The Price of Penny

by T. C. Rybicki

  “Come on, Penny. Whether it’s your business is irrelevant. Can you at least admit you’re upset? I want you to be, actually.”

  “That’s a weird thing to say. And I’m not, but if you did this as payback, I’ll have you know it was failure because I don’t care. Like I keep saying, we’re only friends.”

  “You are a terrible liar and I don’t mean that the way it sounds, but if you’re upset then at least I know we still have a chance. Please tell me that you can forgive my stupidity. I don’t want to screw up our potential.”

  I insisted we didn’t have potential.

  “Yes, we do. I lied the other day. I want so much more than friendship with you. I didn’t want to scare you away.”

  “I’m not scared of you.” He touched me again and this time he was directly in front of me. Chet was so close. He started to stroke my cheek with the back of his hand.

  “It’s okay to be scared, I am. I’m not good at this either. Can we start over, please?” His intense gaze hypnotized me. “Penelope Kopernik, you fascinate me. I think you’re beautiful. I want to know everything there is to know about you, but only when you’re ready to share yourself with me. I agree to take this one day, one step at a time. Please, say you’ll still hang out with me.”

  I took a deep breath. “Yes, but just as friends.” He slowly nodded and backed off a bit. Chet pulled his hand away, the oven beeped; it was time to put the bread in. I added one last piece of information, “For now.”

  I kept trying to decipher what ‘for now’ meant. Did she mean friends for now and then more than friends eventually or did she mean she would be my friend only for a little while longer? I didn’t dare ask, too worried it might be the latter. That soup she dished up actually looked and smelled amazing. I finally agreed to give the bread a try first and then maybe my stomach could handle a little bowl of soup. Penny poured me a large glass of ice water and sat two tablets down beside it. I picked them up and swallowed without hesitation.

  “I might be poisoning you because I’m pretty disappointed in you at the moment.”

  I drank half the cup down with an “ahh.” She eyed me sternly. I liked that about her. “Death by Penny. I’ll take my chances. Doesn’t sound too bad.”

  “They were ibuprofen.”

  “Okay. I trust you.”

  She asked if I wanted to watch something on Maggie’s TV. That was by far the best invitation I’d ever had. We headed back to her sister’s room. There was a single chair beside the nightstand and a bed. I’d sat in the chair the last time I was in there, but in my mind I was already saying, please invite me to sit on the bed with you. No way could I ever try anything with her. I’d barely survived this step of moving on and forgetting what I’d done the night before. Penny wanted friendship, but she knew I wanted more and she was still willing to give it a shot. I wanted to be next to her so bad, I couldn’t think of anything else. We could even sit there and stare at the blank screen with the TV switched off.

  She told me I could turn it on and find something; that she was going to her room for her Snuggie. Hot damn, she was ridiculously cute and sexy all rolled into one tight package. I didn’t know a single soul with a Snuggie. My dilemma was straight in front of me. Do I presume it’s fine to kick off my shoes and make myself comfy on her sister’s bed? I thought of my buddy Wayne and what he’d said to me countless times. Sometimes, it felt like my actual middle name. You’re Chet fucking Parker. I was going to sit on the bed.

  Penny walked back in with Pepper on her heels and the most God-awful brown blanket with arms I’d ever seen. “I know, it’s hideous.”

  “Were they all out of the pretty ones at the Snuggie store?” Then I mumbled one other thing. “If there is such thing.”

  Kate got them each one last Christmas. “Mags has Wonder Woman.”

  “Oh, well, that’s kinda cool. Wonder Woman’s hot.”

  “Yes, but there can’t be two Wonder Woman, obviously. She picked out the neutral one for me. I’m sure that’s what Mum sees when she looks at me. My personality screams tan.” Penny didn’t hesitate. She plopped down on the mattress. Yes. I was the man, she was going to take the bed too. “Did you find something?”

  “Um, no, not yet. Let’s scroll through. Are we watching television or searching for a movie?”

  Penny admitted she didn’t know what she was in the mood for. I was in the mood for her, so I couldn’t care less what we settled on. She mentioned checking out one of the Netflix originals. “Hey, what about that women’s prison show? I heard it’s really good.”

  “Um, no, thank you. I’m not watching that with you.”

  “Why not?”

  “Because Maggie made me watch the first season, so, just no. Never. No way. Hey, stop on that. I wouldn’t mind checking out that Marco Polo show. I have a weakness for historical dramas.”

  Interesting, possibly boring, but she was full of surprises. I teased her since they only had one season so far and she preferred more stable programs that wouldn’t let her down.

  “It’s fine, I happen to know the second season is coming out soon.”

  I had little hope for this show about the Mongolian Empire. After suffering from a killer hangover, I questioned whether I could keep my eyes open after the first ten minutes. I recharged after the first pair of tits made an appearance on the screen. Penny shifted away, but didn’t say anything. By the end, the pleasure tent scene had the makings of a full orgy.

  “This show isn’t half bad.”

  She hit the pause and turned to face me. “Maybe this wasn’t the best choice.”

  “Why? I’m actually getting into it. I’m learning so much.”

  She pushed at my shoulder. “Shut up, you were almost asleep for the majority of it. A few boobies are zoomed in on and now it’s a blockbuster series. This is exactly why I didn’t want to watch the other show with you.”

  I pointed at the television. She’d paused on the actual boobies and I was snickering.

  “Really? Are you twelve? Boobs make you giggle? I think we need a different show to get into if we’re going to hang out again.”

  I talked her into turning it back on. I was only messing with her. However, I found it necessary to come clean. Boobs could revert any grown man into his twelve-year-old self. “Sorry, we can’t help it.”

  She got the next episode going as soon as the first ended. We both relaxed and settled in a comfortable arrangement. X kept calling, but I kept dismissing it. I wasn’t about to talk to him in front of her especially after Penny snuggled a little closer. I couldn’t slip away from her. It took almost an hour, into the second episode before we were actually touching like I wanted.

  Xavier finally sent a text instead.

  Where are you, man? FYI, I thought you’d be happy to know, you didn’t seal the deal!

  I jumped forward. Penny was reclined on a bunch of pillows she stacked behind us. She hit the pause again. “What?”

  “I, um, I really need to make a phone call.”

  “Okay, I’ll give you some privacy.”

  I grabbed her by the wrist. I told her to stay put. “No, keep watching.” I wouldn’t miss anything. This show was slow in my book with glimpses of good stuff, but there seemed to be plenty of that. If I missed one of the good parts, there’d be another later. I had no idea what was going on if I was totally honest. Penny had me so distracted. I kept thinking bed, Penny, random hot women having sex on the TV, almost lying down, followed by damn, she smells amazing in no particular order.

  My phone buzzed again. “Hey. Wait just a minute.”

  Xavier never listened to me, he started up immediately. I caught bits and pieces. Amberlie fully confessed she and I didn’t actually have sex. My mind was blown. This was excellent. I held the phone away and mouthed to Penny I’d be right back. I didn’t even realize my slip up, but I’d hit the speaker button.

  “Did you hear me? I said Amberlie says you were a limp noodle.” An overwhelming sense of humiliation
overcame me. I was so flustered, I dropped my phone. Pepper went for it causing it to slide further away from me across the wood floor. Meanwhile, Xavier kept going on full volume. “Oh, she tried her best, but you passed out. She thought you’d be ready for her in the morning, but damn, bro. You’re one cold bastard. I can’t believe you didn’t even remember her name.”

  I finally got my cell phone back, slobber-coated, but I punched that damn speaker button as fast as my fingers would go. I turned around. Maybe there was a slim chance she wasn’t paying attention. I couldn’t assess her reaction just yet because Penny stared straight through me. Xavier rambled loudly in my ear so I walked out of the room. Pepper was on my heels. I let her out in the back and walked over to sit on the bench.

  “Shut the fuck up, X!” Finally, he quit flapping his jaw. I took a deep breath. “Start over, from the beginning.”

  I sat there and listened to the entire tale as it was retold by this stupid woman. Apparently, she said I invited her back to my room. I totally doubted that, I think she followed me instead. I didn’t want to hear all the other details, but Xavier said the condom was her idea, but I was out of it and couldn’t be roused in any way shape or form. No wonder, there was a wrapper on the floor. I didn’t even want to think about all the other parts, like who took off my clothes and if I participated in any sort of activities with her. I shook my head, further disgusted with myself. Then, Xavier had the nerve to ask for my praises.

  “A thank you very much is in order, don’t you think? You could send over my favorite booze at least.”

  “Thanks for what?”

  “I totally calmed that chick down. Do you really want this story out in public?”

  “Of course not. What did you do to make her chill?”

  “It was no easy task and Mark’s planning to come over when you least expect it and kick your ass.”

  I chuckled. That was never happening. That skinny twerp was maybe 135 pounds soaking wet and what was the point? His sister’s honor was still intact.

  “I had to promise her the VIP treatment for the premiere as well as a few minuscule details I won’t bore you with.”

  “What the hell, man? That means I might see her again.” I already had plans to invite Penny to my premiere even though it was months off. Xavier said I should be happy she didn’t post the small essay she composed about the real Chet Parker to all forms of social media. Honestly, there was no guarantee that wouldn’t still happen. I needed to tell Gage the story, so he could have a serious rebuttal prepared just in case. Gage had a whole list of what to do in case of particular emergencies. That was the last time I ever did anything questionable, and no way was anyone allowed to bring over guests to my place that I didn’t know well or invited myself.

  “We might need to drive the point across that she needs to drop this for good or she might be facing real problems.”

  “Daaaamn, that sounds ominous. What are you threatening, bro?”

  I explained my position and it was not exactly a threat. X and I both knew it would take a lot of something to put a guy our age completely out of commission, so if that’s what happened, then maybe Amber-whatever gave me a little extra something I didn’t ask for. She had no idea the backlash if she came forward with her full page smear campaign.

  “My fucking buddy is a savage beast. Not only, did you leave her high and dry, and forget her damn name, now you’re going to accuse her of drugging you. I love you, man!”

  “Knock it off, I only hinted at possibly suggesting such a thing. I don’t need that type of bad press. We’re going on the promo tour soon enough. Just keep me apprised if she seems like she’s going to get mouthy. I gotta go, this is over and I’m busy, so don’t call again. Bye.”

  I shoved my phone in my back pocket and stood up. Penny was on the steps when I turned around. There was probably a huge chance she was going to ask me to leave and I was worried about how much she actually heard.

  “Sorry about all that.”

  “So, you really didn’t hook up with some random college student last night?”

  “No, not like I thought.” I headed back toward her, Penny backed up and we both went inside. That was good, I wasn’t getting kicked out. “Hey, I know you heard some of that and I really should explain.” I desperately wanted Penny to know being a limp noodle was not a normal thing with me, but also not recalling names was also out of the norm. I also wasn’t actually going to threaten this woman, I was simply bringing up a what if. I knew there was a high probability Penny thought I was a true asshole right about now. I might have been the night before, but that wasn’t the real me.

  “Chet, it’s over. You got your answers. I’m glad you feel better about it, but again, we don’t have to hash this out.”

  We went back to Maggie’s room. I reached for Penny’s hand, she stopped, but she also pulled away. “I’m really sorry. I’m so ashamed and I need you to know that isn’t me. I will never drink that much again. Say something, please. Are we just going to start watching that stupid show again and pretend none of this happened?”

  “Hey, I resent that. I like Marco Polo, and you seem enamored with all the breasts. However, I do want to forget the rest, if that’s okay?”

  “Sure, it’s fine. But you know I’m way hotter than that guy, if that’s why you like this show so much.”

  She shook her head side to side. “Your humble demeanor is very refreshing. I wasn’t thinking about his good looks too much, but who says you’re hotter? That’s a matter of opinion.”

  I couldn’t stop staring at her with this goofy grin on my lips. Penny was so different, completely out of my league if I thought about it. Being with her was like nothing I’d experienced before.

  “Chet, before we start it back, there’s something I need to get off my chest. I’ve kept something from you too. You spilled some significant secrets to me today so if we plan to start with a fresh slate, I think I need to be honest as well. I said from the start, I don’t date, but I think I misled you. It isn’t just because Jordan died. I dated in college, a lot actually. I had something to prove to myself. The end results were disastrous. I’m not right. I mean, something’s wrong with me and you truly deserve better. I know you can meet much better women, nothing like this one from last night, she seems pushy and all wrong for you. The actual truth is, I can’t date you because I really like you.”

  Something told me, I was about to have my bubble burst. Penny dated a lot was still trying to register in my brain. I didn’t know why I was feeling jealous of college-aged, Penny’s dates. I had no right, but I had imagined her so differently, I guess. “You’re wrong. I told you no pressure. We’re just getting to know each other. Our pasts shouldn’t make a difference. I don’t want to spend time with anyone else at the moment. Why are you selling yourself short?”

  She told me about some of the creeps she dated. They were typical guys, trying to see what they could get straight out of the gate. Penny thought that was her problem at first, she’d picked unwisely. She’d get highly stressed anytime someone made a move on her. She shot them all down, but said the aftermath was always way worse than it should have been.

  “They all backed down. No one was aggressive, but I’d still get sick to my stomach, sometimes I got hives. It was like I was physically allergic to men. My friends tried to help because they felt sorry for me. Someone set me up with this graduate student. His name was Elliot, and he was pretty great.”

  I questioned in my mind how someone named Elliot could be described as great but I let her continue. “I still couldn’t feel settled. We took things so slow. You have no idea. The hand holding, incidental touching became tolerable, but the kissing was painful. I knew it wasn’t his fault, it was all me. One day, I gave myself a pep talk. I was already 22, I could be intimate with my boyfriend. He was an amazing man, the whole package. I needed to stop being such a weirdo.”

  This was the part I truly dreaded. I think Penny was about to spill about losing her virgin
ity and I had no choice but to listen and be supportive. She was obviously distressed discussing this with me. “You don’t have to explain.”

  “No, let me. You need to hear this. You need to know why I’m a dead end. I ended up at the hospital.”

  My fists clinched tight. Was she about to tell me she changed her mind and this idiot Elliot forced himself on her?

  But then she explained. “In a full blown panic/anxiety attack. I swear, Elliot thought I was having a real heart attack. It was terrible, and I was so upset, one of the residents on-call pulled Elliot aside and thoroughly questioned him. They were convinced he did something terrible to me. Of course, we broke up soon after. I think he’s happily married now and living in New Mexico. I’ve gone to a few doctors. I have a mental block to intimacy. When I’m confronted head-on, I physically react. That’s why it’s not fair of me to date, absolutely anyone, Chet. I wish I was normal. I’ve tried to be, but nothing has worked so far. When Jordan died, I broke in more ways than one.”

  I’d touched her several times and got the distinct impression it did not make her ill, so I took her hand again. This time Penny didn’t pull away. I was rubbing my thumb along the edge of hers. “Does my touch bother you? Be completely honest.”

  She looked like she was choosing her words carefully. “Well, that’s the thing. No, so far but . . .” she stopped talking and held her lip between her teeth.

  “Alright, that’s a start. Why don’t you let me decide if you’re worth my time then? I say definitely you are more than worth it. Anytime, you need me to back away, I will. You can even make up a code word if you need to. I don’t think there’s anything wrong with you, actually. You just haven’t met the right man yet. The relationship you shared with Jordan sounded intense. Maybe you freak out because you think you’re betraying him in some way. You’re not. I bet he’d be the first to tell you that if he could.”

  “You sound like Maggie.”

  “Well, Maggie can be pretty smart at times.”

  She giggled, “Sure, she’s known for her great brain.”