Noah’s eyebrows climbed. “What? You’re the woman who insisted on staying alone in her house after a maniac spray-painted messages all over the outside!” His voice had climbed, too.
Get a grip.
“You’ve uplifted my morning enough, thank you. If you’re not here to discuss city business, can we end this conversation?”
“Yeah. We can do that.” Now he was gruff, his face impassive. “Don’t go out by yourself. That’s an order.”
“And here I’d planned a hike in the woods all by myself on my lunch hour.”
His last look at her smoldered.
Left alone, she sank into her chair. Oh, God, why was she antagonizing the man who came to her rescue every time she needed him?
Because that scares me.
When had she turned into this pathetic creature who stumbled from one domineering man to another?
Fortunately, her day didn’t require any field trips. She concentrated on educating herself, studying tax records for a better understanding of how particular neighborhoods compared, how mixed-use the new development had been. Scrutinizing the building permits that had been issued in the past year, she found herself acquiring new sympathy for Michael Kalitovic’s point of view. No house she would call even remotely affordable was being built. Supposedly, central Oregon was appealing to new retirees who could take advantage of the natural beauty and abundant recreational opportunities while living more affordably than they could in the Portland area, say. If so, they wouldn’t be buying in Angel Butte. Most of the developments were aimed at people with real money or were intended to be vacation homes—again, for the wealthy who might spend only a few weeks or months there a year, for the skiing or fishing. Cait imagined Angel Butte as a giant ghost town for much of the year, with hundreds of huge empty houses while the people who clerked at Walmart and Safeway, cleaned the rooms at the increasing number of resorts, waitressed at Chandler’s Brew Pub, all had to commute from...who knew, La Pine or farther.
Of course she was getting carried away and knew it. The already existing homes in the older parts of town tended to be modest. Heaven knew the three-bedroom, one-bath rambler she and Colin had grown up in was.
She had so far been very careful not to turn down that street even when she was in the neighborhood. She’d have to ask Colin if he ever drove by out of curiosity.
Cait grimaced. Okay, maybe not such a good idea. Raising the subject of those tumultuous years wouldn’t exactly help smooth their existing relationship.
She ordered lunch in, relieved when Noah didn’t appear, although she hadn’t really expected him to. He’d looked pretty mad when he’d left that morning. Besides, there had to already be talk about the two of them. He’d spent more time with her than was wise. Plus, once yesterday’s police reports became common knowledge, city hall workers might speculate as to why he had followed her out to Bond Road.
Come to think of it, she hadn’t thought to ask why he had.
Did it matter? He’d been there when she’d needed him. He had been exactly what she needed.
Yes, I am officially pathetic, she decided.
At four-thirty, she dutifully placed a call to Colin and learned her poor car had now been towed to an auto body shop. It would be ready as soon as tomorrow afternoon. Aside from the windows, the only damage had been to the wheel, bent after the tire blew. She and Colin agreed on a time for him to pick her up.
Cait was aware of a sickening wash of fear when she realized it didn’t really matter whether she had her car back or not. She wouldn’t dare drive unless Colin was right behind her in his SUV.
But sooner or later, they’d find Blake. How good could he be at hiding? He was a water systems engineer, for Pete’s sake, a regular guy, except for his weird obsession for her. Once he was arrested, she’d have her life back. She could declare her independence again.
But, remembering the terrifying moments of crawling behind her car, imagining the gunman walking down the hill toward her, knowing there was nowhere she could run to, Cait had a feeling real confidence was going to be slow returning.
* * *
NOAH TRIED NOT to look at Cait when he didn’t have to. He hated seeing the strain on her face, those lines of tension growing more visible as days passed.
Finding the goddamn bullets had turned out to be the proverbial hunt through the haystack. Cait remembered four being fired. One had ripped through her left rear tire. One went straight through her car, leaving those two ugly holes. A third dissolved the glass in the driver’s-side door. The fourth had either also gone through that window or missed entirely. Colin had people out combing the woods with, by day four, no success.
Blake Ralston had called the firm he worked for to extend his vacation. If he was staying at any hotel or resort in the surrounding three counties, it wasn’t under his own name. He hadn’t used a credit or debit card—but he hadn’t needed to, the detective heading the hunt for him had determined. He’d taken three thousand dollars out of a savings account the day before he’d begun his “vacation.”
During one of Noah’s brief encounters with Cait, he had asked where she was staying. Still in her brother’s guest room, she’d said. Colin hadn’t been comfortable with her moving alone into the garage apartment. He’d rather have her closer.
She was fine, she said, but it didn’t take any great insight to see that she wasn’t.
Noah kept his distance anyway. If he didn’t, he’d find himself somewhere he’d never intended to go. Cait McAllister, astonishingly strong, stubborn, scared, fragile and lonely all at the same time, was even more dangerous to him than he’d understood when he’d hired her. He already felt too much.
It would go away, he told himself when he saw her down the hall or across a conference room table. It had to.
He’d been getting a hell of a lot done on his house. Visiting his restaurants, harassing managers or poring over business financials after a day spent doing the same over city income and output didn’t work as an outlet for his raging physical restlessness. Steaming wallpaper off walls worked; stripping varnish from woodwork was better. Ripping out a wall was best of all. But none of it helped him sleep.
Noah was not amused to realize he was as obsessed with Cait as that son of a bitch Blake Ralston was. So what did that make him?
He knew her brother had escorted her to the one evening meeting she hadn’t been able to skip out of that week. She had set it a while ago, calling for public input on a projected rezoning of a slice of the annexed territory. If she’d asked, Noah would have gone with her instead. His presence wouldn’t have excited comment. But even knowing she had to attend, he hadn’t offered.
Friday night, he decided to walk over to Chandler’s and grab a bite before he went home. He shared the elevator down to the lobby with half a dozen other people, all of whom seemed to be in a good mood because they’d be off until Monday. Him? His gut was balled in a knot because for the next two days he wouldn’t catch even a glimpse of his director of community development.
Except he did. He stopped dead after exiting the elevator, because there she was by the glass doors, hovering just inside, looking out.
Waiting for her brother, he realized. Either she’d been ordered not to go outside until Colin pulled up or she was afraid.
Noah’s feet were moving before his brain caught up. He stopped right beside her. “Call your brother. Tell him I’m taking you out to dinner and I’ll bring you home later.”
She stared up at him with those beautiful eyes that seemed perpetually darkened these days.
“He should be here any minute.”
“Call him anyway.”
After a moment, she gave a small nod and drew her phone from her bag. She kept looking at him as she talked to her brother.
“Colin, I’m joining Noah for dinner. He says he’ll brin
g me home.” She listened for a minute, then said, “That really isn’t any of your business. I’ll see you later.”
“Let’s walk,” he said. “You must be feeling housebound.”
Her laugh was shaky but real. “That’s one way of putting it.”
He pushed open the door and laid a hand on her back as he escorted her out. God, she felt good. The muscles moving beneath his fingers were lithe and supple. He kept his hand there as he turned her to head east on the sidewalk.
“How’d the community input meeting go?” he asked easily.
Talking business relaxed her. It carried them for the two-block walk to Chandler’s.
Cait glanced at him when he opened the door for her. “Do you ever eat anywhere else?”
“Sometimes.” Rarely. Mostly when he was scoping out new places. “I can trust my own employees not to gossip about me.”
“That makes sense.”
“I cook for myself most of the time.”
A shapely brunette who must be a new hire showed them, at his nod, to a very private booth tucked in a corner rather than a window seat. She obviously knew who he was. Noah sat so he could see the restaurant, but no one walking in was likely to notice Cait. They ordered, steak and fries for him, spicy chicken wrap for her. He was a little surprised when she asked for a glass of wine.
They were there early enough, the restaurant hadn’t yet filled up. He was glad of the quiet. They’d be long gone by the time the band set up.
“Tell me how you really are.”
She gave a short laugh. “Oh, fabulous. Can’t you tell? I thrive on tension. Having a guard everywhere I go? One of the perks of surviving a murder attempt.”
“I’m serious.”
Her smile vanished. “You really want to know? It sucks. Everything sucks. I can’t do my job adequately. I can’t live in my own home. Nell’s mad at me. Colin’s mad at me. So we’re all excruciatingly polite, and I can’t even yell at them because it’s my fault they’re mad at me. I ruined my favorite suit, my car is starting to feel at home in auto body shops—wow, glad one of us can feel at home somewhere—oh, and I can’t sleep for staring at the window thinking how quickly someone could break it. I could be dead by the time Colin got his bedside drawer open.”
Jesus. Okay. He’d asked.
“Someone?” was what he said.
“Blake. Is that what you want me to say?”
He hoped she didn’t notice how he was clenching his teeth. “You sound like you’re hoping it’s someone else.”
“Why would I be hoping that?” Cait stared at him like he was crazy. “Oh, my God! Do you know how freaky it would be to have two different people after me?”
“Uh...yeah. I guess it would be,” he admitted. He hadn’t thought of it that way. “It seemed to me you might be determined to think Ralston couldn’t possibly want to hurt you.”
She was still staring, but he had absolutely no idea what she was thinking beyond feeling sure he wouldn’t like it. It had to be thirty seconds before she looked away. “Okay, you’ve got me,” she said. “I do believe Blake would hurt me if he gets mad enough. I’m scared of him, all right? But that’s not the same thing as him buying a gun and trying to kill me from a distance like that. It doesn’t feel right.”
It didn’t feel right to Noah, either. It was one of many things that had been eating at him.
But when he didn’t respond quickly enough, anger sparked in her eyes. “What is it? You think I’m still nursing fond feelings for him?”
Noah shrugged, watching her. “Happens.”
“Well, it’s not happening here.” She was still mad. “I feel nothing but this kind of horror that he can be totally fixated on making my life miserable. Or, God, ending it. And do you know the worst part? It’s trying to figure out how I could have been so blind.”
“Hey,” he objected. She’d said that before, and he hadn’t liked it then, either. He reached for her hand even though the waitress was bearing down on their table with salads. “This is not your fault. Don’t go there. How could you ever have anticipated this kind of crazy?”
She bent her head so their eyes weren’t meeting again. Because she didn’t buy what he was saying? Or because there was something she hadn’t said? His eyes narrowed, but he let go of her hand, nodded a brusque thanks to the waitress and reached for his napkin.
Cait did the same. “I’m sorry,” she said after a minute. “I must be wonderful company. You and Colin have been great, and I keep feeling resentful because I need you. That doesn’t say much about me.”
“I’d resent it if I needed anyone else, too,” he said. The words were barely out when he was hit by a staggering thought. I do need her. And part of that witch’s brew in his belly was resentment, because he didn’t want to need anyone. All week long, he’d battled against the magnetic force pulling him toward her so powerfully, sometimes he almost needed to grab a door frame and hold on to keep himself from being sucked down the hall to wherever she was. And, yeah, that made him angry. He tried to blame her. He kept telling himself he wasn’t obligated to her. Protecting her was her brother’s business, not his.
Except he did want to protect her. He wasn’t sure he could live with himself if he didn’t. And he wanted to make love with her more than he’d ever wanted anything in his life. And that infuriated him, too.
Obsessed.
Who could he blame but her?
She lifted her chin and looked at him with astonishment for what he’d said. “I didn’t think anyone would understand.”
His tongue felt thick. “I do. You came here to start a new life. Maybe to forge some kind of new relationship with your brother. But even that’s been screwed up, because your old life followed you.”
Her eyes kept searching his, her expression so open, radiating such pain, it was like she’d taken a meat cleaver to his chest. But what she said took him by surprise.
“Do you have sisters or brothers?”
Noah shook his head. “No siblings. I think after my mother remarried, they tried. Although I could be wrong.”
“It’s lonely, isn’t it?”
He opened his mouth to say, probably rudely, What do you know? but realized she did. She’d had a brother and lost him. At the same time as she’d lost her father.
Who most people would say was no loss, but most people would say that about Noah’s father, too. And they’d be right, but somehow that didn’t help.
“Yeah.” He had to clear his throat. “It was.” Is. Even if that’s the way he wanted it.
Cait nodded, as if they’d said everything important, and reached for her fork. “It was nice of you to ask me to dinner tonight. You’re right. I was going stir-crazy.”
In self-defense, he started to eat, too.
He asked about her dissertation, and he wasn’t surprised when she admitted she’d managed only a few weekend hours on it.
“Of course, there’s no real deadline, and a little break from it might actually be good,” she said. “I can see it with a more objective eye. I’m not letting myself worry about it until I’m more settled into the job.”
She didn’t say, And until I don’t have to worry about somebody trying to kill me.
Eventually he got her talking about her brother and this new sister-in-law, and he told her what he remembered about Nell Smith aka Maddie Dubeau’s reappearance in Angel Butte.
“It was the biggest news we’ve had since I moved to town,” he said wryly. “Got bigger, too, once there were a couple attempts on her life, and your brother’s investigation opened such a can of worms.”
“The drug trafficking.”
He shook his head. “We already knew that was a problem in the area. Our police department has been part of the joint task force for a long time. What we didn’t know was that we
had corruption in our own department.” He still had trouble believing it. “Our own goddamn police chief. And I always thought this town might as well be Mayberry.”
“Apple pie, Little League baseball, kids able to play after school with no one having to worry about pedophiles or drunk drivers, moms putting wholesome dinners on the table, dads walking in the door at five-thirty to kiss their wives and talk about their days?”
He looked at her ruefully. “You always knew better, didn’t you?”
“My life here was not that idyllic.” Her twisted smile made him ache. “The idyllic parts were all because of Colin. I guess I took him for granted.”
“You’re supposed to be able to take the people you love for granted.” He heard himself and was stunned. Did he believe that?
Maybe. What he couldn’t do was relate it to himself.
“I suppose so,” she said softly.
After that, conversation became easier. He did tell her a little bit about his mother and stepfather, the childhood that hadn’t been abusive and sounded okay from the outside, about his teenage ambition to make it to the NFL before a knee injury had put paid to it, him considering going to New York with an aim to be a Broadway star.
“A villain, of course,” she teased him.
“Naturally.” He smiled without regret at what had both been typically youthful dreams. “Went to the U of O and majored in business. I worked in a sporting goods store the last couple of years of high school, Boulder River Sports Company. Do you know it? Really smart guy started it. He’s only a few years older than I am. By the time I was a junior in college, I realized I wanted to be him.”
“Does he have political ambitions, too?” She took a big bite of her wrap.
Noah chuckled. “Wouldn’t surprise me. It’s damn tempting to try to reshape your environment to suit. He may get there. Although with stores all over the West now, he’d have to run for national office.”
Cait tilted her head. “You might have to run for state office.”
He was already shaking his head. “Don’t think so. The mayor gig was an alternative to opening a fourth restaurant. Next time, I’ll go with expanding.”
Harlequin Superromance January 2014 - Bundle 1 of 2: Everywhere She GoesA Promise for the BabyThat Summer at the Shore Page 13
