by Edward Brody
What the hell is this thing? I thought frantically.
The stinging and wiggling persisted as I started getting lightheaded from lack of air, realizing how dire the situation had become. I tried to ignore the intruder and swam back towards the surface of the river, desperate to fill my lungs with oxygen. When I broke the surface, I spat up water and coughed. “Hurry!” I yelled behind me. “There’s something in here!”
Ozzy swam faster, and I finally reached the other side of the river. My armor sloshed as I climbed on to the muddy ground and slammed my hand hard against my leather armor, trying to kill whatever was still squirming around inside. I rolled on the ground and groaned as more shocks rocked me over and over again.
Each bolt of pain only took about 3% of my health, but the stinging that it exuded was so excruciating that they felt like 30% blows. I fell to my knees and started jamming my hands in my leggings as Ozzy made his way on to the land.
“What’s wrong, dude?” Ozzy huffed as he trudged up to me.
“Ahh, fuck!” I screamed as another shock rattled me. “Something is in my armor!” I rolled around onto my knees and started unzipping the front of my pants.
“What the hell are you doing?” Ozzy groaned.
“Dude!” Another shock ripped through my body, as I pulled down my pants, exposing my bare ass.
“Oh shit!” Ozzy cried. “Stay still”
“What is it?” I moaned as I turned around to see a long, slimy, snake-like creature latched on to my ass cheek. It was dark gray and about as thick as my arm, wriggling around rapidly and pulsing like a leech. “Shit!”
How the hell could something that big get in my pants?
Ozzy grabbed the end of the creature and held its wriggling body out straight before slamming his sword down its center. A runny, clear liquid spilled out, and there was one final shock of pain that jolted from where it was latched on to me. I grabbed the half of its remaining body and yanked its suckers off me.
It fell to the ground and continued to writhe around until I finally shot a Fireblast at it.
You have gained 150 XP!
There was a big red welt on my ass, and I fell exhausted on the grass as I tried to regain my composure. My breath was heavy and my ass was stinging.
“You alright?” Ozzy asked.
“Yeah, I think I’ll be fine.” I looked up at him and squinted my eyes together. “But don’t ever mention this to anyone. Eels hanging off my ass?” I shook my head. “I’d rather forget this ever happened.”
Ozzy laughed as I picked myself up and started refastening my pants. “Trust me. I’d rather not tell anyone what I just saw… That eel wriggling around on your uhh... It just… um….” He shook his head. “I’d have way too much explaining to do.”
“Fucking embarrassing,” I spat.
Ozzy laughed again. “Hey, at least I got 200 XP from the thing.”
I raised an eyebrow. “You got 200? I only got 150…”
“Well, I did most of the damage. I figure that’s about the right distribution.”
I gave a slight nod. “I don’t know if grouping really helps with XP, but we should probably group up to see each other’s stat bars anyway.”
“Yeah, let’s do it.” Ozzy looked up to the forest in front of us and tilted his body from side to side as he tried to peek through the trees. “What all is in this forest?”
“There’s lots of animals, but I’ve seen bandits and other things as well. Keep your eyes open.” I focused on inviting Ozzy to join my group.
Ozzy Caldwell has joined your party!
“You’re level 12 now?’ I asked.
Ozzy nodded. “Been grinding hard the last few days.”
He had been a couple levels lower than me when we first met, so the fact that he was now a higher level than me made me feel even more regret about staying home and playing the merchant the last few days. My competitive nature was tugging at me.
“Check this out,” Ozzy clucked. He closed his eyes and slammed his hands together while muttering something I couldn’t hear. A white band of energy rushed out from around him. When he opened his eyes, he said, “This should help us find some stuff to kill.”
“Ummm… What?”
A second later, a brown and white, floppy-eared dog came rushing in our direction. It was some sort of hound—I was guessing a Harrier hound but I had no way of being sure. Its size and behavior was the same as any normal pooch on Earth’s would be.
Name: Royce
Race: animal
Level: 5
Health/Mana/Stamina: 60/0/40
Status: friendly
“Hey boy!” Ozzy said as he started petting the head of the dog. He turned to me and smiled as the dog jumped all around him wildly. “He’s a hunting dog. Should help us sniff out monsters or game.”
“I figured that much,” I said. “Where did you find him?”
“There’s a petkeeper in Newich. Spent just about all my gold on buying this fella.”
I kneeled to pet Royce, and while he did let me stroke him on the head, he seemed reluctant to accept any touch but Ozzy’s. “Have you taken him out hunting before?”
“Yeah, of course,” Ozzy said. “But not much. The petkeeper told me not to do the whole summon/dismiss thing too often or the dog might lose interest in me…”
I smiled. “Yeah, that’s how it works, from what I understand.”
“You have a pet too?”
“A great panther.”
“A panther?” Ozzy’s eyebrows twisted. “How the hell did you get a panther?”
“I found her in the Vale when she was a baby. Her mother was killed by some sort of monsters, so I picked her up.”
“Well, let’s see this pet of yours.”
I sucked in my bottom lip and considered summoning Sora. It had been a few days since I last saw her, being cooped up playing merchant and all. She had spent quite a lot of time in the Otherworld. But then again, I knew that I’d have to let her go once we made our way to the Vale.
“Not now,” I said. “Like you mentioned, summoning and releasing too frequently supposedly agitates beasts, and the elves at the Vale probably won’t allow our pets inside.”
Ozzy moaned. “Well, let’s just get going towards this place we’re heading. No use standing around.” He rubbed behind his dog’s ears. “C’mon boy.”
“You know, that dog is an NPC too,” I said. “You seem to treat him with the same respect that you’d give a real dog.”
Ozzy smirked and shrugged. “How can you not love this guy?” He scratched the dog furiously. “I guess I’m just partial to animals.”
I chuckled as Ozzy stood back up and started towards me. “One last thing before we go.”
“What’s that?” he asked.
I reached inside my bag, feeling around for anything valuable that I could offer the keemus. I considered offering the bandages, but those were relatively inexpensive, and I didn’t want to offend anyone. We also needed them just in case we encountered danger the rest of the trip. I settled on the gold bracelet that I had found in the mine. I was sure it would sell for a decent sum of cash at a vendor, but it had no immediate use, and I was hoping that the keemus would accept it.
“Over here,” I said. I walked a few meters into Addenfall and got down on one knee, holding the bracelet in my hand. “Kneel down beside me and make sure your dog doesn’t attack anything.”
“Uhhh… Okay.” Ozzy got in the same position as me and wrapped an arm around Royce’s neck. “Going to explain what’s going on?”
“Just lower your eyes.”
Ozzy threw me the stink eye and then lowered his eyes, still holding tightly onto his pet.
I lowered my eyes as well, held the bracelet out in my palm, and spoke loudly. “Tribute for Addenfall.”
There were a few seconds of silence before I heard branches and leaves rustling. Ozzy and I looked up, and seemingly from nowhere, several brown, furry keemus started climbing down from treetop
s and out from behind brush. Some were holding their weapons, but they seemed relatively unalarmed as one of the keemus came close and glared at the bracelet in my hand.
Ozzy seemed awestruck, and he gripped tighter onto Royce after he let out a random bark.
“Tribute for Addenfall,” I said again. “Hopefully, this is enough for me and my friend.”
The keemu looked at the bracelet and then back to his friends. No one else seemed to make a move. After a few tense seconds of silence, he grabbed the bracelet from my hand and said, “Welcome,” in his beady voice.
I stood back to my feet and turned to Ozzy. “We’re good now. The keemus here are the guardians of Addenfall. They pretty much watch over everything, but tribute must be paid for anyone spending time in the forest.”
Ozzy stood and smirked. “I’m already loving this place.”
I smiled. “You haven’t seen anything yet.”
The sun was going down by the time we approached the edge of the Vale. Royce had chased after a few squirrels on the way, but otherwise we avoided any major encounters that required Ozzy or I to get involved.
I raised my hand a couple times and cast Divine Sight on myself and my companion as darkness fell.
“Thanks,” Ozzy said. “You’ve got a lot of tricks up your sleeve.”
“And so do you. What’s that thing you do that gets everyone to turn their attention to you? A taunt of some sort?”
“Yeah,” Ozzy said. “It’s called ‘Intimidating Shout’. I saw a guy in the Newich tavern use it on a guy who wasn’t keen to get in a brawl. Soon as he shouted at the guy, the fists started flying. It wasn’t even directed to me but it practically made me want to join in on the action. I tried to replicate it on some MOBs around the Freelands and eventually picked up the skill. I can teach you it if you’d like.”
I snickered. “I think I’ll pass on that one—wouldn’t fit my kit very well. The last thing I need is for more things to be attacking me at any given time. “
“Halt!” a voice shouted out from above.
Ozzy and I immediately stopped moving, and I slapped him against his chest. “It’s the elves. Kneel.” We both got into a kneeling position, and Royce started barking like crazy.
“It’s me, Gunnar!” I shouted.
“Gunnar Long of Edgewood?” the elf asked, coming into view with his bow raised and an arrow nocked. “What are you doing in the Vale?”
“I’ve come to pay a visit to Princess Adeelee,” I said over the barking dog.
“Calm the hound,” the elf ordered.
Ozzy tugged Royce closer to him and the dog began to quiet.
“Who is your companion?”
“His name is Ozzy. He’ll be accompanying me into the Vale… erm...” I cleared my throat. “That is, if you allow us passage.”
“You already have freedom of passage in the Vale,” the elf explained, “But if you bring your friend with you, you will be responsible for his actions.”
“I understand,” I replied.
“Very well,” the elf said. “You may rise and proceed, but your friend must release his hound.”
Ozzy and I both stood, and he released Royce after giving him one last rub on the head. The dog turned and ran back off in the direction of Addenfall.
“Thanks,” I said to the elf, and Ozzy and I started down the path. I turned one last time and watched as the elf easily scaled the ladder leading back up to his perch.
“Security’s tight here,” Ozzy commented.
“There’s guards stationed all around the palace too, and we’re likely to be the only humans in sight. Thank goodness you’re not wearing any weird-ass fur armor.”
“What would that have to do with anything?” Ozzy asked.
I shook my head and sighed. “Oh, it’s a long story.”
We continued down the path until we made it to the village in the center of the Vale, and Ozzy’s eyes went wide with wonder as soon as it came into view. “This place looks incredible,” he said, his head turning in every direction, admiring the craftsmanship of the elven homes.
Aside from the guards, there were only a few other elves out and about at this time in the evening, but it looked like the stand that served elven pie was still operating. There was no way I was bringing someone to the Vale without introducing them to what was perhaps the best-tasting food ever created.
“Over here,” I said, motioning Ozzy towards the vendor.
Ozzy took a deep breath as we approached. “Something smells amazing…”
“Elven pie…” I gloated. “You’ve got to try it.”
I tossed the vendor some gold and in exchange we received an elven pie each.
The moment I bit down into the generous morsel, I was immediately sent into food heaven. I enjoyed Edgewood—kinda. But it just didn’t compare with what was on offer in the Vale. If my plan to turn Edgewood into something that rivaled the Vale were to ever come to fruition, I’d have to hire a food vendor too—particularly one who could prepare elven pie.
“Oh my god…” Ozzy moaned. “This is…”
“Amazing, right?” I finished for him.
“I’ve never tasted anything like it.” Ozzy swallowed hard and rammed another piece of pie into his mouth as he turned and scanned our surroundings. “Are those guys skinny dipping?” he asked with his mouth full, pointing toward a couple elves that were splashing around in the falls at the bottom of the palace.
“Bathing actually,” a familiar voice said from behind me.
I turned around and almost choked when I saw Adeelee. She looked like her usual, gorgeous self, but I could see that she was carrying her sword, which indicated that she might have just arrived home. She usually didn’t have her sword when she was just hanging out in the palace.
“Princess! I…” I swallowed the pie in my mouth and tried to wipe around my lips with the back of my hand. “What are you doing out here?”
The princess cleared her throat and raised an eyebrow towards me. “Shouldn’t I be asking you that question? What are you doing in the Vale? Do you have news from Edgewood? News of the Freelands?”
I groaned and immediately felt self-conscious and unsure what to do with my hands or the half-eaten elven pie in one of them. I was stopping by the Vale primarily to see Adeelee, but I hadn’t really thought how I was going to explain that to her without coming off like some bumbling idiot showing up at his crush’s door for a surprise visit. When I processed it in my head, it actually sounded kind of creepy that I had walked all day with my primary mission to see her.
Trying to date girls without texting, social media, or even phones sure was tough.
“I umm… I came to see you?” I was making a statement, but I said it like I was asking a question, perhaps seeking some sort of lame assurance that she was cool with the whole thing. I turned to Ozzy, and while he was staring at Adeelee, he was still so absorbed in the elven pie, that I don’t think he caught my awkwardness.
“Came to see me?” Adeelee questioned.
I shrugged. “Yeah… I thought that we might be able to go on some adventures together.”
“Adventures? Do you have a quest in the Vale?”
“No, but um… There’s lots of stuff around the Vale, right? And there’s a treasure chest I’d like to check out. It’d be really cool if you came with.”
Adeelee looked surprised, but she said nothing for a few seconds. “Who is your friend?”
“Oh, yeah.” I waved a hand at Ozzy. “This is Ozzy. He’s a Reborn.” I watched as Ozzy shoved the last bit of elven pie into his mouth and practically swallowed it whole. “And Ozzy, this is Princess Adeelee of the High Elves.”
Ozzy slammed a fist into his chest and let out of a loud belch. “Damn, that was delicious,” he said right before he seemed to snap out of his trance. He nodded towards Adeelee. “Nice to meet you.”
“Another Reborn? Have you met any others?” Adeelee asked, ignoring Ozzy’s greeting.
“Just Aaron and Ozzy
so far,” I explained. “But Ozzy seems like a good guy.”
Adeelee nodded. “Let’s hope so.”
“So what do you say?” I asked. “A little adventuring? It looks like you’re already ready to go.”
“I just finished a little battle training with the Queen’s Army.” Adeelee lowered her eyes in thought. “It’s quite late for adventuring around the Vale… Carrying torches through the forest makes it quite a bit more dangerous as well.”
I grinned and raised my hand, casting Divine Sight on her.
She took a step back and raised her hand towards her face.
“I’ve grown a little since we last saw each other,” I gloated.
“It seems you have.” Adeelee smiled and let out a low sigh. “I suppose the night is young.” She looked almost pleased and a lot less serious than she usually was. I wasn’t sure if she was just in a good mood, but I couldn’t help but wonder if maybe my extra charisma points were helping me out.
“Great! Let me just stop by Rhys’ shop and grab a few essentials, then we can head out.”
“You should hurry, my nizzle,” Adeelee said. “He’ll probably be closing up soon.”
“My nizzle?” Ozzy raised an eyebrow and frowned.
I turned to Ozzy. “Ignore that. Are you cool? If you need to buy anything, we can buy it over there.”
Ozzy looked towards the elves in the water and then back towards the elven pie. “A slow night with another elven pie sounds a lot better, to be honest. I’m spent...” He tilted his head back and forth slowly. “But… I guess I want to see more of the forest too.”
“Cool. Let’s go.”
We hurried into Rhys’ shop, and when we arrived, the elf seemed to be straightening out his shop for the night. As usual, he seemed a bit surprised at humans coming to his shop, but when he recognized my face, he welcomed us with open arms.
My quiver was almost full, and I still had three bandages left, so I picked up two minor health potions and three food rations. Rhys also had some health potions that were more potent. They were more than twice the cost of the minor health potions, but since my HP had grown to 140, and I was battling stronger and stronger opponents, I could see how they would be useful. I decided to pick one up.
