by Kat Mizera
“No!” Tatiana’s face tightened angrily.
“You will marry the right man or you will both die and your son will carry on my legacy!”
“Over my dead body.” Tatiana pulled the gun from her skirt, spun around and fired. The bullet hit her father right between the eyes just as another shot rang out and Tatiana froze in shock. Her hands moved to her abdomen as she slid to the ground and Sergei cried out.
“Tanya!” Sergei dropped down next to her, tearing off his jacket and pressing it to the wound.
“I’m sorry,” she whispered, her eyes meeting his guiltily. “I tried to protect you, Sergei.”
“Shh, it’s going to be okay,” he whispered as blood seeped through his jacket. “Hang on!”
“You have to go,” Tatiana rasped, a trickle of blood sliding from her lips. “If they find you here you’ll go to prison.”
“I don’t care!” Sergei cried, pulling her against him.
“I love you,” she whispered. “Tell Nikolai how much his mommy loved him.”
“Tatiana, hang on! Dammit, don’t you dare…” Sergei was gripping her tightly.
“Shh.” Her eyes were getting heavy. “It’s best this way. The family legacy is finished. There is no one else. Take our son and go home to Boston. Please, Sergei…”
“No…” Sergei fought tears as Tatiana’s eyes closed for the last time.
“Love you…” her voice was barely a whisper.
“Tanya!” His cry echoed through the almost empty warehouse as her father’s men scattered and Toli sank down next to him.
“I’m sorry.” Toli wrapped his arm around his brother and held him as he sobbed.
Sergei looked up and took a ragged breath. “Go,” he whispered. “Get out of here! She’s gone and you’ll all wind up in prison if the police find you here.”
“Sergei…” Toli was torn but the last place he wanted his son to go was a Russian prison.
“Go!” One of the men who had taken Anton growled in Toli’s direction. He hadn’t left with the others and was hovering over his deceased boss. “I will take care of the bodies and your brother.”
Toli wanted to protest but he knew if the police came there would be no easy way to explain what had happened here. He reached out to run a gentle finger along Tatiana’s cheek and he whispered a brief goodbye before getting to his feet and putting an arm around Anton.
“Now what?” Dom rasped as soon as they were outside.
“Where the hell is our ride?!” Toli grunted, looking around frantically.
Just then the blue Audi came around the corner with Zakk at the wheel and Tessa and Anastasia in the backseat.
“Go!” Dom pushed Toli and Anton towards the car. “Louie will find me and I’ll meet you at the condo.”
Toli didn’t hesitate to push Anton into the backseat and jump in the front. Just as he closed the door, Louie and Anatoly squealed around the corner and waved at Dom to get in. Toli glanced at Zakk. “You know where you’re going?”
“No fucking idea,” Zakk said cheerfully. “But your mom gives good sign language directions!”
Toli sighed. He looked into the backseat and saw tears sliding down Tessa’s face and he reached one hand back, meeting her eyes as he waited for her to take it.
“Dad, can we go to Hawaii or something next summer?” Anton asked in a shaky voice. “I seem to remember saying I didn’t want to come to Russia and this has been a shitty vacation.”
Toli nodded wearily. “Next summer, we’ll go anywhere you want.”
“What happened?” Tessa asked. “Where are Sergei and Tatiana?”
Though his voice broke, Toli told them everything.
Anastasia didn’t say a word, instead turning to fuss over Anton while Toli kept his hand clenched around Tessa’s, though neither of them spoke. Zakk concentrated on the road and tried not to think about how worried Tiff must be right now. She’d understood why he’d needed to come, but damn he’d hated leaving her. All he wanted right now was to get back to her and their life in Las Vegas. He’d read about people who lived lives like this in books, but he’d never seen anything like it firsthand. He’d never seen anybody get shot until the reception and he wondered how Anton was feeling right now. Toli seemed completely grief-stricken and there was unspoken worry about Sergei.
They all got back to the apartment at the same time and pushed into the elevator without saying a word. Anastasia was still holding on to Anton and although she hadn’t said a word since he’d told them what happened, Toli refused to let go of Tessa’s hand. They filed into the apartment and Anton immediately disappeared into one bathroom while Zakk used the other. Anastasia collapsed on the couch with her husband next to her. Dom and Louie lounged against the living room wall while Toli sank into the armchair in the corner, pulling Tessa reluctantly onto his lap.
“Am I the only one who’s freaked out?” Dom asked after a moment.
“No.” Toli shook his head. “But I need a little time to compose myself. I’m numb.”
“Anyone is hungry?” Anastasia asked after a moment of awkward silence.
“I could eat,” Dom admitted, slightly embarrassed.
“Me too,” Zakk grimaced.
“You got enough for everyone?” Louie asked.
“Come.” Anastasia stood and headed for the kitchen. She paused to look down at her husband, who frowned at her. Then his eyes widened and he abruptly got up.
“Yes, I am hungry also.” He followed them, leaving Toli and Tessa alone.
Tessa started to get up, but Toli held her fast. “You know you have a bad habit of running away from me.”
“Except for Russia, when did I run away from you?” she demanded.
“The morning after our first night together,” he said, holding up a finger. “You were as attracted to me as I was to you, but you just marched up to Erin’s apartment building and never looked back!”
“Not true.” She lifted one shoulder. “I looked back…just not until after you were halfway down the street. And I didn’t run away—it’s not like you asked me to stay. I didn’t even know your name!”
“And then when you went back to Chicago after we’d been living together for nearly two months!” He held up a second finger.
“I didn’t run away!” she protested. “I wasn’t sure my marriage was over and the only way to find out was to go back.”
“Uh-huh.” He made a face. “And here in Russia.” He held up three fingers. “Three times you’ve left me, Tessa. I’ll give you a pass on the first time, and the second time had extenuating circumstances—but the third time? It was technically our honeymoon. You didn’t even give me the courtesy of letting me know you were leaving or that you got home okay. I don’t understand how you could do that—no matter what we were going through.”
“You don’t understand?!” Her eyes narrowed. “After I saw you and Tatiana in the bathroom together?! And even though she denied it, you admitted it!”
“I admitted what?!” he demanded, standing up and facing her. “What the hell are you talking about?!”
“Out in the hall, right before you left to go get Anton! You apologized for what you’d done and said that you hoped you would have a chance to make it up to me! I know you’ve been through hell the last couple of days, but what happened tonight is totally separate from cheating on me.”
“Cheating!” Toli was so mad he couldn’t think of anything to say. “You actually thought…” Without a word, he turned and stormed into his parents’ bedroom, slamming the door behind him.
A sob escaped Tessa’s chest and she sank back into the chair, burying her face in her hands. She didn’t have the strength to fight with him after everything that had happened tonight. Now that Anton was safe, she just wanted to go home. Her marriage was obviously over, and that hurt more than she could stand. Her chest was so tight she felt light-headed and it was all she could do not to heave all over everything. She was emotional and scared and heartbroken, so many emotio
ns running through her that she didn’t hear the door open and close quietly or realize someone was standing over her.
“Tessa?” Sergei’s ragged voice startled her. “Are you okay?”
“No,” she whispered. Then she blinked. “Sergei, what are you—”
“She’s gone,” he said, sinking down next to her. “There was nothing I could do and Evgeni is better equipped to get the bodies some place they’ll be found. I had to get somewhere the police can contact me when they find her, so I came here…” His voice trailed off.
“I’m so sorry,” she said, hugging him. “I don’t know what to say.”
“There’s nothing to say. She did what she had to do. For herself, for me, and for Nikolai.” He hung his head. “Damn, I don’t know how I’m going to act as if everything is normal until the police come.”
“We’ll help you.” In spite of everything going on, Tessa could feel Sergei’s pain and she ached for him. She might not have liked Tatiana, but she didn’t wish her dead. And now there was a little boy who didn’t have a mother.
“Where’s Toli?” he asked.
“He got mad at me and stormed out of the room.”
“In the middle of all this you had another fight?” His eyes met hers. “Tessa, what is going on with you two?”
She hung her head. “It doesn’t matter.”
“Yes, of course it matters! I can’t bring Tatiana back, but I can’t allow myself to start grieving until they come for me to identify the body. So you might as well tell me what’s happening.”
“I know what they did and every time I bring it up, he gets angry with me instead of the other way around.”
“What Toli and Tatiana did?” He cocked his head. “What are you talking about?”
“What they did in the bathroom at our hotel the night of our reception here in Moscow.”
Sergei frowned. “You mean when she checked his stitches?”
Tessa narrowed her eyes. “You mean that’s what she told you, too?”
“Told me?” Sergei made a face. “Tessa, I know it’s late and we’re all tired, but I was there that night. I was standing behind Tatiana as she checked his shoulder—so I’m not sure what you saw, but I was right there.”
Tessa felt a mixture of embarrassment and relief that was so acute she had to close her eyes again. That had been Tatiana’s story too, and now she was so damn confused she really didn’t know what to believe anymore.
“Go tell him you’re sorry for jumping to conclusions,” he said softly. “The two of you need to talk. This has been a big mess, and a lot of it is his fault, but you need to be the one to fix it because right now he needs someone who’ll love him unconditionally—the way I did Tatiana.”
“I don’t know what he needs.”
“He needs you to trust him. Tatiana never did, and even though she may have had good reasons, it hurts him. Don’t let that be what comes between you. Trust me—one day it will be too late.”
“I’m scared,” she admitted miserably.
“Just talk to him, Tessa. Toli gives 100% to everything, but when you hurt him it cuts deep. You need to show him you’ll take responsibility, even if it wasn’t entirely your fault.”
“I don’t feel so hot,” she said finally. “I need to use the bathroom.” She got up and went to the guest bathroom in the hall. She locked herself inside and splashed cold water on her face. If the encounter in the bathroom had been innocent, what the hell had happened? Who had he been on the phone with when she overheard his conversation? If the mob was after Sergei, who was the man who’d told her Toli wanted to keep her here in Russia and that Tatiana was the woman he was meant to be with? She was even more confused now, which was making her head start to hurt, and she rubbed her temples, desperate for relief. She wanted to ask if anyone had an aspirin, but she knew she had to talk to Toli first.
She gave herself a few minutes, and when she wasn’t as queasy she walked down the hall to the master bedroom and slowly opened the door. Toli was at the window, staring out into the darkness.
“Toli?”
“Do you want to file for divorce or do you want me to?” he asked, refusing to turn around.
“Toli.” She tried to touch his arm but he wrenched it away. “I’m sorry if I hurt you, but you hurt me too. Seeing you in the bathroom with her broke my heart, and then that man told me all these things about you…I was scared!”
“What man?” He looked at her warily.
“Some KGB guy—or whatever he was—walked up to me outside the hotel. I’d gone out to get some air and I couldn’t stop crying after I saw you with Tatiana. He told me you were MGB or whatever and that Moscow was no place for me and my little girl, that we should go back to America before you trapped us here.”
Toli shook his head. “You believed that? After all we’ve been through, you believed I was a spy?!”
“I’d just seen you in the bathroom, without a shirt on and one arm around your ex-girlfriend. What was I supposed to think? I had no idea something else was going on. Because obviously I’ve been out of the loop.”
He sighed, closing his eyes and hanging his head. “That’s what I was apologizing for,” he said quietly. “For not being honest with you about what had been going on—not for cheating! God, Tessa, don’t you trust me at all?”
She met his gaze guiltily. “We’ve known each other ten months. Ten. Months. Not even a year. I spent a decade with a man who betrayed me in ways I still can’t wrap my head around. He was paying people to find him custom child pornography he could watch online—with our baby and me in the next room. And I had no idea. I love you, more than anything, but it was too soon for something this serious to get thrown at me. Especially since I didn’t know what was going on. The worst part is—I still don’t. I still have no idea what’s been happening, other than Anton was kidnapped and somehow Tatiana was involved, even though it doesn’t appear that she knew it.”
“There’s so much I have to tell you to clear all of this up,” he said. “It’s a really long, complicated story, though, so I think it’s going to take my father to help tell all of it. But I have to know where we stand, Tessa. Before we go out there and get the whole story, I have to know what you want.”
“You,” she whispered, tears puddling in her eyes again. “I’ve always wanted you, but it feels like there’s so much distance between us right now. I’ve never been afraid you would hurt me physically, but I have to be honest and admit that I feel like I don’t know who you are right now.”
“I suppose that’s fair.” He looked down, unsure what to say or do next. He loved her and now better understood why she felt the way she did, but it still hurt. She should have trusted him, and in a moment of insecurity should have come to him and asked him what was going on. But what if you’d really been a spy, he asked himself silently. She’d had her daughter with her and if he’d actually been MGB, there was no way for her to know what a secret government agent was capable of. He had to admit that she’d come back—albeit without her daughter—when she’d realized he might need her. Even though she’d still thought he might be a spy and had cheated on her. With all of that in her head, she’d still come to him when Anton had been kidnapped. That spoke volumes about her heart and this time he didn’t want to pretend that everything would be okay on its own. This time he was going to have to work to save his relationship; something he hadn’t done with Tatiana.
“I’m sorry, Toli.” Her lower lip was quivering and she swiped at the tears that were trailing down her cheeks in uneven little paths.
“Fuck, Tessa, what have we done?” He was so tired; all he wanted was for this to be over.
“I don’t want a divorce,” she whimpered, throwing herself at him and letting her tears soak through his shirt. “I love you! I don’t know how we got to this place, but I want to fix it!” She sagged against him, though she had a death grip on his shirt.
“It’s okay, sweetheart.” He stroked her hair gently. “We’ll figur
e this out. Just stop crying.”
She felt a wave of nausea wash over her and her hand flew to her mouth as she tried to keep down the contents of her stomach.
He instinctively grabbed a nearby wastebasket and held it as she vomited.
“Hey.” He held her hair as she heaved several more times. Then he pulled her to him and let her rest against his chest. “You okay?”
“It’s been a rough couple of days,” she admitted.
“You think?” He ran his fingers along her cheek. “Let’s get you in the bathroom so you can clean up.”
“We have to talk,” she whispered.
“Sweetheart, I’m not going anywhere. That can wait—you’re sick.”
“We can’t leave things like this.”
He leaned over and kissed the top of her head. “Somehow, everything has to be okay. I refuse to give up on us that easily.”
“I shouldn’t have left you,” she whispered. “But when that man told me those things…”
“It’s okay, my love. I should have talked to you, instead of letting your imagination run wild.”
“And then I heard you on the phone, saying you could never convince me to leave the U.S.”
“What?” He stared at her. “I don’t know what you think you heard, but I never said that.”
“Toli, I heard you.” She swallowed. “I was getting dressed and had come out to get my earrings. You were standing just outside the door in the hallway, speaking in English. You said—”
“My mother!” he groaned, closing his eyes. “I was talking to Sergei about getting our parents out of Russia and I said I didn’t think she would leave! Not you, my mother!”
“Dammit.” Tessa hung her head in frustration. “This has been an immense clusterfuck. I’m so sorry, Toli.”
He touched her face. “I know, love. Me, too. I didn’t mean to hide anything—but that’s what we’ve always done. Sergei and I made sure no one knew anything, and my father made sure Sergei and I only knew enough to keep away.”
