by Piper Lawson
With a girl, he was going to say.
A girl like me, I thought, remembering the party pictures Ava had shown me the other night.
Probably nameless. Definitely forgettable.
I shifted off the bed, noticing for the first time the tangle of blankets falling off the side of the bed. The maple syrup soaking into the white sheets. A pile of strawberries littering the carpet.
Yeah, this was classy as fuck.
“Jordan. Wait.” Ethan said my name like he knew what was going through my head.
“Jordan, your phone keeps going off,” Ava appeared behind Nate in the hallway. “Colton wants to talk to you.”
I jerked. “What? Colton called you?”
“On the room phone. Apparently he tried you first but you didn’t answer. He says he’s downstairs.”
“That’s not possible.” The blood had already drained from my head.
“Who the hell is Colton?” Ethan demanded.
“Her boyfriend,” Nate offered.
I let out a frustrated groan. “Ex.”
“It is kind of romantic that he flew across the country to talk to you,” Ava commented.
It’s not romantic, it’s fucked up.
But when I turned back to see Ethan’s face it had already transformed. Any hint of the openness, the passion, had faded away. “Whatever.” He held the door for Nate to enter and I felt my gut twist.
Before I could decide what to do, or say, the door closed in my face.
14
Jordan
“What are you doing here?”
Colton turned to face me. “Nice to see you too.”
His dark hair was as neatly trimmed as ever, his dress shirt pressed over khakis. The intensity of his expression was at odds with the hotel lobby, the whimsical flock of pastel paper cranes suspended from the ceiling a few feet behind his head.
“It’s not nice to see you, Colt,” I blurted. “It’s weird. And verging on creepy. How did you find me?”
“Your father told me. He thought you were here with someone.” Suddenly I felt a lot less guilty about bailing on my dad’s gala. “Are you?”
“No. I don’t know.”
I’d thought about what I might say if we talked again. Angry words. Hurt words. But now seeing him here, those emotions mixed in with all the others I was feeling.
After leaving Ethan’s room, I’d thrown on jeans and a T-shirt. I’d also scrubbed the remainder of last night’s makeup from my face, hard enough to leave my cheeks pink. But I couldn’t wipe away the tingling of my lips, my skin.
“I know you’re upset, Jordan.” Colton’s voice brought me back.
“I’m not upset. We broke up. There’s a difference. Do you remember why we broke up? Because you used me. And you lied to me.”
“Can we just sit down a second? It’s the least you can do after I spent the last four hours on a plane.”
I took in his appearance. The shirt just starting to wrinkle around the edges. The bags under his eyes.
I followed him to a grouping of furniture, ignoring the spot on the couch next to him and perching on the arm of a chair opposite.
Colton leaned back on the couch, his eyes clouding. “Do you remember when we met junior year? We were the only people who liked economics class and the artichoke pizza they made at lunch.”
“Colt, don’t tell me you flew to Vegas to reminisce.”
Despite myself, I could remember it. Colton was one of the first real friends I’d made in private school. Unlike me, he was there on partial scholarship. He’d played the bass and I’d played guitar, and we used to jam in the guy’s dorms after hours once Mr. McIntyre finished his rounds early and passed out with a bottle of gin.
Colton had been the first guy I’d let down my guard with. We’d kept in touch through college, just emails or messages a couple of times a year. When I’d found out he was done business school and looking for a job, I’d suggested he call my dad. He did, and when I’d started seeing him at work things, we’d hung out more.
We’d finally started dating last year. Maybe it was a matter of convenience—I was tired of not having anyone to spend time with, and he was safe.
Colton was a friend and I’d trusted him.
Until now.
He shook his head. “You know, Jordan, I had a crush on you all of senior year.”
“That’s not true.”
“It was true. You dated Dave Campbell for five months and I didn’t say a damned thing—even though the guy would’ve rather dated the entire football team than you. Then you went to Northwestern and I went to Cambridge. It was four years, Jordan, before you came back, and suddenly I had a hope in hell.”
The earnestness in his voice almost made me want to believe it. But the truth got in the way.
“You lied to me, Colt. Personally and professionally. You cut all those jobs at Evergreen just in time to raise quarterly earnings and to look like a hero, collect your bonus check. And you told my father I supported it so that you could ram the decision through the board. You hung me out to dry, along with half the people working at that company. The one my father built, and the one I worked my ass off to protect.”
His body straightened, and he looked me dead in the eyes. “Did I profit from it? Sure. But I had to make a hard decision. I’d do it again.” He folded his arms over his chest, frustration radiating off him. “You ever wonder why you get off on fixing other people’s mistakes so much? It’s because you can’t stand looking at your own. I might have pulled the trigger, but you loaded the gun. It was your bad call that started all this. Back when you worked at the company instead of running around with your little fashion hobby.”
Ice chilled my veins and my chest constricted. “Is that all you wanted to say?”
He blew out a breath, his expression bleak on mine. “No. Did you forget the part where you walked into my apartment and—”
“No. I haven’t.” Everything around us slowed down. The sounds of the lobby faded and it was just me and Colt.
“Because it sounds like you have. It sounds like you didn’t give a shit about what you saw. Fuck, Jordan. You get how messed up this is? I mean, what do your friends think?” Colt’s voice was urgent.
“I didn’t tell them,” I murmured.
“Of course you didn’t. Because you don’t tell anyone anything. You can’t let anyone in, you never have. Not even me.” He shifted off the couch, paced a few steps away.
Anger smoldered in my stomach. “Wait a second. You betrayed me, lied to me, and on top of it you’re insulting my life choices…and you’re upset with me?”
Colt turned back to me, and the frustration had been replaced with defeat. “I came to try and talk some sense into you. To say it’s not too late for us. But I see it now. It’s always been too late for us, hasn’t it? Not because you don’t love me. Because you can’t love anyone. You keep yourself at a distance and don’t let yourself get hurt. Well, someday you’re going to get hurt either way.”
I had no retort. No anything. Just a feeling like I’d been gouged in the stomach.
I’d almost convinced myself Colt couldn’t hurt me.
I’d been wrong.
He slipped back into the jacket he’d been holding. I watched wordlessly as he crossed the lobby and brushed through the doors.
15
Ethan
“Ethan?”
I tore my gaze away from the view of the bluffs and turned back to Barlow. He smiled benevolently from under his hardhat.
“It’s quite a view, isn’t it?” he called over the wind that blew through the hills.
“It will be,” I agreed.
The site for the construction was incredible. Three hundred units would be spread across four buildings. The single-family bungalows had already been levelled, making room for a building that would have nearly unobstructed visuals of the ocean.
“It’s going to be the best,” Barlow commented. “And for this project, we need the best. I
’ve heard that you and Mick are the best.”
As if hearing his name, the man appeared behind us. “Good afternoon, gentlemen.”
“Mick, I was about to tell Ethan that you both have a week to prepare your case. Get prospects. Dazzle me.” Barlow beamed with the confidence of a man who’s used to having people jump when asked. “You’ll each present to the senior management team. Then we’ll make a decision.”
Mick grinned. “I look forward to it, Todd.”
“Good.” He nodded crisply before turning and crossing to a Hummer parked over the grass.
“You know why they tapped you.” Mick shoved his hands in his pockets with a look that bordered on glee.
“Why’s that?”
“They need it to look fair. Take a good kid like yourself, give him a chance—or at least make him think he has one.”
“Who’s to say I don’t?”
“Ethan. It is Ethan, isn’t it?” He raised his brows and I had to resist the urge to slam my fist between them. “I’ve handled builds like this before. Not just getting a handful of B-list wannabes and their grandmothers into ranch houses every year.”
I ignored the jab.
“But if I can give you some advice? You want to be on top, you gotta pay attention to who’s underneath you.”
A warning prickled at the back of my brain. “What the hell is that supposed to mean?”
“It means you want to win at this game? You can’t have someone to go home to at night. You gotta give this everything you have. And even then?” He shrugged. “Most people aren’t enough for this life. Speaking of which, how is your girlfriend? I hear congratulations are in order.”
“You heard wrong.”
“Not for you. For her.” He cocked his head. “You didn’t know Gia got engaged. Some Italian businessman, I think. Mutual friend mentioned it recently.”
I stared at his square head, his shiny skin. The urge to pop his head like a grape was overwhelming.
But that wasn’t my style.
Instead I extended a hand. He took it, the briefest surprise flicking over his face.
“Mick. I’d say ‘always a pleasure.’ But a conversation with you is about as pleasurable as a colonoscopy. See you in a week.”
I turned, starting back toward my i8. Blood pounded in my veins like I’d just run a race.
More like about to start one.
I didn’t know if what he’d said about Gia was true. All I could think about was squashing Mick the Prick into the ground like a bug. But I’d need to get working on promotion strategies. Go through all of my contacts. Work up the proposal. Dom and I would be redlining all week but they’d have to peel Barlow off the ceiling when I was done.
My phone vibrated, and I glanced at the call display.
“What,” I answered flatly.
“Hello, brother dearest. Jordan’s making a slideshow for the wedding and we need some pictures from Mom’s. Can you take her to get them?”
“Why can’t Mom send them?” I turned away from the views, glancing at the construction site. They were deep in their work, like I needed to be.
“We want to surprise Mom and Dad, so they can’t know.”
I rubbed the back of my neck as I watched Mick talking with Barlow. Whether what he’d said about this being a done deal was true or not, he was already in this game, and I knew he wasn’t going to rest on his ass.
“The wedding is two weeks away and, if you haven’t forgotten, you’re the best man. Not the sort-of-crusty man,” she chided. “Jordan would’ve called you herself, but said she hasn’t heard from you.”
Part of that statement was true. Jordan had emailed me yesterday afternoon asking to see some more places.
I hadn’t gotten back to her yet.
“Ethan? You need to do this. Whatever thing you think is more important than your family right now, it’ll still be waiting for you tonight.”
I shook my head to clear it.
“Fine.”
I checked my watch, then sent out a text. We had a chance of escaping before traffic hit.
Jordan brushed out the doors almost the second I pulled up.
Her ripped skinny jeans and orange tank top screamed laundry day. Her hair was in careless waves ending just below her collarbone, and when her gaze met mine, her face was bare of makeup.
She looked like she didn’t have anything to prove.
Which irritated me.
“Thanks for doing this,” Jordan offered as she shifted into the car.
I turned to focus on the road and peeled out of the lot before she got her seatbelt on.
“How was your flight back from Vegas?” she asked.
I just shrugged. “Takeoff. Almonds. Landing. Listen, I know you don’t like small talk. I have to make some calls.”
I pulled out onto the highway and proceeded to spend most of the drive on my headset. First to Dom, asking for his help with the development. Next I called clients.
Jordan figured out the game pretty quick, alternating between watching the view pass us by and tapping away on her own phone.
Probably texting Colton, I thought.
It was immature but dammit, I was annoyed.
Annoyed because I’d built up this idea in my head that maybe Jordan had been into me. That she’d worked up her nerve to do something about it this weekend.
That the fierce attraction that’d hit me like a tidal wave these past few days wasn’t one-sided.
That idea had popped like a balloon when I’d found out her boyfriend had been waiting for her in Vegas. So not only was I left hanging, she’d lied to me too.
I hadn’t seen her since shutting the door on her in Vegas, but I could still remember the startled look on her face. The sting of it had dulled in the past day, but the disappointment lingered.
“Welcome to Casa Cameron.” I held the door while Jordan stepped inside my parents’ ranch house in a suburb of San Diego.
My mom’s office used to be Kate’s bedroom, but with Kate gone the longest, it was the first to get converted. My room was the gym.
“Pictures are probably in here,” I offered, hitting the light switch on the wall. “My mom never had them put on digital. You know what you’re looking for?”
“Pics of Dylan as a kid. Your mom won’t mind us looking around?”
“It’s fine.”
She started opening a closet and I went for the file cabinet on the other side of the room. My fingers flew over the tabs. Mostly it was boring stuff, taxes, legal files. No sign of photos. Knowing my mom she’d have them neatly labelled…unlike my sister, who’d probably have them in a tampon box or something.
A grunt had me turning to see a shoe box falling off a shelf toward Jordan’s head. She caught it just in time.
I glanced over and our eyes met. “You OK?”
“Yeah.”
I turned back and opened the second drawer of the cabinet before she could say anything else.
A few minutes later, I heard Jordan’s sigh. “I can’t find anything.”
“Me either. We could try the garage.” I started to turn toward the door but her voice stopped me.
“Ethan, what happened to no games? You’ve been freezing me out since we got back from Vegas. If you want to say something, say it.”
“How’s Colton?”
She lifted her chin, shifting to lean back against the desk. “He’s my ex.”
“Exes don’t just show up across the country like that.”
“Then you don’t know Colt.”
The nickname had my hands fisting at my sides. “What did he want?”
“I thought he wanted to get back together. But he decided there was no point after what happened. I should be glad he finally admitted it.”
The hurt in her voice cut through my anger. I wasn’t used to feeling uncertain, yet I suddenly felt off-balance.
I stepped closer, my feet soundless on the carpet.
“What did happen?”
Jordan
’s attention focused on the square of floor between us. “I haven’t told anyone. Not even Lex and Ava.”
The importance of this wasn’t lost on me. I mean, girls tell each other everything. Hopes, dreams, embarrassing reality TV crushes…
But I wasn’t about to let her off the hook.
“Come on, Jordan.” My voice was calmer than it had been. “You were half naked in my bed this weekend. You don’t think I deserve to know?”
She watched me for a long moment, the wheels turning behind her eyes. Finally she blew out a breath.
“Yeah, OK.”
16
Ethan
“After my mom died, it took me a while to get my head on straight. Not like a few months. I’m talking until senior year. Colt helped with that.
“See, parents think private school is some safe place to send their kids. Really, it’s just where children of narcissists go to practice winning by stepping on other people. Girls go out of their way to embarrass you. Guys brag about shit you’d never done with them. Colt never tried anything with me, and he never made fun of me.
“At Northwestern, I realized there were places that people weren’t out to get you. And even though I didn’t really fit in, I saw what that looked like. When I finished business school, I couldn’t wait to cut my teeth in the real world. I figured work would help pull me out of the seven-year lull I was in. So I helped out at two of my dad’s companies, and was able to make real changes at both. Good changes. I finally felt like maybe I was onto something, like I had a place I could make a difference.
“Then I went to Evergreen, a furniture company. My dad was ecstatic I was working for him. But I didn’t want it to look like he was promoting me unfairly so I started one rung up from the bottom and moved up every six months until I was the manager in retail distribution.
