“You women are devious, wonderful creatures,” her father said.
“And don’t you forget it,” his wife warned.
* * *
Solitude was overrated.
Three days of it and Jack felt like he was suffocating. Quiet. Too much damn quiet. He kept seeing Rita’s ghost in the penthouse. He heard her laugh. He caught her scent in the guest room she’d used and ached for her in a way he wouldn’t have thought possible.
It was worse somehow, knowing that she was in Utah. Jack hadn’t really believed Cass when she told him that Rita had left the damn state. So he’d driven to Seal Beach, walked past the bakery and got a chill when he saw the closed sign on the door.
He’d driven her off and she’d actually left. He should be happy. Instead, he felt...hollowed out. Like a shell of the man he used to be. At that thought, he imagined what Rita would say to it and he could almost hear her. Whose fault is that, Jack? Who keeps running away from life?
Shaking his head free of irritating thoughts and reminders of all he’d lost, Jack turned his attention back to the stack of papers waiting for his signature. He’d been spending more time than usual in the office because it beat the hell out of being alone in the penthouse with too many memories.
“I’ll get over it. Hell,” he murmured, scrawling his name along the bottom of a contract, “she’ll get over it.”
“Mr. Buchanan?” Linda stood just inside the open door to his office.
“What is it?”
“Marketing reports The Sea Queen is now sold-out.”
“Good. Great.” The cruise liner would be a huge success, one more feather in the Buchanan family cap and Jack couldn’t have cared less. “Is there anything else?”
“Just one thing.” Linda stepped back, a smirk on her face and Rita sailed past her into the room.
The door closed behind her, but Jack hardly noticed. All he could see was her. That amazing hair of hers was a tumble of dark curls. Her eyes were sizzling. She wore black slacks, a lime-green shirt that clung to the mound of her belly and a white linen jacket over the shirt. Black sandals were on her feet and her toenails were a bright purple.
He’d never seen anything more gorgeous in his life.
Standing up behind his desk, he curbed the urge to go to her and grab hold of her. He’d done the right thing and he wasn’t going to backtrack now. “Rita. I thought you were in Utah.”
She tipped her head to one side and gave him a cool glare. “Hoping I’d stay so far away you’d never have to think about me again?”
“No.” There was nothing on this earth that could keep him from thinking about her. “I just—”
“I didn’t come to chat, Jack,” she said, cutting him off as she dug into the oversize black tote slung over her shoulder. She pulled out a large manila envelope and handed it to him.
“What’s this?”
“It’s an ultrasound picture of your daughter.”
His eyes widened, his jaw dropped and his fingers tightened on the envelope. “I thought you didn’t want to know what the baby is.”
“Turns out,” she said, “surprises aren’t as much fun as I used to think they were.”
Okay, he knew that was a dig for the way he’d ended things between them. And fine, she was due a fair share of hits. He could take it. Then what she’d said suddenly hit him.
“A daughter?”
“Yes,” she said, and clutched her fingers around the handle of her bag. “It’s a girl. And I wanted you to know.”
“Thanks for that...”
“I didn’t do it to be nice, Jack,” she said, interrupting him. “I came here to tell you that I’m not running away. I’m not you. I don’t hide.”
“I’m not hiding.”
“Call it whatever you want to,” she said, voice tight. “It amounts to the same thing.”
Sunlight spilled into the office through the wide windows, lying in long, golden rectangles across the floor. Rita stood in one of those slices of light and it was as if she were glowing from the inside. Even the ends of her hair shone, and the sunlight was reflected in her whiskey eyes, making them look as if they were on fire.
“You’re upset, I know,” he started.
“Damn right I’m upset, Jack.” She stopped, took a long breath and steadied herself. “But I didn’t come here to get into another futile argument, either.”
Still holding the envelope he wanted very badly to open, he asked, “Why are you here, then?”
“To tell you that I’m staying. Our daughter will be raised by me, in the apartment over the bakery. I’ll tell her all about you, but you’re not going to be a part of our lives, Jack.”
“You can’t keep her from me.”
“Watch me,” Rita countered. “You don’t want her or me. You just want to do what you think is the ‘right’ thing. Well, I don’t care about that. My daughter’s going to grow up loved. Happy. And if her father isn’t willing to give up his self-pity party long enough to be grateful to be alive, then he just won’t be a part of our lives.”
“Self-pity?” He repeated the words because they’d slapped him hard enough to make an impact. Was that who he was? Who he’d become? Was she right? “That’s what you think?”
“Jack,” she sighed out his name. “If you ever manage to work your way out of that cocoon you’ve wrapped yourself in long enough to realize you love me, let me know. Until then? Goodbye, Jack.”
He looked up as Rita turned around, stormed across the room and out the door, slamming it behind her.
* * *
Jack fell asleep that night, still holding the ultrasound picture he couldn’t get out of his head. A daughter. A little girl. Torn between desire and caution, he wasn’t sure which move to make. And then the dream came.
It was hot. So hot every breath seared his lungs. He squinted into the too-bright sunlight and signaled to his men for quiet as they approached the village.
Shots were fired. Explosions rocked all around them, making his ears ring. Someone screamed and another shot fired and Jack was down. Pain burst in a hot ball in the center of his chest. Air caught in his lungs, refusing to move in or out. Jack stared up at a brassy sky, the sun beating down mercilessly and he knew he was dying.
But this wasn’t how it happened. The dream was wrong.
Then Kevin was there, leaning over him. Jack looked up at his friend. “I’m hit. I’m hit bad.”
“Yeah, dude. It doesn’t look good.”
“But this is wrong. You were wounded, not me.” Jack breathed past the pain, felt it sliding through his body. “Help me, Kev. Do something. I did it for you.”
“Yeah, you did.” Kevin grinned and was suddenly in a wheelchair. “And I appreciate it. Wish I could help you now, bro. But it’s all on you.”
None of this made sense. Jack looked around. The sand. The sun. The men. Everything was the way it always was in his dream. Well, except for Kevin, grinning like a moron at him from a chair.
“What’s so funny? Do something, damn it!”
“Nothing I can do, dude,” Kevin assured him. “It’s a heart shot. You’re done for. There’s no hope.”
Panic roared through him followed by fury. Damned if he’d end like this. “What the hell kind of help is that? Call a medic. Slap a bandage on my chest.”
“Hearts can’t be healed with a damn bandage, man. You’re way past that.”
Fear and fury were a tangled knot inside him. “Then what do I do?”
“You already know that, Jack,” Kevin said. “You’re not shot, man. Your heart’s broken and the only way to fix it is to find Rita and make this right. It’s as good as over for you.”
Reaching down, he held out one hand and waited for Jack to take it. Then Kevin pulled him to his feet and slapp
ed Jack on the back. “The only way out is Rita.”
“Rita.” Jack looked down at his chest. He wasn’t bleeding. He was healthy enough. He was just...lost. Lifting his head, he glanced around. The dream had changed. The desert was gone.
He was on the beach, the roar of the sea pounding in his brain. And there was Rita, standing at the shoreline as she had been on the first night he’d seen her. And just like that, Jack knew Kevin was right. He felt as if his heart had been ripped out of his chest. It was over for him.
It had been over from the first moment he’d seen her.
Just the memory of her was strong enough to tear down the dream that had been haunting him for months. Rita had drawn him out, with the help of an old friend.
But when he turned to thank Kevin, the man was gone. Looking back down the beach, he saw Rita, holding a baby girl with dark brown curls and bright eyes. He started toward them just as Rita smiled. Then slowly, she and the baby faded until they finally disappeared completely. When he stood alone on the darkened beach, pain hit him like a fist.
Fix this, he told himself, or lose everything.
Jack woke with a start and sat straight up in bed. His mind racing, heart pounding, he realized so many truths at once, he was breathless. Maybe it made sense that the lesson he needed to learn had come from Kevin. He’d think about that later. Right now, he knew what he had to do, so he lunged for his cell phone on the bedside table. He punched in a familiar number and waited interminably as it rang on the other end.
“Dad? Yeah, it’s me, Jack.” He walked out onto the terrace, into the teeth of the wind and had never felt warmer in his life.
“Jack? Are you all right?” his father asked. “What time is it?”
He winced and glanced at the clock. Two o’clock. He rubbed his eyes and laughed shortly. Taking a deep breath, Jack realized that for the first time in months, he didn’t have a cold stone in his belly. In fact, he felt pretty good.
“Weirdly enough,” he said, “I think I am all right. Or I will be. I’m sorry it’s so late, but look. I need you to do something for me.”
Eleven
“So have you thought of a name for her yet?”
Rita looked at her bakery manager and shook her head. “No, but I have plenty of time.”
“Yeah, you do. But just remember, Casey’s a great name for a girl.”
Laughing, Rita slid the tray of cookies into the oven. It was good to be home. She’d needed that visit to her family, but being here was what felt right. Back in her apartment over the bakery, doing familiar work with people she loved, it was all good.
Sure, she missed Jack desperately, and there was an ache around her heart that she was really afraid would be permanent. But she would learn to live with it. Learn to live without him, because she had to.
“Thanks, Casey, I’ll keep that in mind.”
When her phone rang, Rita answered, still laughing. “Hello?”
“Rita, this is Thomas.”
Jack’s father? For a second a thread of fear wound through her. Was Jack okay? Had something happened? Would she always be wondering about him? The answer was of course, yes.
Sighing, she said, “Hi, Thomas, everything all right?”
“Oh, yes, yes. Everything is great, really. I was just wondering, though, if you might do an old man a favor.”
Setting the timer on the oven, Rita wandered to the refrigerator and pulled out a bottle of water. She uncapped it, took a long drink and said, “Of course. What can I do?”
She heard the smile in his voice when he said, “I hoped you could come down to The Sea Queen to see me.”
“You’re on the ship?”
“Yes,” he said. “I’m taking the first cruise. Thought I’d get a little golf in on the islands. But there’s something I’d like to give you before I go.”
Rita did some fast thinking. She really liked Jack’s father and just because the man’s son was behaving like a loon didn’t mean she couldn’t be close to his family. Thomas was, after all, her daughter’s grandfather. And Jack’s sister was going to be the baby’s doctor. Family mattered, whether Jack could see that or not. “Of course I can. What time do you want me there?”
“Wonderful,” he said, pleasure ringing in his voice. “As for what time, the sooner the better.”
Now she was curious. Jack hadn’t said anything to her about his dad going on the first cruise. But then, she told herself, maybe he didn’t know. What could Thomas possibly have to give her that was important enough for her to go scurrying down to the harbor just before the ship sailed? “Okay, I’ll just arrange for my manager to take over and I’ll come right down.”
“Thank you, Rita. I’ll leave word at the dock and they’ll bring you to my suite.”
“Okay, then,” she said, still baffled, “I’ll see you soon.”
She hung up and just stared at the phone for a second or two. Rita had no idea what was going on, but the sooner she got to the harbor, the quicker she’d find out.
* * *
Half an hour later, she was boarding the ship and being met by a young man in a navy shirt and sharply creased white slacks. The Sea Queen was stitched onto the breast pocket of his shirt and just below, he wore a name tag that read “Darren.”
“Mrs. Buchanan?” he asked and when she nodded, he said, “If you’ll come with me, Mr. Buchanan is waiting in the owner’s suite.”
The crowds were frantic. People rushing around, having their pictures taken, waving to people on the dock. Children ran past her, their laughter hanging in their wake. The scent of the sea flavored the air and Rita lifted her face into the wind briefly before boarding an elevator with Darren.
“Everyone seems really excited,” she said.
“They are,” Darren assured her. “It’s a great ship and it’s always fun to go out on the first cruise.”
Probably would be, she thought and told herself that one day she’d have to try it. Right now, sitting on an island beach with nothing to do sounded pretty good.
She had no idea what deck they were on when the elevator stopped and they stepped off into a luxurious hallway. But it was quiet with none of the eager abandon down on the main decks. Darren led her to a door at the end of the hall, then opened it for her.
“Mr. Buchanan said you should just go on inside, ma’am,” he said, then strode quickly away, back to the elevator.
Rita walked into the massive suite, closed the door behind her and for a second, all she could do was stare with her mouth open. It was more than elegant. It was opulent.
Midnight blue carpeting was so plush her feet sank into it. There was a huge living area, with a flat-screen TV, an electric fireplace and several couches and chairs all done in cream-colored fabric. There was a bar, and out on the private balcony, she could see a table and chairs as well as lounges.
She’d love to get a look at the rest of the suite before she left, but for right now... “Thomas?”
Someone stepped into the room from the terrace, but it wasn’t Thomas. Even before he spoke, she knew it was Jack because her blood started bubbling and her heart leaped into a gallop.
“Thanks for coming, Rita,” Jack said.
She backed up. Cowardly, yes; she’d be embarrassed later. “What’re you doing here? Where’s your father?”
“That’s the thing. He’s not here. I asked him to call you for me, since I figured you wouldn’t speak to me anyway.”
“You were right about that,” she snapped and turned for the door. She had to get out of there. Off the ship, back to the bakery
.
But Jack was too fast and his legs were much longer than hers. He beat her to the door and stood with his back against it, blocking her way.
“Move, Jack.”
“Not yet.”
“You really don’t want to push me right now,” she warned, though she didn’t know what she could do to move him if he didn’t want to be moved. Gina would kick him, but Rita just wasn’t the kicking kind. Too bad.
“Just hear me out. Then if you want to leave, I won’t stop you.”
“Why should I?”
One corner of his mouth quirked up and her heart thudded painfully in her chest. “Because you’re curious. Admit it.”
She hated that he was right. Hated that he could make her body burn with a half smile and hated that just standing this close to him made her want to lean in and take a bite of his lower lip. “Fine. Talk.”
He shook his head. “Not here. Come in. Sit down.”
When he took her arm, she pulled free of his grasp. She didn’t trust herself to stay mad if he was touching her and she really wanted to stay mad. She’d earned it, hadn’t she?
“No,” she said. “I’m not sitting down. I’m not staying. Just say whatever it is you want said and get it over with.” She felt a little wobbly. Too many emotions churning inside at the same time. Didn’t he know how hard this was for her? Didn’t he care at all? Shaking her hair back, she said, “Unless you’ve brought me here to declare undying love, then just let me go, okay?”
“That’s why you’re here,” he said softly.
“What?” She couldn’t have heard him right, Rita told herself. Jack wouldn’t have said that unless he had another agenda. “What’re you saying, Jack?”
“I love you.”
She swayed in place and he instinctively reached out one hand to steady her. Tears blurring her vision, Rita slapped at his hand. “No, you don’t. You’re just telling me what you think I want to hear.”
Little Secrets--His Unexpected Heir Page 15
