“Thanks, Mom.” Winnie beams. “You’re sure you don’t want to come? I bet there’s another prom dress in that closet. Lord knows Jessica went to enough of them.”
She waves her hand dismissively. “Oh, posh. You don’t want an old lady ruining your good time. It’s nice that you’re both going, and that I kept that dress.” Her brows rise as she smiles.
“Yes, your hoarding tendencies did us well this time,” I say.
“It’s called being thrifty, Jessica. One does what we must when we need to.”
Instead of fighting her, I walk over and kiss her cheek. “I’m glad you saved it. Even if I can’t breathe.”
She laughs softly. “A woman who wants to be beautiful usually must suffer for it.”
“This is true,” Winnie agrees. “I will either pee my pants or hold it all night because none of this can be adjusted.”
I roll my eyes at my sister, who is a far cry from heavy.
“Be home by midnight,” Mom says, causing us to turn and look at her. “Oh, sorry, old habits.”
We giggle and head out to Winnie’s car, which thankfully, has the top up already. I look at the seat, wondering if I should sit.
Winnie does the same, her gaze meeting mine above the roof. “If we bust a gut now, at least we’ll have an excuse not to go.”
“If we bust a gut, I may cry.”
“On the count of three?”
I nod.
“One,” she starts.
“Two.”
We watch each other, and then she says the final count. “Three.”
Slowly, we get into our seats without any incident. However, breathing is damn near impossible. The problem isn’t so much the waist area as it is the chest. I was not as . . . endowed at seventeen as I am now.
Everything in town is about fifteen minutes away, so breathing shallowly is doable. Winnie and I don’t say much, probably because neither of us can move without fear of tearing something or want to waste what little air we can pull in, and when we get out of the car at the Park Inn, I feel dizzy.
“Winnie . . .”
She left out the part about it being held here. How I missed it on the event calendar, I don’t know. I’ve been off the last two days and all that was there on this day was: family party.
I should’ve known.
“It’s the nicest place in the county, Jess. Where do you think Eveline would host it?”
“I wasn’t thinking.”
She comes around to my side of the car. “Look, I know she’s a vile bitch, but she has money, and my charity needs it. You’re not with Grayson anymore, so there’s no reason for her to be a bitch. Not to mention, Stella won’t hesitate to say something.”
“Is Gray going to be here?”
She shrugs. “I doubt it. He never comes to stuff like this. Why? Do you want him to be?”
I give her a look that clearly says I want to kill her. “I’m wearing the dress I wore to the last event we attended together. No, I don’t want him to be.”
Winnie laughs. “If it was the dress you wore the first time you put out, would you want a repeat?”
Yes.
“No.”
Her hand rests on my forearm. “I know you’re nervous, but he shouldn’t be here. Grayson avoids his mother as much as possible.”
“Because she’s a horrible person, and she’s going to make me feel stupid.”
“Jessica, she can’t make you feel stupid. You’re not the same person anymore. Listen, tonight will be fun. We’ll go in, eat fancy food, dance, drink—well, you can’t have alcohol but I will—and have a good time on their dime. Okay?”
When did my little sister, who used to steal my clothes and rat me out for sneaking Grayson into the house, become this wise woman?
“Okay.”
“That’s my girl. Also, who cares what she thinks? She’s miserable and inconsequential in our lives.”
Winnie is right. There’s nothing that Eveline can say or do at this point that would really matter. I’m not a young girl, wishing her boyfriend’s mother would like me even after she’d made it abundantly clear it would never happen.
“I know, but there’s this young girl inside me who hasn’t figured that out yet.”
“I’m happy to kick her ass.” She winks and then loops her arm in mine.
Winnie and I were never close as kids. The relationship was always me taking care of her, not getting to be her friend, and then I left Willow Creek. I turned away from the people I loved as a way to protect myself from everyone. I won’t be that selfish now.
My sister asked me to come. She wanted me to see this—see her. I don’t care if I have to walk on glass, I’m going to stand beside her.
“I’m proud of you, Win.”
Her head tilts back. “Why?”
“Because you’re you.”
She smiles, a bit of moisture gathers in her eyes. “I missed you, Jess.”
I gather my sister in my arms. The crash may have destroyed and taken so much from me, but it also gave me gifts. My sister. My mother. Forgiveness between people I never thought possible.
I’ve gained too, and Winnie is right, Eveline Parkerson can’t take anything away if I don’t let her.
“Okay, enough of this,” Winnie says as she dabs at her eyes. “I’m going to be splotchy and I need to be stunning.”
“Don’t worry, you’re stunning.”
Arm in arm, we walk into the lion’s den. The Park Inn has always been beautiful, but tonight, it sparkles. There are crystals hung around the entrance of the lobby with tons of candles strategically placed. I haven’t been to a wedding here in forever, but that’s what I’m reminded of.
When we get into the sitting room area, it’s been converted into a bar area, and one of the front desk staff is working to pour drinks and fill orders. She waves, and I do the same.
Winnie says hello to a few of her work friends and introduces me. I can feel my stress-level rising, but I stay calm and focus on keeping my answers short.
When we enter the main event room, which was a huge addition built after I left town, I can’t stop the smile that forms when I see an old friend.
“If my eyes are playing tricks on me, it’s the best one yet,” Alex says as he pulls me into his arms.
“You are the same as ever.”
He lifts one shoulder and kisses my cheek. “I heard you were back and looking even hotter than when we were kids.”
“I am—back, that is,” I add on.
Alex wraps his arm around me, holding me to his side. “And I also heard you’re working here.”
“Right again,” I say.
He shakes his head. “I’m sure that’s . . . fun.”
“That’s one word for it.”
Alex takes a step back, tugging me gently to let someone pass. “I won’t say the word I’d use for being summoned back here by my asshole father and my viper of a mother.”
“Fun?” I offer.
He drains the amber liquid in his glass. “Definitely not. This fucking place makes my skin crawl.”
“So, you’re glad you’re not here?”
He laughs. “Sweetheart, I would’ve burned the fucking place down if I had to stay.”
I don’t remember Alex being openly hostile about his parents when he was a kid. None of them were ever openly loving, but neither did they seem hostile—well, except Josh. He was the first sibling to take off to another location, which coincided with a certain incident with my best friend.
“I take it things in the Parkerson house are tense?”
Alex waves over someone from the waitstaff I don’t know, requesting another whiskey neat.
“They’re always tense. I don’t know how Grayson and Stella do it.”
I look around the room and spot another Parkerson. God, I hope Delia isn’t here, or this will be bad for everyone. “Are you all here tonight?”
Alex laughs once. “You mean is Grayson here tonight?”
“I d
idn’t ask that. I just saw Josh.”
The waiter is back, giving him another drink. He puts his glass down on the table, looking around the room. “We’re all in town. Oliver is leaving tonight, so you might get to see him before he goes. Josh and I are gone first thing in the morning.”
“Did you see Delia?”
“She’s here.”
“Great,” I mutter.
“Yeah, she saw Josh already and then told me she had to make a phone call.” Alex and Delia’s relationship went from best friends to estranged after Josh left. Alex and Josh look the most alike, and I didn’t think she could take it.
“I should go find her.”
He nods, grabs his drink, and takes a long sip. “I’m going to get another drink and avoid my parents as much as possible. It was good to see you, Jess.”
I give him another hug. “It’s always good to see you.”
He leaves, and I realize he didn’t say anything about Grayson. Not that it matters, but when I know I’m going to see him, there’s a level of preparation I feel is healthy.
I walk the room, talking to a few people from town I haven’t seen since I’ve been back. I focus a lot on breathing and keeping calm. It’s been the key to speaking without any missteps, and the more in control I am, the better.
“Jessica, I wasn’t sure you’d show,” Eveline says. She is gorgeous in a black cocktail dress. Of all the insults one could wield against her, her beauty isn’t one.
“Winnie is my sister and I wouldn’t miss this for her.”
She smiles at someone behind me. “We don’t normally allow staff here, but I guess it’s fine since it’s family and all. You’re not senior enough to attend otherwise.”
I bite my tongue, knowing that if I cause a scene it would be bad for me. The time I’ve worked at this job has helped me tremendously. It’s like physical therapy for my brain, and I won’t lose it unless it’s on my terms.
“Of course.” She clears her throat, obviously hoping I would’ve given her a different answer. I use her momentary discomfort for my benefit. “You look lovely, Mrs. Parkerson. Truly. As does the inn. I’m sure you’ll raise a lot of money for the charity.”
My mother always said the best way to beat a bully was with kindness. We’ll find out here.
Her eyelashes bat a few times, and she takes a sip of her champagne. “Yes, well, I appreciate the compliment. It’s a great organization.”
Stella approaches, looking like a younger version of the woman in front of me. How she’s single is a mystery to me. “Mother, I was looking for you.” Her smile is there, but her eyes are apologetic as they dart my way. “Dad is in the office and really needs to make an appearance.”
Eveline shakes her head and then straightens her back. “I’ll handle him.”
“Thank you,” Stella says with a grin. Without another word, Eveline leaves. “I’m so sorry, I didn’t see her near you or I would’ve gotten here faster.”
I always loved Stella. “You’re fine. It wasn’t a big deal.”
She grabs my arm and steps back, looking over my dress. “Please tell me that is not your prom dress.”
I groan. “You remember my prom dress?”
Stella covers her mouth, smothering a laugh. “That photo of you and Gray was in his room. Of course I remember.”
“I promise, it was not by choice.”
“Stop it, you look amazing. I’m more impressed that you fit in it.”
“Anyway,” I say, hoping we can stop talking about it. “Have you seen Delia?”
Stella’s eyes move over to another side of the room. “Yeah, she’s doing her best to ignore Josh. Last I saw she was out by the lookout.”
“I’m going to find her. Thank you for saving me.”
“Any time.”
The air is a little cooler than when we arrived, and I rub my hands up and down my arms to create some warmth. It was stupid of me not to bring a coat.
I somehow navigate my way to the lookout without breaking an ankle, but Delia isn’t here.
But I don’t turn to leave, too caught up in gazing at the moon that shines so big and bright. It’s incredible, and I can’t look away.
“There you are!” Delia’s voice breaks the silence of the night.
“Hey. I was looking for you.”
Her head drops back, and she drains the entire glass of wine in one gulp. Oh, God. This is what I was afraid of. “Why would you care about me? He doesn’t.”
“You saw Josh?”
She laughs once and tosses the glass off the side of the cliff. “I sure did. Bastard pretends like we’re nothing.”
“Did more happen that you never told me about?” I ask, suddenly feeling like I’m missing something because one kiss almost twenty years ago doesn’t really scream committed relationship.
She laughs. “You mean did we have sex? No. We’ve gotten close, but in the last two years, he’s done nothing but push me away.”
Oh, this is bad. “Delia, you guys . . .”
Her eyes are filled with tears. “I’ve been in love with him my entire life, and all he does is look at me like I’m some stupid little girl. Do I look like a little girl anymore?”
“No,” I say carefully. “But you are getting a bit too close to the edge there.”
Her eyes dart to the side, and she steps toward me. That’s at least a good sign. “All he cares about is work and . . . he doesn’t care. He doesn’t see that I love him. I love him, Jess. Not like you love Grayson, but like, I would die for him.”
“Yes, but I’d rather you didn’t do that.” The wind whips around me, causing my hair to fly in my face and a shiver to crawl over my skin. “Come on, let’s go inside and get you some water.”
“No,” Delia says with defiance. “I’m not going back in there so he can pat me on the head again.”
“He patted you on the head?”
She nods. “Like I was the same age as Amelia.” Her voice breaks at the end, and she crumples in my arms.
I hold my friend, hating that she’s in pain. “You may love him, but why?”
She sniffs and then looks back at the event room. “Because he’s everything I want. Because he made me feel beautiful, special, and he talked to me for hours that night we kissed. It was like the world was right and it’s never been the same since then.”
I pull her along with me, guiding her back to the warmth of the building. “He doesn’t deserve you if he doesn’t see you for the woman you are now.”
“Tell my heart that.”
I pull her in for a hug, both of our teeth chattering from the cold. “I know better than anyone that our hearts don’t listen to our heads.”
“And what does your heart cry out for?” Delia asks.
Grayson. Always Grayson.
“Something I can’t have.”
Chapter 14
Jessica
My phone pings with a text, and I grin.
Jacob: So, how is my favorite headcase?
Me: Good! No headaches in a week!
Jacob: That’s great. How about the nightmares?
Yeah, that part is no different.
Me: Same.
My phone rings and Jacob’s face fills the screen.
“Hey.”
“Hey. So, the nightmares are still bad?” he asks.
Jacob, Elliot, and Jose are the only people who can really understand what I’m dealing with. We lived it together and had to come out on the other side. I don’t remember that much after I bashed my head, but I do know that, if it weren’t for those three men, I would’ve died. And for that, I owe them and am always honest about what’s going on.
“Yeah, but my doctor thinks it’s normal, and they’re not getting worse, at least.”
“Still.”
“Yeah, still.”
“What’s new in Willow Creek?” he asks.
I fill him in on the job, the beach trip, and the charity dinner that Grayson didn’t attend. Jacob listens, asking a few qu
estions here and there. Mostly, we discuss how I had to practically carry Delia out of there and have Alex drive us home.
For hours, she alternated between crying in my arms and getting sick from drinking too much. I hated seeing her like that. She was so sad and I wished I could make it better.
“How about in Sugarloaf?”
“We decided that I’m going to stay here.”
“I knew you would.”
He chuckles. “Well, I’m going to surprise Brenna by renovating the house. Melanie needs her own bathroom, and I know Brenna would like a bigger bedroom.”
“That’s sweet.”
“The things we do for the people we love, right?”
“And the pain we suffer . . .”
Jacob goes quiet for a minute. “Are you suffering?”
I shift in my seat. “No. I’m fine. Everything is how it should be. Things are looking up now that I’m working, and my stuttering is so much less. I even endured a party without one slip up.”
I’m really proud of that. I’ve been working a lot on focus and I think that’s really helping. The doctors said it’s a muscle that needed not only to heal but also be trained on how to function again. With the help of my neurologist and Dr. Warvel, I’ve been treating both sides.
“I’m really glad it’s working.” I can hear the happiness in his voice. “Listen, I wanted to ask you something.”
“You can ask me anything.”
He sighs. “Okay, my premiere is in about two months and I’d like for you guys to all be there. My family is going, and I’m planning something huge for Brenna.”
I grin, knowing exactly what he’s planning. “You’re going to propose?”
“Yes.”
“Good! The way you did it the first time was an epic failure.”
“No shit,” he agrees.
Jacob asked her the night after he returned or something ridiculous. Brenna, being a therapist, asked him to wait on it. I was incredibly proud of her for not just going with it. Although, anyone who turns down Jacob Arrowood has to be a little crazy because he’s Hollywood’s most beloved actor.
“Are you going all out?”
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