luke’s again.
Luke stopped moving in the middle of the dance floor, one hand at her waist and the other coming up to cradle her head. He watched her intently, his eyes like emerald fire, warning her of his desire and giving her time to flee.
Aubrey let him tilt her head back, let her breasts crush against the firmness of his chest as he leaned down. Her eyelids fluttered closed of their own volition when she felt the heat of his breath fan over her lips, her tongue darting out to dampen them. Her heart thudded in her chest, the music pulsed all around them, and Luke’s body against hers seemed to still time.
The first brush of his lips was a tease, a question. Luke was asking for permission, something he’d never done back in San Francisco. Aubrey couldn’t have pulled away if she’d wanted to; her body and her bear yearned for Luke, and her heart was too full of sweet, hopeful butterflies.
So she went up on her tiptoes, bringing her mouth against Luke’s warm, firm lips, relishing the shudder that went through his body. That was encouragement enough for Luke, whose grip tightened on her body, fingers threading into her hair as his tongue traced the seam of her lips. They hung in the moment, suspended in a warm, safe bubble, as Aubrey’s lips parted under Luke’s explorations.
The moment that the tip of Aubrey’s tongue touched Luke’s, a spark caught between them. Suddenly Luke’s hands were everywhere at once, roaming her body just as hers did his. Her arms went around his neck, pulling him closer. Their lips and tongues danced and darted, moving in rhythm with each other and the music. Aubrey’s teeth caught and tugged Luke’s bottom lip, eliciting a deep growl of desire from him. She could feel the vibration from his chest, making her shiver. Making her bear rise to the surface, just as she knew Luke’s did.
They both sucked in breaths between kisses and nibbles, and Aubrey gave a long, loud moan when the heat of Luke’s mouth found a sensitive spot on her neck. In the back of her mind, she knew that people had to be watching them, but she couldn’t bring herself to care. One of Luke’s hands cupped her breast for a tantalizing moment before slipping down between them to press against her mound.
“Yes,” Aubrey breathed, knowing that Luke could hear her over the music. She melted against him, her need growing like an uncontrollable flame, threatening to burn her alive. She needed him naked, muscles straining, crying out as she rode his cock. She needed him to bend her over, spread her knees, and fuck her until she didn’t know her own name.
She needed—
Luke’s teeth scraped her neck, testing, and Aubrey pressed upward on her tiptoes. She needed everything that Luke could give her, every hot, pleasurable second of it, and she wanted it now, public be damned. Her bear knew what she needed, and she needed the bite.
Luke’s teeth brushed that spot again, the exact spot where Berserkers marked their mates, and something new and dark and hungry pulsed within Aubrey’s body. A need she’d never known before burned there, a desire that couldn’t be reined in. When Luke stiffened and paused, his mouth leaving her neck, Aubrey cried out and pounded her fist against his shoulder, unable to control her want.
“Aubrey, wait,” Luke said, his big hands coming up to shackle her wrists.
Aubrey’s eyes opened, and she stared up at him for an endless moment, balancing on the edge. She grappled with her desire, with her bear, as she slowly became aware of the situation.
“Shit!” Aubrey said, shaking off his touch and stepping back.
“Aubrey, I’m so sorry. I let things get out of control. I didn’t know it would be like that,” Luke said. Aubrey looked at him, really looked at him. His pupils were huge, his body trembling, and he sucked in ragged breaths. She’d provoked him, pushed him too far, and now he was hanging by a thread. And yet he’d still been the one to pull back, to stop them both from doing something foolish.
“It’s fine,” she said at last shaking her head.
“No, it’s just… I don’t want to rush you,” Luke said, reaching out for her hand. Aubrey avoided his touch shaking her head.
“No, I mean… there’s nothing to rush here. We’re just… you know, horny or whatever,” she said, growing flustered.
“Aubrey, it’s more than that. For me, at least.”
“Look, can we just go? It’s late, and I’ve probably had too much to drink,” Aubrey lied.
Luke’s eyes widened at the last, and Aubrey instantly felt bad for making him think that he’d taken advantage of her.
“I didn’t realize,” he uttered, shame blooming in his expression. “Of course we can go.”
In a matter of moments they were out on the darkened street, the fresh air creating a space between them like nothing else could have. Luke hailed a cab, his expression angry, but somehow Aubrey knew it wasn’t directed at her. Luke was nothing if not honorable, and he honestly thought he’d wronged her. It made her feel like a complete bitch, but she didn’t know how to take back her words.
A big yellow cab pulled up, and Aubrey climbed inside, trying to think of the right thing to say to him. To her surprise, Luke went around the other side and climbed in next to her.
“Uh… I can cab it by myself,” Aubrey said, confused.
“I’m not leaving you by yourself,” Luke scoffed.
“Really, I’m not even that tipsy. I’ll be fine,” Aubrey promised.
“Not happening,” Luke told her. He turned his attention to the driver and gave Aubrey’s address from memory, surprising her yet again.
The cab ride was quick and quiet, depositing them outside Aubrey’s apartment building in record time. Too soon for Aubrey’s lust-addled brain to have processed things and come up with something good to say. When Luke got out and ushered her out of the car, Aubrey expected him to wish her goodnight and be on his way.
Instead, he surprised her again by flat-out refusing her offer of cash for the fare and dismissing the cab.
“I can get into my house just fine,” she promised him.
Luke shot her a quelling look as he paid the cab driver, and Aubrey couldn’t help the goosebumps that broke out over her bare flesh as he followed her right up to the door of her apartment. His brooding expression was hard to interpret, some mix of self-condemnation and sense of duty and straight-up lust, if Aubrey had to guess.
“We need to talk, Aubrey. Invite me inside,” Luke commanded.
Aubrey took a second to soak in the masculine glory of him. He was so tall and muscular, with that gorgeous dark hair and those sexy blue-green eyes that hid just a hint of yellow at the center. Dressed in that tailored suit, he was a walking fantasy, and one she couldn’t pretend she didn’t want.
But fantasy or no fantasy, this was all happening for the wrong reasons. If Luke wouldn’t shut down this mating farce, Aubrey certainly would.
“We can talk right here,” Aubrey said, lifting her chin in an intentional gesture of defiance. Luke’s gaze narrowed, but he didn’t argue with her. He was
far too much of a gentleman, and of course he had his own pride besides that.
“I didn’t mean to move things too fast earlier,” Luke said. His frankness shouldn’t surprise her, Aubrey knew; he’d never been anything but forthright and open with her. Still, cutting right to the heart of an issue wasn’t easy, and she liked the honesty of it. She resolved to try to tell him how she really felt in turn.
“I could invite you in,” Aubrey said, wrapping her arms around herself and heaving a sigh. “I could pour us some wine, and we could chat for a minute, and then we could get naked, which I think is what we would both like right now. I could do that.”
Luke’s lips twitched, and she could tell he was picturing the scene just as she was. Aubrey steeled herself and continued, trying to cut out all the bullshit and save them both some trouble.
“But I’m not the two-night-stand type of girl, not like I was in San Francisco,” she explained.
Luke looked startled for a moment.
“I never thought of you like that, I swear,” he said.
“Well, there’s only two reasons for us to be standing here right now,” Aubrey said. “One, for a quick hookup. Two, to fall in line with this crazy mateship thing that the Alphas’ Council cooked up. And Luke, no matter how handsome and smart and funny you are, I’m not here for either of those. I like my life, I like the way things are. I’m not looking for some knight in shining armor to come rescue me, just like I’m not looking for meaningless sex.”
“And I don’t want that from you,” Luke said, his dark brows drawing down into a scowl.
Aubrey let out a groan of frustration.
“Look. You’ve made it clear that you… desire me. You tracked me down and hounded me for a date. You’re fulfilling your duty, just like all the other children of Alpha bears. I get that, believe me.”
“Are you saying that you only accepted my invitation because you’re fulfilling your duty?” Luke snapped. Aubrey could read the hurt in his expression, and though she regretted putting it there, she knew she had to push forward until he understood.
“Luke, I had a nice time. But I’m just not interested in being a tic on some checklist. I’m not taking a mate, and I’m not taking you to bed. Go find some other girl to meet your quota, okay?” Aubrey shot back, folding her arms.
Luke stared her down for several long seconds before shaking his head in disbelief.
“Honestly, Aubrey. I can’t decide whether your ego is massive or non-existent. You’re a complete mystery to me.”
“Yeah, well. Go figure someone else out. We’re done here,” Aubrey hissed. Though it killed her bear, she turned her back on him to unlock her apartment door and let herself inside. When she slammed it closed, she checked the peephole and caught his retreating figure as he stormed off through the parking lot.
Aubrey locked all three of her deadbolts, and gave a deep sigh.
“Excellent people skills, Ms. Umbridge,” she whispered to herself. She looked up at the clock on the foyer wall and realized that it was only 10:30, so she had a little time before she needed to head to bed. She needed a distraction.
“And for your reward… a glass of wine,” she said aloud.
Aubrey changed into a pair of soft flannel pajama pants and a soft white camisole, then poured herself a big glass of merlot and a big glass of ice water. She parked herself on the couch and leaned her head back, groaning as she replayed the night’s events. Her bear was anxious and lonely, her body still wound tight from Luke’s touch.
Had she just made a huge mistake?
Closing her eyes, Aubrey decided that she couldn’t worry about that now, because there was no different outcome to be had. Luke was amazing, but there were things she just couldn’t tell him. She’d agreed to one date to placate him, and she’d done that. Now she needed to get back to living her own life. After just a few sips of her wine, she let herself drift off.
21
Twelve
When Luke heard Aubrey’s footsteps approaching, he gave a sigh of relief. He stayed put, sitting on her doormat and waiting for her to appear. He wanted to get up and move around, shake some sensation into his legs, but he didn’t want to startle her unduly. She didn’t see him right away, and he had almost a full moment to simply admire her from afar.
Aubrey wore a simple knee-length black dress and a white cardigan. Her long hair was twined in an elegant braid that wrapped all the way around her head, making Luke’s fingers itch to unwind it so he could run his fingers through the soft strands. Her eyes were downcast as she walked, her expression solemn, but that didn’t take away from her beauty in the least.
When she was only a dozen feet away, she finally saw him and stopped dead in her tracks.
“Jesus H.—!” Aubrey screeched, nearly dropping the brown paper grocery bags she held in her arms.
Luke winced and raised a hand, giving her an awkward wave.
“Sorry. Hey,” he said.
“What the hell are you doing here?” Aubrey asked, giving him a scowl. Not the expression of pleasure he’d hoped for, honestly.
“Waiting for you,” he said with a shrug.
“Waiting for how long?” she asked.
“Uh…” Luke checked his watch. “Three hours.”
Aubrey stared at him for a long moment and then heaved a sigh.
“You’d better come in, I guess,” she said, maneuvering around him to unlock the door. Quick as a flash, Luke was on his feet and taking the grocery bags from her, trying not to get underfoot as she led him into her house.
“Your place is nice,” Luke said, glancing around at her apartment. Everything was done in light wood and pastels, giving the apartment a beachy feeling. It wasn’t what he would have imagined for Aubrey, but it was clean and bright and soothing.
“Thanks,” Aubrey said, her voice flat.
Luke followed her, setting the groceries down on the kitchen counter. He watched her move around the kitchen and put everything away, waiting patiently for her to finish. When she was done, she turned to him with an expectant expression.
“Let’s sit,” he said, gesturing to the living room. He headed to the couch without waiting to see if she’d follow; somehow, he knew that she would. Aubrey didn’t like taking orders, but she was too curious to walk away. He took a seat on the couch and waited.
“Alright. You’re here, you’ve got my attention,” Aubrey said, canting her head to one side as she perched on the opposite end of the couch. Her hands came to rest in the middle of her lap, bunching up the thin cotton of her black dress. He could tell that she was more anxious than she let on, could smell it on her. A note of lust lay under that, as well, but Luke ignored that for the moment.
“You know I don’t… talk a whole lot,” Luke began. Aubrey’s eyebrows raised, as if to say no kidding. “I’ve always been kind of reserved, even with my family. My brothers used to tease me, say that there was nothing going on inside my head. Nothing to talk about, you know?”
“I’ve never thought that,” Aubrey said, looking surprised.
“Yeah, it’s stupid. Just an old joke. But it’s true that I like to listen, and that I don’t share much with anyone else. Especially after some of the stuff I saw in the Army, it’s kind of hard to relate to most people. They’re talking about baseball, and my head is all full of…” Luke paused, making a circle in the air next to his head as he contemplated the right phrasing. “War, I guess. I don’t know how to make small talk, never have. Between being a Berserker and being military, I don’t have anything in common with anyone. It’s easier to listen to them talk about their hobbies and opinions than to tell stories about some of the stuff I’ve seen.”
“It’s okay, Luke. You don’t have to explain,” Aubrey said, scooting a little closer and putting her hand on his knee. The gesture warmed him, but he knew he had to focus. He needed to finish explaining things to her, tell her how he felt for once instead of just holding it all inside.
“When you talk to me, I lis
ten because I’m interested. You do your work at the shelter, which I think is awesome. You talked about your family a little, and I can definitely relate to that. You talk about people you know, and why their stories are interesting, and I can tell that you like to listen, too.”
Aubrey looked thoughtful, but she just nodded. Proving his point.
“I’ve known your name and your city since the day you left San Diego,” he said, switching tactics.
“You— Wait, you have?” she asked, looking shocked.
“Yeah. I got it from the front desk. I knew who you were and where you were, and I planned to come find you the second my feet hit American soil again,” he admitted.
“But that was years ago,” Aubrey rebutted.
“I know. I’m telling you that part because I don’t want you to think that I only came to find you after I saw you at that party at the Lodge. I don’t want you to think that I only came here because of some fucking decree by the Alphas’ Council, either. So I want to tell you why I didn’t come find you sooner.”
Luke turned his hand over, catching Aubrey’s fingers and lacing them with his own. She didn’t respond, but she did give him a soft, encouraging smile.
“I can’t tell you a lot of the specifics, but some really bad shit happened right after I left San Diego,” Luke began. “There was a lot of killing, really up close and personal. And it wasn’t just the enemy attacking us, either. I did a lot of things that I regret, even though it was my job and I was following orders. Even though not doing those things would probably have gotten me killed, I still feel like hell about it.”
Aubrey squeezed his fingers, tears glinting in her eyes as she listened to his story. Luke’s gut churned, wondering if telling her all this would drive her away. If she had any idea what he’d actually done, the way he’d killed so many. The idea turned his blood to ice, made him sick inside.
Luke’s mind transported him back to the camp in Jordan. He heard the shooter’s footsteps, saw the glint of a weapon. He’d dropped to the floor before he was even aware of his own movements, breath catching in his throat as the kid’s boots snicked across the sandy wood floor of the bunk room. He pictured the surprised faces of his team as they turned to face their death. Then the gun was in Luke’s hand, the bullet flying away from him, and the kid’s brains were everywhere. A perfect head shot, something the team referred to as “a Beran Special”. His special, special move—
