by Jayne Blue
I waved Addy off. I’d take care of these boys all by myself.
The leader of the group sat on the far right. He twirled a toothpick between his teeth and looked me up and down. Careful, I thought. No matter that we were on the outs, I knew Tommy would have told his thugs to watch their manners around me.
I leaned across the counter, keeping my smile in place. “You want to tell me what the hell you’re doing here?” Adrenaline rushed through me. I didn’t think Tommy’s anger would make him do anything stupid, but he’d sent his men here for a reason.
“Like you said,” the leader said. He had a cruel scar cutting through his right brow. Damon. I thought that was his name. He’d been one of Tommy’s drivers. I wondered whether this little trip meant a promotion or demotion. “We’re here for the scones.”
Addy took my hint and moved off out of earshot. She busied herself pouring coffee for the last booth she had left.
“And then what?” I asked. “You gonna tell me Crystal Falls just happened to be on your way to somewhere else?”
“Still feisty,” Damon said. “Boss told me to expect that. He’s just looking out for you.”
“How, exactly?”
“Receipts,” the man beside Damon said. Damon shot him a look. Apparently he was supposed to do all the talking.
“Receipts?” My blood ran cold. No. Hell no.
Damon reached for me. His hot fingers closed around my wrist. “Relax. Your brother’s doing you a favor.”
“A favor.” My breath came hot. Addy turned, watching the scene. I found my smile again and lowered my voice. “You tell Tommy I don’t need his kind of favors.”
“Receipts,” Damon said, whispering. “Go get ’em. Then we’ll be on our way.”
The bell over the front door chimed and things went from bad to worse. Damon let go of my wrist. I straightened and smoothed my apron. Beckett Finch and one of his tall, skinny deputies—Crane Wendall, I think it was—came into the dining room. My heart pounded clear up to my throat.
Beckett froze. Eyes narrowing, he looked at Damon and his companions. Hat in hand, he cleared his throat and made a path to the counter.
I prayed neither Beckett nor my brother’s men would antagonize each other. It would lead to questions on both sides I didn’t want. Tears stung my eyes as I felt the world start to crash down around me. Because it would. Tommy had the power to make that happen. Again.
Addy stepped in and poured Beckett and Deputy Wendall’s coffee. I said a polite good morning then found a reason to go into the kitchen. I couldn’t watch this. More importantly, I couldn’t let Beckett watch me. His cop instincts made him too good at reading people. Let him think those four men really were just passing through on the way to somewhere else.
My macarons were ready to come out of the oven anyway. I busied myself with sliding them off the tray so they wouldn’t burn. For a moment, I could almost pretend I was somewhere else. The kitchen had the power to transport me. It always had.
A light hand on my back made me jump. My tray nearly fell to the floor but I recovered, found my smile, and turned. Heat poured through my heart as Beckett stood there, eyes full of concern.
“Sorry,” I said, setting the tray on the counter. “Everything okay out there?”
He shrugged. “I was more interested in if everything was okay back here.”
“Oh. Sorry. Just a new recipe I’m trying. Something special just for Crystal Falls. Cookies and cream. You think it’ll work for this crowd?” I handed a cookie to Beckett. Smiling, he took a bite. His eyelids fluttered as he savored the taste. My mind went straight back to that night by the pond when he kissed me.
“Oh, I think you’ve got something here,” he said, finishing the macaron in one bite.
“Good. Maybe I’ll get them on the menu for this afternoon. That is, if anyone shows up.”
“Are you mad at me?” he asked, taking me off guard. A stray hair fell in front of my eyes. Hands on my hips, I blew it away.
“I should have called you after our dinner,” he said. “I’m sorry. Things got a little hectic. Though I know that’s not really an excuse.”
Something flickered behind his eyes. I wouldn’t pretend to be as good at reading people as he was, but it seemed like sadness. Or at least worry. Whatever it was, it at least didn’t appear to have had anything to do with my brother’s men sitting just a few feet away. Maybe this morning wasn’t as doomed as I thought it was.
“It’s okay. I could have called you too. The truth is, I thought about it. I mean ... is everything okay with your friend?”
The question seemed to stun him. Whatever pain he hid, it came rising to the surface and Beckett blanched.
“My turn to say I’m sorry,” I said. “I don’t mean to get into your business. It’s just, this is a small town. The other day I overheard one of my customers talking. They said someone kind of stormed into the station looking for you and you ended up taking him home.”
Beckett pursed his lips. “Small town. Right. Well, I suppose you deserve an explanation anyway. It’s the reason our night got cut short. It was just an old friend passing through. He’d had a little too much to drink and Ramona didn’t want him driving. He’s gone now.”
“Ah.” Voices rose in the dining room. God, why wouldn’t Tommy’s men just leave? The longer they stayed, the more questions it would raise. Beckett wasn’t stupid.
“That’s one of the reasons I stopped by. I mean ... besides just the good service and food. I was thinking we could try again.”
My heart raced. This was a bad idea. With Tommy swirling around, I should keep my distance from Beckett. Hell, I should keep my distance from everyone. I just prayed he’d soon come to his senses and realize Crystal Falls wasn’t worth his time and neither was I.
Beckett took a step toward me and put a hand on my arm. The warmth of his touch made my blood hum. I could still feel the lingering pull of his kiss. I wanted more. God help me. I wanted so much more. Desire flashed in his eyes.
“I’d like that,” I heard myself say. It would be so easy to give into this. This was the kind of thing normal women got to look forward to. They could let their guard down. They could let whoever they wanted into their lives. Hadn’t I earned the right to be like them?
“How about tomorrow night?” he said. “I’ve got a couple of days off coming to me. I can shut off my phone for once. Unless the sky literally starts to fall, I shouldn’t get called away again.”
“Not even for your friend?” I asked, hating myself a little for it. I didn’t want to cause that mysterious look of pain in his eyes. Not even for a second.
“He’s gone,” Beckett said, his expression sober. “Like I said, he was just passing through and wanted to catch up. How do you feel about fishing?”
“For dinner?”
The light came back into Beckett’s eyes. “If we’re lucky. I meant to catch. I haven’t had the chance to take my boat out in weeks. I’d like to take you out on the lake. It’ll be quiet. Peaceful.”
“Sounds perfect. I’ll be done here by three. We can make an afternoon of it?”
His smile melted me. Beckett hooked a finger beneath my chin, lifting it to meet his eyes. His touch sent shivers of pleasure through me. This was dangerous. I couldn’t afford this. If I needed any reminder, it came in the next instant as a shadow darkened the kitchen door.
“We’re ready to cash out.” Damon’s deep voice sent a shockwave through me. I cleared my throat and stepped away from Beckett’s touch. It was too late though. Damon had seen enough. And what he saw, Tommy would know about within the hour.
“I’m sure Addy can take care of that,” Beckett said, stiffening. He turned, putting himself slightly in front of me in a protective stance.
“She can.” Damon smiled. “But Miss Kelly was going to bring us something special.”
“Right,” I said turning to the macarons. I had to pretend things were normal. I couldn’t betray the panic fluttering inside of me
.
A loud beep drew my attention. At the counter, Deputy Wendall’s radio squawked. I stepped around Beckett, getting between him and Damon. I shot Damon a look. He smiled, nodded, then headed back behind the counter.
“You okay?” Beckett asked.
“Fine,” I answered. “And I’m looking forward to tomorrow afternoon.” I said the last bit in a hush, hoping Damon didn’t catch it. But by the glint in his eye, I knew he’d heard enough. Too much.
I stiffened my spine. I would not let Tommy ruin my life all over again.
Chapter Eight
Beckett
The cool, clear waters of Lake Crystal Falls reflected in Lila’s eyes, making them shimmer. She’d been quiet, pensive when I picked her up. Though I didn’t know her well yet, something was bothering her. Instinct told me that something had everything to do with the four suits sitting at her counter yesterday.
I didn’t ask. I didn’t want to assume. For once, I wanted to try and shut off my cynical brain and just enjoy the moment. With Henny’s visit and bad news, my own mental health depended on it.
Henny sobered up on my couch that night. The next morning, I’d driven him back to the station so he could pick up his motorcycle. Then he let me follow him out to the highway. We said our goodbyes at the carpool lot just before the exit. He gave me Brady’s mother’s phone number. There was a memorial service at the end of the month. He wasn’t sure it was a good idea for either of us to go. After all, each one of us had sworn we’d leave the memories of what really happened in Alingar behind us, no matter how much the government wanted to trot us out to sell some story.
I knew in my heart Brady wouldn’t want me there. I sure as hell knew I wouldn’t want him there if it were me. We’d all promised each other no more funerals. We would try to live in the light. Pain pierced my heart knowing Brady couldn’t find his way back to it. Fresh guilt washed over me. If he’d called me. If I’d known. Maybe.
Forget. Move on. There was no other way.
“I think I got something.” Here I was thinking Lila was the pensive one. For half a second, I forgot where I was. The boat shook as Lila struggled with her line. I took a minute. Damn. She was fine. She wore a pair of old cutoff jeans and a faded Boston University sweatshirt. She’d dodged the question when I asked her if it was her alma mater.
“Slow and steady,” I said. “Reel it in.”
The line jumped in her hand and she jerked it, threatening to cross it with mine. I set mine in the holder near my seat and went to her. Leaning over, I put my arms around her and grabbed her hands. I guided her movements as she reeled in the fish. Its silver fins flashed beneath the water as it struggled to free itself.
Finally, the fish broke the surface. She had a fine catfish on the line. I grabbed a net as she pulled the fish into the boat.
“Is that your first one?” I asked, grasping the fish around the thickest part of its body.
“Can we keep that one?” she asked.
“Yep. It’s a fat boy. Good eater.” I guided the hook out of its mouth and tossed the fish into my live well behind the captain’s chair. Lila’s eyes sparkled with pride.
“You seriously telling me nobody’s ever taken you fishing before? Your daddy? An uncle, maybe?”
Lila scrunched her nose, then turned back to the water. Her lure was still on the hook. She cast just the way I’d shown her, her line zinging out across the water.
“Didn’t really have either of those,” she said. “But I was raised by a few strong women.”
“No doubt,” I said, taking a seat beside her. I wanted to know everything about her. I wanted to know what it was that put the worry in her eyes sometimes. At the same time, I guarded my own secrets from her. It wasn’t fair, I knew.
“You always lived in Boston?”
“Actually, Waltham. It’s a suburb. My mother was a dancer. A showgirl, really. She left me with my grandma until I was seven. When she died, my mother came home and stayed there. Her knees were shot.”
I nodded. Part of me wished I could reach back. I could still see a little of Lila’s younger self staring back at me. A little girl, probably missing her mother and dreaming about what stage she was on. And she’d had no father, no strong man to protect her. Maybe she didn’t need one. At least, I was sure she’d convinced herself of that. It made me want to put my arms around her and fight off anyone or anything who tried to hurt her.
“Where is she now?” I asked.
A shadow crossed Lila’s face and I regretted the question. “She died when I was fifteen,” she answered.
Fifteen. Puzzle pieces fell into place. Her mother was dead. Her grandmother too. God.
“I was lucky though,” she said. “Foster care is a nightmare for a lot of kids. My mom had a friend who was willing to take me in. The state let her. I stayed there until I was old enough to file for emancipation.”
“And you’ve supported yourself ... by yourself ever since?” Again, that shadow crossed her face.
“Something like that.” She smiled. “What about you? You said your father was in the Navy. Did you have a big family?”
I shrugged. “Just my brother and me.”
“Older? Younger?”
“Heath is ten months older.”
Lila’s soft laugh skittered across my skin. God, I loved the sound of it. “We call that Irish twins.”
I nodded and recast my line. “Yep. I’ve got a streak of that, anyway. My double great-grandfather on my dad’s side came from County Cork or something.”
“I thought you looked familiar,” she teased, breaking into strong, credible Irish brogue. It startled me for a second, as if she’d just peeled back one mystery only to let a dozen more shroud her. She sensed it too and grew as still as the lake around us.
“Your family,” she finally said. “Far away?”
“Scattered,” I answered. “My father passed a few years ago. My mom moved to a retirement community in the Florida panhandle after that. Heath … my brother, he’s a firefighter. A hotshot. Goes after wildfires in Colorado. We don’t see each other much anymore, but we text every few weeks.”
“Sounds exciting. A real thrillseeker, huh? And then there’s you, living the quiet life here in Crystal Falls. Like night and day.”
There was a question in her words, even though she’d phrased it all as a conclusion. Thrillseeker. Danger junkie. I’d been called that my whole life. Life on the edge. That was Heath and me. Always trying to outdo each other.
“Yep,” I answered, though I could tell she knew I was full of shit. This was dangerous. She skated so close to the truth. The outlines of my past were no secret. Still, I wasn’t sure I could talk about those outlines without Lila guessing at something darker.
She slid her pole into the holster near the bow and turned to me. Her touch was light on my back and yet it still seared me. Her fingers played along the edges of the ink on my right shoulder blade. No one ever asked about it. Hell, no one ever saw it. But today, the bright sun and crystal waters made me feel comfortable enough to go shirtless.
“It’s a trident?” she asked. It was. Held in the grasp of an eagle over an anchor. Brady, Henny, and I had gotten them on the same day just before our first deployment.
“Your father was a Navy man,” she whispered. “And the apple didn’t fall far from the tree?”
“Something like that.” I stiffened. Lila didn’t pull her hand away. She traced a line from my ink, circling her finger around the deep, pitted scar on my right flank. I gasped and clenched my fists. It didn’t hurt anymore, but her touch brought the echoes of pain on the wind.
Lila shifted; sliding out of her seat, she put herself in front of me, slowly sinking to her knees. She gathered my hands in hers and looked up at me. It took me a moment to find the strength to meet her eyes. She’d just peeled back one of the toughest layers of my own mystery.
“Beckett,” she whispered. “What were you before you came to Crystal Falls?”
Final
ly, I let my eyes fall to hers. Her lips were slightly parted. A tiny pulse beat a furious pace near her throat. I wanted to kiss her there. I wanted to kiss her everywhere.
“A SEAL,” I finally said. She swallowed hard and brought her hand up to my cheek.
“And your friend,” she said, “the one from the other night? He was in your unit?”
Dangerous. She was like playing with fire. “It was a long time ago,” I said. “I don’t like to talk about it.”
“You were hurt,” she said, coming up on her knees. Her fingers found the old scar on my side.
“It got me home,” I said. “Got me out.”
“Hmm. Why do I get the feeling you’re really thinking you’re never out?”
Her words stunned me. Too much. Too painful. It was as if she could see straight into my soul. I couldn’t let her. If I did, she’d run. She’d be better off.
“Lila.” I caught her hand in mine and drew it away from my side. I tried to push her away. She pushed back. She came all the way up, kneeling in front of me so we were almost nose to nose.
“I’m sorry they hurt you,” she whispered. “I hope someone was there to take care of you.”
A moment ago, I’d thought the same thing about her, growing up without a dad. I held her arms away from me. I felt suspended in time. It was as if we’d reached a precipice. This was the part where I usually pulled away. Made some joke. Maybe even said something cruel enough to make a woman regret asking me anything personal. It would be so easy. It would be so much safer.
But something about Lila was different. Fire went through me. I burned for her.
“Beckett,” she whispered. She saw me. She saw ... me. Suddenly, I felt starved for her. It was like falling through space. No up. No down. Only her.
I slid my arms around her waist and pulled her to me. Lila’s hands went around my neck. Her heat. Her scent. Her.
