Trey fell over, hands covering his head, his yell echoing across the beach as he stared up, and up, at Goose. I threw my hands up in the air, whooping loudly as my dragon flew. Nicolas had been right; it was mostly instinct. Goose knew exactly what to do, his wings flapping at the right moments, his legs tucked in under his body, and his tail acting as a rudder as he flew. His shadow was a dark blur against the sand as it passed first over Trey, then Nicolas and me as Goose turned in the air and flew over us. I chased after him, laughing and crying at the same time.
“That actually worked,” Nicolas said in awe. “Do you think Trey planned on that happening?”
“Who cares?” I said, waving as Goose flew over us, honking excitedly. “He’s flying! That’s all that matters!”
As Trey trudged back toward us, grinning, Nicolas put a hand on my shoulder, turning me so I was looking at him. His expression had gone serious. “Neri… Are you and Goose…? Are you bonded?”
“I…” I stared down at the sand as Goose passed over us once more. A thrill of excitement rushed through me and I realized I was experiencing Goose’s emotions mixed with mine.
It must have been written all over my face because Nicolas nodded. “I thought so.”
“No one else knows.”
“They’ll figure it out—if they haven’t already. It’s pretty obvious. You can read his expressions and it’s like he’s talking to you, right?” Nicolas asked. “That’s how it is with me and Aristo. He seems to read me better than I can read him, though. It’s impossible to hide anything from him.”
I breathed out slowly. “All this time, I thought I’d been imagining what Goose was thinking or feeling, to… I don’t know, make myself feel better or something.”
“It’s not your imagination.” Nicolas smiled. “I bet you can also feel what he’s feeling.”
“Yes.” I clutched my fingers together, wondering if Goose could feel my anxiety right now. “Nic, what if I’m not good enough for him?”
He shook his head. “That’s ridiculous. You two are perfect for one another. I’m glad you bonded with him, Neri. Maya always said she wished you could have a dragon of your own.”
There was such a mighty pain in my heart, like I was being stabbed, that Goose cried out, faltering in the sky. I screamed, thinking he was about to plummet to the earth—he wasn’t that high up, but still enough distance to injure himself if he fell—but he managed to right himself at the last moment. As Trey reached us, asking what was going on, Goose aimed for the ground. His descent was sloppy and he hit the sand hard, his wings akimbo.
We ran to him, but the dragon got to his feet before we could reach him and honked loudly, giving us a toothy grin. I threw myself against him, hugging him fiercely. “You beautiful, wonderful dragon,” I said. “You’re amazing, you know that? You just need to work on your landing.”
He bumped me with his head and I knew he was chiding me for distracting him. Goose’s blue eyes turned serious as he looked up and down, asking me if I was all right.
“I was thinking about Maya,” I said. “She would be so proud of you, Goose.”
“And of you, Neri,” Nicolas said as he and Trey joined us. “She’d be proud of both of you.”
Chapter Twenty
When Senia came to collect her nephew, Goose showed her what he could do. Her jaw dropped when Goose went airborne.
“Finally,” was all she said.
At first Goose was a cautious flier, never going too high or venturing too far, but as the weeks passed and the weather turned colder, his confidence grew. He stopped walking down the mountain and flew to my house instead, standing outside my bedroom window before the sun had even risen, honking until I opened the window and hollered at him to shut up.
“It’s going to snow tomorrow,” Senia said as we sat by the lake one morning. Trey was at school; after Maya’s death, I’d stopped going. I couldn’t concentrate; my mind was filled with thoughts of my sister and my dragon. My parents, surprisingly, hadn’t pushed me to go. They were giving me the time I needed to mourn and hoped I would return when I was ready, but I had no idea if I ever would. How would I know when I was ready? Would I wake up one day and say, “This is it. This is the day I can move on.”?
I had a feeling Senia was right about snow. The air was frosty, our breaths making white balls of smoke that amused Goose to no end as he chased after them, trying to catch them with his mouth. He couldn’t breathe fire yet and I wondered if he would chase after his own smoke once he could.
“We won’t visit you until the storm has passed,” Senia continued. I nodded, expecting that. At least it wouldn’t be the entire winter. I could manage a few days without seeing Goose. It would be boring, but I could do it.
I was sitting on the ground, leaning against Senia’s back. She radiated enough heat that the cold wasn’t bothering me, although I was dressed in layers and wearing my heavy wool coat and gloves. I preferred the summer, but there was a certain beauty about winter. The lake had frozen in spots, and its clear surface shone like glass in the sun. Goose had tried to investigate, but Senia had barked at him to stay away.
“The last thing I want to do is dive into those freezing waters after him,” she’d said with a sniff. Apparently Senia wasn’t a fan of winter.
Senia shifted under me. “It would help if you tell Goose to remain in the caves until the storm finishes. Or else he’ll end up flying through the snow and either getting lost or hurt.”
I swallowed hard. The thought of my dragon getting hurt was too horrible to consider. “Do you think he’ll even listen to me?”
Her golden eyes studied me. “Nerine, are we still going to continue to pretend that there’s no bond between you two?”
“Uh… What?” I moved away from her, which I regretted the moment I felt how cold it was.
Clucking, Senia pulled me back toward her with her tail. “Nerine.” Her tone of voice was surprisingly patient.
“I wasn’t pretending!” I said. “I just… I didn’t know how you’d react. Or Aristo.”
“Aristo.” Senia shook her head. “Don’t ever waste a moment of your time worrying over him. He’s thrilled you bonded with his son.”
“And what about you?” I asked in a small voice.
The dragon sat up straighter, her head held high. “A bond between a dragon and a human is sacred. It’s as rare and important as a hatchling. You saved my nephew. I am honored you bonded with him, Nerine. I wouldn’t want it to be anyone else.”
She kept quiet as I scrubbed at my eyes. “Thank you.”
“You’re welcome. But I feel I should… That is, I should warn you… I mean, not warn you, but…” When I saw the dragon was having trouble saying something, dread crept over me. Was there something about the bond that I didn’t know about? Was I holding Goose back, maybe?
“Senia, what is it?” I asked when she remained silent.
“Goose is different,” she said, watching her nephew sitting by the edge of the lake staring at the birds swimming in the parts of the water that weren’t frozen. His tail wagged back and forth like a dog’s. As if sensing us talking about him, he turned to look at us over his shoulder, flashing a grin before resuming his watch of the geese and ducks.
“Different how?”
Senia sighed. “I don’t think he’s ever going to talk, Nerine. Not the way you and I do. That’s why I’m so glad he bonded with you. A bonded pair doesn’t need words to communicate. I often saw our sisters having entire conversations without saying a single word.”
I remembered that. It used to drive me crazy with jealousy. Now I would give just about anything to see them doing it again. “So he should have been talking by now? I knew it!”
“You saw what it was like in the cave that night. When Grendel’s tail hit Goose’s egg, I thought he’d killed him.” Senia’s voice was shaking slightly. My stomach clenched painfully as I remembered what the egg had looked like, with the large crack and the liquid I’d originally though
t was blood trailing down the side of the shell. “Grendel must have hit Goose’s head. He must have done something—”
“I don’t care,” I said fiercely. “I don’t care if he never says a word, Senia. Or if he acts differently from the other dragons. It doesn’t matter. He’s perfect the way he is.”
“I know that,” she said. “But I felt I should tell you. I’ve been holding this in for so long. I didn’t know what to say, or if I should say anything, but the longer he went without speaking… I guess I hoped you’d figure it out eventually on your own.”
“He’s smart. He’s clever. He’s insightful and thoughtful and caring. I don’t know what happened when Grendel hit his egg, and I don’t care.” My throat was thick with tears and I had to swallow a few times before I could finish. “I wouldn’t want him any other way, Senia.”
She nudged me hard with her nose, knocking me over onto my back. “And you worried I wouldn’t accept your bond with my nephew?”
I pushed her away. “All right, all right. I was wrong. Just like you were wrong that Goose is a bad name.”
“It’s a horrible name!”
“It’s a perfect name and he loves it. Right, Goose?” I called to the gray dragon. He honked and came running over, lying down next to me when he saw me sprawled on the ground. Rolling over so he was on his back, too, Goose began kicking his legs in the air and I copied him, laughing when he honked excitedly.
Watching him, I thought, Don’t ever change.
He turned his head and gave me a smile so wide I saw every one of his pointy teeth.
***
As Senia had predicted, it snowed the next day. Large flakes fell from the sky, trapping us indoors for nearly two days. When the storm finally broke, Trey walked over and helped me shovel a pathway from my front door to the road. As we worked, two large shadows passed over us before landing on the lawn. Goose gave an excited scream and started tossing snow everywhere, ruining all our hard work.
“You beast!” Trey yelled, shaking his shovel at Goose. The dragon used his tail to swing a large clump of snow at Trey, knocking him over. “Oh, now you’re asking for it!”
We quickly forgot about shoveling as we started an impromptu snowball fight. Even Senia got into it, copying her nephew by hurling snow at us with her long tail. By lunchtime we were soaking wet and my cheeks hurt from laughing so much.
This, I thought. This is what I want. Laughter and good times with the ones I love the most in this world.
Please don’t let me lose anyone else that I care about.
Goose must have sensed the change in my mood because he stopped tossing snow at some of the neighborhood kids who’d joined our fight and tromped to my side. His gray scales were glistening with both sweat and snow as he looked me over. Fearing what he intended, I held up my hands and backed away. “Hey, stay back. I don’t like that look in your eyes. What are you plan—ahh!” I screamed as he grabbed me by the back of my coat and lifted me up, much like Senia had done the day on the mountain. And just like his aunt, Goose tossed me onto his back, spread out his wings, and took off.
“No, Goose!” I wrapped my arms around his neck, holding on as tight as I dared. My eyes were squeezed shut as we ascended higher and higher, Goose’s wings beating out a gentle rhythm. When he steadied out, he growled, his impatience washing over me. I cracked one eye open, and then the other, and gasped.
Nicolas had been right. The sight of Meradell after a snowstorm was unlike anything I’d imagined. It was an endless field of white spread over the buildings, the roads, the trees of the forest, the mountains and even the beach, making everything look pristine and new.
Up here, with the wind rushing against us, Goose making slight adjustments to keep us steady and balanced, I could forget my heartache as I focused on the beauty. Life was painful and difficult, but there were moments like this that could take your breath away.
I would always miss my sister. Losing her would always hurt. The day that pain disappeared was the day I forgot about her, and I would never let that happen.
But I wouldn’t let that pain control me. I would learn to live with it, the way I knew Maya would want me to. It wasn’t just about me anymore. Goose was depending on me, as much as I depended on him.
I’d lost so much, but I’d found him.
“Thank you,” I said, the wind stealing my words away. But Goose glanced at me over his shoulder, letting me know he’d heard me. “You and me, Goose. We’re going to get through whatever life throws our way because we’re together.”
Always, he seemed to be saying as he continued to gaze at me, his blue eyes warm.
“Always,” I echoed.
Chapter Twenty-one
Winter passed quietly. Storms came and went, along with Goose and Senia. The mornings after a big storm, Goose waited for me to climb on his back so we could go flying.
The sight never failed to impress us.
I knew I couldn’t continue to ride him bareback. It was dangerous and foolish, not to mention uncomfortable. When I broached the subject with Nicolas, he took me to the local saddler who’d helped design a saddle for Nicolas to use when riding Aristo.
“Goose is going to keep growing,” Nicolas warned as the saddler measured Goose’s body. “So you’re going to have to come back every few months for adjustments.”
When my sixteenth birthday rolled around in the early spring, my parents insisted on throwing me a party and inviting the entire neighborhood. They’d never done such a thing before, not for me or Maya, and I initially protested it. But when I saw their faces fall, I changed my mind and told them it’d be fine.
All winter long, they’d watched me take to the skies with frightened looks on their faces, like they expected me to never return. Goose and I never went too far or too high, but that didn’t stop my parents from worrying. Even though I felt guilty for causing them fear, I couldn’t stop even if I’d wanted to. I needed to fly nearly as much as Goose did. Those moments in the sky—when it was just the two of us with no expectations—were precious to both of us.
I’d explained the bond to my parents, and they’d reacted more or less how I expected. Worry mixed with awe. They loved Goose and counted him as the reason I’d been able to go on after Maya’s death. But a bond hadn’t been strong enough to save Maya. Would it keep me alive?
I didn’t know how to answer that. I couldn’t reassure them that everything would be all right. “It’s not like I can see into the future,” I’d told Senia a week before my birthday. “I wish I could relieve them of their fears, but how?”
“Every parent wants to keep their children safe,” Senia said, a contemplative look on her face. I wondered if she was thinking about Aster, and if her sister would approve of the job Senia was doing raising Goose.
The day of my birthday, I spent the better part of an hour combing and styling my hair until it hung in loose waves down my back. Then I slipped into my new dress, a gift from Mom, and stood in front of the mirror. The dress was a pale shade of yellow with a clinched waist that fell past my knees. When it came time to fly, I would change into my trousers, but I didn’t mind the dress.
“You look so grown up,” Mom said from the doorway, wiping at her eyes.
I, too, felt on the verge of tears. There shouldn’t have been an empty space next to Mom. Maya should have been lingering in the hallway or standing next to me, helping me with my hair while she teased me. “I wish she were here.”
“Me too, Neri.” Mom pulled me into a hug as we looked at the mirror together. “My big girl. You’re a lady now, and you’re so beautiful.” Shaking her head, she laughed sheepishly. “I’m glad you got my green eyes. Don’t tell Dad, but I always thought his brown eyes were boring.”
“Mom!” I scolded, although secretly, I agreed with her. Maya used to tell me how jealous she was that I’d ended up with green eyes while she’d inherited Dad’s brown ones. I’d spent the better part of my life being jealous of my sister, so to hear her say that a
lways filled me with a stupid sense of pride.
Oh, how dumb I had been, to waste my time being jealous of Maya when I should have been clinging to every precious moment we had together. Why had I been so reckless? Why did I think our time together was infinite?
“Promise me you’ll be careful,” Mom murmured, still hugging me.
After the party, after the presents were opened and the cake was eaten, Goose was taking me up into the mountains. Senia said she had something she wanted to show me. I’d spent the week pestering her for more details, but the dragon was even more stubborn than me and refused to say another word.
“Goose won’t let anything happen to me,” I said. When Mom gave me a look, I sighed. “I promise we’ll be fine, Mom. It’s just up to the mountains and back home. You’ll barely know I’m gone.”
Her face tightened. “I always know when you’re gone. It’s like I can’t breathe, like someone is pressing down on my chest, until I see you walk through that front door, safe.”
“Mom…” I didn’t want to fight with her ever, but especially not on my birthday when we were expected to greet the party guests with a smile and clear eyes. “I can’t hide from the world.”
“I know. And I wouldn’t want you to.” She pulled away and shook her head. “Don’t listen to me. I’m being silly.”
“No, you’re just being a mom. There’s nothing wrong with that.” I smiled. “I love you, Mom.”
“I love you too, Neri. Me and your dad, both. And we’re so proud of you for all that you’ve done so far, and for what you’re going to do in the years to come,” Mom said. “We worry about you because we know you and Goose are meant to do so much more than live a quiet, quaint life in Meradell. There’s a reason you saved his egg that day, and I can’t wait to see how it turns out.”
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