by Zoey Parker
Jewel opened her mouth, but before she could say anything, Bard and Nic came back in with their arms full of sleeping bags and pillows. They dropped them in the middle of the floor in a heap.
“Okay, everyone grab some bedding, choose a room, and try to get some shut-eye,” Bard said. “We've got a long day tomorrow, and probably a bloody one, at that.”
Bard chose a sleeping bag and went upstairs. Nic grabbed another and walked into the dining room, closing the tall double-doors behind him.
Boomer snatched up a sleeping bag and went to the stairs, pausing halfway up to give me a venomous look.
“Sweet dreams, hero,” he spat.
Chapter 32
Jewel
Once the Reapers had gone to their separate rooms, Rafe and I placed a couple of sleeping bags together and sat on top of them.
The mood between us was strange. Before Bard and the others had gotten there, Rafe and I had been sleeping curled up with each other. It should have felt natural for us to return to that, but something still felt awkward and uncertain. From the way he was avoiding eye contact with me, I knew he was waiting for me to ask him what Boomer had meant when he said none of this was about me.
But I had another question for him first.
“When they got here and you thought they were Jester's people,” I began, “why did you tell me to run to the police? Before then, every time I brought up going to the cops about all this, you said it wasn't safe. You said they'd be in on it.”
“They might have been,” Rafe said.
“You, uh, sounded pretty sure about it before,” I pointed out. I was trying to keep my voice calm and even. Whatever was going on, it was clearly a sensitive subject based on his exchange with Boomer, and I didn't want to make him angry or upset. Still, I knew if there was any chance for us to go back to holding and kissing each other, it couldn't happen until he was finally honest with me.
Rafe sighed. “I didn't want you to go to the cops,” he admitted. “There really was a chance that they'd have been involved in this, but it was kind of a slim chance, and I played that up so you wouldn't run off. Which was very shitty of me, and I'm sorry.”
I wasn't too surprised by his answer. I'd been thinking about it a lot since he'd told me to run earlier, and this was the most logical explanation I'd come up with. I knew I should have been angry, but I wasn't. I was curious, though. “But why? Why would you need me around?”
“I needed to know what you knew,” Rafe said. “I had to find out if anything you'd seen or heard in that alley could help me bring down Jester.”
“So you were already going after Jester when you grabbed me from the alley?” I asked.
“It was why I was there in the first place,” he said. “I knew Angelo hung out there, and I hoped he'd be able to lead me to Jester. But when I saw what was happening with you, I just yanked you out of there and improvised from there.”
I was replaying all of the things Rafe had said to me before in my head, trying to put them all together so they'd make sense. “You told me you just got out of prison after seven years,” I said, “and that you were innocent. So I'm guessing Jester's the reason you were sent there. Am I right?”
“Yeah,” Rafe said, nodding. “He framed me. Drugs.”
“Why?” I asked. “Had you done something to him?”
“Dated his niece,” Rafe replied. “She turned out to be kind of a nut job, and when I tried to break it off with her, she told Jester that I'd beaten her up and raped her.”
I sat in silence for a moment, thinking everything over.
Rafe chuckled bitterly. “Thanks for not asking whether I actually did that stuff or not.”
I looked at him, surprised. “Of course not,” I said. “I know you'd never do that.”
“I'm surprised you think you know me at all,” Rafe answered. “I'm surprised you aren't already out the door and running to find the nearest state trooper barracks after finding out how much I've lied to you.”
“But I know why you did,” I said, putting my hand on his shoulder. “He stole seven years of your life. You said while you were at Potawatomi, you'd been attacked four times. His people, right?”
Rafe nodded.
“So of course you'd go after him,” I continued. “Of course you'd do whatever it took. You probably couldn't live with yourself if you didn't, even if that meant going against the other Reapers. I understand.”
“How are you not fucking furious with me right now?” Rafe asked. “I mean, Jesus, you owe me a beating even more than Bard does. All that time you could have just gone to the cops and gone back to your life, and instead I was dragging you from one disaster to the next...”
“But you protected me, too,” I pointed out. “And the past few days haven't been all gunshots and explosions. There are some parts that I wouldn't have traded for anything.”
“Really?” Rafe replied.
“Really,” I answered. “So what happens now?”
“Now we get some sleep, like Bard said,” Rafe began. “Tomorrow we head back to Chicago and stash you and the memory stick at the Devil's Nest.”
“What's the...?”
“It's the Reapers' clubhouse,” Rafe said. “A bar up in Rogers Park. The other guys in the club can guard you and the stick while I head over to Belmont Harbor and see if I can figure out which yacht belongs to the Thorns. I tell them we've got the list of their members, and that unless they let me and Jester settle things on our own once and for all, the list will get leaked to the Chicago crime families and they'll all become fertilizer in a hurry.”
“That sounds like a big risk,” I said.
“It's one I'm willing to take,” he answered. “Worst-case scenario, they kill me and this ends anyway. I'm not scared of that. At least you'll be safe.”
“But what if you didn't have to?” I asked. “Rafe, what if there were a way for you to just walk away from all this? What if you had something to live for instead?”
“Like what?” he answered.
“I'll tell you,” I said. “But there's one last question I need you to answer, and I need you to be honest with me.”
“Of course,” Rafe said. “Anything. I promise.” I could see how much he meant it, how badly he wanted to come clean with me about everything despite how hard it was for him.
“Once I'd told you what I'd seen and heard in the alley and you figured out how it could help you, why did you keep me around after that?”
I wanted him to say a hundred different things. That he hadn't wanted to trust my safety to the cops, even if they were honest. That he'd needed to protect me himself, just to be sure. That he'd felt better having me with him. That he'd wanted me so much he couldn't help himself.
He didn't say any of those things, but as he looked at me, his eyes said them all.
I don't know which of us leaned in first. It didn't matter. In one moment, we seemed to combine like two drops of water, our bodies and mouths pressed together in the dark, sinking to the floor.
Rafe laid his palm flat on my chest. He pulled away from the kiss, his eyes meeting mine. They seemed to burn right through me. “I want you on your back,” he said, slowly pushing me further down until my shoulder blades were pressed against the hardwood floor.
I looked deep into his eyes the entire way down, feeling the crotch of my panties grow damp at the look of calm control in his eyes. I had barely been able to stop thinking of the previous night and how fully he'd possessed me. I wanted it again.
And again. And again.
I reached up to touch Rafe's face. He grabbed my wrists, forcing them over my head and pressing them against the floor. I thought of the moment when he'd grabbed my wrists in the car—the intensity that seemed to run through his entire body like lightning as he told me how he was going to take Jester down.
I saw the same passion in him now, felt it sparking and burning off of him until it seemed like it would torch us both to cinders.
“You don't get to move
,” Rafe growled, his face inches from mine. I nodded and he slowly released my wrists, pulling my t-shirt over my head and tossing it aside. Then he cupped one of my breasts with one hand while kissing the other, his tongue spiraling around my nipple. I tried to stifle a moan so the Reapers upstairs wouldn't hear me, but I was only partially successful.
Rafe's mouth moved lower and he pulled down my leggings and panties in a single smooth motion, dropping them over his shoulder. A moment later his lips were pressed against my pussy as he tongue-kissed it slowly, pausing to flick the tip of his tongue against my clit.
It felt like someone had lit a fire in the pit of my stomach, and the warmth was spreading through my entire body. I arched my neck, closing my eyes to savor the glow. My wrists reflexively lifted off the floor as my fingertips quested down to stroke his hair.
Rafe suddenly lunged forward like a wolf pouncing on its prey. With his good arm, he seized my wrists again so hard they hurt, savagely driving them back to the floor over my head. His breath was loud and ragged, and I could smell my own scent on his glistening lips as his eyes locked on mine again.
“I said you don't get to move,” Rafe snarled quietly, carefully enunciating every word. “If you move, I'll stop. Do you want me to stop?”
“No,” I gasped, my chest heaving.
“Are you sure?” Rafe asked. I could feel his hard cock pressing against my leg insistently, even through his pants.
“Yes, I'm sure,” I breathed. “Please, Rafe...”
“Will you be a good girl for me?” Rafe teased.
My inner thighs were quivering. “Yes, I'll be your good girl, I promise...I'll do anything you say...just please don't stop, please, I need it so bad...”
Rafe held my wrists for another long moment, then released them and lowered his body again. His tongue plunged inside my pussy, moving up and down as his thumb gently massaged my clit. My entire lower body felt like it was vibrating.
Just before I could climax, Rafe sat up and undid his pants. His eyes were on me, daring me to move against his will. I kept my wrists crossed over my head as I spread my legs wide, offering myself to him completely.
“Good girl,” Rafe said again, nodding. He pulled his pants and underwear off, revealing his powerful erection for a brief moment before it disappeared between my legs. He positioned himself on top of me, one hand bracing him up, the other squeezing the nape of my neck. His face was close to mine again and I wanted to bring my lips forward to kiss his.
But he hadn't told me to, and I couldn't risk it. I'd never needed someone so desperately.
Rafe nodded again as though sensing my thoughts, then entered me suddenly. The force of him was like a hurricane hitting a coastline as he crashed against me, wild and unstoppable. He kissed me then, and I could feel his hunger for me burning under his skin. I clamped down on my own wrists to keep from holding onto him as our cries of lust were swallowed in each other's mouths.
“Oh yes, Jewel,” Rafe breathed against my lips. “God, yes, you're mine, baby, you're fucking mine...say it...”
“I'm yours,” I hissed, feeling the storm inside me grow and swell into something beyond all control. “I'm yours, Rafe, oh God, I'm yours...”
“Good,” he said, his hips bucking harder against mine. “Now you can touch me.”
My hands jumped forward uncontrollably, touching him, stroking him, exploring every inch of his naked body. I felt him fill me, and I climaxed a moment later, drenching us both as our bodies writhed together.
As we settled back onto the sleeping bags, I realized that I'd never been so happy in my entire life. I rolled over to search Rafe's eyes, to see if I could determine whether he felt the same way.
But Rafe's eyes were already closed, and a moment later, I heard him snoring gently.
Chapter 33
Jewel
The next morning, we woke to Boomer's voice saying, “Come on, kids, time to get movin'. Nic an' Bard already loaded the rest of the sleeping bags into the car.”
I was still naked from the previous night, and I quickly pulled the sleeping bag up to cover myself. “Can we get a couple of minutes' privacy first?” I asked.
Boomer rolled his eyes and walked into the kitchen. “Sure, as long as you don't try to sneak another fuck in,” he called back over his shoulder. “We ain't got that kind of time.”
As we pulled our clothes back on, I said, “So, when we were talking last night...”
“Listen, I know what you're going to say, okay?” Rafe said, rolling up the sleeping bags. “But it's not something I can hear right now.”
“What do you mean?” I asked.
Rafe sighed and walked over to me, putting his hands on my shoulders. I could see that moving his wounded arm was still difficult for him. “Last night, you were about to offer me a way out of this. You were going to say we could just walk away from it and be together, since this thing between us seems to be so strong. But I can't. Not after all this.”
“But why?” I pleaded. “For God's sake, you've got a concussion and a hole through one arm, and you're going up against an army. This is suicide, Rafe! Why would you choose this instead of us?”
“If this were just about me, I would,” Rafe answered. “A couple of days ago, I was so full of rage that if the devil himself climbed up out of hell and told me to walk away from this thing with Jester, I'd have told him to go fuck himself. Now, because of what I've found with you, I'd walk away in a fucking heartbeat. But then what?
“I leave the rest of the Reapers to clean up the mess I've made? They were the only family I had for years, and they did everything they could for me. Bard's right—I let them all down big-time. I need to make that right, even if it's the last thing I do. Otherwise, I'd have to spend the rest of my life knowing in my guts that I'm nothing but a selfish, cowardly piece of shit.”
I opened my mouth to answer him, but he put a hand up to stop me. “I'm not finished. This is about you, too. Maybe running off with me seems fun and romantic right now, but then what? You've got a job, parents, a whole life you need to get back to. Maybe there'll be room for me in it, and maybe there won't. But for us to even find out, I need to square this so Chicago will be safe for you again. If I don't, you'll be jumping at shadows from now on, waiting for all this to catch up with you. That's no way for you to live.”
“But I'm not sure that being without you is any way for me to live either,” I said in a small voice. I hadn't realized I felt that way until that moment, but I did.
Rafe forced a smile. “Hey, who says I'm going anywhere, huh? I have every intention of coming back to you alive and in one piece. I just need to finish this first.”
“But what about the memory stick?” I asked. “Nic said if the other crime families found out about it, they'd kill everyone whose name is on the list. Couldn't you just turn it over to them and let them handle it?”
Rafe shook his head. “Too uncertain,” he said. “The stakes are too high for us to trust in what the rest of these mob goons might or might not do. I need to see this through myself to make sure it's really over and we're both safe.”
Before I could say anything else, Bard peered in from the kitchen. “I hate to interrupt what I'm sure is a thoroughly scintillating conversation,” he said, “but we need to go.”
Rafe nodded, slinging the sleeping bags over his shoulder and heading out to the car. I followed him, wondering if there was anything else I could have said to make him change his mind and knowing that there probably wasn't.
He was right when he said I'd have been frightened to return to my old life, knowing that there were still dangerous people who wanted me dead for what I'd seen. But after everything I'd been through, I felt like fear was something I could have dealt with more easily than I had before.
I didn't think I could deal with losing Rafe, though. I was worried that would shatter me into a million pieces.
Bard drove us back to Chicago, with Boomer riding shotgun and Nic crammed into the back with
me and Rafe. I wanted to reach over to touch Rafe, or lay my head on his bare shoulder, but it didn't feel right with so many people sitting around us.
The radio was tuned to the same '50s music station Ham had been playing in the diner, and The Kingston Trio were singing for Tom Dooley to hang down his head because he was bound to die.
As long as Tom Dooley's the only one who is, I thought grimly.
During the drive, Boomer made a few phone calls to Reapers, letting them know what had happened and telling them to meet at the Devil's Nest to protect me until this was over.
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