She cried uncontrollably and buried her face in his chest while he held her tighter than he’d ever held any woman in his life. They sat that way for a long time, while he stroked her back and her hair and said nonsensical things like he was soothing a child.
“Pop?” Johnny whispered behind Seth.
“Johnny. Go get Madge, and tell Jarod and Anne to stay in the wagon.”
Without a word Johnny scurried out the door and disappeared.
Chapter Twelve
Her tears finally subsided, but he continued to hold her in his arms like he’d never let her go. God, how could I have been so stupid! I left her here alone in this town I know can be very dangerous. She's a woman alone, a very beautiful woman and a very desirable one, yet I expected her to be able to defend herself against someone who obviously wanted something from her. Where the hell is the deputy?
A few moments later he heard Madge come through what was left of the door in the front, and he yelled, “Back here, Madge.”
Madge entered the bedroom and moved to where he and Lily still sat, locked together like two puzzle pieces. “Seth? Oh my! What happened here? My goodness. Lily, are you all right?”
“I’m not sure what happened yet, but I’m damned sure going to find out,” he growled and ran his hand through his hair. “What I need you to do is go by the school and dismiss all the children for the day, hell, make it two. If the parents have a problem, tell them to come by and see me. Also, can you have my children just play in the yard until we get things settled down in here?”
“Of course, Seth. I’ll be right back.” Madge disappeared back out the door to do his bidding while he continued to cradle Lily in his arms.
Madge returned a short time later, but he still sat in the same spot with Lily. “Let me. I’ll help her get washed up.” Madge tried to pry Lily’s hands from Seth’s shirt, but the frightened woman wasn’t about to let go. “Lily, dear. Let go, and I’ll help you get cleaned up,” Madge said in her ear, trying to reach where Lily’s mind had now retreated.
“I’ll do it.” Seth told Madge then softly whispered to Lily, “Sweetheart, come with me. You need to get dressed.”
“Seth, you know it’s not proper. You two aren’t married.”
“At this point, I don’t care what's proper.”
He managed to get Lily to let go of his shirtfront, and then he put his arm around her shoulders before they walked into the kitchen. Forcing her to sit on one of the chairs, he moved around the kitchen and put some water on the stove to heat. “Madge, can you grab her something to put on?”
“Of course.” Madge headed back into the bedroom to look through the armoire for a dress.
Once she'd returned, he said, “Thanks, Madge.” He poured the now warm water into a bowl, took a washcloth from the stack of clean linens sitting on the table and lathered it up with some soap he found nearby.
The scent of lavender surrounded him. It was the same smell he'd now come to associate with Lily.
“Sweetheart, here, I’m going to wash your face and arms,” he said as he began to move the cloth over her cheeks, across her nose and down her neck. He took a deep breath, rinsed the soap off the cloth and then started rinsing the lingering film on Lily's skin while desire rushed along his nerve endings.
He managed to curtail his lingering lust when he thought about who could have come into her home so violently. She must have been so terrified; she'd taken out the gun he'd taught her how to shoot to protect herself.
Seth washed her arms and rinsed them clean. “Go ahead and get the dress ready to pull over her head while I work her nightgown loose.”
Lily raised trusting eyes to his as his hands stopped at the first button on her nightgown and began to unbutton it. He unbuttoned each one until it was loose enough to slip off her shoulders. The tops of her breasts peeked out when the material slipped down, and the lump in his throat grew bigger by the second. He slipped her arms out and held the nightgown to her chest. Madge slipped the dress over her head and down so he could loosen his grip and let it slip down to her waist. He got her to slip her arms into the dress, but he stifled a groan when his fingers brushed against her breast.
He cleared his throat, moved around behind her and buttoned up her dress. Her hairbrush lay nearby, so he picked it up and sat behind her. He slowly ran the brush through the tangles, smoothing it down her back. She had such beautiful hair. It hung in soft shiny curls down to her waist, and it curled around his hand like it had a mind of its own.
"Pack her a satchel with some clothing for a few days. I’m taking her out to my place.”
“But Seth…”
“I don’t care whether it’s proper or not, Madge. She can’t stay here, and I have Carmen at my place, so it’s fine. She can stay in the guest room, but I’m not leaving her here. Whoever was bold enough to do this just might come back to finish what he started.”
“You’re right, of course,” Madge replied, before she headed back into Lily’s bedroom to pack her some things.
“Sweetheart,” Seth said as he knelt in front of Lily. “I’m going to take you out to my place for a few days. You can’t stay here, all right?”
Lily nodded.
Seth mumbled, “I need to find you some shoes.”
* * * *
Lily cleared her throat and said, “By the front door.” Those were the first words she’d spoken since Seth had found her in that frightened state of mind.
“Ah yes… by the door,” he replied and walked toward the front door where he found her small boots.
When he returned, Lily had risen from the chair she had been perched on since he’d brought her from her bedroom.
Her voice cracked. “Thank you for what you’ve done for me. I… I don’t know what I would have done if you hadn’t found me this morning.”
“It’s what every good friend would do. Here. Let’s get these on your feet.” He guided her back down on the chair.
“Here are the things you asked for, Seth,” Madge said, returning with the satchel.
“Thank you, Madge.” He helped her stand and put his arm around her shoulder. “Now. Shall we go?”
She nodded, and they headed for the door.
Madge followed them out the broken door to the wagon. “Are you sure this is such a good idea, Seth? I mean, she could come to the boarding house with me.”
“I’ll be fine with Seth, Madge. It will only be for a few days. Please let the parents of the children know I’m fine, but I need a few days to recover from this. I’m sorry, but I need to be away from town right now. You understand, don’t you?”
Madge looked startled when Lily spoke.
“Yes… I… of course. You do what you feel is the best thing, my dear.”
The children came running around from the back of the house and hopped into the wagon while Seth helped Lily onto the seat and put her bag in the back.
“Madge, can you keep an eye on the house today? With the door broken, I don’t want anyone taking anything of Lily’s. I’m going to stop by the general store and have Jonathan bring some wood over to board it up.”
“Of course. I’ll stay here until Jonathan comes over.”
* * * *
Madge had been terrified when Johnny came running up to her door saying something had happened to Lily. When she had found her friends locked in an embrace on the floor of Lily’s bedroom, she was confused. Seth explained what had happened, and it saddened her to think her friend had to endure such an event. Madge really didn’t think it was a good idea for Seth to take Lily out to his place. Unfortunately, he wasn’t the type of man to argue with.
Shaking her head at the events of the day, she went back inside and tried to pick up around the house for Lily. She knew her friend was a very meticulous person and would want things just so when she came home. Working her way through the house, she finally reached Lily’s bedroom and began straightening her bed when she saw a folded piece of paper lying on the floor near the door. Ma
dge picked it up and opened it. It looked like a map of some sort. She could see several landmarks etched on the paper as she turned it one way and then the other. The borders of Seth’s ranch were traced on the paper with marks of what appeared to be X’s.
Well. This is odd to find in Lily’s bedroom. Maybe Seth dropped it when he was searching for her earlier. Madge shrugged and slipped it into her pocket. I’ll give it to one of them next time I see them.
A few moments later, she heard Jonathan knocking on what was left of the front door and calling her name.
“Jonathan. I see Seth found you. Come in.”
“Yes, ma’am. He wanted me to see if I could at least board up the front of the house and the broken window. What happened? Is Miss Lily hurt?”
“She’s not hurt, just shook up a mite,” Madge answered. “She’ll be fine, but we need to make sure no one comes around here while she’s away and messes with anything.”
“Of course. Does Seth know who did this? I mean, it’s kind of strange that someone would break into her house like this just to scare her.”
“I don’t think he knows, and I think you’re right: it is strange. I don’t believe we’ve ever had anyone’s house broken into in this town since I’ve been here. I do wonder, though, did Seth talk to the sheriff about it yet? He needs to be aware in case there are other homes broken into. You know, most folks around here don’t always lock their doors at night or when they’re gone. I’ll have to make sure Daniel keeps an eye out around my place, too. It wouldn’t do for my boarders to have their things taken. In fact, if you are set here for now, I’m going to walk over to my place for a bit. I’ll be back in a little while. I did tell Seth I’d keep an eye on the place.”
“I have everything with me to take care of the door and window, so you go on, Miss Madge. I’ll be here for a while doing the repairs anyway.” He walked outside with her to gather his tools. “Take your time, ma’am.”
“Thank you, Jonathan. Can I bring you some lunch or something when I come back? I imagine you might be hungry by then.”
“That would be nice, ma’am. Thanks.” Jonathan pulled some of the wood from the back of his wagon and headed back toward the house with a soft whistle.
“Of course. I’ll be back in a couple of hours then.”
* * * *
The wagon rolled into Seth’s ranch with the children and Lily as Carmen, wiping her hands on her apron, stepped out on the porch.
“What happened, Mr. Seth? Those children should be in school, and what is Miss Lily doing with you?”
“I’ll tell you in a bit, Carmen. For now, can you make up the guest room for Lily? She’ll be staying with us for a day or two.”
He hopped down from the wagon seat and went around to help her down as the children scattered, excited about having the next couple of days off from school.
“Yes, of course.” Carmen shot them a questioning raise of her eyebrow and then disappeared back into the house.
Seth helped her down from the wagon, but when he released her, she stepped back quickly, and he frowned. “Are you all right?”
“Yes.”
She’d clung to him at her house like she would never let go, and now she was pulling herself away from him, and he didn't really understand why. He'd been nothing but a concerned friend.
“I’ll grab your things from the back if you want to go on into the house.” He stepped around her, reached for her bag and then swung it over the side. “After you.”
She headed for the house, her gaze focused on the ground, ashamed of her behavior at the house earlier. She had clung to him like a frightened child. He had washed her like she was completely out of her mind, and he had even helped Madge dress her. It’s just not done. Why, we don’t even know each other that well, and there he was, dressing me, for gracious' sake. Now I am here staying at his home with him, without a chaperone except for Carmen and the children. Where has my mind gone? Gone completely crazy, that’s where. Thank goodness the children didn’t see the whole spectacle this morning. When she turned to look at Seth, finally, he didn’t seem to be the least put off with her there, or troubled by the events of the morning.
“I’ll take this into the guest room.”
Seth gave her a pensive look and then headed down the hall toward the back of the house with the bag Madge had packed.
Lily stood in the middle of the front room, not exactly sure what to do. Kathleen would be completely appalled at my behavior and the current situation.
When Seth returned, she still stood in the same spot, and he stopped directly in front of her. “Are you sure you are all right, Lily?”
“I’m fine,” she said, keeping her eyes downcast. She just couldn’t look him in the face.
He placed his fingers under her chin and forced her to meet his gaze. She wasn't prepared for the depth of pain reflected in his eyes. It wasn’t the same pain she’d seen before. This pain was for her and for what she went through the night before, and there was guilt, but she wasn’t sure why he should feel guilty.
“You aren’t fine, Lily.” His voice was laced with sadness. “I can tell by your eyes. You're scared, no, terrified, and you don’t have to hide it from me.”
Seth tried to get her to open up and face her fear. He stopped talking, gathered her to his chest and just stood there, holding her as she wrapped her arms around him and buried her face against his shoulder, trying hard not to cry.
After a moment she pulled away and said, “I’m sorry, Seth. Yes, I was scared, but that’s no excuse for my behavior afterward.”
“Your behavior?”
“Can we not talk about this now?” She walked away twisting a piece of her skirt in her hand. “I really don’t want to bring this up right now.”
“Bring up what? I don’t understand?”
Rolling her eyes, she wanted to make him understand her need for discretion. Finally, she turned around and said, “Seth, I’m really uncomfortable talking about this at the moment with the children and Carmen so near. Can we discuss this later?”
He ran his hands through his hair in what she had come to realize was a sign of frustration. He obviously didn’t understand what she was talking about when he said, “Fine. I’m going to the barn. I have work to do.”
Watching him leave, sorrow ripped through her. She hadn’t tried to tell him what was on her mind. She wanted to have this conversation in private, and with three children and a housekeeper nearby, it wouldn’t be very private. Maybe later I'll follow him to the barn, and we can talk once the children are in bed. She really wanted to thank him for all he’d done for her throughout the day and for letting her stay in his home, but something held her back. He felt guilty. She could see it in his eyes, but she needed to make sure he knew the attack on her wasn’t his fault. He already harbored enough regret for Victoria’s death. He didn’t need the guilt of her attack on his mind, too.
Choosing to stay in the house for now, she went off into the guest room to unpack her things as best she could for the short time she would be there.
It really was a beautiful home. There were just enough feminine touches, but not enough to be overwhelming. It was clear the home didn't have a mistress per se. Carmen probably lives here all the time, but she must not feel it's her place to give it a feminine touch.
The guest room was small, but it suited her just fine. It had a fair-sized bed with a pretty bedspread adorned with intricate patterns of flowers and birds that were done by needlepoint. Having done some of that with Kathleen, she knew how long this must have taken someone to do, and it was magnificent!
The bureau appeared to be very sturdy although clearly handmade. Running her hand over its top, she wondered if Seth had made it. A moment later, she noticed the rocker in the corner. Its hand-carved seat gleamed in the sunshine streaming through the lace curtains on the window. Lily stopped to smooth her hand over the shiny surface when she saw the small pillow gracing the back of the seat. She picked it up to examine it,
and her heart sank when she read the letters stitched into the fabric.
Seth and Victoria. Married May 21st, 1871.
The pillow was so pretty and each stitch exhibited so much love, she couldn’t continue to hold it. It hurt to see how much love the two of them had shared here in this house.
The rocker had to have been made by Seth for his beautiful Victoria to rock his newborn children in.
Lily suddenly felt completely inadequate when it came to womanly skills when she realized she had never been very handy with needlepoint. She had been too busy working with Edward on the numbers and just couldn't be concerned about needlepoint or sewing. Kathleen had tried to teach her, she really had, but Lily hadn’t been interested. Numbers fascinated her as well as the records Edward kept for his shipping business, so if given the choice, she would always choose to follow Edward to the shipyard. She could get by with cooking and mending, but when it came down to the finer aspects of womanly crafts, she felt she'd failed miserably. She would in no way be able to compete with the pretty things that surrounded her in this room, especially the things that screamed of a woman’s presence. This house held the presence of the one woman she hoped she would never have to compete with for Seth’s affection, Victoria Sanford.
Lily spent the rest of the day in the guest room while she tried to come to terms with her feelings for Seth. She knew she cared for him more than she should at this point, but she couldn’t stop the way her heart fluttered in her chest when her eyes met his. She couldn’t stop how she leaned into his kiss whenever his lips met hers and he traced her mouth with his tongue. When he’d actually invaded her mouth, the heat pooling between her legs had almost been her undoing.
He had also been her saving grace in this crazy town, even before she had arrived. Seth had been responsible for saving her on the train from the robbers, saving her from the townspeople who wanted to send her home, and saving her from the men who tried to attack her the night before. Now she was here, in his home. What was he doing? He was here to save her from herself so she could muster her courage to return and continue to live in her home by herself.
Love's Sweet Surrender Page 13
