“You’re bleeding,” he growled. “I’m going to kill that motherfucker.”
“Oh.” Her hand flew to her face, staring at the blood she’d wiped away with her fingers. “It’s nothing. My nose bleeds easily, even from a light tap.”
She sat up and scrambled forward, causing the blood to drip off her chin, splashing her bare breasts. That’s when the fear subsided and Adam’s anger hit a whole new level. That fucker had hurt her, he’d punched her. Had seen her. “I am going to kill him,” he said again.
“Can you do that after you pass me the blanket?”
He’d dropped everything in his arms the moment he’d broke into the clearing, so helping her to her feet, he led her back to the tree line. Once he had her settled back down, he got busy cleaning her up. It helped to keep his mind busy, to contain the murderous rage pounding through him. Pouring some water from one of their bottles on the corner of the blanket, he started to wipe her skin clean. His hand was shaking, he realized, jaw locked so damn tight it ached.
“He must have been following us,” she said, eyes wide, watching what he was doing.
“Yep.” He couldn’t believe he hadn’t noticed. But then that wasn’t a surprise since he’d had Lucy sitting beside him.
“Adam, I’m fine,” she said, touching his arm.
“Fine,” he repeated, but he couldn’t contain the anger and fear inside him any longer, and totally lost it. His head snapped up. “What in the fuck did you think you were doing?”
She clamped her mouth shut, sucking in a sharp breath through her nose.
“You could have been really hurt.” A growl tore from his throat. “You were hurt!”
“Adam, really. I’m fine,” she said again.
He held up the edge of the blanket, now soaked in her blood. “You’re not fine!”
“Stop yelling!” she yelled back.
“What if he dragged you in with him? What if he decided to finish what you started in that bar?” He stood, shoving a hand through his hair. “Do you even know you’re doing it? Are you even aware of the reckless shit you do?”
“Now, hang on—”
“No wonder Hugh’s so damn pissed with you. Jesus.” He locked eyes with her. “You don’t fucking think, Lucy.”
She grabbed her tank and tugged it on. “I was trying to help.” She got to her feet, still holding the other end of the blanket to her nose.
“By getting yourself hurt. By nearly getting yourself kidnapped!”
“He wasn’t trying to kidnap me!”
“You little fool.” He grabbed her arms. His fear over what could have happened was totally in the driver’s seat now, and had complete control over what came out of his mouth. “You think you know, but you don’t. You don’t know goddamn anything.” She had no idea, no fucking idea how he felt about her, how seeing someone punch her, make her bleed, had affected him. He felt like he was losing his mind.
“You’re an asshole.”
“I know,” he fired back. “Doesn’t change the fact that you nearly got yourself seriously hurt…that it could have ended up a hell of a lot worse. That you don’t think before you act.”
She was standing stiff, but at his words, yanked her arms free of his hold and took several steps back—away from him. “That’s not true.”
“Were you thinking when you started fucking your professor? A married man? Were you thinking then, baby girl?”
Her body jerked back like he’d punched her this time.
“Don’t call me that,” she whispered.
“Name fits.” He was breathing heavily, heart racing, head spinning. He knew he was fucking up more with every frightened, jealous word that came out of his mouth, but he was so past rational thought he didn’t know how to stop it. “Time to grow the hell up.”
She was shaking now. “Says the man with the revolving bedroom door.”
Now it was his turn to flinch.
“I thought we were going to have some fun together.” She shook her head. “I’m not having fun anymore.”
“Lucy…” He didn’t know what to say. He’d messed everything up, had hurt her. God, he could see it in her eyes. “I…I…” What? What could he possibly say to make up for the shit he’d just flung at her? I’m sorry sure as hell wouldn’t cut it.
She turned her back on him and pulled on her shorts and shoes. Without a backward glance, she headed toward the road.
“Where are you going?”
“We need to get to the next town, right?” She walked over to the piece of shit car their thief must have used to follow them and climbed in.
Shit.
Chapter Fifteen
As soon as they hit the next town Adam pulled over. He was probably just as anxious to get out of the confined space with her as she was. She took in the street they were on and had no idea where she was. All she knew was she needed to get as far away from Adam as she could manage, and started off down the road.
“Lucy!”
She ignored him and kept walking. What a mess. He was right—her brothers were right. She didn’t think. Took stupid risks. This whole thing—coming with Adam, forcing him to take her with him—was right up there. And right now, with everything else weighing her down, she couldn’t deal with it. It was too damn much.
By the lake, what they’d done. To her, it had been life altering, earth shattering. Nothing had changed for Adam, whether he felt it as well or not, and she knew that. Had always known it. God, she was stupid to think she could do this with him and have it not affect her. He’d told her what this was, and up until then she’d agreed with him. Yes, she loved him, but she knew he would never give her more, and she’d made her peace with that.
She’d stupidly allowed herself to hope that things could change between them, until he started acting weird straight after they’d had sex, like she’d wounded him somehow. It didn’t make sense, and she was done trying to figure him out.
Were you thinking when you started fucking your professor? A married man? Were you thinking then, baby girl?
A shudder moved through her.
That hurt. She hated herself for what she did. Knowing everyone else felt the same way…
“Lucy, goddamn, wait.” He grabbed her arm, pulling her to a stop.
“We don’t have time for this. You need to talk to the police and I’ll”—she spotted a hotel across the road—“I’ll go book us a room for the night.”
He seemed to relax a little, but his expression remained skeptical. “Okay. That’s…that’s a good idea.” He shoved his fingers through his hair. “I thought you were going to run off on me.”
She ignored the guilt swirling in her belly. She had nothing to feel guilty for. “The longer we stand here, the farther away your cousin’s car gets.”
His jaw jumped, like he was clenching his teeth.
“Don’t,” she said, stopping him before he could start on her again.
He cursed under his breath, but then lifted his hand toward her like he was going to touch her face. She pulled back before she knew she was going to do it.
“Luce…”
“I’ll see you in a bit, all right?” She turned and walked away before he could say another word, before he said something to change her mind. She’d made her decision. She wanted off this roller coaster ride. No way could she spend another night with him, acting like it meant nothing. That it was only about getting each other off. Friends with benefits. Screw that. Walking across the road to the hotel, she headed to the office and booked him a room. He’d be stuck there overnight for sure. Plus, he was probably watching her to make sure she did what she said.
“Where’s the bus station?” she asked the guy at reception when he handed her the key.
“Two blocks that way.” He pointed out the window.
“Thanks.” She quickly found Adam’s room. She had to at least leave him a note or he’d freak out and think she’d been kidnapped or something. It was cowardly of her, but she wasn’t brave enough to
wait and talk to him. What was there to say? This whole thing had been one huge mistake.
Grabbing the pad and pen she’d found in the bedside drawer, she quickly penned a note, then got out of there before he showed up and she lost her nerve. This time she was ending things on her terms. For once she’d be in the driver’s seat. Her life had felt out of control for months. She didn’t want that anymore. She thought she wanted the old Lucy back, the one before her relationship with Daniel. She’d been wrong. That girl was gone, permanently, altered in a way that she would never be coming back. If she’d gotten anything from her time with Adam it was that.
The bus stop was easy enough to find, but the next headed to LA was an hour away. Thankfully, her wallet had been in her pocket at the lake, so she had money to buy a ticket. But her clothes and her phone were gone. In a weird way, it was kind of freeing. For the first time in months, she didn’t have to worry about never-ending texts, who they’d be from, what awful things would be there when she looked.
Taking a seat as far from the entrance as possible, she settled in to wait. Please let her be long gone before Adam discovered her note.
Time moved at a snail’s pace, or at least it seemed to, but finally her bus was called over the loudspeaker. The tension left her shoulders the minute she boarded and took her seat. She just wanted to go home and forget all about the last two days.
Forget the way Adam’s lips felt on hers, the way his whole body had trembled when he’d kissed her for the first time. The way his hands felt on her skin, his tall, solid body covering her, moving inside her.
She shivered. Don’t think about it.
That was going to be easier said than done. But whatever pain she was feeling was her own fault. She knew better. Had acted without thinking, just like Adam said. And now she’d pay for it. Her heart would pay for it.
The last passenger climbed on and the door shut with a whoosh.
She slumped in her seat. Everything was going to be okay. She’d find a job. Move out of the apartment above the garage and get on with her life.
Bang bang bang.
Lucy startled, jumping in her seat, and spun to look out the window. Oh shit. Adam was standing there, eyes blazing.
“Get off the damn bus,” he said.
The bus started up.
Shit. She shook her head. People around her were watching. She could hear them shuffling in their seats, feel their eyes burning into her.
He slapped his hand against the glass. “Goddamn it, Lucy.”
He’d growled her name. Even muffled through the glass she could hear the rough edge to his voice.
“Don’t do this.”
The bus started moving, edging away, and, God, she couldn’t take her eyes off him.
“Lucy, please.” His gaze intensified. There was so much there, so much meaning and emotion. “Don’t go.”
A sob started to crawl up her throat. She almost stood and asked the driver to stop when he yelled those words at her. He sounded different…in pain. And she’d know. She was an expert on what pain sounded like. She’d been hearing it in her own voice for longer than she cared to think about.
Her eyes started to sting as she shook her head again, mouthing, “I can’t.”
He started walking with the bus, then jogging. The bus picked up speed and he pounded against the side one last time before they drove off. She twisted in her seat—couldn’t help herself. He stood there, one hand shoved in his hair, the other on his hip. And the expression on his face…
She spun away, sinking into the seat and slammed her eyes closed, unable to look at the haunted way he stared after her.
It meant nothing. It couldn’t.
None of this, the last few days, meant a damn thing.
~ * ~
Adam shot up in bed, breathing ragged. Fuck. He glanced at the clock.
Awesome. He’d managed a whole thirty minutes. He’d been lying there for hours, staring at the hotel ceiling, counting goddamn cracks, and wishing Lucy was lying beside him. Last night, with her by his side, he’d slept like the dead. For once his mind had been blank. No images of his mother, the way he’d found her, no guilt and pain and fear strangling him until he woke shaking and sick to his stomach. Lucy had given him the kind of peace he’d been chasing ever since that awful day. She was also so much more than that.
Fuck.
God, he was pathetic. What kind of man couldn’t sleep alone? But that’s what fear did, he guessed, and his was buried so deep in his subconscious there was no escaping it.
Running a trembling hand over his face, he let out a shaky breath.
He missed her. He missed Lucy.
Leaning against the headboard, he picked up the note he’d been trying to ignore for the last few hours. He’d read it once and put it aside. Reading it made his fucking chest hurt, his gut ache, like he was coming down with the flu. He stared down at it. Her writing was curved and round, a big loop on her Y. If he’d ever thought about it, that’s exactly how he would have imagined her handwriting would look. Could handwriting be friendly? Hers was. It was open and free, fun. His own was like chicken scratch. Tight, sharp angled.
He studied the note, each damn word, every swirl and curl. She’d written it hastily. The first part was just words, giving him the information she knew he’d need so he wouldn’t worry—that she was going home.
But the last sentence, it was darker. She’d pressed harder on the pen, emphasizing each word.
This was a mistake.
They struck like one hundred tiny razor-sharp arrows to the heart. Was she trying to convince him or herself when she wrote those words? Had the last couple of days been a mistake? Yes, but only in that now he knew what it was to be with her, to have a part of her he never thought he’d get a taste of. How would he carry on after this, like nothing happened? Like she didn’t mean everything to him?
He clutched the note tight in his fist, and shoved back the covers. His guilt and grief had sent him on a path that he wasn’t proud of. He’d become a thief, had done whatever the fuck he liked, had slept around. He hadn’t cared what happened to him. He’d only wanted to forget. A knock on the door pulled him from his thoughts.
He quickly pulled on his jeans. And, shit, even after the running list of the reasons he should stay away from her, he still hoped it was Lucy, and that she’d come back to him. Idiot.
But it wasn’t. It was the officer he’d spoken to about his cousin’s car. The irony of going to the police for a stolen car wasn’t lost on him. For once he was on the other end of the stick. He’d always been the thief; this time he was the victim. It didn’t feel great.
“We’ve found the car,” the guy said.
Thank fuck. “Where was it?”
“The idiot left it parked outside a bar in the next town while he was inside getting wasted.”
Sounded like their thief all right. “I’ll just get dressed.”
At least one thing was going right. He’d get the car delivered on time, his cousin would be happy, and he could go home.
Though, going home didn’t sound that great anymore.
Somehow he’d have to look Hugh and Joe in the eye and not feel like the lowest piece of shit on the planet.
And somehow he’d have to watch Lucy get on with her life without him.
Chapter Sixteen
Adam stood staring at Lucy’s apartment door. No one had arrived at the garage for work yet, which was how he’d planned it. He’d gotten back the day before, and though he’d wanted to come to her immediately and apologize for the way he’d acted—God, shake her for leaving him like that, for depriving him of their last night together—he’d gone to his own place and forced himself to stay away. He shouldn’t be there now, but he couldn’t bear another hour to pass and not tell her how sorry he was for behaving like a jackass.
Before he lost his nerve, he knocked—and waited.
Nothing.
He tried again.
“You looking for Luce?” J
oe asked behind him, scaring the shit out of him.
He turned around and fought not to wince when he stared his friend in the eye. It wasn’t easy. “Ah…yeah. I promised her I’d ask a guy I know about a job for her.” The lie slid past his lips, making him feel like an even bigger asshole.
“Yeah? Any luck?”
Adam shook his head, throat suddenly too damn tight.
Joe shrugged. “She got a job in a bar, so at least she’s got money coming in.” He rubbed the back of his head. “Wish she’d stop this stubborn bullshit and go back to school.”
She got a job? He wanted to ask where, but bit his tongue.
Adam came down the stairs. Lucy either wasn’t home, or had seen it was him and refused to answer. He didn’t blame her if it was the latter. “You and Hugh need to back off, seriously. You ever think she has a good reason for leaving? She was close to finishing, then she just leaves? Instead of giving her shit, maybe you two boneheads should’ve tried actually talking to her instead of at her.” He should keep his mouth shut, but he was worried about her, and the words were out before he could stop them.
Joe’s eyes went wide. “Now hang on—”
“Besides, she’s old enough to make her own damn decisions, whether you and your thick-headed brother like it or not.” Why am I still talking?
“Who’s thick headed?” Hugh rumbled from behind him.
“You are,” Joe and Adam said at the same time.
Hugh crossed his arms over his monster chest. “What did I do?”
Joe scowled at Adam then glanced at his brother. “He thinks we’ve been too hard on Lucy.”
“Yeah?” Hugh growled. “How many sisters do you have again, Grady? Oh, that’s right. None.”
“What if there’s something really wrong? There’s more to why she left school, I’m sure of it.” One thought had been plaguing him since she got back. “What about that guy she was seeing?” Surely her brothers had been wondering the same thing.
Slide (Boosted Hearts Book 3) Page 15
