“The storm is keeping me awake,” she whispers while taking her first step onto the porch.
I stand to greet her, not knowing if it’s my body or mind making the decision to do so. “Me too.”
Her eyes are locked on mine, her hands grazing each of my arms as she inches even closer. I can feel her breath against my skin, her body pressing over the front of me. “Storms like this get me freaked out. I was hoping you’d be the distraction I need tonight, Buck. It’s just us right now. You and me. Just let it happen.” She brings one hand up and glides a few fingers over my lips. My eyelids shut as I take in the experience of feeling someone intimately touching me after a long bout of dormancy. It’s electrifying, much like the lightening illuminating the sky around us. She’s meticulous as she continues to trace them, parting them enough in order to lean in and coarse her puffy lips across. This precise moment sends my limbs into overdrive. My senses begin to awaken, and I’m forced to allow it to happen, because there’s no way I’m able to stop. Our first kiss is slow, mindful, but above all a hint of everything I’ve forgotten. She maps her way back down my arms, attaching her hold on either side of my waist. Her fingers tuck into the back of my belt, making sure I’m unable to easily pull away. Her mouth beckons me, the slip of her tongue teasing mine. My limp hands finally lift to come around her tiny midriff to rest right above her perfect ass. I tuck them down into the back pockets of her soft shorts and keep them there.
I move my head away for a breath, taking her in before crashing back into a more powerful kiss. My tongue finds hers, desperate and wanting. They mingle together, setting a dynamic pattern as they rub and play. With each stroke I’m withering away into a pool of desire; a place deep within that I thought would never see the light of day again. She’s breaking down my walls by the second, forcing me to be the man she needs, and the one I’ve refused to show anyone for years.
This is what I need. It’s what I want.
I pick her up, her legs wrapping around me as I carry her toward the railing. She sits there, still holding me with her bottom half, while her back presses against the screen walls. I won’t let her fall. My hold is too strong for that to happen, besides the fact that I’m enjoying myself entirely too much to have it ruined.
With full trust in me, Perry begins to unfasten my pants, quickly shoving her hand down into my boxers to get familiar with the hidden part of me. She moans against my lips when my hard predicament takes her hand by surprise. Her heels dig into the back of my jeans, shoving them down to expose me. I lift her t-shirt, pulling it over her head and tossing it on the wet deck. Her breasts are perky, the nipples standing at attention as the cold, wet rain trickles over her skin. Each time the lightening strikes, I capture my own personal photograph, etching it into my memory for a later time. It’s been forever since I’ve seen a live naked woman. I rake in the idea of my lips being places they shouldn’t. We kiss again, this one almost hungry, as if we’ve both been starved. I lose myself in this one, my knee pressing between her legs to imply my intentions. She grinds against me, and it’s that type of permission that leads the way for her bottoms to be torn from her legs. I want her naked, wet, and ready for my taking. She’s awakened the beast inside of me, and now that it’s happened, there’s no stopping me. I’m raging. I’m unhinged. It’s fantastic. I’m out of control.
While I absorb all that is occurring, Perry scoots from my hold and squats, finally falling to her knees. I try to back away to give her room, but she takes me by the ass and pulls me closer. Her eyes are fixated on mine as she licks my fully erect shaft. My legs are shaking, the nerves finally coming into play. This woman wants me. She wants every single part of me that’s been too broken to operate. She’s forcing me to want this, and as she takes me into her mouth I’m exasperated and unable to find a single reason this can’t happen.
It only takes a few strokes before I’m unable to hold out. I grab her by the hair and steadily pull her away to prevent something I don’t think she’ll appreciate. Her body comes up and her next kiss tells me she’s open to whatever comes next. Her hand secures my package, while she backs up into the railing where she was before. I know what she wants, and as I try to focus on anything but what we’re doing, I lift and let nature takes it course.
In my past I’ve never had a hard time getting turned on, but imagine holding out for years on end. This build up doesn’t allow for restraint. The second I slip inside I feel myself coming undone, and as I let out a moan sure enough to wake the household, I sit up in my bed and realize it was all a dream.
I’m still alone. The storm is rumbling the house, but everything else quiet and unmoving.
My heart races like it’s going to burst from my chest, my breathing is heavy and sporadic. Thoughts of the dream so vivid in my mind, making me curious yet ashamed.
My senses are heightened, and I feel as if everything I’ve experienced really happened. It takes me a few seconds to calm down and appreciate it was a dream, though I know in my heart this can only mean one thing.
I want Alice Perry, and now it’s up to me to figure out if I’m willing to give up my past to have a better future.
Chapter 8
Buck acts strange when I see him first thing in the morning. He offers me coffee, tells me I don’t have to lock up, and heads out without another word. Did I mention how he refused to make eye contact with me? It’s weird. I thought we’d made some progress last night, only to get the feeling he doesn’t want to be near me at all.
I get a kick out of watching Buck’s sons get up and go through their routines before work. They all greet me with a smile, probably because they think their father is dating again, but none of them ask any awkward questions, especially with their father in the same room.
When the house is quiet, and all the men have vacated the premises, I start tidying up. The house is a mess by my standards. It needs a makeover, each room at least a decade out of style.
Cabinets are missing in the kitchen. Drawers are broken. The refrigerator sounds like it’s running a mechanical marathon. The deck is like a splinter trap, while the carpet looks like a triathlon has taken place on it, maybe more than once. It’s a man cave, a bachelor pad even.
The floral print on the living room curtains were probably beautiful when Layla picked them out, but they’re dated and the sun has faded them in parts. The bathrooms are disgusting. I actually put toilet paper on the bowl before I sat down, because I was afraid of contracting something, and that says a lot since I work with the public and cater to drunks.
Nick gets ready for school without knowing I’m not letting him out of my sight, at least until I know Peter has left town and doesn’t plan on coming back. I offer Bristol a ride to school, but she insists she has other means of transportation.
Once Bristol heads out, I’m left to explain why my son can’t go anywhere. Buck isn’t going to like it, but hiding out at his place is my only completely safe option, especially since I know Nick wasn’t paying attention when we drove here.
I sit down on the couch next to my son and sigh before proceeding with the news he’ll resent me for. “We need to talk.”
His reaction is much like every kid his age. “About what?”
“Your father. There are things you don’t know, Nick. There’s things that make me want to pack up and never return home.”
“What? He wants to see me. He told me you’re trying to keep us apart, and I’m sick of it. I’m old enough to make my own decisions. If I want to live with Dad I can. Look it up. I have the right to choose.”
I’m already beginning to choke on words, because it’s painful to hear him being unsupportive. “It’s not that. He’s been in jail, Nick. He almost killed someone.”
“He made a mistake.”
Finally I can’t stand it any longer. If he’s old enough to make his own choices then it’s time he knew the awful truth. “He beat me, Nick.”
The room is silent. I fidget, while waiting for some kind of res
ponse. He closes his eyes and turns in another direction, like looking at me pains him. “I know. You think I don’t remember that night, but I do.”
“That night? You think it was once?”
“Wasn’t it?” Of course he’d only know about the one time. All the others I kept him sheltered and safe from the brutal truth.
“No, Nick. It’s wasn’t only one time. Your father beat me for years. He kept it from the neck down so other’s wouldn’t see.” By this time I’m finding it difficult to keep my strength up to explain the details. Looking at my beautiful son, the boy I made with a man I loved fully, and telling him that same man is a monster, well it’s impossibly terrifying. I’m breaking my son’s heart, and in doing so ensuring he knows why we had to run, and why we’ll continuing doing so if we have to. “I hid the truth, because he said if I told he’d hurt me.”
“He won’t hurt me,” he assumes.
“You’re wrong. I wish you weren’t. Your father threatened me. He said if I told anyone he’d put us both in the ground.”
Nick’s eyes widen. He stands and points in my direction. “You’re trying to turn me against him and I won’t stand for it. He’d never lay a finger on me. He’s taking me to New York with him, and there’s nothing you can do.” He grabs his book bag and begins to head toward the front door.
I chase after. “Wait. Please hold on. Where are you going now?”
“School. Then I don’t know.”
“Nick, please listen to me. I wouldn’t lie to you. I’m scared for you, for the both of us. That’s why we’re here. I needed to get us out of harm’s way.”
“You’re psycho. He told me you screwed around on him and that’s why he got into the fight with the police officer. You let him go to jail for trying to keep our family together, now you’ll say anything to try to turn me against him. It’s not going to work. I want to live with Dad.”
“No. I won’t allow it.”
“It’s not your decision,” he’s yelling. “You’re not in control, Mom. I’m almost eighteen. You can’t dictate my life anymore.”
“Don’t go. Please. I wouldn’t lie about this.”
He’s up in my face. “I’m leaving. You want Dad gone right? You wish he’d leave? Well I’m the solution. I’m going with him.”
“Nick, please,” I’m begging. “Don’t. He’s not the person you think he is.”
“Bye Mom. I’ll call you after school.”
“You don’t even know where we are.”
“This island is small. I’ll use my phone to GPS the route.”
“No!” I’m adamant. “You can’t. I’ll drive you.”
Determined to ensure the privacy of my location, I agree to take Nick to school, and while my heart is breaking into a million pieces, I contemplate what I have to do to get him to stay.
I pull up at school and place the car into the parked position. He turns to face me with those baby blues I love so much. I hate seeing his father in him, but there was a time when I found him the most handsome man I’d ever set eyes on. Nick resembles him. I can’t deny the similarities, although he still has a lot of growing to do. He’s suffering from acne breakouts, and complains he’s not interested in dating girls. He looks at porn. I’ve caught him several times using my laptop. Apparently he’s into blondes who enjoy giving oral. I try not to dwell on it and give him his space. “You can’t talk me out of this, Mom.”
“I don’t want you to go. You have to finish school. There are only a couple weeks left. Please don’t leave me, Nick.” I’m already sniffling, fighting the urge to break down in front of him.
“I’ve spent my whole life with you, Mom. I want to get to know my father. I’m almost an adult. This is my decision. Besides, I’ve passed all my classes, and Dad said he’d stick around so I could take my exams.”
“He’s not the man he says he is.”
“I’m done arguing about it. You won’t change my mind. I’m going. After school I’m packing my things and Dad’s picking me up. I’ll call you when we get settled. He says he’s got a new place.”
“No! I won’t allow it.”
“Dad says you don’t have full custody. He says he has every right to see me.”
Peter is telling the truth for once. I never filed papers because I assumed he’d be locked up until Nick was in his twenties. This can’t be happening. I never saw this coming.
“I’ll call you to check on you later tonight, Mom. It’s going to be okay.” It’s the last thing he says before he exits the vehicle, never looking back to say goodbye. He’s pissed, and as much as I can understand why, my heart won’t let me give up on him.
I’m parking in the visitor lot, my plan is to fill out paperwork preventing anyone to show up and check Nick out of school early, not that it would stop him from walking out, but at least it will give me the peace of mind. I feel like his principal needs to know a convicted felon could be lurking around the premises.
Before I can make it up the steps, I hear his deep raspy voice, the kind that’s smoked way too many cigarettes in prison.
“Alice, nice of you to finally arrive. Is Nick late like this every day? Is this how you parent?”
“Screw you. What are you doing here?”
He takes a step toward me, his hands coming out of his dark trousers. His shirt is a button up in a linen fabric. It looks new, which surprises me since I know he doesn’t have any money, or at least didn’t before he went to jail. “Did you think you could get rid of me with the threat of a baseball bat? I’ve endured much worse to get what I want, Alice.”
“Stop calling me that.” The mention of my real name sends chills throughout my spine. “You need to go. I’m not afraid of you anymore, Peter. You can’t hurt me, and I’m certainly not about to let you take Nick from me. My life is different now. I’ll do whatever it takes.”
“You’re challenging me? Don’t make threats you know you can’t handle. If I want what we had back I’m going to get it, one way or another.”
I may be shaking and petrified, but I refuse to back down. “I’m not the woman you used to know. Your abuse changed me. I’m not afraid of you, or whatever you try to throw my way. I’m Nick’s only parent. He doesn’t need you in his life. I don’t care if you supplied the sperm. You’re nothing but a donor to me. He may as well have been made in a lab. That’s how little you have to do with his life. If you know what’s good for you, you’ll leave. Get out of here. Don’t come back. There’s nothing for you here, more importantly nothing I’d ever let you have.”
“My family is here, and you’ve just given me more reason to stick around, at least until Nick can finish school. Unlike his mother who dropped out of high school, I happen to care about my son’s education. I won’t be leaving any time soon, at least not until I get what I want. I’ve missed you,” he says with an eerie tone. “I want you back, baby. We can all be together again. Isn’t that what you want? I’m sorry about yesterday. Don’t fight me. Let’s start over, you and me and Nick. We can go anywhere. Come on, I know you’ve missed me.” He reaches for me, but I back away, scared that his touch will result in my bones being broken if I look at him the wrong way. I can tell him he doesn’t scare me, but he’s fully aware how petrified I am to be this close to him.
I have to think fast, come up with something I can say that will make him go away, at least until I’m able to leave. He needs to know I’m not his possession and I won’t ever be again.
My hands are on my hips, my gaze fixed and serious. This has to appear real as I lie through my teeth. “I’m with a good man now.”
“So end it. Break up with him.”
I shake my head. “No. It’s not that simple. We’re getting married. He’s more man than you’ve ever been. I wouldn’t stand here threatening me if I were you. There’s a possibility you may end up tied to a cinderblock at the bottom of the ocean.” At the end of the day the psychopath has finally been bitch slapped, at least mentally. I’ve shocked him, flooded his black
heart with another reason he’ll never have me again. It’s almost exciting to watch him react.
I amble in the direction of my car before he can say anything else. I’m sobbing, weeping and shaking profusely. My nerves are shot and I’m panicking. What have I just implied? I don’t have a man to protect me. I’m all alone.
I’m driving, constantly checking the rearview for signs of Peter. I don’t know where to go or what to do. First things first. I head to the tavern and post a sign saying the business is closed temporarily. Then I drive back to my small rental, looking around at the little I’ve accumulated since moving back to Virginia years ago. Material objects. That’s all they are. The only thing of importance is my son, and now he’s going against my wishes to be with his father.
I keep wondering how long he’ll be sticking around, and how I’m supposed to keep pretending I’m involved with another man, engaged even.
It’s killing me.
I throw things around.
I weep.
I scream.
I shower and cry some more.
I do it until I feel like there aren’t tears left. My head is pounding. I’m sick to my stomach.
Then there’s a knock on my door. Thinking it’s just my nosey neighbor hearing my sobs through the walls, I open it and get the shock of my life. It’s my landlord. His name is Carl Bernstein and he owns several properties on the island, and also lives next door to my parents. I wipe my face and try to greet him properly. “Carl, I wasn’t expecting you today.” He looks around at the place, spotting a few objects that are still laying on the floor as a result of my temper tantrum.
“I’m sorry I caught you at a bad time, Alice, but this couldn’t wait. I’ve decided to sell the property to an investor who is looking to tear it down to build a condominium. We talked about it last year, how this was a possibility. Do you recall the conversation?”
I nod, but vaguely remember.
Salt Water Wounds (Oyster Cove #1) Page 7
