by Lexy Wolfe
Looking at the sky, Ash grimaced at the setting sun as it seemed to kiss the horizon. Ash walked quietly to Nolyn's side to wait. With great reluctance, Ash finally interrupted the long silence. "Nolyn?"
"I lost the trail," Nolyn finally admitted, standing. "She was here, though. There are two clear prints in the mud by the spring where the animal drank. Until I can see better and tell which way they went from here, I cannot tell if she was riding or not. She may have sent him off to distract pursuers like us." Taking both horse's reins, Nolyn led them to the spring to let them drink before leading them to the side to secure for the night.
"No, she is with him," Ash stated, willing himself to believe his own words. "He is the one being in the world she will never turn away from. The only one she trusts more than anyone else." The wind gusted briefly, the cold reminding Ash of the danger to the missing desert-born woman, tightening his hands around her abandoned cloak. "I have to find her before she freezes to death."
Both men turned abruptly at the sound of a rattling hiss. Nolyn drew his bow as a spyric emerged from the shadows. "Hold still," he murmured. "They hunt by movement and loud sounds."
Four long, needle-like spindly legs supported a spider-like body the size of a man's torso as the creature climbed over the half buried root. Four red eyes glowed malevolently as it hissed at the two. "Spyrics aren't supposed to get that big," Ash pointed out under his breath.
"Tell him that," Nolyn replied flatly. The two men held very still, the creature pausing in its advance as it tried to seek them out again, the rustling of the nervous horses distracting it. "They hunt in pairs. Where is the other one?" Nolyn's answer came from behind them. Without warning, Nolyn dove at Ash, pushing him out of the way of the creature's mate, screaming out as one of the spindly legs impaled his thigh.
Ash rolled out of the way, eyes wide as he stared at his spirit brother. Nolyn struggled to suppress his pain and draw his bow. "Nolyn!"
Nolyn loosed an arrow which embedded itself in one of the smaller eyes of the creature. Its shriek of rage and pain filled the air as it reared, pulling its limb out of Nolyn's leg and staggered backwards. "Get out of here, Ash!"
Ash knelt by Nolyn, casting a spell that buffeted the creatures away. They were flung against the farther trees, but it barely slowed them down, the two stalking towards them. "Come on, Nolyn," he said, pulling the man to his feet as the uninjured spyric was distracted by the tethered horses closer to it than the men.
Nolyn grimaced as Ash tried to get his arm under his shoulders. "Ash, you're the Illaini Magus. You're more important than me. I'll just slow you down. Get out of here!"
"I will not abandon my brother!"
Suddenly, a familiar, unearthly sound pierced their ears from behind and the drizar leapt over their heads to challenge the spyrics. Fearlessly, he slashed his horns at the creatures, dodging the pointed legs and gnashing mandibles with impossible nimbleness. The spyrics hissed, backing away from the unexpected challenger, unable to move fast enough for either of them to get behind him.
Storm ran towards the monsters with a cry of her own, twin blades blurs as they sliced through the bony legs as if they were butter. The one she attacked tried to lunge at her to bite, but its jaws only wrapped around one blade as she brought the other up to slice it from its abdomen past its throat.
Dodging its staggering body, she ran to a root to gain height and leapt on the back of the half blinded one attacking the drizar, both swords turned down to stab it through the head. Rolling off as it collapsed, she ended up back on her feet in a crouch, looking around for any other threats. Once assured there were no other predators, both she and the drizar savaged the twitching bodies, skewering and stomping them until they finally stopped moving completely.
The drizar proclaimed his victory to the world, the two Forenten men wincing at the volume of the dissonant cry. Focused on Nolyn, Ash did not see Storm turn away from them. Weak from blood loss, Nolyn clutched the front of Ash's robes desperately. "Ash...!" Swallowing, he whispered, "Stop her."
Looking up sharply, Ash's eyes went wide when Storm began to mount the drizar. "Storm, wait!" She barely hesitated, the only acknowledgement she gave his call. "We need your help. Nolyn's badly hurt."
The woman froze for several moments before turning her green-gold eyes on the Illaini Magus, then to Nolyn. Growling under her breath, she dropped to the ground and turned back to them. "Why should it matter to me what happens to defilers?" she asked even as she knelt to examine Nolyn's wound.
Nolyn grimaced, his knee buckling. "Too dark to travel now," he stated through gritted teeth. "Must... must camp."
"He is losing much blood." Animosity gone in the need of the moment, Storm took off her headband and deftly wrapped it around Nolyn's leg. The man could not completely suppress a cry of pain as she cinched it tight to slow the blood loss. She stood and walked towards the shadow of a root. "There is shelter here. Not enough room for four of us and the horses. The horses will need to remain outside."
Nolyn blinked blearily as he stumbled beside Ash. "Four of us?"
"Don't worry about it, Nolyn." Ash half-carried the man to the small cave-like ground hollow. He murmured words of magic, creating a small ball of light that clung to the low ceiling, illuminating the space. He eased the man down to sit as Storm crouched and lithely slipped into the hollow.
The woman tried to be as careful as she could manage, grimacing when Nolyn cried out involuntarily as the Swordanzen dragged him inside. She turned her attention on cleaning the wound, ignoring Ash completely.
Getting out of the way of the drizar as the animal crouched down to shimmy his way into the hollow, Ash went back to the horses, setting wards around the clearing before getting the gear and bringing it to the shelter. When he returned, he blinked to see the drizar had pressed himself to the far side of the shelter away from Nolyn, watching Storm work and leaving plenty of room for Ash to come in as well. He shook his head sharply at how such a large, vicious beast could be so flexible as to make himself so compact and fit in this confined space.
Storm had cut away part of Nolyn's trousers to expose the wound, grimacing. "The injury goes completely through," she informed Ash as the man knelt beside her. "I have cleaned it, but even if I could burn it enough to close it, he will lose the leg or die of bleeding inside." She put her hand on the man's brow. "And he is getting battle fever." The mage was startled at the open, untarnished worry in the normally acerbic woman's eyes. "Without the medicines from Desantiva, I can do no more to help him."
"No. I will not lose him." Dropping the gear, Ash moved to Storm's side, pushing his sleeves up. "Hold him down," Ash ordered curtly as he put his hands over Nolyn's leg. Storm did so as the mage started to murmur, focusing on the vicious wound. Suddenly, the injured man cried out in agony. Storm grimaced as she fought to keep him still while Ash mended the wound, the harshness of Forenten magic forcing the wound closed but with incredible amounts of pain. Mercifully, Nolyn blacked out well before Ash was done.
Finishing his work, Ash sat back on his heels, breathing heavily. Flexing his right hand that ached with the echo of Nolyn's agony, Ash wiped the tears from his cheeks. "I am sorry I am no healer, Nolyn," he whispered. The twisted flesh of the wound was ugly, but it no longer threatened Nolyn's life. Ash watched Storm as she rested her hand on Nolyn's damp brow. "He will live," Ash told her quietly. "Thanks to you." Storm scowled at him, slapping away his hand when he tried to touch her shoulder. Turning away from him, she went to sit against the drizar, curling against him and away from Ash. "Storm—"
"I do not want your thanks," Storm stated tonelessly. "I want nothing from you."
Ash sighed, sitting near Nolyn, his hand on the guardsman's shoulder. An hour passed in tense silence. Ash relaxed as he felt Nolyn shift from pain induced unconsciousness to merely sleep. Turning his attention to the woman, he felt a pang of shame as she stared outside, her eyes like an open wound. "Storm..." He fell silent, not knowing where to begin. Fi
nally, he said simply, sincerely, "I am sorry."
Abruptly, Storm turned to face him, kneeling because of the low ceiling and glaring at him as if she would leap at him and rip his throat out with her bare hands. "Lies! All your words are lies! You never mean what you say!" He was surprised to see the glitter of unshed tears in her eyes. "You only say what you think I want to hear so I will do what you want me to do. Like I am a slave to do what you command."
"Storm, wait. Listen to me," Ash began.
"No! I am done listening to you. You listen to me now!" Storm fired back. "You said you wanted to learn about my people, and I believed you. My people are proud because we survive where no others could. But you do not see our victory. You see us as flawed and broken. You think we are worthless and try to make us like you! You want us to eat and sleep and do everything like Forenten just because we are in Forenta. But Skyfire and I are not Forenten! I do not want to be Forentan. I am Desanti!"
"I know you are, Storm," Ash said quietly. "I care about you, Storm. Regardless if you are Desanti." He half raised his hand as if to reach for her, stopping when she reached for her knife. "I care about you more than I have words to express it."
Storm shook her head sharply. "Liar! You care for no one but yourself!"
Ash frowned slightly at the accusations sitting forward himself but restraining the urge to grab and shake her until she stopped. "You know that is not true!" he returned hotly.
"Is it not?" Storm demanded. "You look at me and see only flaws. Flaws your ancestors created. You are ashamed when you see me because the only thing you think about is how what your ancestors had done reflects on Forenta. Your desire to 'fix' me has nothing to do with me. It is only so you can pretend the Great War never happened."
"Storm," Ash tried to interrupt, flinching as her words cut him with their accuracy.
"I know my people are flawed. I know I am flawed! But you never asked how we lived with the void left in our souls because of your ancestors. How we adapted and survived when we should have died. You do not see our strengths. You do not see our ability to survive. Just our flaws. As if we should be ashamed our souls are incomplete. Yes, we hate being lacking, but what happened is the past. Dwelling on the past is only a path to madness and death. We focus on the present and surviving."
Trembling with fury, Storm snatched a clod of dirt and flung it at Ash. The mage raised his arm defensively, flinching as dirt showered him. "Selfish, narrow-minded, self-important tyrant. If you truly cared about me, you would care about Desantiva because I live for them! They are the only family I have left! But you. You would not care if they died because all that matters to you is what you control."
Storm paused for a moment, glaring at him. "You see no beauty in how things are. Everything to you must be fixed or changed to suit you!" She turned away from him as she said, "My father made me stay to teach you about Desanti and I have failed. I cannot teach someone who refuses to listen! I failed Him. I failed Almek." Looking away from Ash, she said with infinite weariness, "I deserve nothing but to be forever alone."
The word 'alone' struck Ash, rousing the confusing tangle of emotions Thandar had imparted to him. He knew if he let Storm go now, it meant her death. Ash pressed his lips together, lowering his eyes in humility. "No, I did not ask you. I did not listen when you tried to teach me. I failed to live up to my goddess's laws to learn objectively by holding all up to Forentan expectations. I have dishonored you and I am sorry." He looked at her as she drew back a little at the unexpected heartfelt admission, watching him distrustfully. "Do not punish yourself anymore, Storm. The failure was not yours. It was mine."
Storm drew back sharply from his reaching hand, circling away from him. "You lie," she stated, though the insistent tone was not as strident as it had been.
"You know I am speaking the truth, Storm." Shaking his head, he held her gaze as he spoke quietly. "I allowed my arrogance to blind me, to twist my thoughts to think the only right way was what I believed to be right." He moved slowly towards her, approaching her like the skittish tri-tailed deer he and Nolyn used to approach as boys to try to pet. He kept his voice low, soothing. "I do not want your people to die. And I cannot live without you in my life, Storm. Let me earn your forgiveness. Please."
Storm looked away. "No. I can believe nothing you say."
Ash reached out suddenly, grabbed her wrist, and pulled her towards him. He caught her other wrist, barely keeping her from drawing a blade and held her tightly as she struggled. With some effort, he pulled Storm close and wrapped his arms around her, holding her tightly. He grimaced as she struggled, pummeling his back and spitting epithets at him. As much as the physical blows hurt, what hurt him most was having so utterly lost her trust that she was unable or unwilling to feel the truth of his regret through physical contact as she would normally.
In desperation, Ash released the Desanti woman abruptly. While she was stunned at the unexpected action, he grabbed her right hand without thinking, meshing their fingers together as he pressed his palm against hers. Covering their clasped hands with his other hand, he bowed his head and whispered harshly, "Please, you must believe me." He fought back tears as he focused on Thandar's intense, emotion-laden message to him, letting the barriers around his mind drop.
Storm froze, eyes wide in shock. He allowed her to sit back on her heels as she stared at their clasped hands, her expression unreadable. "...Thandar spoke to you?" He nodded mutely, watching her. He raised his other hand to touch her cheek in comfort, stopping when she raised her free hand in a halting motion. "Desantiva suffers... because of me?"
Ash started to speak when she pulled her hand away from his, but fell silent as he watched her face, her eyes unfocusing as she murmured in Swordanzen. He knew the moment the Totani was able to reach his Githalin by the strange pressure that made the air itself feel heavy. Biting back a cry of pain, Storm hunched over and clutched her shoulder, speaking through clenched teeth. He couldn’t understand her words, but he could hear the emotion in her voice. Regret. Apology. Accusation. Resignation. Unable to do anything to help, he put his hand on her shoulder, wishing he could ease her pain.
As the link to the Totani faded, Ash looked at Storm worriedly. Hunched over, wracked with dry sobs, Storm was left shuddering and miserable. Ash drew her into his embrace, rocking her as her breathing eased slowly to shuddering gasps. He covered her with her cloak, holding her close.
"I'm sorry, Storm," he murmured into her hair. "I'm so sorry I pushed you to have to suffer this. I promise I will change my old habits and listen from now on and not judge your people."
Storm made an odd sound in her throat. He could not tell if she laughed or cried. "You lie to yourself if you believe your words, treewalker."
He could not help but laugh and amended, "Very well. I will try to change my old ways of thinking and listen to you from now one and not judge your people. Forgive me when I fail now and then. I am only human."
"I will try," Storm said with such uncharacteristic weariness, Ash tightened his arms around her protectively. "I will try to be more accepting of your strange Northern ways. But I cannot change what I am. Desanti are not like Forenten. We are what we are. We have to be to survive." She added, more to herself, "I will not fail my father again."
"You won't. I promise you." As he settled his back against the hollow wall, pulling his cloak around to cover her as she fell asleep with her head on his chest, Ash murmured, "Peace, my Swordanzen."
Chapter 34
Nolyn groaned as he finally awoke, looking around in bleary disorientation. He gasped as he shifted his injured leg, swearing under his breath. Feeling slender fingers touching his brow, he looked to see Storm kneeling over him. "Storm?" With a sense of desperation, he reached out to clasp her hand in both of his. A surge of relieved gratitude flooded the injured man. "You are here. Oh, thank the goddess I wasn't dreaming we found you."
Storm almost smiled, gently but firmly removing her hand from his grasp. "No, it was no fe
ver dream." Gentle, calloused fingers brushed his hair back from his brow. "Your battle fever broke shortly after Ash closed your wound." She helped him sit up and lean against the root wall, taking a sip from her water skin before offering it to him. "Drink. It is bitter, but it will ease the pain."
Taking a long sip, he gagged at the taste, eyeing the water skin speculatively. "What is in that? It tastes horrid!"
"Blisarj leaf." Storm closed the water skin, setting it by his hand. "It must be used sparingly. Too much at once is poisonous." Noting his expression, Storm finally did smile. "Relax. I have no desire to inflict poisoning on anyone else. I did not use much. You could drink all of that and it would do you no harm." She settled back, sitting cross-legged between him and Ash. "If it is used too often, it will have no effect. Use it only when the pain is unbearable."
Nolyn made a musing noise, taking another long drag on the water skin before leaning back and closing his eyes, feeling the pain slowly disappear. "Thank you. I might live now." He could feel her eyes on him and opened one eye to see her horrified stare. "Are all Desanti so literal? It is a joke. I meant to say I feel much better now."
"Oh," Storm said dubiously. "You're welcome. I think."
Keeping his eye half opened, he watched as she tended to her weapons with ritualistic precision. He repressed a small smile when she looked over at Ash and tugged his cloak back over him. As the pain eased to numbness, he felt lethargy pulling him back to sleep. He smiled a little as Storm tugged his cloak back around him, too.
Storm studied Ash as he slept soundly. "It is strange, drizar. One moment he is strong and wise. He is a great man that I cannot help but admire. The next moment, he's inflexible and arrogant. He thinks he knows everything and I just want to..." She shook her head sharply. "He will make complete sense one moment, and the rest of the time he's infuriatingly baffling." Sighing heavily, she reached out to scratch under the drizar's jaw, the beast crooning happily. "There's nothing logical about Ash Avarian."
