Loreless: A Novel

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Loreless: A Novel Page 6

by P J Whittlesea


  Rob guided the car into the middle of the road and planted his foot heavily on the accelerator. The back of the vehicle fish-tailed and its wheels spun before finding traction. It swerved sideways across the road before straightening out. Billy felt as if he was being launched into space, with the world outside descending quickly into an impenetrable, inky blackness. The only light inside the car now came from the glow of the dashboard illuminating the occupants of the front seat. They seemed larger than normal and he felt small and distant, pinned as he was to the back of his seat. He felt a surge of panic before reminding himself that he was under the influence of the drug. His heartbeat slowed and he closed his eyes, trying to concentrate on something familiar. His girlfriend. He had to call his girlfriend. 'First thing I'm gonna do when I get to the town.'

  'Wha?'

  'Oh, sorry, nothing; just talking to myself.'

  Billy was grateful that he was shrouded in darkness and that Rob couldn't see the flush of embarrassment on his cheeks.

  'Betta keep tabs on that, mate. You know what they say 'bout talking to yourself?'

  'Yeah.'

  He felt a lump in his shirt pocket and was overjoyed to find another Mars Bar. The pangs of hunger were making themselves known once again. They vocalised their presence through the loud gurgling of his stomach. It took a few moments to extract the chocolate bar from its wrapper, as it had melted in its packaging. Having pulled it free he tossed the wrapper on the pile of rubbish at his feet. He wolfed it down, self-conscious that he hadn't offered any to Rob or Tex. He decided he was due for a decent meal and made a mental note to add that to his agenda for the evening. As the car sped down the road Billy hoped it wouldn't take too long to reach their destination.

  The Casino

  Billy was confounded. Here he was somewhere out in the desert, miles from anywhere, in the epicentre of nowhere, and he was being barred entrance because of a dress code. Surely the casino needed all the clientele it could lay its hands on. He looked up at a sign on the wall. It spelt out in bold, block letters:

  DRESS CODE:

  No thongs, no jeans, no collarless shirts.

  WE RESERVE THE RIGHT TO REFUSE SERVICE TO ANYONE.

  He was wearing torn jeans and his sneakers were a bit dusty, but they were both new. He wore a shirt with a collar. It was a flannelette shirt and needed a wash, but it was also in pretty good condition. He thought he looked quite fashionable; holey jeans were all the rage. After all, he wasn't a bricklayer by profession. A security man the size of a medium-sized family car had stopped him at the entrance and he had been separated from Rob and Tex. He stood in the foyer feeling somewhat exposed. There were lights everywhere. He could hear the tinkling of poker machines clanging away every time someone walked in or out through the sliding automatic doors to the main room.

  The place was not as appealing as he had first thought. He had been happy to arrive at what appeared to be a bastion of western civilisation. However, the short time he had spent in the wide open spaces had changed his attitude. He now felt hemmed in and not at all comfortable.

  Rob had said they were going there to play a bit of poker, but Billy really wasn't that interested. In the first place, he was terrible at the game and knew he would lose. It occurred to him that being barred from the place was a blessing in disguise. He would walk out of there with empty pockets if he stayed. Once inside he would get caught up in the whole thing and squander what little he had. He had already had enough surprises, and didn't want to wake up the next day totally destitute.

  Rob and Tex had already entered the club, so Billy felt as if he had lost his only lifeline. He considered his options. His head was still a little clouded from the marijuana but it was slowly clearing. He fought to get his thinking straight. To his relief Rob came back out of the casino. He was evidently looking for Billy and spotted him standing forlornly, alone in the centre of the foyer.

  'What's going on?'

  'They won't let me in.'

  Rob screwed up his face in a mixture of surprise and bewilderment. Billy indicated the sign on the wall and in a deadpan voice, filled with sarcasm, said, 'It seems I don't come up to their standards.'

  'You gotta be kiddin'.'

  Rob took a moment to think. He scrutinised Billy's attire and then looked down at himself. Billy noticed for the first time that Rob was actually quite smartly dressed. Even his boots were polished.

  'Think I've probably got some clothes for you in the car.'

  'It's ok. Don't think I want to go in there anyway.'

  'Ah, c'mon, no probs.'

  Abruptly Rob walked off towards the parking lot and his car. Billy followed reluctantly. At the car, Rob cracked open the boot and fumbled around inside. The distant street lighting made it hard to see anything, but the interior of the luggage space was coated in fine, red dust. Rob found what he was looking for and pulled out an old sports training bag. He slapped it a few times and a cloud of dust arose. They stood back to avoid it. Rob dumped the bag on the ground and another cloud of dust rose. He bent down, unzipped it and pulled out a pair of pants and a shirt. They didn't look as though they would fit.

  'Think I've got a pair of boots in here somewhere.'

  'Look, Rob, don't worry, mate. I'll wait out here. Not really into casinos anyway.'

  Rob looked hurt.

  'It's no big deal. We'll sort it out. C'mon, it'll be fun.'

  'Na, don't think it would be such a good idea. Don't have a lot of cash anyway.'

  'You won't need it. We'll look after you.'

  'No, it's ok, really. I'll just hang out here.'

  Rob could see he wasn't going to persuade Billy to change his mind. He stuffed everything back into the bag, zipped it up and, after dropping it in the boot, slammed the door shut. They both jumped out of the way of the rising pall of dust. Rob pulled his shirt away from his chest and shook off as much of the stuff as he could.

  'You sure? Last chance.'

  'Really, it's ok.'

  'Ok, suit yerself.'

  They walked slowly back to the entrance of the casino and into the foyer. The bright lights and tinkling machines engulfed them once more. It was like stepping into a different world.

  'I'll catch up with you later.'

  'No worries. Think I'll just have a wander around.'

  'Ok. We can crash later at a friend’s place. Car's open if you need anything.'

  'Thanks.'

  Rob walked back into the casino and was swallowed up by a cacophony of noise and flashing lights. Billy watched him go and then turned towards the door. Next to the main entrance was a yellow payphone, bolted to the wall. He hadn't noticed it before. He had also completely forgotten the main purpose of travelling to town with Rob. He still had to sort things out with his wife-to-be.

  Elizabeth, or Beth for short. That wasn't the only thing that was short about her. There was her diminutive stature; and then there was her quick temper. He had a very real and palpable fear of it. She could just go off. He had no defence against it. He could stand up for himself, but with her it was a different matter. Even the night out had to be negotiated in detail to forestall her wrath. He felt hemmed in by her. She was too controlling. He couldn't be entirely himself. He questioned if she was worth it. He used to think so. She could be the kindest person in the world. Once they had been inseparable and he was certain she was the one. Recently that had changed. He didn't know what it was. Maybe it was the pressure of the whole marriage thing. Deep down he knew it wasn't only that. He had doubts.

  It dawned on him that he hadn't even considered what he was going to say to her. It was going to require an enormous amount of tact. More than he possessed. He weighed up the situation. He was too late for the wedding, of that he was sure. She would not be in the mood for excuses. The whole idea of talking to her was daunting. Maybe she wasn't even home. He needed time to think. As he was already late it wouldn't matter if he waited a bit longer. The damage had already been done.

  The brightly
coloured phone seemed to be calling him over and urging him to face up to his responsibilities. He couldn't do it. He needed fresh air. The whole place was stifling. With all the noise and lights the room was closing in around him. He pulled his eyes away from the phone. Its colour yelled coward at him. He made a snap decision to make the call in the morning. He couldn't do it now. He had to get outside.

  Billy practically ran out the entrance. He was barely outside when he collided with Mabel. She had her head down and was fumbling in her purse.

  'Oops, sorry.'

  He shook his head. 'My mistake,' he said.

  'Hey, saw you today in the store. Billy wasn't it?'

  'Yep.'

  'Where you off too?'

  Billy took a moment to catch his breath. 'Dunno. Not in there, anyway. They wouldn't let me in.'

  'Really?'

  'Bad dress sense, according to them.'

  'Aah.'

  Mabel was clearly aware of the need to dress up for the place. On appraising her attire and make-up he concluded that she had gone above and beyond what was required. She looked fantastic.

  'Yeah, they're a bit picky around here. I was on my way to meet some girlfriends but they've piked. I thought, seeing that I was already here, I might as well have a quick look. But if you like we can go somewhere else?'

  Billy was taken aback. It surprised him how everyone he met here was more than willing to drop everything and spend time with him. He was also aware of Rob's feeling for her and was reluctant to step on his territory. She sensed his reservations and put them to rest.

  'It's not a date,' she said flatly.

  'Oh no, of course not,' he replied sheepishly.

  Billy was reassured, but still found it difficult to relate to her forwardness. Everyone was extremely open and friendly. It was something he couldn't quite come to terms with.

  'Got a car over here. Don't come into town much, but maybe we can just go for a drink somewhere.'

  Billy was grateful for the chance to put some distance between him and the telephone. It could wait.

  'Ok, you lead the way.'

  As they walked across the parking lot thunder growled ominously in the distance and echoed off the surrounding hills. The rain still hadn't come, but it couldn't be far off. He could now feel moisture hanging in the air. Billy was certain that when it finally did arrive the heavens would truly open.

  Line Dancing

  Not much time had passed since Billy had been in a public bar, but it felt like ages. Even though he had been a frequent visitor to such establishments, it seemed a strange environment after spending time in the community. As he and Mabel walked in they were confronted with an enormous bar. It stood at the far end of a large room and stretched along one wall. The rest of the cavernous room was remarkably sparse except for a scattering of tables and chairs. The bar itself took on the appearance of an island, well lit, warm and cosy, whereas the rest of the room was dimly lit, cold and uninviting. As they walked across the room towards the bar they passed a group of people dressed in cowboy clothing. Some were wearing Stetsons. About twenty of them sat together at a long table. They were huddled in deep conversation over their drinks.

  Mabel and Billy each pulled a stool up to the bar. The bar itself was very solid, constructed entirely of old, jarrah railway sleepers, sanded and polished to a high gloss. It was massive, thick and unyielding, but the colour of the wood made it appear soft and malleable, almost like clay. Seated at one end of the bar was a lone, long-haired Aboriginal man wearing a heavy jacket and quietly sipping a beer. He barely acknowledged their presence. The bartender, a man in his late forties, very tall and built as solidly as the bar, asked what they wanted to drink. They both ordered beer and, for a moment, stared at their own reflections in the long mirror behind the bar.

  Mabel broke the silence. 'So, what brings you up this way? You're from Adelaide, aren't you?'

  'Yeah, this is a bit out of the way for me.' Billy took a long look at Mabel and decided he could confide in her. 'It's a bit embarrassing, really. I was out with my mates and had a bit too much to drink. From what I can work out they stuffed me in a bus and I woke to find myself here. Well, not actually here. Rob kind of found me wandering around out on the highway. I guess you know the rest.'

  In fact, the rest was so much more, but Billy really didn't want to go into it. He was just getting to know Mabel and it didn't feel right to burden her with all his problems.

  'Yeah, he told me he nearly ran you over and that you seemed a bit lost.'

  'Lost doesn't even begin to sum up my predicament.'

  Their conversation was interrupted by the bartender arriving with their drinks. The glasses were extremely well chilled. Icy vapour rose from them.

  'I'll get these if you like?'

  Billy, who was painfully aware of his financial situation, responded with a grateful 'Thanks.'

  'So what are your plans?'

  'Finding a way home is pretty high on the agenda. Think I'll make some calls in the morning then head home. Not really sure what I should do around here anyway. None of this was planned, you know.'

  Mabel appeared to consider this for a moment. 'What's the big hurry? I mean, you’re here now. You might as well have a look around. I'm sure if you wanted to hang around for a few days someone'd put you up.'

  Billy was unconvinced. 'I'll have a think about it.'

  He swung around on his barstool and surveyed the rest of the room. Behind them the patrons at the long table were standing up and had started moving some of the furniture against a far wall. The bartender, leaning on the bar behind them, enquired if everything was to their liking.

  Billy turned to face him. 'We're fine, thanks. What's going on?'

  'Oh, it's the weekly line dancing meeting.'

  'Line dancing?' Billy chuckled to himself. He didn't even know that this sort of thing went on in Australia. He thought it only happened in America. It reinforced his impression that he had found himself in the Wild West. One of the line dancers, a woman in her early forties, who was decked out in full country-and-western regalia, stomped up to the bar and began chatting with the barman. He made some adjustments to the control panel of a sound system mounted on the back wall. When he flipped a few switches on another panel next to it, the lighting in the room changed dramatically. The place was transformed into a kind of disco. Small, multicoloured lights on the ceiling flashed on and off in an irregular pattern. In the centre of the room a miniature mirror ball twirled above the dance floor. The woman peered intently at another console at the far end of the bar and hit a button. Country music erupted at high volume from speakers suspended above the bar. Billy Ray Cyrus began crooning about his achy breaky heart.

  As the chorus kicked in Billy groaned. The song had been playing on high rotation on radio at home, and he found it profoundly irritating. He and Mabel took one look at each other and slid further up the bar, away from the din. They sat next to the lone man who was still engrossed in his beer. Mabel seemed to know him but avoided looking at him. She half turned away from him and Billy and watched the dancers. They had formed into three neat, parallel lines and were slapping their heels in time to the music.

  Billy ignored them. He turned to the man and asked where he was from. He mumbled back over his glass. 'Hermannsburg.'

  The name was familiar to Billy but he couldn't quite place it.

  The man noticed his confusion. 'It's where Albert Namatjira's from. He was my uncle, by the way.'

  'Wow, really?'

  Billy knew a little about Albert Namatjira, mainly because when he was a child one of his prints had hung on his bedroom wall. He had seen a similar print on the wall of the hut he had stayed in at the community. Although he didn't know much about the painter, he knew he had been widely respected for his striking artwork.

  'Had to show a film crew 'round out there today.'

  'Oh yeah? What were they doing?'

  'Mak'n a documentary 'bout my uncle.'

  The m
an seemed reasonably friendly so Billy asked him if he wanted a drink. He acknowledged with a slight nod. Billy relaxed and decided to stretch his self-imposed budget. He felt like something stronger.

  'Would you like a whiskey?'

  'Ok.'

  'And how about you, Mabel?'

  Mabel was still engrossed in the line dancers and took a moment to respond. 'Huh? Oh, no thanks. I'll just have a beer.'

  Billy waved the barman over and ordered a beer and two whiskeys. Mabel quietly accepted her drink and continued watching the line dancers. Billy raised his glass to the man who returned the gesture. He downed his whiskey in one go and then moved back to his beer. Billy sipped thoughtfully on his. 'So, are you a bit of a guide then?'

  'No, not really. I just know a bit about my uncle and those people wanted a bit of info.'

  'I'm kind of new up here myself. Maybe you could show me around a bit?'

  The man was noncommittal. 'Maybe.'

  'Must be kinda cool being related to Albert Namatjira. Did you know him well?'

  The man didn't react for a time and stared blankly at his drink. Slowly his body language changed and he appeared to stiffen. When he replied his tone had changed dramatically. 'You know what? You people are all the same. You come up here and think you can just take whatever you like. You get what you want and then leave, and what do we see for it?'

 

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